1 00:00:11,425 --> 00:00:17,193 It's The Muppet Show, with our speciaI guest star, Miss Florence Henderson, 2 00:00:25,372 --> 00:00:27,363 # It's time to play the music 3 00:00:27,441 --> 00:00:29,432 # It's time to light the lights 4 00:00:29,509 --> 00:00:33,570 # It's time to meet the Muppets on The Muppet Show tonight 5 00:00:33,647 --> 00:00:35,638 # It's time to put on makeup 6 00:00:35,716 --> 00:00:37,707 # It's time to dress up right 7 00:00:37,784 --> 00:00:41,311 # It's time to raise the curtain on The Muppet Show tonight 8 00:00:43,724 --> 00:00:46,352 Prices are so high, yesterday I bought a pound of hamburger 9 00:00:46,426 --> 00:00:49,293 and had to have a cosigner, 10 00:00:51,231 --> 00:00:53,358 # To introduce our guest star 11 00:00:53,433 --> 00:00:55,230 # That's what I'm here to do 12 00:00:55,302 --> 00:00:57,532 # So it really makes me happy 13 00:00:57,604 --> 00:00:59,504 # To introduce to you 14 00:00:59,573 --> 00:01:01,632 Miss Florence Henderson! 15 00:01:08,415 --> 00:01:12,112 # But now let's get things started on the most sensationaI, inspirationaI 16 00:01:12,185 --> 00:01:14,244 # CelebrationaI, MuppetationaI 17 00:01:14,321 --> 00:01:16,812 # This is what we call 18 00:01:16,890 --> 00:01:19,882 # The Muppet Show 19 00:01:24,898 --> 00:01:27,298 Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, 20 00:01:27,367 --> 00:01:31,098 Now, welcome to the show, and what a fantastic program we have for you tonight, 21 00:01:31,171 --> 00:01:34,334 Our guest star is the beautifuI and talented Florence Henderson, 22 00:01:34,408 --> 00:01:37,309 Boy, she is really great, But to open the show, 23 00:01:37,377 --> 00:01:40,574 one of the most exciting acrobatic acts in the entire business, 24 00:01:40,647 --> 00:01:42,581 the Bouncing Borsolino Brothers, 25 00:01:42,649 --> 00:01:44,674 They've been bouncing since they were baby boys, 26 00:01:44,751 --> 00:01:49,017 In fact, the doctor wasn't even sure they were boys untiI they stopped bouncing, 27 00:01:49,089 --> 00:01:53,651 So here they are, all the way from Boston, the Bouncing Borsolino Brothers! Yeah! 28 00:02:07,774 --> 00:02:10,106 El pyramido. The pyramid, 29 00:02:10,177 --> 00:02:12,668 One, 30 00:02:13,747 --> 00:02:15,738 Two, 31 00:02:18,351 --> 00:02:20,182 Three, 32 00:02:24,224 --> 00:02:26,055 Four, 33 00:02:30,397 --> 00:02:32,228 Five, 34 00:02:36,636 --> 00:02:39,400 Six, That's me, 35 00:02:51,818 --> 00:02:54,548 Why did you do that, Tiny? - I didn't do nothing, 36 00:02:54,621 --> 00:02:57,215 I told you not to get on the top, 37 00:02:59,259 --> 00:03:04,561 Well, they really brought down the house, - Well, at least the stage, 38 00:03:05,031 --> 00:03:07,898 ...975 pounds, I told you not to get on the top, 39 00:03:07,968 --> 00:03:12,132 You're a big disappointment, you guys, - Hey, will you guys watch it? Hey, watch it, 40 00:03:12,205 --> 00:03:15,766 George? Will you go out there and clean up after the pigs, please? 41 00:03:15,842 --> 00:03:19,835 I am sick and tired of cleaning up after them lousy pigs, 42 00:03:19,913 --> 00:03:22,245 Well, George, you can always quit, 43 00:03:22,315 --> 00:03:25,216 What? And get out of show business? 