1
00:00:10,544 --> 00:00:13,247
Sometimes
the world looks perfect

2
00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:19,487
* Sometimes you just
get a feeling

3
00:00:19,553 --> 00:00:22,490
* Like you need
some kinda change

4
00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:29,497
* Nothing's gonna
stand in my way

5
00:00:29,563 --> 00:00:32,866
* This flame in my heart
like a long lost friend

6
00:00:32,933 --> 00:00:37,471
* Gives every dark street
a light at the end

7
00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:41,175
* Standing tall

8
00:00:41,242 --> 00:00:44,912
* On the wings of my dream

9
00:00:44,978 --> 00:00:47,848
* Rise and fall

10
00:00:47,915 --> 00:00:51,719
* On the wings of my dream

11
00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:53,254
* The rain and thunder

12
00:00:53,321 --> 00:00:54,922
* The wind and haze

13
00:00:54,988 --> 00:00:58,392
* I'm bound for better days

14
00:00:58,459 --> 00:01:02,029
* It's my life and my dream

15
00:01:02,096 --> 00:01:05,133
* Nothing's gonna stop me now *

16
00:01:20,614 --> 00:01:21,682
Balki.

17
00:01:21,749 --> 00:01:23,417
Do we have any
dental floss left?

18
00:01:23,484 --> 00:01:25,486
Oh, no cousin,
I tied the last
of it around

19
00:01:25,553 --> 00:01:27,288
my finger
to remind me

20
00:01:28,456 --> 00:01:30,090
to buy dental floss.

21
00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:32,760
Oh, great.

22
00:01:32,826 --> 00:01:34,428
Just when I could
really use
the confidence

23
00:01:34,495 --> 00:01:36,230
a good flossing gives me.

24
00:01:39,167 --> 00:01:43,036
Hey, cousin, I...

25
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,638
I gotta get
to the Paper early.

26
00:01:44,705 --> 00:01:46,540
I've got a lot of
work to do.

27
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,309
Mr. Burns is taking me
to lunch today.

28
00:01:48,376 --> 00:01:51,379
Mmm, cousin,
that's wonderful.

29
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,814
It ain't every day
your boss
take you to lunch.

30
00:01:53,881 --> 00:01:55,883
It isn't any day.

31
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:59,052
He's never done it.

32
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,422
Mmm.
All right,
I got my lucky tie.

33
00:02:01,489 --> 00:02:04,325
My lucky socks,
my lucky pen.

34
00:02:05,559 --> 00:02:07,161
My lucky pen.

35
00:02:07,228 --> 00:02:08,762
Balki, have you seen
my lucky pen?

36
00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:10,398
Many times, cousin.

37
00:02:13,267 --> 00:02:15,269
But I look at it again
if you want.

38
00:02:18,706 --> 00:02:20,474
There it is.
What's it doing here?

39
00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:23,110
Oh, po-po.
I forgot.

40
00:02:23,177 --> 00:02:25,112
I use it to write
a letter to mama.

41
00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:28,482
Cousin, did you know
that if you shake
the fountain pen

42
00:02:28,549 --> 00:02:30,584
so that a big
glob of ink
come on the paper

43
00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:34,054
and then you stick
the tip of your pen
in the glob

44
00:02:34,121 --> 00:02:37,725
it will suck the ink
right back up
inside itself?

45
00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:42,363
I show you.

46
00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:45,766
Balki, you want to write
a letter to your Mama,

47
00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:48,869
here are pens.
Use any of them
you like.

48
00:02:48,936 --> 00:02:52,206
Do not use my lucky pen!

49
00:02:52,273 --> 00:02:55,409
Well, excuse me
for being a good son.

50
00:02:57,711 --> 00:02:59,613
My keys.
Where are my keys?

51
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:03,384
Are you talking about
your regular keys
or your lucky keys?

52
00:03:04,885 --> 00:03:07,187
Balki, I've lost
my car keys!

53
00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:09,757
No, you haven't,
I know where they are.

54
00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:11,359
You do

55
00:03:11,425 --> 00:03:13,261
I give them to Jennifer.

56
00:03:13,327 --> 00:03:14,928
You gave my car keys
to Jennifer?

57
00:03:14,995 --> 00:03:17,865
Well, of course I did,
don't be ridiculous.

58
00:03:17,931 --> 00:03:19,933
Your car wouldn't start
without them.

