1 00:00:43,913 --> 00:00:45,166 - Can you manage Grandad? - Yeah. 2 00:00:45,729 --> 00:00:53,492 Good. Mind your hernia. Yeah, that's not bad you know - not bad. I reckon we done well there. 3 00:00:53,999 --> 00:00:59,796 Yeah, it's alright for you. Waste of money if you ask me! Come all this way an' all! 4 00:01:00,711 --> 00:01:01,907 What do you mean a waste of money? 5 00:01:02,484 --> 00:01:03,916 I mean, look at 'em, they're beautiful ain't they! 6 00:01:04,557 --> 00:01:08,157 Not only are they an exquisite ornament guaranteed to brighten and adorn any sideboard, 7 00:01:08,543 --> 00:01:12,875 but they are also a revolving musical box! 8 00:01:14,495 --> 00:01:18,683 They are china cats that play How Much is that Doggy in the Window! 9 00:01:21,057 --> 00:01:24,291 Well, what d'you want for one pound and twenty-five pence - 'okla-bleedin'-homa'? 10 00:01:26,053 --> 00:01:30,084 Well don't you think it's a bit sick you know - a cat playing a song about a dog? 11 00:01:32,585 --> 00:01:34,978 No. It means they're unique! 12 00:01:35,901 --> 00:01:39,770 It means there was a balls-up at the factory and they put the wrong chimes in! 13 00:01:42,877 --> 00:01:45,096 Yeah, I'll put the wrong chimes in you in a minute. 14 00:01:45,670 --> 00:01:50,195 Come on. Get this stuff loaded into the van, right. Get this gear in 'ere. 15 00:01:52,770 --> 00:01:54,342 No, actually, you know he's got a point there. 16 00:01:54,947 --> 00:01:59,222 I bet there is some trader somewhere who's got lumbered with a gross of revolving dogs 17 00:01:59,499 --> 00:02:01,313 playing The Siamese Cat Song! 18 00:02:01,803 --> 00:02:05,084 Very funny. Come on Grandad, we want you in here an' all. 19 00:02:05,249 --> 00:02:05,992 Right, go on. 20 00:02:06,151 --> 00:02:07,588 - In you go. - Alright, alright. 21 00:02:07,758 --> 00:02:09,806 Jam him in - go on. The door will hold him in. 22 00:02:16,266 --> 00:02:18,139 Don't worry - we're going to earn out of this. 23 00:02:20,054 --> 00:02:27,921 No listen. This is not rubbish you know. This is North Korea's finest porcelain. 24 00:02:28,513 --> 00:02:31,870 But our two great cultures have a different attitude towards animals. 25 00:02:32,279 --> 00:02:37,450 We are both a nation of dog lovers – the only difference is they love to eat 'em! 26 00:02:39,535 --> 00:02:41,844 Come on Rodders, get your finger out, we've got a long drive home. 27 00:02:51,826 --> 00:02:53,113 Do they really eat 'em? 28 00:02:53,593 --> 00:02:59,596 Yeah, would I lie to you? If a North Korean came to live in London 29 00:02:59,752 --> 00:03:02,408 he'd think that Battersea Dog's Home was a take-away! 30 00:03:04,203 --> 00:03:09,288 No, there's nothing they like more than a nice plate of poodle kebabs. 31 00:03:09,812 --> 00:03:15,630 - Oh leave it out will yer! - Or a bull terrier pie. 32 00:03:15,857 --> 00:03:22,307 - Alright Del Boy, that's enough! - Or sweet 'an sour greyhound. 33 00:03:24,685 --> 00:03:29,366 Oi! - one more word out of you and I'm gonna be sick on your sheepskin, and I mean it! 34 00:03:37,682 --> 00:03:44,116 Go on, put yer foot down Rodney. I'm starving! I could just go a nice Jack Russell and chips. 35 00:03:44,616 --> 00:03:46,608 For the last time shut up! 36 00:03:50,060 --> 00:03:52,037 Oi, look, shall we pull over and give her an 'and? 37 00:03:52,249 --> 00:03:54,152 Do me a favour, I wanna get home for the pubs! 38 00:03:54,327 --> 00:03:57,535 We just can't leave her stuck out here in the middle of nowhere, can we! 39 00:03:57,915 --> 00:04:01,708 You're a right little angel you are aren't you, eh? Go on then, pull over! 40 00:04:10,535 --> 00:04:12,601 Good afternoon madam, can I be of any assistance? 