1
00:00:02,068 --> 00:00:03,303
[David Pomeranz performing
"Nothing's Gonna Stop Me Now"]

2
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♪ Sometimes the world
looks perfect ♪

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♪ Nothing to rearrange ♪

4
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♪ Sometimes you just
get a feeling ♪

5
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♪ Like you need
some kind of change ♪

6
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♪ No matter what the odds
are this time ♪

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♪ Nothing's going to stand
in my way ♪

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♪ This flame in my heart ♪

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♪ Like a long lost friend ♪

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♪ Gives every dark street
a light at the end ♪

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♪ Standing tall ♪

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♪ On the wings of my dream ♪

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♪ Rise and fall ♪

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♪ On the wings of my dream ♪

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♪ The rain and thunder
The wind and haze ♪

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♪ I'm bound for better days ♪

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♪ It's my life and my dream ♪

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♪ And nothing's going
to stop me now ♪

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[instrumental music]

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Balki?

21
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Hi, cousin.

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Are you just getting home?

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Well, yes..

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Buh‐bye.

25
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'Balki?'

26
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Were you working all night?

27
00:02:00,587 --> 00:02:02,122
Well. No.

28
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We were...playing poker.

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Buh‐bye.

30
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W‐w‐wait a minute, wait
a minute. Woah, woah, woah.

31
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You were playing poker?

32
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[inhaling]

33
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[laughing]
Yeah.

34
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Funny, funny thing. Um..

35
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I wasn't really
even supposed to play, but..

36
00:02:26,513 --> 00:02:29,583
...but one of the regular
players in‐in Mr. Gorpley's game

37
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:33,453
was sick and‐and Mr. Gorpley
graciously allowed me to sit in.

38
00:02:33,486 --> 00:02:34,721
How much money did you lose?

39
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[sobbing]
Oh, cousin..

40
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What?

41
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[indistinct]

42
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What?

43
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Oh, cousin, I lost $100.

44
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You lost $100!

45
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Cousin, don't yell at me,
I'm feeling...quite vulnerable.

46
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I..

47
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I lost $100.

48
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Balki! Do‐bu‐it's alright.

49
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‐ I'm not mad at you.
‐ You yelled at me.

50
00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:07,420
I am mad at Mr. Gorpley!

51
00:03:07,453 --> 00:03:09,489
I can't can't believe
he took advantage of you.

52
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Well, cousin,
don't get mad at Mr. Gorpley.

53
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It wasn't his fault.
He‐he was trying to help me.

54
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He sat down right next to me
so he could help me

55
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by looking at my cards.

56
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Looking at your cards
is against the rules.

57
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‐ It is?
‐ Yes, it is.

58
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Well, I'll be snookered.

59
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I...I‐I was wondering

60
00:03:31,411 --> 00:03:32,946
why he wouldn't let me
look at his cards.

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You think that's why I lost
each and every hand?

62
00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:40,286
Yes, yes I think so.

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Cousin, you think
if I go to Mr. Gorpley

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and ask him real nice..

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...he'd give me my money back?

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[scoffing]
Balki, you're dreaming

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00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:51,364
I am?

68
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Well, you mean
I didn't play poker all night

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and I didn't lose $100?

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Cousin..

71
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...it seemed so real.

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00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:02,776
Balki, it is real.

73
00:04:02,809 --> 00:04:05,512
What I mean is that Gorpley
is a serious card player.

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00:04:06,813 --> 00:04:08,048
The only way
to get your money back

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00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,350
is to beat him
at his own game.

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00:04:10,383 --> 00:04:13,386
Well, cousin, I'd...I'd love
to get my money back.

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In fact, losing the $100

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was the only part of the game
I‐I didn't enjoy.

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Other than that
it was really a great way

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to experience male bondage.

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Bonding.

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Male bonding.

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Bonding.

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[instrumental music]

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Balki?

86
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Would you come out here please?

87
00:05:05,005 --> 00:05:07,040
Did I catch you at a bad time?

88
00:05:10,577 --> 00:05:12,613
No.

89
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,748
I was just wondering
why you're wearing

90
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your bullet hat.

91
00:05:19,385 --> 00:05:20,787
Oh! Uh..

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I figured out a way to make back
that $100 that I lost.