59
00:03:21,735 --> 00:03:23,537
Jennifer had to go
to the airport

60
00:03:23,604 --> 00:03:26,540
and her car wouldn't work,
so I give her your car.

61
00:03:29,410 --> 00:03:31,211
My car?
Yes.

62
00:03:31,279 --> 00:03:33,881
She was very grateful.
She give me a hug.

63
00:03:35,182 --> 00:03:36,784
A big one.

64
00:03:39,487 --> 00:03:40,821
I can't believe
this is happening.

65
00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:42,890
I can't believe
you're doing this to me.

66
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:46,627
Cousin, correct me
if I'm wrong,

67
00:03:46,694 --> 00:03:48,629
but I have
a stinkin' feeling.

68
00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:51,465
Are you angry with me?

69
00:03:51,532 --> 00:03:54,435
Yes! Yes, I am angry!

70
00:03:54,502 --> 00:03:56,670
Because of you,
I can't floss

71
00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:59,239
I wasted precious time
looking for my lucky pen

72
00:03:59,307 --> 00:04:02,142
and now I have to
take the bus which
leaves in five minutes!

73
00:04:02,209 --> 00:04:05,979
Wait, wait, wait.
Cousin, please, don't go.

74
00:04:06,046 --> 00:04:10,017
I... I'm sorry, I almost
ruined your day but,
but don't go.

75
00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:14,154
We have to talk
about it.

76
00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:16,056
I don't want to
talk to you.

77
00:04:16,123 --> 00:04:19,360
But cousin,
I could get dressed,

78
00:04:19,427 --> 00:04:21,161
or we can talk about it
when we get to work,

79
00:04:21,228 --> 00:04:24,031
or we could talk about it
on our coffee break or...

80
00:04:44,852 --> 00:04:46,687
You, mail-boy.

81
00:04:46,754 --> 00:04:49,289
Oh, hello,
Mrs. Van Wisser,
having a nice day?

82
00:04:49,357 --> 00:04:50,924
As a matter of fact,
I'm not.

83
00:04:50,991 --> 00:04:55,663
You know something,
I'm not either.

84
00:04:55,729 --> 00:05:03,637
that would have
curdled your hair.

85
00:05:03,704 --> 00:05:07,307
There were 20 messages
from Mrs. Porterfield
on my desk.

86
00:05:07,375 --> 00:05:10,578
Didn't you mail
my RSVP to her
daughter's wedding?

87
00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:12,613
Well, of course I did.

88
00:05:12,680 --> 00:05:15,282
Thank goodness,
we wouldn't want
the most important

89
00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:17,117
society editor
in town to miss it.

90
00:05:17,184 --> 00:05:20,954
Well, of course
we wouldn't.
Don't be ridiculous.

91
00:05:23,190 --> 00:05:25,893
Me, you cretin.

92
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:30,798
Oh, po-po!
I'm not a Cretan,
I'm a Mypiot.

93
00:05:30,864 --> 00:05:32,866
But we're often mistaken
for Cretans

94
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:35,936
because there is a certain,
uh, similarity in
the bone structure

95
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:38,906
and the long
tapering face and, uh,

96
00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:41,008
somewhat lugubrious
nose and, uh...

97
00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:45,312
Oh. Who cares?
As long as you
mailed the RSVP.

98
00:05:45,379 --> 00:05:51,485
Well, I did,

99
00:05:51,552 --> 00:05:53,220
What little note?

100
00:05:53,286 --> 00:05:54,822
You know,
the one you clipped
to the outside

101
00:05:54,888 --> 00:05:57,157
of the envelope
that says,

102
00:05:57,224 --> 00:06:00,728
"I wouldn't miss
this marriage
for the world.

103
00:06:00,794 --> 00:06:03,130
"It must have cost
the old bag

104
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:06,033
"a bundle
to marry off
her daughter.

105
00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:09,537
"Remind me to send
a sympathy card
to the groom."

106
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:14,041
Now, you find a Cretan
who can remember that.

107
00:06:16,343 --> 00:06:19,480
You sent that note
to Mrs. Porterfield?

108
00:06:19,547 --> 00:06:21,549
Yes, and you don't
have to thank me now.

109
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:23,183
It's just part of my job,

110
00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:25,385
just part of my job.

111
00:06:25,453 --> 00:06:27,555
That was a note
to my secretary.

112
00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:29,690
Oh, well, that's where
you made your mistake.

