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[David Pomeranz performing
"Nothing's Gonna Stop Me Now"]

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♪ Sometimes the world
looks perfect ♪

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♪ Nothing to rearrange ♪

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♪ Sometimes you just
get a feeling ♪

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♪ Like you need
some kind of change ♪

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♪ No matter what
the odds are this time ♪

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♪ Nothing's going to
stand in my way ♪

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♪ This flame in my heart ♪

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♪ Like a long lost friend ♪

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♪ Gives every dark street
a light at the end ♪

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♪ Standing tall ♪

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♪ On the wings of my dream ♪

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♪ Rise and fall ♪

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♪ On the wings of my dream ♪

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♪ The rain and thunder
The wind and haze ♪

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♪ I'm bound for better days ♪

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♪ It's my life and my dream ♪

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♪ And nothing's going
to stop me now ♪

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[instrumental music]

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Appleton?

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Yes sir, Mr. Wainwright?

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Every year one of our reporters

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teaches a journalism course
at Chicago Community College.

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I asked Walpole who he would
recommend and he picked you.

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Me?

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Well, I'm flattered!

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I‐I'm honored!
Th‐this is a big compliment!

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I knew you'd make
a big deal out of this.

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I didn't mean to.

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Uh, it's just that
of all the people

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at the Chronicle,
the fact that he picked me‐‐

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‐ Appleton.
‐ Am I doing it again?

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‐ Yes.
‐ Sorry.

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Here are all the details
on the course.

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Sir..

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...I'll try to make you
proud of me.

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I'll be satisfied if you just
don't embarrass the Chronicle.

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Harriette, did you hear that?

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They want me to teach
a college class.

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Hm‐mmm.

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Maybe I'll get the class
to publish their own newspaper.

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I can divide 'em up
into departments.

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Business, Editorial,
Sports, Politics.

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Ooh, maybe I could
take them all to Washington!

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Stop the presses, baby.

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This is junior college,
not Time Magazine.

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Harriette, this is my chance
to make a mark

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on the future
of American journalism.

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I'll be molding
the minds of tomorrow.

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First they burn a hole
in the ozone layer..

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...now they've got you
molding minds.

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World's getting scarier
all the time!

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♪ I just want to tell you
how I'm feeling ♪

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♪ Gotta make you understand ♪

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♪ Never gonna give you up
never gonna let you down ♪

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♪ Never gonna run around
and desert you ♪

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♪ Never gonna make you cry ♪

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♪ Never gonna tell a lie ♪

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♪ Never gonna say goodbye
and hurt you ♪

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Balki?

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Balki.

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Before you do injury
to some major muscle group..

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...let me tell you
the good news!

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Guess who's going to be teaching
journalism at your school?

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Walter Cronkite?

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‐ No.
‐ Ted Koppel?

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‐ No.
‐ Willard Scott!

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No, no, Balki.

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Me!

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You?

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You're not even on television.

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What do you know
about journalism?

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Newspaper journalism!

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‐ Then you'd be perfect!
‐ Thank you.

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Cousin, I can't believe
I know a college teacher.

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This makes me a BSOC.

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‐ BSOC?
‐ Big Sheepherder On Campus.

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[instrumental music]

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[indistinct chatter]

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I'd like to welcome you..

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...to Journalism 101.

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Introduction to News Writing.

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Now.

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Let me introduce myself.

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My name is..

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Mr. Appleton

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Appeton‐Apple‐Appleton,
Appleton.

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I'd, uh, like to give you
a little background on myself.

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Cousin! Cousin!
Great news! Great News!

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My‐my class was cancelled and so
now I get to take your class!

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And now we are so happy,
we do the Dance of Joy!

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♪ Da‐da‐da da‐da‐da‐da ♪

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Hey, hey! Hey!

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‐ Hey!
‐ Uh, um, Balki.

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What?

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I have a class in session.

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Oh, uh, I'm sorry.
Cousin Larry, I‐‐

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Balki, in front of the students

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you should call me Mr. Appleton.

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Mr. Appleton?

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Mr. Appleton.

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I'm his cousin.

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He‐he lets me call him
Cousin Larry at home.

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Now I was going to tell you
about my background.

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‐ E‐excuse me?
‐ Yes?