93
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I'm going to hire myself out
on weekends

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as a human cannonball.

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Balki, forget about that.

96
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It won't be necessary.

97
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:42,743
I told Gorpley we'd play in his
poker game tomorrow night.

98
00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:44,611
I'm going to win
your money back.

99
00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:45,779
Really, cousin?

100
00:05:45,812 --> 00:05:47,380
But‐but you got to be careful.

101
00:05:47,413 --> 00:05:49,616
Mr. Gorpley
is quite the aardvark.

102
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:00,694
Perhaps you mean..

103
00:06:00,727 --> 00:06:02,395
...card shark?

104
00:06:07,568 --> 00:06:10,537
But, Balki, I happen to be..

105
00:06:10,571 --> 00:06:12,639
...a great poker player.

106
00:06:12,673 --> 00:06:17,443
In the poker world, I was known
as Smooth Larry Appleton.

107
00:06:17,477 --> 00:06:19,479
Well, in the goat‐milking world

108
00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:22,749
I was known as Cool Hand Balki.

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Are you going to pay
attention now?

110
00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:39,966
Yes, I‐I am.
I am going to...focus.

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00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,803
First thing I have to do
is teach you how to play poker.

112
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:43,704
I've written down
a few simple rules

113
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so you'll know
how to play your cards.

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As you can see,
two pair beat one pair..

115
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...three of a kind beat
two pair, a full house

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which is three of a kind
and a pair beat three of a kind

117
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:53,113
and four of a kind
beat a full house.

118
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Any questions?

119
00:06:56,683 --> 00:06:57,584
Wow!

120
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You‐you make it all
seem so complicated.

121
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,659
All Mr. Gorpley did was..

122
00:07:05,692 --> 00:07:08,028
...deal me five cards and
we both look at them and..

123
00:07:08,061 --> 00:07:09,830
...he take my money.

124
00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:13,800
Well, this is gonna be
different. Sit down, Balki.

125
00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:18,071
This time..

126
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:20,507
...we are going to take
Gorpley's money.

127
00:07:21,074 --> 00:07:22,743
Now..

128
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,778
It is very important..

129
00:07:24,811 --> 00:07:26,713
...that nobody know..

130
00:07:26,747 --> 00:07:28,815
...what the cards
in your hand are.

131
00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:31,251
Alright?

132
00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:33,920
Watch me first.

133
00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:35,789
I'm picking up my cards.

134
00:07:35,822 --> 00:07:36,957
They may be good.

135
00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:38,525
They may be bad.

136
00:07:38,559 --> 00:07:40,594
I am looking at my cards.

137
00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:42,929
What do you see on my face?

138
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:45,165
There's a tiny little bit
of ketchup right there.

139
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‐ And also a‐‐
‐ Alright, that's enough.

140
00:07:50,771 --> 00:07:51,838
That's enough.

141
00:07:53,740 --> 00:07:55,509
What I mean is..

142
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...your face should not reveal

143
00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:59,245
anything about
the cards in your hand.

144
00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:02,115
That is called having
a poker face. A poker face.

145
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,717
Oh, well, that's a relief!

146
00:08:03,750 --> 00:08:05,619
I thought it meant being hit
in the face with a poker.

147
00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:11,558
[no audio]

148
00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:12,559
Do you want me to win
your money back?

149
00:08:12,593 --> 00:08:15,095
‐ Yes, I do. Yes I do.
‐ Do you? Oh, you do?

150
00:08:15,128 --> 00:08:17,698
‐ Alright, then. Pay attention!
‐ Okay! Okay.

151
00:08:19,065 --> 00:08:20,734
Alright.

152
00:08:20,767 --> 00:08:22,302
Look at your cards.
Remember!

153
00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:24,805
Your face
should not reveal anything

154
00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:26,573
about the cards in your hand.

155
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,307
[gasping]

156
00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:19,626
Good hand?

157
00:09:19,660 --> 00:09:21,194
How did you know?

158
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:25,198
Balki...I don't want to take up

159
00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,067
your whole night
teaching you how to play poker.

160
00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:28,702
No, cousin, I want to know
how to play poker!

161
00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:30,136
‐ Please, cousin!
‐ Alright, alright, alright!