44 00:03:26,586 --> 00:03:30,579 George, will you move the body? - All right, I'll move the body, 45 00:03:32,893 --> 00:03:35,293 I moved the body, 46 00:03:43,770 --> 00:03:48,571 My brother has ghosts in his attic, - Sounds scary, 47 00:03:48,642 --> 00:03:51,941 Yeah, He's on the Ten Most Haunted list, 48 00:03:56,383 --> 00:03:58,817 Ladies and gentlemen, we're happy now, truly, 49 00:03:58,885 --> 00:04:01,581 to present a star of stage, screen and television, 50 00:04:01,655 --> 00:04:03,384 the mother of six on The Brady Bunch, 51 00:04:03,456 --> 00:04:05,651 and the mother of her own bunch of four at home, 52 00:04:05,725 --> 00:04:10,719 our guest for the evening, the lovely Miss Florence Henderson, 53 00:04:20,740 --> 00:04:25,837 # You might wake up some morning 54 00:04:25,912 --> 00:04:32,750 # To the sound of something moving past your window in the wind 55 00:04:32,819 --> 00:04:35,811 # And if you're quick enough to rise 56 00:04:35,889 --> 00:04:42,852 # You'll catch the fleeting glimpse of someone's fading shadow 57 00:04:44,731 --> 00:04:49,532 # Out on the new horizon 58 00:04:49,603 --> 00:04:56,532 # You may see the floating motion of a distant pair of wings 59 00:04:56,610 --> 00:04:59,738 # And if the sleep has left your ears 60 00:04:59,813 --> 00:05:07,515 # You might hear footsteps running through an open meadow 61 00:05:08,421 --> 00:05:11,515 # Don't be concerned 62 00:05:11,591 --> 00:05:14,526 # It will not harm you 63 00:05:14,594 --> 00:05:20,499 # It's only me pursuing something I'm not sure of 64 00:05:20,567 --> 00:05:23,365 # Across my dream 65 00:05:23,436 --> 00:05:26,496 # With nets of wonder 66 00:05:26,573 --> 00:05:34,002 # I chase the bright, elusive butterfly of love 67 00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:41,509 # You might have heard my footsteps echo softly in the distance 68 00:05:41,588 --> 00:05:45,684 # Through the canyons of your mind 69 00:05:45,759 --> 00:05:48,853 # I might have even called your name 70 00:05:48,928 --> 00:05:56,767 # As I ran searching after something to believe in 71 00:05:57,671 --> 00:06:00,765 # Don't be concerned 72 00:06:00,840 --> 00:06:03,673 # It will not harm you 73 00:06:03,743 --> 00:06:09,648 # It's only me pursuing something I'm not sure of 74 00:06:09,716 --> 00:06:12,412 # Across my dream 75 00:06:12,485 --> 00:06:15,579 # With nets of wonder 76 00:06:15,655 --> 00:06:21,594 # I chase the bright, elusive butterfly of love 77 00:06:21,661 --> 00:06:29,329 # I chase the bright, elusive butterfly 78 00:06:30,236 --> 00:06:36,232 # Of love 79 00:06:45,385 --> 00:06:47,615 I told you not to let fatso on the top, 80 00:06:47,687 --> 00:06:49,712 Don't blame me, I'm only a young pig, - Pigs, Listen, pigs, 81 00:06:49,789 --> 00:06:53,088 Will you guys get out of here, please? Come on, pigs, Out! Out! 82 00:06:53,159 --> 00:06:54,524 Move it! Move it! Get out of here, 83 00:06:54,594 --> 00:06:56,994 Out, out, out, out, out! - Oh, Kermit, 84 00:06:57,063 --> 00:06:59,759 You have such a masculine yell, - Oh, yeah, 85 00:06:59,833 --> 00:07:00,993 Is there anything at all, 86 00:07:01,067 --> 00:07:03,399 anything I can do for you, my dear? - No, 87 00:07:03,470 --> 00:07:05,802 Because I want to make you happy, - Good, 88 00:07:05,872 --> 00:07:08,966 When you're happy, the pig is happy, - WonderfuI, 89 00:07:09,042 --> 00:07:11,442 Oh, my love! My life! 90 00:07:11,511 --> 00:07:12,978 Argh! 91 00:07:20,386 --> 00:07:24,789 Forgive me for being so forward, but I'm a liberated pig, 92 00:07:24,858 --> 00:07:27,019 Urgh, - Ta, 93 00:07:28,628 --> 00:07:31,290 It must be my animaI musk, 94 00:07:39,606 --> 00:07:42,507 Two, three, four, two, three... 