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Is this going
to be on the final exam?

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No.

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Oh.

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Well, uh, getting back
to my background..

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[clearing throat]

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For the past two years, uh..

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...I have been
intimately involved

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with the day‐to‐day operation

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of one of America's
great newspapers..

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The Chicago Chronicle.

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I can vouch for that. He works
in the basement with me.

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For the past few months,
I've been working closely

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with the Pulitzer Prize‐winning
investigative reporting team..

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...of Marshall and Walpole

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And get this, not only do they
sometimes let him write

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but they send him out
for lunch every single day.

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‐ Balki.
‐ He never gets it wrong!

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'I don't know how he does it!'

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Except, there was that one time.

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The egg salad incident.
They found‐‐

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Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me.

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[laughing]

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I am the teacher,
you are the student.

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I talk, you listen.

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Just like at home.

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Now, your first assignment..

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...will be to take, uh,
any ordinary event

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that you see or hear about
in the next few days

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and write it as a news story.

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To help you, I have prepared
this concise, easy‐to‐read

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forty‐seven page guide
on how to write a news story.

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Excuse me.

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Is‐is this going
to be on the final?

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‐ Yes.
‐ Oh, fine.

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He‐he may seem tough now,
but once you get to know him

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you'll find he's totally
without merit.

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[instrumental music]

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Cousin! Cousin! Is this..

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Is this good enough
for my news story?

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I just saw a cloud in the sky
that looks like a bull moose!

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I don't think so.

147
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How about one that looks like
Cybil Sheepherder?

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Balki, I think
you're going to have to come up

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with something
a little more substantial.

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But what, cousin? What?

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I've been looking for days

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and I can't
come up with anything.

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I'm at the end
of my soap on a rope!

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Come on, cousin, just..

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Will you...will you
just‐just give me a..

156
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...uh, just a little
tiny itty bitty little hint?

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‐ Balki.
‐ What?

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It wouldn't be fair
to the other students

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in the class
if I gave you special treatment.

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But, cousin, I‐I want my paper
to be the best one in the class.

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Come on, cousin, just..

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...just‐just give me
a little hint.

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Just, just‐just..

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...just let it out.

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Just‐just‐just..

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...let it out.

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Come on. Just...let it out.

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You just thinking, and it comes
down the nerve endings

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and it pops out. Pop.

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Please, cousin,
just a little hint?

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No.

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[knocking on door]

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(both)
Come in!

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‐ 'Oh!'
‐ 'Oh!'

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Welcome home, welcome home!

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Welcome home!

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You won't believe
what happened on our flight.

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‐ A fight broke out.
‐ Hm‐mmm.

179
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There was a fight on the plane?

180
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Yes, some of the people
in the no‐smoking section

181
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started smoking. Well, some
of the non‐smokers got upset.

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The next thing we knew people
started shoving each other.

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And food was flying everywhere!

184
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Well, that is quite a story.

185
00:10:06,406 --> 00:10:09,743
That's some exciting news.

186
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Isn't that exciting news?
Balki?

187
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Have you got a tick?

188
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Balki is looking for a news
story for my journalism class.

189
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And I can't find one anywhere.
I..

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[gasping]

191
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I could write about the food
fight on the aeroplane!

192
00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:35,869
Well, there's a thought.

193
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Balki, you've got quite
a nose for news.

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Well, it is the pride of Mypos.

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[instrumental music]

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Cousin, will you grade
my news story?

197
00:10:54,420 --> 00:10:55,822
Oh, Balki, no.

198
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I just got back from class

199
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I really don't feel
like grading papers.

200
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:00,894
Oh, cousin, please?

201
00:11:00,927 --> 00:11:02,295
‐ Please grade my paper.
‐ No.

202
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,097
‐ Oh, please, please, please.
‐ No, no, no.

203
00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:06,833
‐ Please, please, please!
‐ No, no, no.

204
00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:09,302
‐ Please?
‐ Alright.

205
00:11:11,905 --> 00:11:13,840
[jingling]

206
00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:29,389
[chuckling]

207
00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:31,191
Nice cover.

208
00:11:33,093 --> 00:11:34,995
It can also be used
as a tambourine.

209
00:11:38,231 --> 00:11:40,967
Most of my teachers give me
extra credit for presentation.