41 00:04:12,782 --> 00:04:16,230 Oh that's awfully nice of you. Do you know anything about cars? 42 00:04:16,869 --> 00:04:21,231 Do I know anything about cars? I used to drive for the John Player Special team. 43 00:04:21,517 --> 00:04:23,006 Oh, the Grand Prix circuit? 44 00:04:23,162 --> 00:04:26,273 No, delivering fags round Lewisham. 45 00:04:28,183 --> 00:04:29,531 He's a card ain't he? 46 00:04:32,146 --> 00:04:37,431 I'm trying to get to Ridgemere Hall, it's that large estate about five miles back up the road. 47 00:04:37,642 --> 00:04:41,791 Ridgemere Hall. That's that big mansion what we passed Del! 48 00:04:42,715 --> 00:04:44,314 You in service there? 49 00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:47,556 Certainly not! I live there - I'm Lady Ridgemere! 50 00:04:48,884 --> 00:04:52,172 Lady Ridgemere! Rodney, get the tow rope. 51 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:58,962 Would you come with me m'lady, I'll get you home in no time at all. 52 00:05:00,453 --> 00:05:03,267 Here we are. Did you go to the wedding? 53 00:05:05,726 --> 00:05:09,826 The wedding? Oh the wedding? Yes, we did. 54 00:05:10,014 --> 00:05:14,518 Yeah, it was a lovely do weren't it? Yeah. We watched it on our telly - in colour. 55 00:05:15,236 --> 00:05:18,579 It's a pity we didn't know you then 'cos we were doing a lovely line in toasters. 56 00:05:19,252 --> 00:05:25,872 That would have made a blinding present! May I? Mind the hole. 57 00:05:54,613 --> 00:05:57,205 Right Rodney, undo the tow rope and give Grandad his scarf back will you. 58 00:06:00,673 --> 00:06:02,642 Is everything alright m'lady? 59 00:06:02,956 --> 00:06:09,267 No Wallace - everything is not alright! The car broke down and I was stranded in the middle of nowhere! 60 00:06:09,969 --> 00:06:11,824 Oh, dear - how dreadful for you! 61 00:06:12,488 --> 00:06:15,184 And who are these - 'people'? 62 00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:25,020 Oh they towed me home that's all. Now be a good chap Wallace and do push the car round to the garage. 63 00:06:25,214 --> 00:06:26,661 Oh very well m'lady! 64 00:06:28,228 --> 00:06:34,495 Oi - you shouldn't be pushing a car like that at your age! Keep your knees bent, and your back straight. 65 00:06:45,146 --> 00:06:46,249 Did you hear that? 66 00:06:46,758 --> 00:06:53,268 And who are these 'people'? Ponce! Come Del let's go! Here you are Grandad. 67 00:06:53,466 --> 00:06:55,331 Go? What do you mean 'go'? 68 00:06:56,124 --> 00:07:00,258 You don't think I'm leaving here without so much as a cucumber sandwich and a cup of Earl Grey do yer? 69 00:07:00,839 --> 00:07:05,423 This is fate, Rodney, Unison Oppotunaire. There's gotta be an earner in it. 70 00:07:06,041 --> 00:07:10,286 Oh no, come on Del, most nobility are brassic nowadays aren't they? 71 00:07:10,472 --> 00:07:13,634 Oh yeah, and where do you think they get them from then, eh? Out of a Christmas cracker? 72 00:07:14,323 --> 00:07:17,836 Yeah, alright, so they've got the money. But they don't wanna know the likes of us do they? 73 00:07:18,088 --> 00:07:20,462 No, they think we're peasants! 74 00:07:21,343 --> 00:07:26,632 Peasants? What do you mean 'peasants'? They may think that you two are peasants! 75 00:07:27,484 --> 00:07:29,927 Well come to think that I think you two are peasants! 76 00:07:30,741 --> 00:07:33,406 But me, I'm one of them that's accepted anywhere – 77 00:07:33,757 --> 00:07:41,849 whether it's drinking lager with the market boys down at Nine Elms, or sipping Pimm's fruit cup at Hendon regatta! 78 00:07:43,778 --> 00:07:45,934 Oi up, eyes down for a full house, it's his lordship! 79 00:07:49,092 --> 00:07:53,680 I say. I'm sorry, I'm afraid we're not open to the public for another three weeks! 80 00:07:53,861 --> 00:07:56,118 No, no, your grace, you're under a misapprehension. 