113
00:06:29,757 --> 00:06:31,792
When you want to
send something
to your secretary,

114
00:06:31,859 --> 00:06:34,495
you use an inter-office
envelope.

115
00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:38,432
And that way
you save 22 cents.

116
00:06:38,499 --> 00:06:40,434
You're going to
pay for this.

117
00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:42,503
Well...

118
00:06:42,570 --> 00:06:43,937
Okay, but
just this once.

119
00:06:44,004 --> 00:06:45,839
Next time you buy
your own stamps.

120
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:51,178
Thank you, Harry.

121
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,346
Cousin. Cousin.

122
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,015
Can we talk now?

123
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:56,850
Cousin.

124
00:06:58,986 --> 00:07:01,354
Cousin, please,
stand still
and talk to me.

125
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:03,724
Balki, I am having
a bad day.

126
00:07:03,791 --> 00:07:06,193
I got pushed off the bus
at the wrong stop,

127
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:12,933
my lucky pen leaked,

128
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,168
Cousin, I know
you're nervous
about your lunch today,

129
00:07:15,235 --> 00:07:17,170
but, listen, on Mypos
we have a saying,

130
00:07:17,237 --> 00:07:18,772
and I'm gonna skip
right to the English,

131
00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:21,308
'cause I know
you're in a hurry.

132
00:07:21,374 --> 00:07:23,210
When you have
an argument
with a friend

133
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:26,079
you've got to
stop right now
and talk about it,

134
00:07:26,146 --> 00:07:30,117
otherwise your
anger will grow
and fester inside of you

135
00:07:30,183 --> 00:07:33,987
until you explode
like a cat on
a hot tin roof.

136
00:07:36,557 --> 00:07:37,791
So...

137
00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:42,129
we talk, talk when
you get back?

138
00:07:45,866 --> 00:07:47,568
I'll be right here.

139
00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:52,272
Well, if they let me
pack a gun,

140
00:07:52,339 --> 00:07:54,675
crooks would
think twice about
robbing this joint.

141
00:07:54,742 --> 00:07:59,613
If they let you
pack a gun,

142
00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:03,216
Hi, Harriette.
Hi, Jimmy.

143
00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:04,718
I'm goin' to lunch.

144
00:08:04,785 --> 00:08:06,620
Can I, can I wear it?

145
00:08:06,687 --> 00:08:08,822
That's a big 10-4,
good buddy.

146
00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:11,925
Oh, well,
of course it is.
Don't be ridiculous.

147
00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:14,094
Is that a yes
or a no?

148
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:15,529
It's a yes.

149
00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:17,130
Be careful
of that nightstick.

150
00:08:17,197 --> 00:08:18,999
You might put
someone's eye out.

151
00:08:24,938 --> 00:08:26,073
Cousin.

152
00:08:27,207 --> 00:08:28,508
Cousin.

153
00:08:33,647 --> 00:08:35,482
What's his problem?

154
00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,618
I am.

155
00:08:37,685 --> 00:08:39,720
Cousin Larry's
very angry with me.

156
00:08:39,787 --> 00:08:41,922
Oh, I know all about
that kind of thing.

157
00:08:41,989 --> 00:08:45,659
My husband has two moods,
angry and angrier.

158
00:08:47,895 --> 00:08:49,997
But Harriette,
he won't even
talk to me.

159
00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:54,301
He won't even stand still
long enough to talk to me.

160
00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:57,638
Well, you know what I do
when my husband
behaves like Larry?

161
00:08:57,705 --> 00:08:59,607
I make him
get in the car
and I drive

162
00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:01,141
until he decides
to talk about it.

163
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:03,777
Does it work?
Keeps my marriage together.

164
00:09:03,844 --> 00:09:05,713
And we've seen
all 50 states.

165
00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:11,451
You know, I would love
to take a car ride
with Cousin Larry,

166
00:09:11,518 --> 00:09:13,453
but we don't have a car,

167
00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:16,423
and I think that's
part of the reason
he's mad at me.

168
00:09:17,991 --> 00:09:19,860
Well, listen, honey,
if you want things

169
00:09:19,927 --> 00:09:23,530
to be right
between you two,

170
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:25,198
no matter what it takes.

171
00:09:27,701 --> 00:09:29,169
why don't you take
the window?

172
00:09:31,839 --> 00:09:33,807
I'll see you later, baby.
Thank you.

173
00:09:33,874 --> 00:09:34,908
Bye.