95 00:07:42,575 --> 00:07:46,671 You know, the trouble with kids today is they don't know what they want, 96 00:07:46,746 --> 00:07:50,079 When I was a kid, I never wanted that, 97 00:07:57,991 --> 00:08:01,927 They're just a couple of floor hogs, - Yeah, 98 00:08:04,464 --> 00:08:07,661 I don't know, maybe it's the wine talking - in fact, I'm sure it is - 99 00:08:07,734 --> 00:08:10,328 but you're beautifuI, 100 00:08:14,107 --> 00:08:17,565 Now tell me the truth, You really don't like dancing with a dog, do you? 101 00:08:17,644 --> 00:08:23,014 What makes you say that? - It's that flea collar you're wearing, 102 00:08:28,354 --> 00:08:30,185 I think we ought to move out of the ghetto 103 00:08:30,256 --> 00:08:33,521 and find ourselves a nice little dump in the suburbs, 104 00:08:33,593 --> 00:08:36,756 Oh, honey, I love you like the plague, 105 00:08:39,465 --> 00:08:43,128 Can we take this moment to announce our engagement? 106 00:08:43,203 --> 00:08:45,467 Yeah, why not? - Oh! 107 00:08:45,538 --> 00:08:49,065 We're engaged! 108 00:08:49,142 --> 00:08:52,669 I've waited so long! We're engaged! 109 00:08:53,746 --> 00:08:55,077 Florence, 110 00:08:55,148 --> 00:08:59,107 your eyes are like two limpid pools, - Oh, that's very sweet, Kermit, 111 00:08:59,185 --> 00:09:03,019 And when I look into your eyes, I'm spellbound, 112 00:09:03,089 --> 00:09:06,581 And when I look into those eyes I see... I see... 113 00:09:06,659 --> 00:09:08,889 Yes? Come on, tell me what you see, 114 00:09:08,962 --> 00:09:10,987 I see trouble, 115 00:09:11,064 --> 00:09:13,999 Hm, hm, hm, Well, well, well, 116 00:09:14,067 --> 00:09:17,264 While the pig's away, the frog will play, hm? 117 00:09:17,337 --> 00:09:22,001 Hi, Piggy, - Don't "Hi, Piggy" me, you frog stealer, 118 00:09:22,075 --> 00:09:23,872 Piggy, you have it all wrong there, You see... 119 00:09:23,943 --> 00:09:26,605 In a pig's eye - I mean, in a person's eye! 120 00:09:26,679 --> 00:09:28,943 Yes, you do have it wrong, Piggy, - Oh? 121 00:09:29,015 --> 00:09:33,247 Yes, Kermit was just practicing on me what he really wants to say to you, 122 00:09:33,319 --> 00:09:34,809 What? - Oh, 123 00:09:34,888 --> 00:09:36,412 You mean it? - No, 124 00:09:36,489 --> 00:09:38,150 Oh, Kermit! 125 00:09:38,224 --> 00:09:39,555 Oh! 126 00:09:39,626 --> 00:09:42,789 My love! My love! My life! 127 00:09:42,862 --> 00:09:45,888 Oh, I am like putty in your hands, 128 00:09:45,965 --> 00:09:49,696 Putty! Putty! - # Cement mixer 129 00:09:50,603 --> 00:09:52,730 Nothing, - But... 130 00:09:52,805 --> 00:09:55,239 What happened? What happened? 131 00:09:55,308 --> 00:09:57,606 Piggy, Piggy, come here a minute, - Yes? 132 00:09:57,677 --> 00:09:59,702 Listen, Can I give you a little tip? 133 00:09:59,779 --> 00:10:02,373 Oh, no, There's no need for that, I'm well paid, 134 00:10:02,448 --> 00:10:04,439 No, I mean about men, 135 00:10:04,517 --> 00:10:08,476 Oh, my dear, I'm sure you know about men, 136 00:10:08,554 --> 00:10:10,681 But, honey, 137 00:10:10,757 --> 00:10:14,386 make one move toward that frog's bod... 138 00:10:14,460 --> 00:10:15,825 Mmm, 139 00:10:15,895 --> 00:10:19,023 Piggy, Kermit and I are old friends, honest, 