81 00:07:56,448 --> 00:07:58,187 We're not members of the general public! 82 00:07:58,454 --> 00:08:01,834 We're friends of your wife – she's just popped the car round to the garages. 83 00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:06,013 Oh, I see! Well, er, in that case I suppose you'd better come in. 84 00:08:06,201 --> 00:08:08,664 Oh right. Thanks very much your grace! 85 00:08:11,882 --> 00:08:19,285 And, oi, these are very refined people and they do not wish to hear your joke about the queer magician. Got it? 86 00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:23,761 And don't you go dropping none in there! 87 00:08:30,785 --> 00:08:36,379 Very nice, very nice! They don't make pictures like that any more do they, eh? No. 88 00:08:36,949 --> 00:08:40,914 'Cos I'm a great fan of the Byzantine period myself. I don't think you can whack 'em you know... 89 00:08:41,690 --> 00:08:47,566 Now it's a funny thing you know, your Lordship, but Van Cough happens to be my favourite artist an' all. 90 00:08:48,141 --> 00:08:52,510 - It's a Canaletto! - I beg your pardon Rodney? 91 00:08:53,694 --> 00:08:55,120 It's a Canaletto!! 92 00:08:59,399 --> 00:09:02,134 I know - I know it's a Canaletto. 93 00:09:02,417 --> 00:09:06,416 I was just saying that Van Cough happens to be one of my favourite artist that's all! 94 00:09:07,572 --> 00:09:09,534 Here, why do you reckon he chopped his ear off, eh? 95 00:09:09,892 --> 00:09:12,298 - Doctor's orders possibly! - Do you think so! 96 00:09:12,753 --> 00:09:15,525 - Your brandy sir. - Oh thank you very much. 97 00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:18,216 I'm afraid we have run out of cream soda! 98 00:09:18,664 --> 00:09:21,424 - Oh well, don't worry about it Wallace. - I shan't sir! 99 00:09:22,380 --> 00:09:23,022 Excuse me sir. 100 00:09:23,170 --> 00:09:29,276 Certainly. Gives good measures here don't he. You ought to watch him. Very nice, very nice. 101 00:09:30,536 --> 00:09:35,746 There he is - look at that, lovely. I didn't know you went to Cambridge though m'lord! 102 00:09:36,099 --> 00:09:40,459 - 'Cos I'm an Oxford man meself. - You were up at Oxford? 103 00:09:40,657 --> 00:09:43,404 No, but he always supports them in the boat race! 104 00:09:44,163 --> 00:09:46,268 Yeah, thank you Grandad! Thank you. 105 00:09:46,559 --> 00:09:48,534 You must be in a hurry to get home Mr Trotter? 106 00:09:48,754 --> 00:09:52,278 Oh no, no, no m'lady...no, no, no. No, we've got all the time in the world. 107 00:09:52,879 --> 00:10:00,007 All the time in the world. Yeah, I love this place, beautiful ain't it. 108 00:10:00,246 --> 00:10:04,851 Beautiful house. I think I saw a photograph of it once in the, er, Horse and Hound. 109 00:10:05,043 --> 00:10:07,602 The Horse and Hound! You hunt Mr Trotter? 110 00:10:07,844 --> 00:10:11,359 Oh yes, I hunt, punt and ski when the snow's firm enough. 111 00:10:12,498 --> 00:10:15,371 - How old is it? - Er, is what - how old is what? 112 00:10:15,547 --> 00:10:16,920 The house - is it old? 113 00:10:17,112 --> 00:10:20,757 Yes, the original structure was built in 1642. 114 00:10:20,938 --> 00:10:25,126 - Oh! Still you've done it out nice! - Thank you. 115 00:10:25,790 --> 00:10:27,294 Is it haunted? 116 00:10:27,654 --> 00:10:29,710 Oi, what you after a part-time job or something? 117 00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:33,767 No, I'm afraid the one thing we lack is a resident ghost. 118 00:10:34,011 --> 00:10:36,802 Oh, never mind you've still got Wallace ain't you. 119 00:10:37,348 --> 00:10:38,344 Yes Wallace, what is it? 120 00:10:38,507 --> 00:10:41,412 Begging your pardon m'lord. There's a telephone call for you. 121 00:10:41,731 --> 00:10:43,004 The chandelier people. 