162
00:09:30,170 --> 00:09:31,805
I'll teach you later,
but first..

163
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:33,339
...we are going to go
over the plan.

164
00:09:33,373 --> 00:09:34,374
‐ There's a plan?
‐ Yes!

165
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:35,842
‐ Oh, golly!
‐ Oh..

166
00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:37,978
There...there goes all the fun.

167
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:39,946
Balki, tomorrow night
we play Gorpley.

168
00:09:39,980 --> 00:09:42,783
First, we're going to lose
a few hands on purpose

169
00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:44,685
so he'll think
I'm a beginner too.

170
00:09:44,718 --> 00:09:46,152
Then I'll suggest
that we pool our money

171
00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:47,387
and I play for both of us.

172
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,123
When he agrees to that,
just leave everything to me.

173
00:09:50,156 --> 00:09:52,192
And I'll win your money back.

174
00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:54,227
Thank you, cousin.

175
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:55,762
But are you sure you
can beat Mr. Gorpley?

176
00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:58,064
Balki..

177
00:09:58,098 --> 00:10:00,734
You are talking
to Smooth Larry Appleton.

178
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:02,035
I can beat anybody!

179
00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:03,904
There is magic in these hands.

180
00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:06,673
[instrumental music]

181
00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:20,854
Here's your two.

182
00:10:20,887 --> 00:10:22,288
Dealer takes three.

183
00:10:24,825 --> 00:10:26,893
I'd say these were
worth five bucks.

184
00:10:27,728 --> 00:10:29,195
Andre?

185
00:10:30,831 --> 00:10:33,399
‐ Walt?
‐ I'm out.

186
00:10:33,433 --> 00:10:35,035
Up to you, Bartokomous.

187
00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,136
Are ya in?

188
00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:38,905
Woah.

189
00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:42,075
Woah!

190
00:10:44,177 --> 00:10:47,047
Woah!

191
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,715
‐ Am I in?
‐ Balki.

192
00:10:48,749 --> 00:10:50,150
I got nothing.

193
00:10:52,753 --> 00:10:54,688
How 'bout you, Appleton?

194
00:10:54,721 --> 00:10:56,790
Oh...alright, I'm in.

195
00:10:57,891 --> 00:10:59,092
Read 'em and weep.

196
00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:00,727
Pair of threes.

197
00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:04,831
Woah.

198
00:11:04,865 --> 00:11:05,932
Tough hand.

199
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:07,968
Pair of sixes.

200
00:11:08,902 --> 00:11:09,870
Pair of sixes?

201
00:11:09,903 --> 00:11:12,138
[laughing]

202
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:14,074
Well, of all the luck.

203
00:11:15,241 --> 00:11:17,210
Cousin, you and me
must be the two

204
00:11:17,243 --> 00:11:19,445
worst poker players
in the whole world!

205
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,948
In fact..

206
00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:25,986
...I doubt if in the whole
history of card playing

207
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:29,255
there has ever been two more
rank‐smelling amateurs.

208
00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:33,994
‐ Oh, say. I have an idea.
‐ You do?

209
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,361
Why, yes I do.

210
00:11:35,395 --> 00:11:37,497
Well, I didn't plan
on this but..

211
00:11:37,531 --> 00:11:39,365
...what if Balki and I
pool our money

212
00:11:39,399 --> 00:11:41,134
so that just one of us plays?

213
00:11:41,167 --> 00:11:43,103
And then if we raise the stakes

214
00:11:43,136 --> 00:11:45,105
we might have a better chance
of winning our money back.

215
00:11:46,106 --> 00:11:48,074
Cousin, that's a great plan!

216
00:11:48,108 --> 00:11:49,876
Even though it's not a plan

217
00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:51,978
but something
you just now thought of..

218
00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:59,285
You want to raise the stakes?

219
00:11:59,319 --> 00:12:01,254
[laughing]

220
00:12:03,189 --> 00:12:05,291
Only if it's okay with you.

221
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,327
Hey, Sam,
these guys are just beginners.

222
00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:09,229
Come on, it doesn't seem fair.

223
00:12:09,262 --> 00:12:11,197
You want fair?
Go coach Little League.

224
00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:15,536
Okay.

