1 00:00:01,533 --> 00:00:03,066 [theme song] 2 00:00:04,666 --> 00:00:08,333 ♪ Sometimes the world looks perfect ♪ 3 00:00:08,366 --> 00:00:10,766 ♪ Nothing to rearrange ♪ 4 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:13,666 ♪ Sometimes you just get a feeling ♪ 5 00:00:13,700 --> 00:00:17,500 ♪ Like you need some kind of change ♪ 6 00:00:17,533 --> 00:00:20,333 ♪ Standing tall ♪ 7 00:00:20,366 --> 00:00:24,166 ♪ On the wings of my dream ♪ 8 00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:27,133 ♪ Rise and fall ♪ 9 00:00:27,166 --> 00:00:30,766 ♪ On the wings of my dream ♪ 10 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:34,100 ♪ The rain and thunder the wind and haze ♪ 11 00:00:34,133 --> 00:00:37,600 ♪ I'm bound for better days ♪ 12 00:00:37,633 --> 00:00:41,200 ♪ It's my life and my dream ♪ 13 00:00:41,233 --> 00:00:44,433 ♪ Nothing's gonna to stop me now ♪ 14 00:00:51,433 --> 00:00:54,166 [instrumental music] 15 00:00:58,433 --> 00:01:00,600 Harriette, Harriette, come over and look. 16 00:01:00,633 --> 00:01:03,300 The‐the Christmas present my mother sent me from Mypos. 17 00:01:03,333 --> 00:01:05,633 ‐ Let me see. Let me see. ‐ Got it today. 18 00:01:05,666 --> 00:01:06,633 [all gasping] 19 00:01:06,666 --> 00:01:10,066 Oh, Balki, it's beautiful. 20 00:01:10,100 --> 00:01:11,400 Is it hand carved? 21 00:01:11,433 --> 00:01:14,133 Yeah, yeah. It's a Davros cup. 22 00:01:14,166 --> 00:01:16,766 It's made by the finest artist on Mypos. 23 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:18,533 Davros Praxiteles. 24 00:01:18,566 --> 00:01:21,433 Look at the detail on it. 25 00:01:21,466 --> 00:01:25,600 It take him one year just to carve one cup. 26 00:01:25,633 --> 00:01:28,100 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. What is this? 27 00:01:28,133 --> 00:01:30,266 Just because it's Christmas Eve 28 00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:31,700 doesn't mean we're not still workin' here. 29 00:01:31,733 --> 00:01:33,800 Come on. Clear the area. Let's go. Come on. 30 00:01:33,833 --> 00:01:36,200 ‐ Mr‐Mr. Gorpley, Mr. Gorpley. ‐ What? 31 00:01:36,233 --> 00:01:39,333 Look, the beautiful cup my mother send me for Christmas. 32 00:01:39,366 --> 00:01:41,633 I know, I heard. Your mother loves you. 33 00:01:41,666 --> 00:01:43,566 She gave you a present. I'm all choked up. 34 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:45,566 [grunts] 35 00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:48,133 Bartokomous, what are you doing? 36 00:01:48,166 --> 00:01:49,000 You said you were choking. 37 00:01:49,033 --> 00:01:51,100 I'm giving you the ham hock maneuver. 38 00:01:53,700 --> 00:01:55,266 I'm over it. 39 00:01:58,500 --> 00:01:59,366 [panting] 40 00:02:01,100 --> 00:02:02,800 Cousin, cousin. 41 00:02:02,833 --> 00:02:06,533 What? What? Were you mugged? 42 00:02:06,566 --> 00:02:09,233 Worse. I went shopping on Christmas Eve. 43 00:02:10,766 --> 00:02:12,233 'It's a madhouse out there.' 44 00:02:14,666 --> 00:02:17,200 Look at this, huh? 45 00:02:19,100 --> 00:02:20,233 What do you think? 46 00:02:20,266 --> 00:02:21,766 Well, I don't know. 47 00:02:24,300 --> 00:02:26,700 I think it's a little busy for you. 48 00:02:28,266 --> 00:02:31,466 No, no, it's not for me. 49 00:02:31,500 --> 00:02:33,233 It's for Jennifer. 50 00:02:33,266 --> 00:02:37,533 Oh! Well. 51 00:02:37,566 --> 00:02:41,300 In that case, it's quietly elegant. 52 00:02:41,333 --> 00:02:43,766 Cost me a $125, but it's worth it. 53 00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:46,066 I'm gonna give it to Jennifer at our party tonight. 