122 00:10:43,233 --> 00:10:45,907 Ah, and about time too. You will excuse me, won't you? 123 00:10:47,653 --> 00:10:49,594 Yes, go on. You take yer time m'lord 124 00:10:50,053 --> 00:10:52,891 Oh this is nice. I see that you like a bit of china and porcelain m'lady. 125 00:10:53,330 --> 00:10:58,434 Yeah, this is very nice - this. I like this. 126 00:10:59,295 --> 00:11:02,883 Now don't tell me - don't tell me Capo Del Monte? 127 00:11:03,383 --> 00:11:07,883 It's mostly Dresden. And that particular piece is worth several hundred pounds. 128 00:11:08,198 --> 00:11:10,948 Is it really? Gawd, get away, feel the weight of that then Rodney. 129 00:11:11,582 --> 00:11:14,868 Yeah, it is ain't it, eh? Yeah, of course that's where the money is ain't it - in the weight. 130 00:11:15,078 --> 00:11:21,353 Oh mon dieu, mon dieu, if you like a nice piece of fine porcelain 131 00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:23,871 I've got the very thing for you in the back of the van. 132 00:11:25,258 --> 00:11:27,141 Don't inconvenience yourself Mr Trotter. 133 00:11:27,291 --> 00:11:32,911 No, no, it's no trouble m'lady. No trouble. I picked it up in this little, er, antique shop in Yeovil. 134 00:11:33,302 --> 00:11:36,618 Well it's, um, it's well circa something or another! 135 00:11:36,873 --> 00:11:38,499 I'll pop out and fetch one for you shall I? 136 00:11:39,648 --> 00:11:43,154 Right keep sprawnsing alright? Excuse me m'lady. 137 00:11:50,698 --> 00:11:55,526 Where do you live? That is assuming you're not squatting here! 138 00:11:57,259 --> 00:12:01,553 No, er, we live in London. One of - one of the better parts of London! 139 00:12:01,975 --> 00:12:03,493 Yeah Peckham. 140 00:12:05,301 --> 00:12:12,410 It's, um, Peckham Village actually! It's, er, well like a little St John's Wood you know, just south of the water. 141 00:12:12,919 --> 00:12:15,807 It's very nice! We've got a flat in a tower block. 142 00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:27,354 Well it's an apartment! In a - in a complex. A tall complex. Very sophisticated actually. It's got lifts - everything! 143 00:12:28,346 --> 00:12:32,314 Yes. Must be quite valuable with the price of property these days? 144 00:12:32,547 --> 00:12:34,303 Oh no, we rent it. 145 00:12:34,958 --> 00:12:39,069 No, we - we lease it! He forgets bless him. 146 00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:44,971 He's got a bit of shrapnel! It's a lease Grandad - do you remember, a long-term lease! 147 00:12:45,285 --> 00:12:51,764 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. We lease it! The council said we could buy it for eight thousand pounds though! 148 00:12:52,825 --> 00:12:53,989 God help us! 149 00:12:55,019 --> 00:12:57,854 Yes, yes, but it must be in your office somewhere! 150 00:12:58,470 --> 00:13:01,645 All I know is that your people came down here, examined the chandeliers. 151 00:13:01,997 --> 00:13:05,578 That was three weeks ago and I am still waiting for your estimate! 152 00:13:06,637 --> 00:13:11,405 Yes. Well, I suggest you have another good look...Yes I'll hold on. 153 00:13:13,547 --> 00:13:16,379 - Bisque porcelain! - What? 154 00:13:16,541 --> 00:13:20,820 Demi-glazed! It revolves and plays How Much is that Doggy in the Window! 155 00:13:21,156 --> 00:13:22,892 You can't go wrong for a fiver can yer, eh? 156 00:13:23,471 --> 00:13:24,454 No, I suppose not. 157 00:13:24,737 --> 00:13:26,814 No. Don't be long, I'll pour you a drink, alright? 158 00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:33,842 Just a minute Potter, er, Trotter How Much is that Doggy in the Window? 159 00:13:34,093 --> 00:13:39,631 Don't know, depends on how much you want to spend. Little joke, no, no, no, it's the tune ain't it. 160 00:13:39,850 --> 00:13:43,741 How much is that doggy in the window. The one with the waggly tail. 161 00:13:43,925 --> 00:13:46,831 Yes, yes, yes, yes, I know. I know. The thing is a cat! 162 00:13:52,181 --> 00:13:56,395 Oh well, you're right an' all, it's times like this that I wish I went to Cambridge! 