225
00:12:15,569 --> 00:12:17,070
No limit.

226
00:12:17,103 --> 00:12:19,072
Which one of you is gonna play?

227
00:12:19,105 --> 00:12:20,841
‐ Well, see, uh, if..
‐ Well, you know, I‐I..

228
00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:23,510
[indistinct chatter]

229
00:12:30,016 --> 00:12:31,752
(both)
What was the question?

230
00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:39,092
Which one of you
is going to play?

231
00:12:39,125 --> 00:12:40,994
‐ Oh! I will.
‐ Oh, he will.

232
00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:45,966
We've decided that,
Cousin Larry is going to play

233
00:12:45,999 --> 00:12:48,268
even thought
that wasn't the plan, but

234
00:12:48,301 --> 00:12:50,036
something we just now
thought of.

235
00:12:53,006 --> 00:12:55,942
Now, what do you say,
we play some real poker?

236
00:13:00,013 --> 00:13:02,015
[instrumental music]

237
00:13:06,252 --> 00:13:08,889
[instrumental music]

238
00:13:14,394 --> 00:13:17,531
Okay,
I'll see your five.

239
00:13:17,564 --> 00:13:20,233
And raise you 20.

240
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:22,268
Andre?

241
00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:23,469
Walt?

242
00:13:23,504 --> 00:13:24,505
Hah.

243
00:13:24,538 --> 00:13:26,172
‐ Fold, cousin.
‐ Balki.

244
00:13:26,206 --> 00:13:29,275
Fold! Spindle! Mutilate!

245
00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:31,144
Just don't lose
anymore of our money!

246
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:32,913
I am trying to play poker.

247
00:13:35,015 --> 00:13:38,184
I'll see your 20..

248
00:13:38,218 --> 00:13:39,419
...and raise you another 20.

249
00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:42,188
[exhaling]
Okay.

250
00:13:43,189 --> 00:13:44,124
I call.
What do you got?

251
00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:47,193
Three jacks.
Beat 'em.

252
00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:48,962
Okay, three kings.

253
00:13:50,597 --> 00:13:53,399
Cousin, I got to talk to you
privately, excuse us!

254
00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:55,135
I'll be back.

255
00:13:56,236 --> 00:13:58,004
Cousin, remember that plan

256
00:13:58,038 --> 00:14:00,006
where smooth Larry Appleton
was supposed to win back

257
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:01,207
my $100?

258
00:14:01,241 --> 00:14:03,143
Well, I can't help but notice
that‐that we are

259
00:14:03,176 --> 00:14:04,878
that we are down
to our last $20.

260
00:14:04,911 --> 00:14:08,114
Now, when does the smooth plan
kick in?

261
00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:10,584
Everything's working perfectly.

262
00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:11,652
Gorpley thinks he's winning.

263
00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:14,287
Well, what a coincidence,
I think he's winning too.

264
00:14:18,258 --> 00:14:21,528
I am in total control
of this situation.

265
00:14:21,562 --> 00:14:22,362
Now gimme
the rest of your money.

266
00:14:22,395 --> 00:14:24,330
I don't think so.

267
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:30,203
I keep giving you money, and you
keep giving it to Mr. Gorpley.

268
00:14:30,236 --> 00:14:31,972
I could do that!

269
00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,476
Balki, your money is safe
with me, now hand it over.

270
00:14:36,510 --> 00:14:38,344
Cousin..

271
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:41,147
...this is my last $20.

272
00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:43,049
It's my mad money.

273
00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:45,886
If you lose it,
I'm gonna be real mad.

274
00:14:48,955 --> 00:14:51,357
Thanks.
Trust me.

275
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:52,593
Okay.

276
00:14:52,626 --> 00:14:54,561
I'm in.

277
00:14:57,063 --> 00:14:59,199
Guys, guys, guys.

278
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:02,102
Why don't you just give me
your last 20 bucks and go home?

279
00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:03,236
You can't beat me.

280
00:15:03,269 --> 00:15:05,539
I've been playing poker
since I was in high school.

281
00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:08,008
They used to call me,
Slick Sam Gorpley.

282
00:15:10,210 --> 00:15:12,378
Cousin, let's get out of here,
he's got a better nickname.

283
00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:14,347
Balki.