54 00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:47,400 'And just between you and me' 55 00:02:47,433 --> 00:02:50,633 I think she's gonna be thrilled. 56 00:02:50,666 --> 00:02:53,766 So, you're, uh, having a little Christmas party 57 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:56,200 tonight, eh, Appleton? 58 00:02:56,233 --> 00:03:00,700 A party? Uh, well, no. We're not having a party. 59 00:03:00,733 --> 00:03:05,733 I‐I wouldn't call it a party...as such. 60 00:03:05,766 --> 00:03:09,066 You know, just a few‐few people getting together 61 00:03:09,100 --> 00:03:11,100 and killing time. 62 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:14,366 I'll have watch that on 63 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:16,466 "Lifestyles Of The Rich And Boring." 64 00:03:21,500 --> 00:03:24,466 You didn't ask Mr. Gorpley to the party? 65 00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:26,533 No, I didn't ask Mr. Gorpley to the party. 66 00:03:26,566 --> 00:03:29,066 Well, why not? He's gonna feel left out. 67 00:03:29,100 --> 00:03:30,266 He is left out. 68 00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:36,100 Balki, this is our first annual Christmas party. 69 00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:39,633 I want it to be a time for all our friends to gather together 70 00:03:39,666 --> 00:03:43,066 and share an evening filled with Christmas spirit. 71 00:03:43,100 --> 00:03:45,600 If Mr. Gorpley came, he'd ruin everything. 72 00:03:45,633 --> 00:03:48,433 Oh, come on. How can you say that? 73 00:03:48,466 --> 00:03:52,233 It's easy. "He'd ruin everything." 74 00:03:52,266 --> 00:03:55,233 I don't want him at the party. 75 00:03:57,200 --> 00:03:59,733 [instrumental music] 76 00:04:06,100 --> 00:04:07,633 Great news. 77 00:04:07,666 --> 00:04:11,200 I'm free to spend Christmas with you. 78 00:04:11,233 --> 00:04:12,666 What do you mean, "so what"? 79 00:04:14,566 --> 00:04:16,333 No. I didn't ask my wife. 80 00:04:16,366 --> 00:04:17,533 But I have a hunch 81 00:04:17,566 --> 00:04:19,533 she doesn't wanna spend Christmas with me. 82 00:04:19,566 --> 00:04:21,333 She's been remarried for two years. 83 00:04:23,633 --> 00:04:24,400 'So how about it?' 84 00:04:25,666 --> 00:04:27,400 Can I come over for Christmas? 85 00:04:29,233 --> 00:04:32,166 No. No, I understand. 86 00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:35,766 D‐uh, no, you've got family coming over. 87 00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:38,266 Yeah, okay, I'll try you again next year. 88 00:04:38,833 --> 00:04:41,233 Yeah. Bye, mom. 89 00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:49,766 ‐ Mr. Gorpley‐‐ ‐ Dah! What? 90 00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:53,133 Oh, ah, Bartokomous. 91 00:04:53,166 --> 00:04:56,133 About tonight, cousin Larry and I ha‐ha.. 92 00:04:59,166 --> 00:05:03,133 Cousin Larry and I ha‐ha.. 93 00:05:03,166 --> 00:05:06,133 Cousin Larry and I are ha‐ha.. 94 00:05:06,166 --> 00:05:08,066 What is the matter, Bartokomous? 95 00:05:08,100 --> 00:05:09,533 You got tinsel caught in your throat? 96 00:05:11,700 --> 00:05:14,533 No, I was wondering. Do you have a place to go for Christmas Eve? 97 00:05:14,566 --> 00:05:17,566 [scoffs] Me? Sam "The Man" Gorpley? 98 00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:19,666 I got invitations runnin' out my ears. 99 00:05:19,700 --> 00:05:21,700 Do I have any place to go for Christmas? 100 00:05:21,733 --> 00:05:22,800 What a laugh. 101 00:05:22,833 --> 00:05:25,766 [laughing] 102 00:05:28,233 --> 00:05:31,366 Oh, boy! Oh, boy! What a relief. 