163 00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:58,828 Tell you what, look, I'll pour you a drink. Don't be long. 164 00:13:59,819 --> 00:14:05,127 Hello? You found it! Good. Twelve hundred pounds? 165 00:14:05,301 --> 00:14:09,911 Are you sure you're looking at the right paperwork? Yes, two Louis 14th chandeliers - that's right! 166 00:14:10,171 --> 00:14:13,390 But how do you arrive at a figure of twelve hundred pounds? 167 00:14:13,593 --> 00:14:17,207 All you've got to do is take the things down, clean them, do a few minor repairs! 168 00:14:17,444 --> 00:14:22,873 Yes I am aware that it is 17th-century French crystal, I own the damned things! 169 00:14:23,309 --> 00:14:25,931 Yes, I know it's a job for an expert that's why I got in touch with you! 170 00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:30,298 But I'm sure if I shopped around I - I could find a lower estimate than that. 171 00:14:30,879 --> 00:14:35,957 Yes I know that it is a dying trade but there must be someone, somewhere! 172 00:14:39,466 --> 00:14:42,112 Oh, sorry we couldn't stay longer yer lordship. 173 00:14:43,632 --> 00:14:46,724 That's perfectly alright Trotter, please don't apologize. 174 00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:52,660 Oh toujours la politesse, toujours. I mean this is beautiful innit, eh? 175 00:14:53,494 --> 00:14:55,728 Bet you've held a few balls in here m'lady? 176 00:14:56,283 --> 00:14:59,308 What? Oh yes, yes we have! 177 00:15:00,235 --> 00:15:04,282 We like a nice social gathering ourselves. Perhaps you'd like to come to the next one, eh Rodney? 178 00:15:04,939 --> 00:15:08,178 Yeah, yeah, I mean, you know, just bring a bottle and an LP or something. 179 00:15:09,233 --> 00:15:13,675 Thank you for the 'cat' Mr Trotter. It blends so well with the rest of my collection. 180 00:15:14,084 --> 00:15:16,132 Specially with the Dresden I thought! 181 00:15:16,361 --> 00:15:21,333 Yes! I'm sorry we weren't able to pay you for it. But neither my husband nor I carry cash. 182 00:15:21,727 --> 00:15:23,796 Oh don't worry, pay me next time I'm down. 183 00:15:23,964 --> 00:15:26,554 Yes of course. What do you mean 'next time'? 184 00:15:26,791 --> 00:15:29,197 D'you mean to say you're coming here again? Whatever for? 185 00:15:29,558 --> 00:15:32,303 To pick up that fiver she owes him! 186 00:15:33,315 --> 00:15:38,084 A la mode, a la mode! Please accept it as a token of my esteem. 187 00:15:38,447 --> 00:15:39,488 Thank you! 188 00:15:40,163 --> 00:15:45,544 Yes, well, it's getting rather late! I think we – we better say goodbye, er, Trotter. 189 00:15:45,895 --> 00:15:49,958 Trotter, yeah. Well thank you very much for your hospitality, it's been very nice of you. 190 00:15:51,068 --> 00:15:54,001 Now look at that - that's beautiful innit, eh? 191 00:15:54,193 --> 00:15:55,680 Yes. Goodbye. 192 00:15:56,319 --> 00:15:58,732 - French crystal? - Yes, it is actually! 193 00:15:59,029 --> 00:16:03,449 Yeah, thought it was. You can always tell by the old, er, cut of the er...droplets! 194 00:16:03,904 --> 00:16:06,062 17th century that, ain't it Grandad? 195 00:16:06,844 --> 00:16:08,369 Yeah, if you like Del! 196 00:16:08,996 --> 00:16:13,545 Yeah, I'd say it was one of the Louis's! If it ain't one of the Louis's, it's very similar, ain't it Rodney? 197 00:16:14,729 --> 00:16:16,960 Oh it's a dead ringer Del, yeah, dead ringer! 198 00:16:17,218 --> 00:16:21,478 Yeah, yeah, but is it Louis the 13th or Louis the 14th? 199 00:16:21,682 --> 00:16:24,248 No don't tell me, your Lordship I can get this. 200 00:16:24,522 --> 00:16:27,610 That is Louis the 14th. Am I right yer lordship? 