174
00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:39,279
Mmm.

175
00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:04,404
Cousin, are you sure
you don't...

176
00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:07,274
Balki, leave me alone.

177
00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:12,646
Those are hand cuffs.

178
00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:14,948
What are you doing?

179
00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:22,322
They don't come off
until you talk to me.

180
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:24,892
Balki, take
these cuffs off.

181
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,326
Not until you talk to me.

182
00:10:26,393 --> 00:10:29,830
Open these cuffs!

183
00:10:29,897 --> 00:10:32,265
Balki, if you don't
take these...
All right.

184
00:10:35,268 --> 00:10:39,907
I'm not angry anymore.
I'm over it.

185
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:44,244
Now, why don't you take
these cuffs off?

186
00:10:44,311 --> 00:10:46,479
Give me the key!

187
00:10:46,546 --> 00:10:49,182
Talk first, key second.

188
00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:56,389
Oh! Stop it.
Stop it, stop it.
Would you stop it?

189
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:58,358
Okay, look, but you...
Oh, oh, oh, no...

190
00:11:00,293 --> 00:11:01,428
All right, All right.

191
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:03,964
Balki, what do you
want from me?

192
00:11:04,031 --> 00:11:05,933
Cousin, I want to
be friends again.

193
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:08,401
I want you to tell me
what it is I did wrong,

194
00:11:08,468 --> 00:11:09,737
where it is I went wrong?

195
00:11:09,803 --> 00:11:12,172
Look, you don't loan
a person's car

196
00:11:12,239 --> 00:11:16,009
without asking
their permission!

197
00:11:16,076 --> 00:11:17,745
your ox-cart
you lend them
your ox-cart.

198
00:11:17,811 --> 00:11:20,781
Balki, if we were
talking about an ox-cart
I wouldn't care,

199
00:11:20,848 --> 00:11:23,984
but we're talking
about my car.
I love my car.

200
00:11:24,051 --> 00:11:26,086
Cousin, I'm sorry,
I'm sorry.

201
00:11:26,153 --> 00:11:29,356
I never, never do it
again without asking
your permission.

202
00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:31,959
Well, that's all I ask.

203
00:11:37,230 --> 00:11:38,265
Mmm.

204
00:11:39,900 --> 00:11:43,536
I'm sorry I got so upset,

205
00:11:43,603 --> 00:11:45,572
Oh, I know, I know.

206
00:11:45,638 --> 00:11:47,941
Can we take these off?
Oh, okay.

207
00:11:50,911 --> 00:11:52,312
Appleton.

208
00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:53,613
Uh, yes, sir.

209
00:11:53,680 --> 00:11:54,915
Uh...

210
00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:58,051
Will you excuse us,
Bartokomous?

211
00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:06,827
Appleton, I...

212
00:12:10,831 --> 00:12:12,199
Appleton?

213
00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:14,734
Excuse us, Balki.

214
00:12:20,908 --> 00:12:23,576
I suppose you're
wondering why I'm
taking you to lunch.

215
00:12:23,643 --> 00:12:25,345
Yes, as a matter of fact
I was, sir.

216
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:27,280
Well, I didn't want to
tell you before because

217
00:12:27,347 --> 00:12:29,282
quite frankly,
you're a little
high-strung.

218
00:12:29,349 --> 00:12:32,853
You know,
I've noticed
that myself,

219
00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:36,489
this man is just
gonna pop...

220
00:12:36,556 --> 00:12:39,026
but I'll be right over here
in case anybody needs me.

221
00:12:43,463 --> 00:12:45,332
The other day...

222
00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:50,137
Mr. Wainwright
asked me which
of my reporters

223
00:12:50,203 --> 00:12:52,572
showed the
most potential.

224
00:12:52,639 --> 00:12:55,408
And in a very weak moment
I mentioned your name.

225
00:12:57,644 --> 00:13:00,647
Yes, he wants to meet you,
so he's joining us for lunch.

226
00:13:00,713 --> 00:13:03,050
Be at the restaurant
at 1:00.

227
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:05,485
I'm meeting the publisher?
Mr. Bainwright?

228
00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:06,686
I mean Mr. Wainwright.

229
00:13:06,753 --> 00:13:10,523
I hope I get
his name right.

230
00:13:11,859 --> 00:13:13,426
Appleton, you're babbling.

231
00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:14,794
LARRY: Yes, sir.

232
00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:23,170
Balki, did you hear that?