103 00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:32,433 I'll tell you, I'll tell you. 104 00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:34,133 ‐ Funny, funny thing. ‐ What? 105 00:05:34,166 --> 00:05:36,533 Uh, for a, for a second over there 106 00:05:36,566 --> 00:05:40,400 uh, well, I was going to‐to ask you 107 00:05:40,433 --> 00:05:42,166 if you wanted to come to our party. 108 00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:43,366 Okay. 109 00:05:45,700 --> 00:05:47,166 Okay? What? 110 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:49,800 Okay, I'll come to your party. 111 00:05:49,833 --> 00:05:52,100 You will? 112 00:05:52,133 --> 00:05:54,800 Yes, I will see you tonight. 113 00:05:54,833 --> 00:05:57,266 ‐ Okay? ‐ Okay. 114 00:05:58,333 --> 00:06:00,066 Okay! 115 00:06:01,666 --> 00:06:05,033 Okay.. 116 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:11,200 [instrumental music] 117 00:06:29,500 --> 00:06:30,500 Perfect. 118 00:06:35,533 --> 00:06:37,100 Okay. 119 00:06:37,500 --> 00:06:39,133 Balki... 120 00:06:39,166 --> 00:06:41,166 Would you look at this? 121 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:46,466 Is this gonna be a perfect Christmas party or what? 122 00:06:46,500 --> 00:06:47,500 Wow. 123 00:06:49,233 --> 00:06:51,266 Alright, now, the guests will be coming any minute. 124 00:06:51,300 --> 00:06:53,433 I want you to try the eggnog. 125 00:06:53,466 --> 00:06:57,100 Tell me if it's okay, huh? 126 00:07:01,166 --> 00:07:04,100 Mmm. Perfect. 127 00:07:07,300 --> 00:07:09,666 It is, isn't it? 128 00:07:09,700 --> 00:07:14,200 Cousin, a funny, funny thing happened 129 00:07:14,233 --> 00:07:18,233 while I was...um, taking down the decorations at work. 130 00:07:18,266 --> 00:07:19,300 [gasps] 131 00:07:19,333 --> 00:07:21,233 Napkins. 132 00:07:21,266 --> 00:07:24,366 Um, I was, it‐it all kind of.. 133 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,033 I was just finishing 134 00:07:26,066 --> 00:07:28,466 uh, taking down the decorations for Mr. Gorpley‐‐ 135 00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:31,600 You know, I knew Gorpley was slime. 136 00:07:31,633 --> 00:07:33,366 But making you work late on Christmas Eve 137 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:35,633 is a new low, even for him. 138 00:07:39,700 --> 00:07:40,566 What do you think? What do you think? 139 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:42,133 Should I add another log? 140 00:07:42,166 --> 00:07:45,500 I mean, here, I want, I want people to be warm 141 00:07:45,533 --> 00:07:47,266 but I don't want them to sweat. 142 00:07:55,666 --> 00:07:57,400 (together) Perfect. 143 00:08:00,333 --> 00:08:05,233 Balki...it doesn't get any better than this. 144 00:08:07,066 --> 00:08:09,366 Well, we gotta talk about that. 145 00:08:13,333 --> 00:08:15,400 What could be better than a party at Christmas 146 00:08:15,433 --> 00:08:17,133 with the people you care about? 147 00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:19,300 How about this? 148 00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:21,700 How about inviting someone to that party 149 00:08:21,733 --> 00:08:24,200 who is, who is less fortunate than you are? 150 00:08:26,166 --> 00:08:29,700 ‐ Great idea. ‐ Really? 151 00:08:29,733 --> 00:08:32,233 We'll have to remember to do that next year. 152 00:08:32,266 --> 00:08:34,333 Well, cousin, cousin 153 00:08:34,366 --> 00:08:36,300 I took it upon myself to do it this year. 154 00:08:37,566 --> 00:08:40,100 ‐ You did? ‐ Yeah. 155 00:08:40,133 --> 00:08:42,500 Well, you are incredible. 156 00:08:42,533 --> 00:08:45,333 Well, you don't know the half of it. 157 00:08:49,700 --> 00:08:51,366 Well, so who is it? 158 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:54,633 Where did you find this unfortunate person? 