201 00:16:27,824 --> 00:16:30,960 Spot on Trotter! How do you come to know so much about chandeliers? 202 00:16:34,255 --> 00:16:36,394 How come we know so much about chandeliers! 203 00:16:42,337 --> 00:16:43,602 Oh sorry. 204 00:16:43,885 --> 00:16:45,756 Sorry about our amusement there your lordship! 205 00:16:45,952 --> 00:16:49,953 But see asking a Trotter if he knows anything about chandeliers is like asking Mr Kipling 206 00:16:50,114 --> 00:16:52,216 if he knows anything about cakes! 207 00:16:53,829 --> 00:16:54,982 This is our business! 208 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:56,221 Really? 209 00:16:56,534 --> 00:17:01,175 Oh yeah. Chandelier, candelabra, quality crystal and what 'ave yer. 210 00:17:01,324 --> 00:17:02,795 It's been the family trade for generations. 211 00:17:02,951 --> 00:17:05,920 Knowledge has been passed down from father to son. 212 00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:08,326 Our name goes right back in history don't it Rodney? 213 00:17:10,945 --> 00:17:17,126 Yeah, yeah, right the way back to the plague! 214 00:17:20,607 --> 00:17:22,578 Our forefathers used to make them – 215 00:17:23,091 --> 00:17:27,503 did you know there are still four Trotters hanging in Buckingham Palace? 216 00:17:29,259 --> 00:17:30,654 Amazing! 217 00:17:30,977 --> 00:17:35,691 No, straight up - 'cos what, with the advent of solar energy and fluorescent lighting, 218 00:17:35,862 --> 00:17:37,347 there's not much call for it nowadays. 219 00:17:37,691 --> 00:17:41,477 In recent years we've tended to specialize in the old, er, renovation work. 220 00:17:42,275 --> 00:17:46,253 Do you mean to say that you could - you could take that thing down and - and clean and repair it? 221 00:17:46,523 --> 00:17:48,602 Oh yeah, do that blindfold. 222 00:17:49,026 --> 00:17:53,363 Anyway we mustn't keep you any later, so I'm gonna say bonne bouche to you both! 223 00:17:53,542 --> 00:17:55,018 No hurry Trotter, no hurry! 224 00:17:55,196 --> 00:17:59,440 I've just remembered I've got a bottle of rather special port through there in the study. 225 00:17:59,674 --> 00:18:01,666 What say we open it and - and have a bit of a chat, eh? 226 00:18:01,850 --> 00:18:03,928 Oh well that's very civil of you my Lord. 227 00:18:08,528 --> 00:18:10,366 Don't be a plonker all your life Rodney! 228 00:18:10,552 --> 00:18:16,096 I've done the deal now. It's 350 quid just to take down and clean a couple of chandeliers. 229 00:18:16,286 --> 00:18:17,976 And do you honestly think he's gonna pay us? 230 00:18:18,159 --> 00:18:21,515 Of course he's gonna pay us! He ain't one of your fly-by-night merchants. 231 00:18:21,738 --> 00:18:26,785 I mean he's a lord of the realm, he's got blue blood and - and mottos! 232 00:18:27,256 --> 00:18:29,041 He didn't even pay us for that cat! 233 00:18:29,202 --> 00:18:31,376 Oh shut up about that rotten cat! 234 00:18:32,056 --> 00:18:38,433 Del, you need specialized equipment for a job like this - refined glass brushes, advanced soldering gear. 235 00:18:38,649 --> 00:18:42,674 What we gonna use, eh? Superglue and a bottle of Windolene knowing you! 236 00:18:43,260 --> 00:18:48,411 Look I'll get the right equipment Rodney, I know this panel beater and he owes me a favour. 237 00:18:48,733 --> 00:18:54,186 Look once we've done this job our name will spread. All those dukes an' earls they'll be crying out for us. 238 00:18:54,918 --> 00:18:58,712 Just imagine it, eh? We'll be the toast of the county set, eh? 239 00:18:58,928 --> 00:19:01,443 Just think of it, all the hounds, you know, 240 00:19:01,659 --> 00:19:06,745 baying with excitement, as our steeds bite on the rein eager for the chase. 