233
00:13:23,236 --> 00:13:25,172
Well, of course I heard it,
I was standing right here.

234
00:13:25,238 --> 00:13:27,240
Balki, take these off.
Okay.

235
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:30,743
Hurry.
Okay.

236
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:33,180
I can do it quick...
Cousin, I know how do it.

237
00:13:35,782 --> 00:13:37,484
The key broke.

238
00:13:40,253 --> 00:13:43,390
Well, now you've done it.

239
00:14:00,908 --> 00:14:03,310
Hello, I am Marcel,
your maitre d'.

240
00:14:03,376 --> 00:14:05,612
I'm Larry Appleton,
I'm with the Burns' party.

241
00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:07,047
I'll check on your table.

242
00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:09,616
Uh, perhaps you would like
to look at our menu?

243
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:15,422
Thank you.

244
00:14:19,893 --> 00:14:21,528
Balki, we're in luck.

245
00:14:21,594 --> 00:14:23,663
Mr. Burns
and Mr. Wainwright
aren't here yet.

246
00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:26,666
We'll sit at tables
that are next to each other.

247
00:14:26,733 --> 00:14:28,001
If we keep our hands
out of sight

248
00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:30,103
no one will know
we're handcuffed.

249
00:14:30,737 --> 00:14:32,639
Ah! Mr. Burns?

250
00:14:36,043 --> 00:14:38,178
This way, sir.
I'll be with you
in a moment.

251
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:46,453
We're not together,
but we'd like
to sit near each other.

252
00:14:51,158 --> 00:14:53,893
We get lonely easily.

253
00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:57,797
Of course.

254
00:14:57,864 --> 00:14:59,799
Here are two tables.

255
00:14:59,866 --> 00:15:01,501
Are they close enough?

256
00:15:01,568 --> 00:15:03,303
Yes, this is fine.

257
00:15:14,247 --> 00:15:23,423
I think things
are going well,
don't you?

258
00:15:23,490 --> 00:15:25,959
Ahem!

259
00:15:26,026 --> 00:15:27,860
R.T., this is
Larry Appleton.

260
00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:30,597
How do you do?

261
00:15:30,663 --> 00:15:32,899
Oh, well.

262
00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:34,867
I always sit in the
no smoking section,
it's healthier.

263
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,569
Ordinarily, I'd agree.

264
00:15:38,838 --> 00:15:42,275
Uh, but while I was
waiting for you I had
a chance to study

265
00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:46,546
the air currents wafting,
wafting through the room.

266
00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:48,448
And I noticed
that the smoke
is being blown

267
00:15:48,515 --> 00:15:50,950
directly into
the no smoking area.

268
00:15:51,018 --> 00:15:53,386
So, that while it may seem
that the no smoking section

269
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:56,389
is healthier than
the smoking section,
the truth is...

270
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,058
Appleton, you're babbling.

271
00:15:58,125 --> 00:15:59,459
Yes, sir.

272
00:16:00,627 --> 00:16:02,662
Why don't we sit
at another table?

273
00:16:03,997 --> 00:16:05,832
First time in
a restaurant, Appleton?

274
00:16:05,898 --> 00:16:07,200
Pull yourself together!

275
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:11,604
Oh.

276
00:16:16,443 --> 00:16:18,411
You know,
I think you handled
that rather well.

277
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:19,679
Thank you.

278
00:16:19,746 --> 00:16:21,614
All right, I'll sit there,
you sit there, come on.

279
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:24,984
Oh! There's
somebody sitting
at that table!

280
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:30,923
Uh, sorry about that
air current thing,

281
00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:32,992
it's just that I'm so
nervous about meeting

282
00:16:33,060 --> 00:16:34,361
the paplisher of the publer.

283
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:35,828
The peeblisher of the pobler.

284
00:16:35,895 --> 00:16:37,864
The publisher
of the paper.

285
00:16:37,930 --> 00:16:39,466
Is it getting warm in here?

286
00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:42,001
Appleton, will you
for God's sake sit down!

287
00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:43,470
Yes, sir.

288
00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:48,408
Hello.

289
00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:52,879
Oh, Mrs. Van Wisser.

290
00:16:52,945 --> 00:16:56,516
Young man,
are you being paid
to destroy me?

291
00:16:58,451 --> 00:17:01,854
If you aren't
out of here
in ten seconds,

292
00:17:01,921 --> 00:17:03,790
I am calling the police.