159 00:08:54,666 --> 00:08:58,633 Well, to answer the second question first 160 00:08:58,666 --> 00:09:02,033 um, I met him down at the paper. 161 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:08,266 Beautiful. 162 00:09:10,433 --> 00:09:13,066 Who is it? 163 00:09:13,100 --> 00:09:14,466 You know what? 164 00:09:14,500 --> 00:09:18,500 This is the best eggnog I have ever had anywhere. 165 00:09:21,766 --> 00:09:23,200 Seconds? 166 00:09:25,533 --> 00:09:27,400 Who is it? 167 00:09:27,433 --> 00:09:30,766 [chuckles] Who is whom? 168 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:32,500 Who is coming to our party? 169 00:09:32,533 --> 00:09:35,300 ‐ What party? When? ‐ The Christmas party. 170 00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:39,066 The Christmas party we are having here tonight! 171 00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:42,200 Oh, that Christmas party. 172 00:09:42,233 --> 00:09:43,400 What was the question? 173 00:09:43,433 --> 00:09:45,533 [knocking on door] 174 00:09:45,566 --> 00:09:48,066 Oh, goodness, that might be Mr. Gorpley now. 175 00:09:51,066 --> 00:09:54,000 [instrumental music] 176 00:09:58,433 --> 00:10:00,566 [instrumental music] 177 00:10:03,566 --> 00:10:05,166 [knocking on door] 178 00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:08,366 You invited Mr. Gorpley? 179 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:10,100 Are you crazy? 180 00:10:10,133 --> 00:10:13,233 I specifically said I did not want him at the party. 181 00:10:21,066 --> 00:10:23,700 Well, you also said that you thought the Christmas party 182 00:10:23,733 --> 00:10:26,200 would be a time when all your friends would gather 'round 183 00:10:26,233 --> 00:10:28,266 and share the Christmas spirit. 184 00:10:28,300 --> 00:10:29,366 He is not my friend. 185 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:31,333 Well he is my friend. 186 00:10:31,366 --> 00:10:35,700 And‐ and it's my party too, and I'm going to let him in. 187 00:10:40,533 --> 00:10:42,100 I am not going let Mr. Gorpley ruin 188 00:10:42,133 --> 00:10:44,233 the best Christmas party of all time. 189 00:10:44,266 --> 00:10:45,600 Hah! Let me.. 190 00:10:48,166 --> 00:10:51,433 [speaking in Danish accent] Yah, who is there? 191 00:10:51,466 --> 00:10:54,400 (Harriette) 'It's Harriette and I'm ready to party.' 192 00:10:54,433 --> 00:10:55,400 It's Harriette. 193 00:10:55,433 --> 00:10:56,400 (together) Oh! 194 00:10:56,433 --> 00:10:58,166 [chuckles] Harriette. 195 00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,200 Come on in. Merry Christmas. 196 00:11:01,233 --> 00:11:02,366 [indistinct chattering] 197 00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:04,566 ‐ Hi, nice to see you. ‐ Come on in. 198 00:11:06,733 --> 00:11:08,366 Everybody just throw your coats off 199 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:10,233 and put your presents down. 200 00:11:10,266 --> 00:11:11,800 And go help yourselves to some eggnog. 201 00:11:11,833 --> 00:11:14,200 And let us know if there's too much nog. 202 00:11:14,233 --> 00:11:15,200 [knocking on door] 203 00:11:15,233 --> 00:11:17,500 Shh. 204 00:11:17,533 --> 00:11:18,433 Cousin.. 205 00:11:20,766 --> 00:11:24,733 [speaking in Spanish accent] Hola. Who is it? 206 00:11:26,333 --> 00:11:29,566 (Lydia) 'Ramone? Is that you?' 207 00:11:30,566 --> 00:11:31,733 It's Lydia. 208 00:11:31,766 --> 00:11:35,066 ‐ Oh! ‐ It's Lydia. 209 00:11:35,100 --> 00:11:37,400 Come on in. 210 00:11:37,433 --> 00:11:41,066 Ooh! Larry. Muy macho. 211 00:11:42,133 --> 00:11:43,133 Feliz navidad. 