140 00:10:19,098 --> 00:10:22,795 You mean there's nothing...? - No, we're just... It's just platonic, really, 141 00:10:22,869 --> 00:10:24,393 Oh! Oh! 142 00:10:24,470 --> 00:10:26,995 Oh, thank you so much! Thank you! 143 00:10:27,073 --> 00:10:30,474 Oh, I'm off to find my love, Oh, oh, oh! 144 00:10:30,543 --> 00:10:33,205 She's crazy, 145 00:10:33,279 --> 00:10:37,978 Has she gone? - Yes, She's off to find her love! 146 00:10:38,051 --> 00:10:40,144 I told you never to touch him! 147 00:10:40,219 --> 00:10:42,847 Hii-yah! - Piggy! Stop it! 148 00:10:50,330 --> 00:10:54,164 When I was a puppy, I used to enjoy reading about Winnie the Pooh, 149 00:10:54,233 --> 00:10:57,327 He's a bear, like Fozzie Bear, but... 150 00:10:57,403 --> 00:10:59,701 Well, not very much like Fozzie Bear, 151 00:10:59,772 --> 00:11:01,205 This is a song he would sing 152 00:11:01,274 --> 00:11:04,903 when somebody would say something he didn't quite understand, 153 00:11:04,978 --> 00:11:08,675 He could have said, "What?" or "I beg your pardon?" 154 00:11:08,748 --> 00:11:11,148 But Pooh would instead sing this song, 155 00:11:11,217 --> 00:11:14,914 which he made up for singing when his brain felt fluffy, 156 00:11:14,988 --> 00:11:16,046 Goes like this: 157 00:11:16,122 --> 00:11:20,183 # Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston pie 158 00:11:20,259 --> 00:11:24,662 # A fly can't bird, but a bird can fly 159 00:11:24,731 --> 00:11:29,031 # Ask me a riddle and I reply 160 00:11:29,102 --> 00:11:33,562 # Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston pie 161 00:11:37,844 --> 00:11:40,472 Now, this is where the song changes key, 162 00:11:40,546 --> 00:11:43,140 What we call a modulation, 163 00:11:45,885 --> 00:11:48,410 That's G sharp minor, 164 00:11:49,322 --> 00:11:53,315 # Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston pie 165 00:11:53,393 --> 00:11:57,796 # A fish can't whistle and neither can I 166 00:11:57,864 --> 00:12:02,130 # Ask me a riddle and I reply 167 00:12:02,201 --> 00:12:04,465 # Cottleston, Cottleston 168 00:12:04,537 --> 00:12:10,134 # Cottleston pie 169 00:12:10,209 --> 00:12:14,942 # Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston pie 170 00:12:15,014 --> 00:12:19,383 # Why does a chicken? I don't know why 171 00:12:19,452 --> 00:12:23,980 # Ask me a riddle and I reply 172 00:12:24,057 --> 00:12:28,994 # Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston pie 173 00:12:47,780 --> 00:12:52,376 OK, Time once again, friends, to raise the intellectuaI leveI of our program, 174 00:12:52,452 --> 00:12:55,250 as our paneI discusses questions of lasting importance, 175 00:12:55,321 --> 00:12:57,516 And our guest tonight is Miss Florence Henderson, 176 00:12:57,590 --> 00:13:00,787 Thank you, Good evening, everyone, - Hey, baby, 177 00:13:00,860 --> 00:13:05,854 OK, And tonight's question is one that has bothered scholars everywhere: 178 00:13:05,932 --> 00:13:08,560 "Was William Shakespeare in fact Bacon?" 179 00:13:09,902 --> 00:13:12,393 Is this some kind of bad joke? 180 00:13:12,472 --> 00:13:16,408 I-I-I don't understand, Piggy, - Bacon, my love, bacon, 181 00:13:16,476 --> 00:13:19,536 I am tired of these continuaI pig slurs, - Oh, 182 00:13:19,612 --> 00:13:22,137 You know, we pigs have feelings too, - Oh, no, no, no, no, 183 00:13:22,215 --> 00:13:24,240 You see, I meant Francis Bacon, 184 00:13:24,317 --> 00:13:28,253 France's bacon, Italy's bacon, Czechoslovakia's bacon, 185 00:13:28,321 --> 00:13:31,222 Who cares? It's all bad taste, 186 00:13:31,290 --> 00:13:36,125 Oh, no, Bacon tastes reaI good, I had some this morning, Really made a pig of myself! 