293
00:17:08,961 --> 00:17:11,064
Excuse me for
just one moment.

294
00:17:12,099 --> 00:17:15,068
So, Larry, tell me

295
00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:18,671
Well, an interesting story.
I started out
as a photographer...

296
00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:19,772
Wo...

297
00:17:23,343 --> 00:17:25,712
Cousin, I've got to
talk to you.

298
00:17:25,778 --> 00:17:27,314
Balki, not now.

299
00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:29,849
Appleton,
what are you doing?

300
00:17:29,916 --> 00:17:32,152
I dropped a contact lens.

301
00:17:33,286 --> 00:17:35,388
Cousin, I'm sitting
with Mrs. Van Wisser

302
00:17:35,455 --> 00:17:40,093
and she has made it
very clear that she
wants to dine alone.

303
00:17:41,794 --> 00:17:43,696
Cousin, I've got to
get out of here.

304
00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:47,334
Balki, you can't.
Yes, I can.

305
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:48,668
Sorry, I just
thought that...

306
00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:50,503
Oh, ah!
I'll, I'll be right back.

307
00:17:52,705 --> 00:17:56,476
What are you doing?

308
00:17:56,543 --> 00:17:58,211
Mrs. Van Wisser
will call the police!

309
00:17:58,278 --> 00:17:59,579
Balki, if I don't
go back
to that table

310
00:17:59,646 --> 00:18:01,181
I'm going to
lose my job!

311
00:18:03,816 --> 00:18:05,084
No, no.

312
00:18:05,152 --> 00:18:08,121
Uh, I was just looking
for a chair for my friend.

313
00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:09,556
Oh!
Here's one.

314
00:18:11,391 --> 00:18:13,460
Come on.
Just follow my lead.

315
00:18:19,632 --> 00:18:20,867
BOTH: Hi!

316
00:18:23,670 --> 00:18:27,540
Hi?

317
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:28,541
Small world.

318
00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:30,177
I thought I saw
my cousin Balki

319
00:18:30,243 --> 00:18:32,111
and, well,
sure enough I did.

320
00:18:32,179 --> 00:18:33,746
Big deal, you work together.

321
00:18:33,813 --> 00:18:36,216
Yes, but he is such
an interesting man

322
00:18:36,283 --> 00:18:38,951
that if he's gone for
more than a minute,
your life gets boring.

323
00:18:40,353 --> 00:18:42,689
Uh, Mr. Wainwright,
Balki Bartokomous.

324
00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:44,324
A pleasure.

325
00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:51,698
Balki's from Mypos.

326
00:18:51,764 --> 00:18:53,766
An ambidextrous island.

327
00:18:59,672 --> 00:19:01,107
But, uh, where are
our manners?

328
00:19:01,174 --> 00:19:02,942
Uh, Balki,
won't you join us?

329
00:19:03,009 --> 00:19:04,711
Oh, I couldn't possibly.
Oh, please.

330
00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:06,112
Oh, no, absolutely
out of the question.

331
00:19:06,179 --> 00:19:08,515
Oh, you must.

332
00:19:08,581 --> 00:19:10,250
I insist.
Well, just this once.

333
00:19:19,859 --> 00:19:21,928
Just where is Mypos,
Mr. Bartokomous?

334
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,697
Well, it's in
the Southeastern
Mediterranean.

335
00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:32,138
That's funny, I thought
I knew all the islands

336
00:19:32,205 --> 00:19:35,041
Well, um,
Mypos is very small.

337
00:19:35,107 --> 00:19:37,777
During the war it was used
for target practice.

338
00:19:39,612 --> 00:19:41,848
Would you like some food
of your own, Bartokomous?

339
00:19:41,914 --> 00:19:43,350
Oh, no, no, no.

340
00:19:43,416 --> 00:19:45,485
This is fine! So full.
This is fine.

341
00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:47,787
Oh, well, we enjoy
doing things together.

342
00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:51,458
Did I mention
that we're cousins?

343
00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:56,896
Were your parents
cousins, too?

344
00:20:03,503 --> 00:20:05,605
Is there something
wrong with your
left hand, young man?

345
00:20:05,672 --> 00:20:07,139
I notice you don't
use it at all.

346
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:09,709
No, no, I just...
I like to save it

347
00:20:09,776 --> 00:20:12,245
for emergencies.

348
00:20:15,081 --> 00:20:16,649
Emergencies?
Yes.