212 00:11:43,166 --> 00:11:44,700 [laughs] 213 00:11:44,733 --> 00:11:46,533 Lydia, Lydia, so good to see you. 214 00:11:46,566 --> 00:11:49,666 Come, sit down. Take off your wrap. 215 00:11:49,700 --> 00:11:52,066 Thank heavens! Now, sit down.. 216 00:11:52,100 --> 00:11:53,300 [knocking on door] 217 00:11:53,333 --> 00:11:54,766 Shh. 218 00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,766 Cousin, would you.. 219 00:11:59,666 --> 00:12:02,466 [speaking in British accent] And who might that be? 220 00:12:02,500 --> 00:12:05,300 (Mary Anne) 'Oh, sorry, we must have the wrong apartment.' 221 00:12:05,333 --> 00:12:06,700 No, no, no, it's Mary Anne. 222 00:12:06,733 --> 00:12:09,733 ‐ Oh. ‐ Mary Anne. 223 00:12:09,766 --> 00:12:12,333 Hi, Jennifer, come on in. 224 00:12:12,366 --> 00:12:15,033 Merry Christmas. You look...beautiful. 225 00:12:15,066 --> 00:12:15,800 ‐ What's this? ‐ Mwah.. 226 00:12:15,833 --> 00:12:17,033 ‐ Hey, come on.. ‐ Oh. 227 00:12:19,100 --> 00:12:20,466 Come on in. 228 00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:24,500 Balki, what is going on? 229 00:12:24,533 --> 00:12:27,433 Well, cousin Larry's having a nervous break dance. 230 00:12:27,466 --> 00:12:29,333 Because.. 231 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:34,100 ...just because I invited someone to the party 232 00:12:34,133 --> 00:12:37,033 who is a little less fortunate than we are. 233 00:12:37,066 --> 00:12:39,566 Huh, real classy, Larry. 234 00:12:43,533 --> 00:12:44,766 Well, that's very nice, Balki. 235 00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:46,433 Now what's this guy's name? 236 00:12:46,466 --> 00:12:48,166 ‐ Mr. Gorpley. ‐ Goodnight everybody. 237 00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:49,700 [clamoring] 238 00:12:49,733 --> 00:12:52,300 Wait, wait, wait, wait. 239 00:12:52,333 --> 00:12:55,433 Now, just because he's invited 240 00:12:55,466 --> 00:12:58,133 doesn't mean we have to let him in. 241 00:12:59,733 --> 00:13:02,066 When he knocks on the door, we'll all be quiet 242 00:13:02,100 --> 00:13:04,666 and he'll think he's got the wrong apartment. 243 00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:07,300 I can't believe this. No one can be that bad. 244 00:13:07,333 --> 00:13:08,733 The man's a sleaze ball. 245 00:13:08,766 --> 00:13:11,066 [clamoring] 246 00:13:11,100 --> 00:13:14,300 Okay, okay, okay, okay. 247 00:13:14,333 --> 00:13:16,633 Mr. Gorpley is not popular. 248 00:13:16,666 --> 00:13:18,333 I get that. 249 00:13:18,366 --> 00:13:20,733 And I'm in an okay place about it. 250 00:13:22,233 --> 00:13:24,466 But let me just say this. 251 00:13:24,500 --> 00:13:26,700 I invited him to this house 252 00:13:26,733 --> 00:13:29,666 and when he comes here, I'm going to let him in. 253 00:13:29,700 --> 00:13:30,666 [knocking on door] 254 00:13:30,700 --> 00:13:31,500 Shh. 255 00:13:31,533 --> 00:13:34,800 (Mr. Gorpley) 'Bartokomous, Appleton?' 256 00:13:34,833 --> 00:13:35,700 Oh, what the.. 257 00:13:38,433 --> 00:13:39,533 (Mr. Gorpley) 'I know you're in there.' 258 00:13:39,566 --> 00:13:43,366 'This has happened before, you know.' 259 00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:45,533 This happened last year at Lydia's birthday party. 260 00:13:45,566 --> 00:13:47,233 We tried to outwait him. 261 00:13:47,266 --> 00:13:49,166 We sat in the dark for four hours 262 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:51,333 listening to the man pound on the door. 263 00:13:51,366 --> 00:13:52,766 (Mr. Gorpley) 'It was five hours, 264 00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:55,400 and I brought a sleeping bag this time.' 265 00:13:58,733 --> 00:14:01,166 I guess we're gonna have to let him in. 266 00:14:06,166 --> 00:14:07,600 Well, now I'm disheveled. 