187 00:13:37,964 --> 00:13:41,092 That does it! Pigs of the world, unite! 188 00:13:41,167 --> 00:13:44,159 Piggy, Please, Piggy, We don't have time for that now, 189 00:13:44,237 --> 00:13:48,139 Yeah, Besides, you're always hogging the time, Get it? Hogging? 190 00:13:48,207 --> 00:13:51,836 Get this, weirdo, Hii-yah! Hii-yah! 191 00:13:51,911 --> 00:13:53,538 Hii-yah! Hii-yah! 192 00:13:53,613 --> 00:13:56,514 Wait a minute! Hold it, hold it, hold it! Wait a minute! 193 00:13:56,582 --> 00:13:59,346 Piggy, come on, now, Can we get back to the subject in hand? 194 00:13:59,418 --> 00:14:01,113 Miss Piggy, please, - I'm sorry, 195 00:14:01,187 --> 00:14:04,156 Get back over there, OK, the subject in hand, Florence? 196 00:14:04,223 --> 00:14:08,091 Well, there's no question in my mind, - As to what? 197 00:14:08,161 --> 00:14:13,326 Nothing, There's no question in my mind, No answer either, 198 00:14:13,399 --> 00:14:14,957 We have a saying in my country: 199 00:14:15,034 --> 00:14:18,492 "A woman who laughs at her own jokes seldom has branches on her shoetrees," 200 00:14:18,571 --> 00:14:23,440 That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard, - So, don't visit our country, 201 00:14:23,509 --> 00:14:25,773 Please, The topic is... The topic is: 202 00:14:25,845 --> 00:14:28,973 "Were Shakespeare's works actually written by Francis Bacon?" 203 00:14:29,048 --> 00:14:30,413 All right, all right, Listen, 204 00:14:30,483 --> 00:14:34,078 We've been listening offstage and we've had enough of this garbage about bacon, 205 00:14:34,153 --> 00:14:36,815 Right, We pigs are true artists, 206 00:14:36,889 --> 00:14:39,380 Miss Henderson, would you like to see our acrobatic act? 207 00:14:39,458 --> 00:14:40,550 Yes, I'd love to, 208 00:14:40,626 --> 00:14:42,560 No, no, you don't want to see the acrobatic act, 209 00:14:42,628 --> 00:14:44,619 And one, and... 210 00:14:44,697 --> 00:14:47,689 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 211 00:14:48,334 --> 00:14:50,825 It's cute, Cute act, 212 00:14:50,903 --> 00:14:53,394 I'm sorry about that, Miss Henderson, but... 213 00:14:53,472 --> 00:14:57,135 Listen, we'll be back next week with another vitaI question for our paneI: 214 00:14:57,210 --> 00:15:00,441 "Do attack dogs make good house pets?" 215 00:15:07,620 --> 00:15:10,589 Wake... wake me when the show starts, 216 00:15:10,656 --> 00:15:13,819 It's already been on a while, - Oh, 217 00:15:13,893 --> 00:15:16,555 Wake me when it's over, 218 00:15:19,532 --> 00:15:23,332 We got to get organized down here, Will somebody tell those pigs to knock it off? 219 00:15:23,402 --> 00:15:24,664 Knock it off! 220 00:15:24,737 --> 00:15:26,500 Knock it off! - Knock it off! 221 00:15:26,572 --> 00:15:28,563 Now, will we knock off the knocking-it-offs? 222 00:15:28,641 --> 00:15:31,439 Knock off the knocking-it-offs! - Knock off the knocking-it-offs! 223 00:15:31,510 --> 00:15:35,571 Knock off the knocking-it-offs! - Knock it off! 224 00:15:35,648 --> 00:15:39,482 You'll not see any more pigs on this show, If I ever see another pig... 225 00:15:39,552 --> 00:15:42,350 Oh, Kermit, every time you yell 226 00:15:42,421 --> 00:15:45,117 it sends a shudder through my body, - WonderfuI, 227 00:15:45,191 --> 00:15:49,150 I tremble with desire and uncontrollable passion, 228 00:15:49,228 --> 00:15:55,895 In you I see a seething volcano ready to erupt like Vesuvius and explode... 