349
00:20:18,851 --> 00:20:19,952
Of course.

350
00:20:22,822 --> 00:20:26,826
But enough about me!

351
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,528
Uh, more bread,
Mr. Wainwright?

352
00:20:28,595 --> 00:20:30,730
Ooh! Oh,
I'm so sorry.

353
00:20:30,797 --> 00:20:32,699
I, I, I...

354
00:20:32,765 --> 00:20:36,569
Appleton, you'd better
have a good explanation
for this!

355
00:20:36,636 --> 00:20:38,638
Oh! Oh! Eh... Explanation!

356
00:20:38,705 --> 00:20:41,741
Oh, you dood I be.
You di dee boo.
You bet I do.

357
00:20:43,142 --> 00:20:44,511
This... This could happen
to anyone.

358
00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:49,582
It happened to me.
It happened to him.

359
00:20:49,649 --> 00:20:52,752
Cousin, you're babbling.

360
00:20:52,819 --> 00:20:54,987
Well, nip feedle stip net.

361
00:21:11,237 --> 00:21:16,242
So, what could I do?

362
00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:21,381
Well, it's a great pleasure
to meet you boys.

363
00:21:25,452 --> 00:21:29,722
Oh, you were right, Harry.

364
00:21:32,559 --> 00:21:35,562
Appleton, I hope
you realize
you're very lucky!

365
00:21:35,628 --> 00:21:38,865
Yes, yes, sir,
I, I know, sir. I know.
I, I...

366
00:21:42,101 --> 00:21:45,672
Mmm, we're lucky
we didn't have
to go to the men's room.

367
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:48,708
Good point.

368
00:21:50,443 --> 00:21:52,044
Cousin.
What?

369
00:21:52,111 --> 00:21:53,713
I got to say something.

370
00:21:55,482 --> 00:21:56,583
None of this
would have happened if...

371
00:21:56,649 --> 00:22:01,954
I know.
Cousin...

372
00:22:02,021 --> 00:22:04,190
None of this
would have...
I know.

373
00:22:04,256 --> 00:22:07,326
You're going to say
that none of this
would have happened

374
00:22:07,394 --> 00:22:09,862
if I had talked to you
when I was angry.

375
00:22:11,097 --> 00:22:13,700
I was wrong,
and I'm sorry.

376
00:22:13,766 --> 00:22:16,536
Oh, cousin,
that's very nice.

377
00:22:16,603 --> 00:22:18,705
That isn't actually
what I was going to say.

378
00:22:21,307 --> 00:22:23,142
What I was going
to say is

379
00:22:23,209 --> 00:22:25,812
none of this would
have happened if I had
just been patient

380
00:22:25,878 --> 00:22:28,915
and waited for you to find
a time to talk to me.

381
00:22:28,981 --> 00:22:31,951
I was just
trying to follow
my Myposian proverb.

382
00:22:33,986 --> 00:22:37,990
Well, Balki, nobody enjoys
a good Myposian proverb
more than I do.

383
00:22:39,859 --> 00:22:43,530
But life is a little
more complicated in America.

384
00:22:43,596 --> 00:22:45,998
You might
have to adjust
your proverbs.

385
00:22:46,065 --> 00:22:49,201
Well, I guess
they could use
some fine-tuning.

386
00:22:49,268 --> 00:22:52,972
You know, on Mypos
when we say we have
to talk right now,

387
00:22:53,039 --> 00:22:55,141
it's not so much
a problem

388
00:22:55,207 --> 00:22:58,945
because there's really
nothing else to do.

389
00:23:02,181 --> 00:23:03,950
How was your lunch?

390
00:23:04,016 --> 00:23:05,452
What happened?

391
00:23:05,518 --> 00:23:08,721
You two guys
look like Tony Curtis
and Sidney Poitier.

392
00:23:10,289 --> 00:23:13,092
Well, actually,
you both look
like Tony Curtis.

393
00:23:15,728 --> 00:23:17,229
Oh, it's a long story.

394
00:23:17,296 --> 00:23:18,698
Have you seen Jimmy?

395
00:23:18,765 --> 00:23:20,533
Maybe he's got
another key
to these things.

396
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:22,869
Oh, sure I have.
He went to the hospital.

397
00:23:22,935 --> 00:23:24,637
His wife is
having a baby.

398
00:23:29,108 --> 00:23:31,143
BOTH: Ohh...