267 00:14:10,833 --> 00:14:12,300 Now look, everyone. 268 00:14:12,333 --> 00:14:14,133 You're gonna see that I'm right. 269 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:18,100 Deep down inside Mr. Gorpley 270 00:14:18,133 --> 00:14:21,400 there is an ember of the Christmas spirit. 271 00:14:21,433 --> 00:14:23,766 And if we just treat him with some kindness 272 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,200 I think we can fan it into a flame. 273 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:29,466 Good. I'll get the matches. 274 00:14:33,300 --> 00:14:35,333 Harriette, you don't mean that. 275 00:14:35,366 --> 00:14:38,466 Now, look, how about when we open the door 276 00:14:38,500 --> 00:14:41,466 we give him a really beautiful "Merry Christmas"? 277 00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:43,100 A really good one. 278 00:14:46,333 --> 00:14:49,300 (all) Merry Christmas! 279 00:14:49,333 --> 00:14:52,266 Mmm, how festive. 280 00:14:52,300 --> 00:14:54,066 Looks like Kris Kringle threw up 281 00:14:54,100 --> 00:14:55,400 all over your living room. 282 00:15:03,666 --> 00:15:06,600 [instrumental music] 283 00:15:11,166 --> 00:15:13,300 Having a good time, Mr. Gorpley? 284 00:15:13,333 --> 00:15:15,633 Mmm, better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. 285 00:15:15,666 --> 00:15:17,133 [laughs] 286 00:15:20,133 --> 00:15:23,533 Ho‐ho‐ho. 287 00:15:23,566 --> 00:15:27,266 Merry Christmas. It's Balki Claus. 288 00:15:31,400 --> 00:15:33,433 It's present time. Present time. 289 00:15:33,466 --> 00:15:36,300 [all cheering] 290 00:15:36,333 --> 00:15:39,133 You must have all been good little boys and girls 291 00:15:39,166 --> 00:15:43,233 because...Balki Claus has presents for all of you. 292 00:15:43,266 --> 00:15:44,233 [all laughing] 293 00:15:44,266 --> 00:15:46,400 'Okay.' 294 00:15:46,433 --> 00:15:49,233 This one is for Harriette from Lydia. 295 00:15:49,266 --> 00:15:51,800 (all) Open it. 296 00:15:51,833 --> 00:15:53,733 Alright, alright. Hang on, hang on, hang on. 297 00:15:53,766 --> 00:15:56,100 Let's check, let's check it out. 298 00:15:56,133 --> 00:16:01,033 ‐ Oh, thank you. ‐ That's real nice, Lydia. 299 00:16:01,066 --> 00:16:03,466 They're givin' 'em away at the gas station with every fill up. 300 00:16:11,500 --> 00:16:14,500 This one is "To Lydia from Harriette." 301 00:16:14,533 --> 00:16:19,333 (all) Open it. Open it. Open it. 302 00:16:19,366 --> 00:16:21,166 Oh, it's the new 303 00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:23,600 "Nora True Blood Adam's Mystery." 304 00:16:23,633 --> 00:16:26,300 ‐ I've been dying to read this. ‐ I know. I know. 305 00:16:26,333 --> 00:16:28,666 I'll save you 600 pages. The Countess did it. 306 00:16:32,066 --> 00:16:34,433 Why don't we see if he can swallow this side ways! 307 00:16:34,466 --> 00:16:36,800 [clamoring] 308 00:16:36,833 --> 00:16:39,400 Harriette, Harriette, sit down, please. 309 00:16:39,433 --> 00:16:40,600 'Sit down please.' 310 00:16:40,633 --> 00:16:42,600 This is not Geraldo. 311 00:16:49,433 --> 00:16:52,333 Now, let me see here. 312 00:16:52,366 --> 00:16:58,033 This one is "To Jennifer, from Mary Anne, your roommate." 313 00:16:58,066 --> 00:17:00,066 ‐ Oh. ‐ 'Open it.' 314 00:17:00,100 --> 00:17:01,733 Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. 315 00:17:01,766 --> 00:17:07,100 This one is "To Jennifer from Larry." 316 00:17:07,133 --> 00:17:08,766 ‐ 'Open it.' ‐ Open it. 317 00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,633 Wait, wait, wait, open mine first. 