284
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:17,984
‐ I can take him.
‐ Okay.

285
00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:19,586
‐ I can do it!
‐ Okay.

286
00:15:19,620 --> 00:15:20,420
Why don't you go see a movie?

287
00:15:20,453 --> 00:15:22,388
I'd love to,
but you have all my money.

288
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:25,325
Gimme another $20 in chips.

289
00:15:25,358 --> 00:15:26,426
[scoffing]

290
00:15:28,394 --> 00:15:30,531
Larry, I was afraid
I'd find you here.

291
00:15:30,564 --> 00:15:31,632
Jennifer.

292
00:15:31,665 --> 00:15:33,534
Wow, who's the blonde?

293
00:15:33,567 --> 00:15:35,135
Appleton's girlfriend.

294
00:15:35,168 --> 00:15:36,703
Why I'll never know.

295
00:15:40,006 --> 00:15:41,407
Larry, could I talk to you
for a minute please?

296
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:44,277
Not now. It's my deal.

297
00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:46,146
‐ Balki, we have to talk.
‐ Yeah, okay.

298
00:15:49,249 --> 00:15:50,684
Balki, we have to get Larry
out of here.

299
00:15:50,717 --> 00:15:52,653
Well, tell me something
I don't know.

300
00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:54,521
How is he doing?

301
00:15:54,555 --> 00:15:56,089
Well, he says he's doing great

302
00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:58,424
but Mr. Gorpley
has all of our money.

303
00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,093
If we don't get Larry
out of here right now

304
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:01,161
he'll start writing IOU's.

305
00:16:01,194 --> 00:16:04,164
He'll bet his car,
he'll bet everything he owns!

306
00:16:04,197 --> 00:16:06,399
I'll raise you $20.

307
00:16:06,432 --> 00:16:08,001
But, how can that be?

308
00:16:08,034 --> 00:16:11,337
He's supposed to be
Smooth Larry Appleton.

309
00:16:11,371 --> 00:16:13,740
He was Smooth Larry Appleton
years ago.

310
00:16:13,774 --> 00:16:15,308
But that's before
he got the fever.

311
00:16:15,341 --> 00:16:17,043
'It got so bad,
he finally vowed to quit'

312
00:16:17,077 --> 00:16:19,412
and never pick up
the cards again.

313
00:16:19,445 --> 00:16:21,682
I told him not to take
this chance, but, Balki

314
00:16:21,715 --> 00:16:24,250
he said he had to do it for you.

315
00:16:24,284 --> 00:16:26,019
But, but, but..

316
00:16:26,052 --> 00:16:27,654
...do you think
he has any control left?

317
00:16:29,455 --> 00:16:31,692
Alright, here's your 20.

318
00:16:31,725 --> 00:16:33,293
And I'll throw in the blonde.

319
00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:41,334
Apparently not.

320
00:16:41,367 --> 00:16:43,136
Come on, Jennifer, we've got
to get him out of here.

321
00:16:43,169 --> 00:16:44,605
‐ Cousin, come on. we're gett‐
‐ Balki.

322
00:16:44,638 --> 00:16:46,472
I'm not going anywhere.

323
00:16:46,507 --> 00:16:49,676
Larry, please, you know you've
got the fever, you can't win!

324
00:16:49,710 --> 00:16:51,645
Cousin, I'm sorry,
but this is for your own good.

325
00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:53,346
‐ Now, come on!
‐ No! No! No!

326
00:16:53,379 --> 00:16:55,281
No! No! No!

327
00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:57,317
Mr. Gorpley, tell him
that the game is over.

328
00:16:57,350 --> 00:16:59,485
Please, you have to let us take
him home. He's lost control.

329
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,187
He's got $20 on the table.

330
00:17:01,221 --> 00:17:03,524
Yeah,
and not to mention the blonde.

331
00:17:03,557 --> 00:17:05,491
I'm not on the table!

332
00:17:07,227 --> 00:17:08,762
Oh, then I'm out.

333
00:17:11,397 --> 00:17:12,465
‐ And, Balki.
‐ What?

334
00:17:12,498 --> 00:17:13,499
‐ Put me down!
‐ No! Cou‐‐

335
00:17:13,534 --> 00:17:14,400
‐ Put me down!
‐ No!