241 00:19:08,962 --> 00:19:13,785 Hello Tally ho Sir Herbert. Did you ken John Peel? Come on boy... 242 00:19:14,281 --> 00:19:15,593 Take a look at him will yer! 243 00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:19,604 He's spent three hours in a stately home and he thinks he's the Earl of Sandwich! 244 00:19:20,484 --> 00:19:23,965 He can't wait to get a shotgun and a retriever and go marching across the grouse moors 245 00:19:24,135 --> 00:19:26,678 all done up like a ploughman's lunch can he? 246 00:19:28,665 --> 00:19:34,046 No, that's right Rodney. I deserve a bit of the good life, worked hard enough for it, 247 00:19:34,581 --> 00:19:39,054 I mean I've always been a trier. Where's it got me? 248 00:19:40,167 --> 00:19:46,204 Nowhere that's where it's got me! We live 'alf a mile up in the sky in this lego set built by the council. 249 00:19:47,747 --> 00:19:50,218 Run a three-wheel van with a bald tyre. 250 00:19:50,467 --> 00:19:54,255 We drink in wine bars where the only thing's got a vintage is the guvnor's wife! 251 00:19:55,166 --> 00:20:00,463 That's why I want to grab this opportunity with both hands Rodney. You know, he who dares wins. 252 00:20:01,420 --> 00:20:04,077 This time next year we'll be millionaires. 253 00:20:05,388 --> 00:20:10,026 Do you honestly believe that Del? I mean, do you really think we can make a success of this? 254 00:20:10,331 --> 00:20:18,207 Of course we can Rodney. The door will be opened to a new world. It'll be like...like Alex Through the Looking Glass. 255 00:20:19,295 --> 00:20:25,221 You will dine at the finest restaurants on – on steak chasseur and sutee potatoes. 256 00:20:26,019 --> 00:20:29,416 Your shoes will be made by Gucci, your jewellery will come from 257 00:20:29,582 --> 00:20:41,348 Aspreys, your clothes will be made by Man at C & A! What d'you reckon Rodders, eh? What d'you reckon? 258 00:20:43,749 --> 00:20:48,448 Man at C & A. Yeah, alright. I'll give it a whirl. 259 00:20:48,633 --> 00:20:50,767 Good boy. You know it makes sense don’t you? 260 00:20:50,959 --> 00:20:53,233 Oi, but we do a proper job, right. No bodging! 261 00:20:53,530 --> 00:20:55,888 Of course not, what do you take me for, eh? 262 00:20:58,181 --> 00:21:05,202 - I'll save the best bit for you. - I'll see you in the morning then. 263 00:21:05,559 --> 00:21:08,637 Yeah see you in the morning. Night. 264 00:21:16,339 --> 00:21:21,072 'No bodging.' I think he lacks faith in you Del Boy! 265 00:21:22,499 --> 00:21:27,269 Always been his trouble innit, eh? Oi, 'ere, do me a favour will you Grandad. 266 00:21:28,143 --> 00:21:31,768 Pop out in the kitchen see if we've got any Windolene and superglue left, will you? 267 00:21:51,602 --> 00:21:54,215 Righto Grandad, you pop upstairs and get the floor-boards up! 268 00:21:54,436 --> 00:21:55,620 Now you know what you're doing don't you? 269 00:21:55,766 --> 00:21:58,045 Don't you worry Del, leave it to me. 270 00:21:59,426 --> 00:22:00,816 Oh he's a craftsman! 271 00:22:02,467 --> 00:22:04,387 Oi, Grandad, d'you want a jemmy! 272 00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:07,916 No I had one before we left. 273 00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:15,326 Why does he have to remove the floorboards? 274 00:22:15,783 --> 00:22:18,933 What is this, the International Year of the Wally-Brain or something? 275 00:22:19,508 --> 00:22:23,485 Listen, my good man, how do you think that great big heavy chandelier 276 00:22:23,669 --> 00:22:25,320 stays up there on that ceiling, eh? 277 00:22:25,492 --> 00:22:29,241 It is not by the power of prayer or double-sided sticky tape! 278 00:22:29,858 --> 00:22:32,407 There is a long threaded bolt through that chandelier, 279 00:22:32,695 --> 00:22:37,014 it goes through a wooden joist and is held in position by a locking nut. 280 00:22:37,196 --> 00:22:42,514 Now in order to undo the locking nut you must first lift up the floorboards! Ordre du jour! 281 00:22:42,873 --> 00:22:48,406 We learn something new every day! If you need me I shall be round at the garages. 