318 00:17:16,566 --> 00:17:19,200 [all gasp] 319 00:17:19,233 --> 00:17:20,700 (Jennifer) 'Oh, Mary Anne. This is lovely.' 320 00:17:20,733 --> 00:17:22,666 But this must have cost you a fortune. 321 00:17:22,700 --> 00:17:26,200 It did, $29.95. 322 00:17:26,233 --> 00:17:29,433 Wow. I've seen 'em for a hundred and a quarter. 323 00:17:29,466 --> 00:17:32,100 [laughing] 324 00:17:32,133 --> 00:17:34,166 Why don't you open up the present from Appleton? 325 00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:36,733 ‐ I'm dying to see what that is. ‐ 'Oh.' 326 00:17:36,766 --> 00:17:39,000 This isn't really the‐the time. 327 00:17:41,766 --> 00:17:45,200 Oh, gee, thanks, Larry. 328 00:17:45,233 --> 00:17:48,300 This is, this is really nice. 329 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:51,333 You know, you just can't have too many of these. 330 00:17:52,733 --> 00:17:55,266 Yeah. Good move, Appleton. 331 00:17:55,300 --> 00:17:57,000 Boy, I bet you feel like a real jerk. 332 00:18:02,233 --> 00:18:03,600 Alright, that's it. You're out of here. 333 00:18:03,633 --> 00:18:06,566 [clamoring] 334 00:18:13,600 --> 00:18:14,800 Wait a minute! 335 00:18:14,833 --> 00:18:15,633 Don't you see what's happening? 336 00:18:15,666 --> 00:18:19,166 'Yeah! We're taking out the trash!' 337 00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:29,133 Give him back. Let us have him. 338 00:18:31,333 --> 00:18:36,266 You've turned into a Christmas mob. 339 00:18:36,300 --> 00:18:37,766 Well, he's been askin' for it all night. 340 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:38,566 And we're gonna give it to him. 341 00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:40,333 [clamoring] 342 00:18:40,366 --> 00:18:42,233 Listen to me. 343 00:18:42,266 --> 00:18:44,766 You don't want to hurt anybody. 344 00:18:44,800 --> 00:18:47,133 Especially on Christmas Eve. 345 00:18:49,433 --> 00:18:53,566 Oh, relax, Bartokomous. These people can't hurt me. 346 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:54,700 You think by throwin' me out of here 347 00:18:54,733 --> 00:18:56,366 you're gonna spoil my Christmas? 348 00:18:56,400 --> 00:19:00,433 Hey, I've had rotten Christmas' before. 349 00:19:00,466 --> 00:19:02,133 Like the one, uh, three years ago. 350 00:19:02,166 --> 00:19:03,333 When my wife said 351 00:19:03,366 --> 00:19:05,666 "Merry Christmas. I'm divorcing you." 352 00:19:08,666 --> 00:19:11,700 Or how about that one when I was in high school? 353 00:19:11,733 --> 00:19:15,100 And I finally met my real father. 354 00:19:15,133 --> 00:19:18,566 And he stuck around long enough to have a drumstick 355 00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:22,366 and steal all the money that I had saved for college. 356 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:25,066 Or there was always the one when I was eight 357 00:19:25,100 --> 00:19:28,533 and our trailer burnt down. 358 00:19:28,566 --> 00:19:30,800 No, no, no, wait a minute, wait a minute, no. 359 00:19:30,833 --> 00:19:33,666 That was a good Christmas. 360 00:19:33,700 --> 00:19:36,433 I got to sleep in a real bed.. 361 00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:38,366 ...at the Red Cross. 362 00:19:41,133 --> 00:19:43,633 So don't worry about me getting hurt on Christmas. 363 00:19:43,666 --> 00:19:46,000 It's not going to happen. 364 00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:51,266 But it wouldn't be Christmas if somebody didn't try. 365 00:19:52,666 --> 00:19:54,566 Happy holidays. 366 00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:58,333 No, now, now, that's, that's okay, that's enough. 