229 00:15:55,968 --> 00:16:00,268 Aaargh! We have a show to do! Will you get out of here? 230 00:16:01,907 --> 00:16:05,843 He loves me, - I give up, 231 00:16:05,911 --> 00:16:07,674 I knew you would, 232 00:16:07,747 --> 00:16:10,238 Aaargh! Oh! Argh! 233 00:16:17,056 --> 00:16:18,717 OK, here he comes again now, folks, 234 00:16:18,791 --> 00:16:21,954 so stand by, sit tight, hold on and fasten your seatbelts, 235 00:16:22,028 --> 00:16:24,326 The Muppet Show's own furry funnyman, 236 00:16:24,397 --> 00:16:26,661 here he is, Mr, Fozzie Bear! 237 00:16:26,732 --> 00:16:29,701 Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, 238 00:16:29,769 --> 00:16:33,170 OK, gang, Grab your shoes and grab your socks, 239 00:16:33,239 --> 00:16:35,264 Here come the jokes, here come the yocks, 240 00:16:35,341 --> 00:16:38,276 Now, tonight I'm gonna try and put something new in my act, 241 00:16:38,344 --> 00:16:41,108 Yeah, Like comedy, maybe, 242 00:16:41,180 --> 00:16:43,842 Hey, look, guys, I paid a lot of money for this new act 243 00:16:43,916 --> 00:16:45,850 and I want to see if it's good, OK? 244 00:16:45,918 --> 00:16:50,252 Could it possibly be good? - Could it possibly be worse? 245 00:16:51,657 --> 00:16:56,390 OK, now, tonight I will do impressions of great movie actors from great movies, 246 00:16:56,462 --> 00:16:58,054 Great! WonderfuI! - Love 'em! 247 00:16:58,130 --> 00:16:59,427 OK, OK, OK, OK, 248 00:16:59,498 --> 00:17:03,832 First, Humphrey Bogart from Casablanca. 249 00:17:08,874 --> 00:17:11,900 Play it again, Sam, 250 00:17:11,977 --> 00:17:13,103 OK, OK, OK, OK, 251 00:17:13,179 --> 00:17:17,081 Now, next is Jimmy Cagney from Mister Roberts. 252 00:17:19,952 --> 00:17:22,284 Who took my palm tree? 253 00:17:23,189 --> 00:17:26,590 OK, next, Cary Grant from all his movies, 254 00:17:28,828 --> 00:17:31,319 Judy, Judy, Judy, 255 00:17:32,231 --> 00:17:35,064 Listen, all your impressions sound the same, 256 00:17:35,134 --> 00:17:38,126 I can't help that, They were all written by the same writer, 257 00:17:38,204 --> 00:17:42,163 He's got a point there, - Yeah, on his head, 258 00:17:42,241 --> 00:17:44,539 OK, any other impressions? Impressions, huh? 259 00:17:44,610 --> 00:17:49,479 Yeah, We'd like to see an impression of a bear leaving a stage, 260 00:17:49,548 --> 00:17:53,882 Gotcha, Gotcha, Presenting a bare stage, 261 00:17:55,621 --> 00:17:58,146 Ha, Bare, Get it? I'm a bear, No one on the stage, 262 00:17:58,224 --> 00:18:02,786 Oh, I'm terrific, I love me, I'm too good for this show, Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, 263 00:18:02,862 --> 00:18:07,390 You know, he's getting better, - Yeah, or we're getting worse, 264 00:18:09,101 --> 00:18:12,264 Once again, the lovely Miss Florence Henderson, 265 00:18:15,241 --> 00:18:17,903 Ah, Florence, I don't quite know how to say this, 266 00:18:17,977 --> 00:18:20,571 but me and a lot of the guys are really fond of you, 267 00:18:20,646 --> 00:18:23,843 Oh, Lizard, that's very