282 00:22:48,772 --> 00:22:52,032 Right. Here, while yer there give the van a wash, will you. 283 00:22:53,236 --> 00:22:57,566 Ah, talking of wally-brains. Come on. Here - watch that! 284 00:22:59,732 --> 00:23:05,479 I mean this is terrific innit. His lordship's nowhere to be seen and now even the butler's having a moody! 285 00:23:06,155 --> 00:23:07,391 D'you reckon we're gonna get paid? 286 00:23:07,559 --> 00:23:13,033 Look, his lordship is away on holiday, he'll pay us when he gets back! Now come on, get these ladders up. 287 00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:16,020 Yeah, you never know might be in for a bonus. 288 00:23:16,430 --> 00:23:20,000 Oh yeah, perhaps he might bring us back a nice stick of rock each, eh? 289 00:23:20,174 --> 00:23:23,306 Well just shut up moaning will yer! Oi, Grandad how you doing? 290 00:23:23,718 --> 00:23:25,930 Alright Del Boy. 291 00:23:30,711 --> 00:23:32,676 I've found it Del! 292 00:23:33,093 --> 00:23:37,499 Here you are. See, he's found the nut. I told you we could trust him. Right come on get this out. 293 00:23:37,696 --> 00:23:39,177 I've started to undo it. 294 00:23:41,487 --> 00:23:43,572 Gordon Bennett, we ain't even up the ladders yet! 295 00:23:44,012 --> 00:23:46,824 Grandad - don't you touch nuffink till we tell you. 296 00:23:50,050 --> 00:23:51,635 Come on, we'd better get up there. 297 00:23:54,181 --> 00:23:55,828 Alright Rodders? Is there anything you want? 298 00:23:56,012 --> 00:23:59,332 Yeah, I wanna go home! This ladder's none too safe. 299 00:23:59,511 --> 00:24:03,825 The ladder's alright. Look this is the chance I've been waiting for. 300 00:24:04,070 --> 00:24:06,375 Now, don't let me down Rodders - now don't let me down! 301 00:24:07,034 --> 00:24:13,218 Alright Grandad, we're ready! You can start undoing it now! 302 00:24:13,919 --> 00:24:16,358 It's coming Del Boy! 303 00:24:26,488 --> 00:24:28,411 One more turn Del! 304 00:24:28,952 --> 00:24:33,583 Right. Now brace yourself Rodney, brace yourself! 305 00:24:52,408 --> 00:24:54,592 Grandad was undoing the other chandelier! 306 00:24:58,020 --> 00:24:59,477 How can you tell? 307 00:25:33,549 --> 00:25:35,270 Alright Del Boy? 308 00:25:37,618 --> 00:25:41,490 Alright? What do you mean 'alright'? Look at it! 309 00:25:43,527 --> 00:25:45,012 Did you drop it Del? 310 00:25:46,413 --> 00:25:52,165 Drop it? How could we drop it? We wasn't even holding it! We were working on that one! 311 00:25:53,160 --> 00:26:01,143 Well I wish you'd said something. I was working on this one! Is it very valuable Del? 312 00:26:03,852 --> 00:26:08,589 No, not really! It was bleedin' priceless when it was hanging up there though! 313 00:26:11,237 --> 00:26:13,630 What's his lordship gonna say when he finds out? 314 00:26:14,313 --> 00:26:19,578 Well, I think I can safely say that my invitation to the hunt ball has gone for a Burton! 315 00:26:21,666 --> 00:26:23,064 It's broken! 316 00:26:24,298 --> 00:26:27,180 Look, what the hell do you know about chandeliers anyway? 317 00:26:28,871 --> 00:26:30,410 I think he's tumbled Del! 318 00:26:30,827 --> 00:26:33,821 I shall telephone his lordship at his cottage immediately! 319 00:26:34,014 --> 00:26:35,589 Yeah, well, tell him to phone us at home. 320 00:26:35,817 --> 00:26:39,206 Oh. by the way, has his lordship got our home address and telephone number? 321 00:26:40,432 --> 00:26:41,337 No! 322 00:26:41,538 --> 00:26:44,008 Good! Right, out of it. Go on. 323 00:27:03,296 --> 00:27:05,362 Subtitles by NVL