367 00:19:58,366 --> 00:20:00,766 Come and sit over here. Come and sit down. 368 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:05,466 We, we‐we can't let you go. 369 00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:08,166 We‐we, we haven't finished opening the presents. 370 00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,366 I'm sure you can handle that without me. 371 00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:14,366 No, we can't because, because, uh.. 372 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:16,366 ...one of the presents is for you. 373 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:19,600 Oh, what? Come on. For me, a present? 374 00:20:19,633 --> 00:20:22,266 ‐ Get real, Bartokomous. ‐ I have never been realer. 375 00:20:25,666 --> 00:20:28,200 I believe that this is your name on the tag. 376 00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:32,400 "To Mr. Gorpley. 377 00:20:32,433 --> 00:20:37,100 Have a Merry Christmas. From your friend...Balki" 378 00:20:42,833 --> 00:20:46,033 Open it, open it. 379 00:20:56,366 --> 00:20:59,066 Balki, that was a gift from your mama. 380 00:21:03,433 --> 00:21:06,033 Why are you giving this to me? 381 00:21:06,066 --> 00:21:09,033 I thought it meant a lot to you. 382 00:21:09,066 --> 00:21:11,200 It does mean a lot to me. 383 00:21:11,233 --> 00:21:13,300 It's a gift of love. 384 00:21:13,333 --> 00:21:16,133 And my mother taught me that a gift of love 385 00:21:16,166 --> 00:21:19,433 has to go to the one who needs it the most. 386 00:21:19,466 --> 00:21:21,500 And right now, that's you. 387 00:21:23,266 --> 00:21:25,000 I‐I don't have a gift to you. 388 00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,300 Yes, you do. 389 00:21:28,333 --> 00:21:30,800 If, if you take my gift 390 00:21:30,833 --> 00:21:33,133 then you're giving me a gift. 391 00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:42,133 [instrumental music] 392 00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:46,066 Nothing like this has ever happened to me. 393 00:21:49,433 --> 00:21:50,400 I don't know what to say. 394 00:21:50,433 --> 00:21:53,500 Nobody's ever...given me a gift 395 00:21:53,533 --> 00:21:56,066 that meant something before. 396 00:21:58,366 --> 00:22:00,433 [sighing] 397 00:22:00,466 --> 00:22:03,133 I feel, uh, kind of strange. 398 00:22:04,433 --> 00:22:08,066 Sort of, uh...warm. 399 00:22:11,433 --> 00:22:13,566 Like I'm almost starting to like you people. 400 00:22:16,566 --> 00:22:20,166 What you're feeling is the Christmas spirit. 401 00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:24,766 Do you feel this every Christmas? 402 00:22:24,800 --> 00:22:26,466 Except for Balki. 403 00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:29,066 He feels like this every day. 404 00:22:32,666 --> 00:22:37,366 ‐ Merry Christmas, Mr. Gorpley. ‐ Merry Christmas, Sam. 405 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:38,500 ‐ Merry Christmas. ‐ Merry Christmas. 406 00:22:38,533 --> 00:22:40,633 (all) Merry Christmas. 407 00:22:40,666 --> 00:22:43,633 I'm sorry I tried to lock you out, Mr. Gorpley. 408 00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:48,566 I would have done the same thing in your place. 409 00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:53,033 Uh, M‐Merry Christmas, Appleton. 410 00:22:54,433 --> 00:22:56,066 Merry Christmas. 411 00:22:59,333 --> 00:23:04,500 ♪ Hark the herald angels sing ♪ 412 00:23:04,533 --> 00:23:10,133 ♪ Glory to the newborn king ♪ 413 00:23:10,166 --> 00:23:13,166 ♪ Peace on Earth and mercy mild.. ♪ 414 00:23:15,166 --> 00:23:17,766 ["Hark The Herald Angels Sing" instrumental] 415 00:23:27,300 --> 00:23:29,300 [theme music]