336
00:17:14,434 --> 00:17:16,837
Put me down! Put me down!
Put me down now!

337
00:17:16,870 --> 00:17:19,072
Alright,
if you think it'll help.

338
00:17:19,105 --> 00:17:21,407
You're short, you dress funny
and you walk like a duck!

339
00:17:29,583 --> 00:17:31,652
Oh...oh..

340
00:17:31,685 --> 00:17:33,820
No, no, no.

341
00:17:33,854 --> 00:17:35,789
‐ Set me down.
‐ Okay.

342
00:17:39,593 --> 00:17:42,095
Pair of eights.

343
00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:44,230
Pair of jacks.
You lose again, Appleton.

344
00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:45,799
[laughing]

345
00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:49,102
Alright, Gorpley,
what do ya say?

346
00:17:49,135 --> 00:17:51,572
One more hand
for the whole ball of wax.

347
00:17:51,605 --> 00:17:54,440
No, cousin!
You can't bet my ball of wax!

348
00:17:54,474 --> 00:17:56,209
I've been collecting it
for years!

349
00:17:58,879 --> 00:18:01,114
Okay. I'll play
one more hand with you.

350
00:18:01,147 --> 00:18:03,316
But what are you gonna bet with?

351
00:18:03,349 --> 00:18:05,151
I'll bet..

352
00:18:05,185 --> 00:18:06,853
...next week's paycheck..

353
00:18:06,887 --> 00:18:09,355
...against everything
we lost tonight..

354
00:18:09,389 --> 00:18:11,224
...plus the hundred Balki lost.

355
00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:14,795
Ooh, you are
a serious card player.

356
00:18:14,828 --> 00:18:16,863
Cousin, cousin,
it's your paycheck!

357
00:18:22,869 --> 00:18:24,538
Don't worry, Balki.

358
00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:27,307
I'm not gonna lose.

359
00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,275
I'll take three.

360
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:35,549
And I'll take...one.

361
00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:40,787
I'll tell you what?

362
00:18:40,821 --> 00:18:43,223
Let's, uh...sweeten the pot.

363
00:18:44,658 --> 00:18:46,459
I'll raise you..

364
00:18:46,492 --> 00:18:47,628
...my car.

365
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,298
‐ No, cousin, don't do that!
‐ Balki.

366
00:18:52,332 --> 00:18:54,535
Cousin, you don't have
a pair of anything!

367
00:18:54,568 --> 00:18:57,170
Balki!

368
00:18:57,203 --> 00:18:59,405
Gee, I got a feeling
you're bluffing.

369
00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:01,542
[laughing]

370
00:19:01,575 --> 00:19:03,510
You wanna bet cars?

371
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:08,414
I call.

372
00:19:09,315 --> 00:19:10,350
What you got?

373
00:19:10,383 --> 00:19:11,685
Full house!

374
00:19:11,718 --> 00:19:13,386
Kings and Aces.

375
00:19:13,419 --> 00:19:16,189
[laughing]

376
00:19:16,222 --> 00:19:17,824
Uh, you can just leave your car
here and take the bus home.

377
00:19:17,858 --> 00:19:19,793
It'll be a nice lesson
in humility.

378
00:19:21,227 --> 00:19:22,729
Oh, not so quick, slick.

379
00:19:26,967 --> 00:19:29,302
When I sat down you thought
you had a pigeon

380
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:30,704
you could take to the cleaners.

381
00:19:30,737 --> 00:19:32,539
Cousin, cut through
the metaphors!

382
00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:38,444
I don't know what you're talking
about and I'm dying to know

383
00:19:38,478 --> 00:19:40,947
if we've won or lost!

384
00:19:40,981 --> 00:19:42,448
He thought I didn't know
how to play

385
00:19:42,482 --> 00:19:43,650
and that he could take
everything I had

386
00:19:43,684 --> 00:19:45,451
Oh.

387
00:19:45,485 --> 00:19:48,522
Then when you overheard Jennifer
say that I was out of control..

388
00:19:48,555 --> 00:19:49,422
...you thought it was Christmas.

389
00:19:49,455 --> 00:19:51,324
‐ Cousin‐‐
‐ He thought he could our money.