flattering, 268 00:18:24,750 --> 00:18:27,742 # Imagine me and you, I do 269 00:18:27,820 --> 00:18:30,687 # I think about you day and night 270 00:18:30,756 --> 00:18:36,217 # It's only right to think about the girI you love and hold her tight 271 00:18:36,295 --> 00:18:40,891 # So happy together 272 00:18:40,966 --> 00:18:44,367 # If I should call you up, invest a dime 273 00:18:44,437 --> 00:18:48,498 # And you say you belong to me and ease my mind 274 00:18:48,574 --> 00:18:52,476 # Imagine how the world would be, so very fine 275 00:18:52,545 --> 00:18:57,812 # So happy together 276 00:18:57,883 --> 00:19:02,650 # I can't see me loving nobody but you 277 00:19:02,721 --> 00:19:05,815 # For all my life 278 00:19:05,891 --> 00:19:10,828 # When you're with me, baby, the skies will be blue 279 00:19:10,896 --> 00:19:14,059 # For all my life 280 00:19:14,133 --> 00:19:16,931 - # Me and you - # And you and me 281 00:19:17,002 --> 00:19:20,961 # No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be 282 00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:24,976 - # The only one for me is you - # And you for me 283 00:19:25,044 --> 00:19:28,275 # So happy together 284 00:19:28,347 --> 00:19:30,281 Come on, everybody, sing it! 285 00:19:30,349 --> 00:19:35,252 # I can't see me loving nobody but you 286 00:19:35,321 --> 00:19:38,381 # For all my life 287 00:19:38,457 --> 00:19:43,451 # When you're with me, baby, the skies will be blue 288 00:19:43,529 --> 00:19:46,692 # For all my life 289 00:19:46,765 --> 00:19:49,495 - # Me and you - # And you and me 290 00:19:49,568 --> 00:19:53,595 # So happy together 291 00:19:53,672 --> 00:19:57,733 # So happy together 292 00:19:57,810 --> 00:20:01,712 # Bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, bah 293 00:20:01,780 --> 00:20:06,046 # So happy together 294 00:20:06,118 --> 00:20:08,177 # We're happy 295 00:20:08,254 --> 00:20:14,250 # Together 296 00:20:19,698 --> 00:20:23,532 We didn't have time for Gonzo on the show this week, That's too bad, 297 00:20:23,602 --> 00:20:28,437 Well, Romeo, how are you and Miss Henderson getting along, hm? 298 00:20:28,507 --> 00:20:31,305 Piggy, jealousy doesn't become you, 299 00:20:31,377 --> 00:20:34,676 Jealous? Moi? 300 00:20:34,747 --> 00:20:37,773 'Tis to laugh, 301 00:20:37,850 --> 00:20:42,082 I'm just glad that other women find my frog attractive, 302 00:20:42,154 --> 00:20:43,280 Your frog? 303 00:20:43,355 --> 00:20:48,452 "Piggy," said the frog, trying to couch his next words in the gentlest of terms: 304 00:20:48,527 --> 00:20:51,189 "I am not your frog!" 305 00:20:52,264 --> 00:20:56,132 Methinks thou doth protest too much, - What? 306 00:20:56,201 --> 00:20:59,261 Shakespeare, - Sounds more like Bacon, 307 00:20:59,338 --> 00:21:01,602 From a ham, 308 00:21:03,509 --> 00:21:06,273 How would you like a pork chop? 309 00:21:06,345 --> 00:21:07,539 Hii-yah! 310 00:21:07,613 --> 00:21:10,173 Hii-yah! Hii-yah! 311 00:21:12,952 --> 00:21:16,388 You always hurt the one you love, - Oh, 312 00:21:16,455 --> 00:21:18,548 Hii-yah! 313 00:21:20,426 --> 00:21:22,223 Oh, Florence, 314 00:21:22,294 --> 00:21:25,263 You know, I could really fall for you, 315 00:21:25,331 --> 00:21:27,561 Oh, sweetums, 316 00:21:27,633 --> 00:21:29,965 Are you serious? 