390
00:19:57,698 --> 00:20:01,401
Well, it was all a trap
and you walked right into it.

391
00:20:01,434 --> 00:20:02,969
The blonde was in on it?

392
00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:06,406
I have a name.

393
00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:07,974
You have a phone number?

394
00:20:09,275 --> 00:20:12,312
Walt, shut up.

395
00:20:12,345 --> 00:20:14,781
Balki's right, I don't have
a pair of anything.

396
00:20:15,882 --> 00:20:17,818
I got a straight flush.

397
00:20:19,853 --> 00:20:21,788
You lose, Gorpley.

398
00:20:23,957 --> 00:20:25,892
Oh!

399
00:20:31,965 --> 00:20:34,901
I can't believe I lost my car.

400
00:20:39,039 --> 00:20:40,607
Well..

401
00:20:40,641 --> 00:20:42,375
...I don't want your car.

402
00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:44,711
I just came to win back
what...Balki lost.

403
00:20:46,479 --> 00:20:48,414
Nice gesture, cousin..

404
00:20:49,750 --> 00:20:51,685
...but those are your car keys.

405
00:20:55,622 --> 00:20:58,358
[instrumental music]

406
00:21:03,463 --> 00:21:04,898
(Balki)
'Cousin?'

407
00:21:04,931 --> 00:21:06,967
You mean to tell me
that Jennifer..

408
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:08,935
...knew that you were pretending
to be out of control

409
00:21:08,969 --> 00:21:10,403
the whole time?

410
00:21:10,436 --> 00:21:12,305
Yes, she did.

411
00:21:12,338 --> 00:21:14,407
Cousin, why you didn't tell me
what you were going to do?

412
00:21:16,009 --> 00:21:17,844
I was really worried,
I spent the whole evening

413
00:21:17,878 --> 00:21:19,813
on an emotional roller derby.

414
00:21:23,750 --> 00:21:26,386
I'm sorry, Balki,
but‐but I had no choice.

415
00:21:26,419 --> 00:21:28,088
I knew you couldn't
keep my secret.

416
00:21:28,121 --> 00:21:30,323
You're just not
a devious person.

417
00:21:32,826 --> 00:21:36,029
Well, I'm sorry,
we all have our shortcomings.

418
00:21:36,062 --> 00:21:38,965
No, no, Balki. That‐that's
a good thing in life.

419
00:21:38,999 --> 00:21:41,835
Oh, uh..

420
00:21:41,868 --> 00:21:44,437
Here's your $100.

421
00:21:44,470 --> 00:21:45,972
Thanks, cousin.

422
00:21:46,006 --> 00:21:48,408
Thank you,
for wining my money back.

423
00:21:48,441 --> 00:21:49,876
I think you would have done
the same for me.

424
00:21:49,910 --> 00:21:51,545
You know I would.

425
00:21:53,046 --> 00:21:54,915
You know, cousin,
this has been quite a week.

426
00:21:56,416 --> 00:21:59,352
Mr. Gorpley fooled me.

427
00:21:59,385 --> 00:22:01,522
You fooled me.

428
00:22:01,555 --> 00:22:03,489
Jennifer fooled me.

429
00:22:05,959 --> 00:22:08,595
I'm beginning to think..

430
00:22:08,629 --> 00:22:11,732
...I'm...easily fooled.

431
00:22:13,834 --> 00:22:16,670
You? You? No!
N‐no, Balki.

432
00:22:16,703 --> 00:22:19,439
You are not easily fooled.

433
00:22:19,472 --> 00:22:21,074
Really?

434
00:22:21,107 --> 00:22:22,976
Well, thank you,
that's a load off my mind.

435
00:22:24,645 --> 00:22:26,513
Oh...what's that?

436
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,016
[instrumental music]

437
00:22:31,885 --> 00:22:33,820
What's what?

438
00:22:35,889 --> 00:22:37,824
What's that?

439
00:22:39,860 --> 00:22:41,862
What's what?

440
00:22:41,895 --> 00:22:42,929
What‐what's that?
What?

441
00:22:45,966 --> 00:22:47,701
[music continues]

442
00:22:51,672 --> 00:22:54,608
[instrumental music]

443
00:22:58,879 --> 00:23:01,682
[theme music]