317 00:21:33,138 --> 00:21:34,935 He's serious, 318 00:21:36,108 --> 00:21:39,669 This is Kermit the Frog speaking to you from the planet Koozebane, 319 00:21:39,745 --> 00:21:40,734 There's a hush in the air, 320 00:21:40,813 --> 00:21:44,909 This is the traditionaI time of courtship of the Koozebanian creatures, 321 00:21:44,984 --> 00:21:47,475 We're waiting now for the male Koozebanian creature 322 00:21:47,553 --> 00:21:49,453 to make the first move, 323 00:21:49,521 --> 00:21:53,013 Hii-yoo! 324 00:21:54,126 --> 00:21:56,287 Hark! That may be him now, 325 00:21:56,362 --> 00:21:59,525 Hii-yoo! Wang, wang, wang, wang, wang, wang, wang, wang! 326 00:22:03,002 --> 00:22:05,027 Wonk wonk! 327 00:22:05,104 --> 00:22:08,301 Now, that is the "wonk wonk" signaI to the female creature, 328 00:22:08,374 --> 00:22:11,343 Let's see if she makes the traditionaI response, 329 00:22:16,915 --> 00:22:19,577 Yeah, that is the traditionaI response to the wonk wonk, 330 00:22:23,389 --> 00:22:27,257 Ah, there she is, and what a beauty, 331 00:22:27,326 --> 00:22:29,920 Now the tender rituaI begins, 332 00:22:32,598 --> 00:22:37,695 Watch as the male makes the first overture to the female, known as the "hargee," 333 00:22:37,770 --> 00:22:39,795 Hargee! 334 00:22:40,039 --> 00:22:42,030 Hargee! 335 00:22:42,274 --> 00:22:45,175 Haaargee! 336 00:22:50,916 --> 00:22:52,850 I believe she likes him, 337 00:22:52,918 --> 00:22:54,909 Hii-yoo! 338 00:22:55,154 --> 00:22:57,054 Hii-yoo! 339 00:22:57,122 --> 00:23:00,649 Hiiii-yoo! 340 00:23:04,096 --> 00:23:06,860 Boy, did you see that? That was the signaI, 341 00:23:06,932 --> 00:23:10,891 They're going to do the "galley-oh-hoop-hoop," 342 00:23:12,971 --> 00:23:14,495 This should be very exciting, 343 00:23:14,573 --> 00:23:19,510 It's a television first, ladies and gentlemen, the Koozebanian galley-oh-hoop-hoop, 344 00:23:19,578 --> 00:23:22,843 Watch closely, now, They're going far away, 345 00:23:22,915 --> 00:23:25,509 He's just about to make his turn now, 346 00:23:27,519 --> 00:23:29,248 Hey you, 347 00:23:29,321 --> 00:23:31,687 mar brabee! 348 00:23:31,757 --> 00:23:34,317 Me braboobee! 349 00:23:34,393 --> 00:23:36,987 O-o-o-o-o-oh, yahoo! 350 00:23:37,062 --> 00:23:40,054 Wow! Stavite! 351 00:23:40,132 --> 00:23:42,623 This is it, ladies and gentlemen, the galley-oh-hoop-hoop, 352 00:23:42,701 --> 00:23:45,192 Galley-oh! 353 00:23:45,270 --> 00:23:47,636 Hoop hoop! 354 00:23:59,752 --> 00:24:05,622 Well, there you have it, friends, Once again, love comes to Koozebane, 355 00:24:12,498 --> 00:24:14,830 OK, well, that's about all the show we have for you tonight, 356 00:24:14,900 --> 00:24:17,767 We want to thank our very speciaI guest, Miss Florence Henderson! 357 00:24:17,836 --> 00:24:20,361 Yeah! 358 00:24:20,439 --> 00:24:22,873 Hey, listen, Thank you, Florence, for being our guest, 359 00:24:22,941 --> 00:24:24,499 We hope you enjoyed it as much as we did, 360 00:24:24,576 --> 00:24:28,535 Oh, you know I did, Kermit, especially our love scene, 361 00:24:28,614 --> 00:24:31,242 Wire for Miss Henderson, Wire for Miss Henderson, 362 00:24:31,316 --> 00:24:34,046 Are you Miss Henderson? - You know I am, Fozzie, 363 00:24:34,119 --> 00:24:36,587 There's a wire for you, 364 00:24:37,489 --> 00:24:41,892 Well, that does it, folks, We'll see you all next time on The Muppet Show! 365 00:25:19,932 --> 00:25:24,801 I loved it, - So what? You also loved World War II,