210
00:11:44,805 --> 00:11:46,272
[sighing]

211
00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:48,208
[jingling]

212
00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:50,443
Balki..

213
00:11:50,476 --> 00:11:52,478
...why don't you find
something else to do

214
00:11:52,513 --> 00:11:54,247
while I grade your paper?

215
00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:57,450
‐ Oh! I get it.
‐ Hm‐mmm.

216
00:11:57,483 --> 00:11:59,753
You, uh, you don't have to paint
me a photograph.

217
00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:03,356
Well, I'll just, uh..

218
00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:05,425
...I'll just be doing
some light housework..

219
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:07,828
...over there.

220
00:12:17,971 --> 00:12:19,906
[jingling]

221
00:12:49,302 --> 00:12:51,037
[no audio]

222
00:13:02,482 --> 00:13:03,449
I thought you were
dusting over there.

223
00:13:03,483 --> 00:13:05,418
I am dusting over there.

224
00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:13,894
[jingling]

225
00:13:14,895 --> 00:13:16,496
Okay, I'm done.

226
00:13:16,530 --> 00:13:18,565
Oh, cousin, I'm so..

227
00:13:18,599 --> 00:13:20,266
...I'm so excited!

228
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,302
[panting]

229
00:13:22,335 --> 00:13:24,270
How did I do?

230
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:26,406
Well, Balki, remember,
this is your first attempt.

231
00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:30,276
Oh, I‐I‐I want an A‐plus.

232
00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:35,849
But‐but, uh, I know
that this is my first..

233
00:13:35,882 --> 00:13:37,417
...first attempt at a news story

234
00:13:37,450 --> 00:13:40,320
and‐and there's probably room
for improvement, so..

235
00:13:40,353 --> 00:13:43,423
...so I‐I‐I guess
I better be prepared

236
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:45,391
to live with an A.

237
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:49,495
[jingling]

238
00:13:49,530 --> 00:13:51,464
[chuckling]

239
00:13:52,633 --> 00:13:54,568
[jingling]

240
00:14:04,578 --> 00:14:06,179
An F?

241
00:14:08,949 --> 00:14:11,552
I'm sorry, Balki, but there were
some fundamental mistakes.

242
00:14:11,585 --> 00:14:14,154
Now, I know
you're a little disappointed.

243
00:14:16,056 --> 00:14:18,659
But...look at this
as a growth experience.

244
00:14:18,692 --> 00:14:20,260
I'm gonna get taller from this?

245
00:14:20,293 --> 00:14:21,194
No.

246
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:25,932
No, I mean..

247
00:14:25,966 --> 00:14:29,302
...one can often learn more
from failure than from success.

248
00:14:29,335 --> 00:14:31,104
Can I learn
a little less and get a C?

249
00:14:31,137 --> 00:14:32,038
No.

250
00:14:33,039 --> 00:14:34,675
No.

251
00:14:34,708 --> 00:14:38,344
Balki, I know I set
my grading standards high.

252
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:41,481
But I expect a lot
from my students.

253
00:14:41,515 --> 00:14:44,117
Now, if you work really hard..

254
00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:47,253
...someday you'll get a paper
back from me with an A on it

255
00:14:47,287 --> 00:14:49,022
and it will
really mean something.

256
00:14:51,091 --> 00:14:53,026
Well, that's
something to shoot for.

257
00:14:55,295 --> 00:14:56,597
That's the spirit.

258
00:14:56,630 --> 00:14:58,231
Goodnight, buddy.

259
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:01,367
[instrumental music]

260
00:15:05,539 --> 00:15:08,041
[instrumental music]

261
00:15:12,278 --> 00:15:13,947
(Larry)
'Keep that in mind
when you are writing.'

262
00:15:13,980 --> 00:15:16,950
Remember, when you
organize those long

263
00:15:16,983 --> 00:15:20,053
complicated sentences, try..

264
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,321
...a semi‐colon.

265
00:15:24,625 --> 00:15:26,492
It may be just what you need..

266
00:15:26,527 --> 00:15:27,928
...to save your story.

267
00:15:34,467 --> 00:15:37,704
Now, before we run out of time..

268
00:15:37,738 --> 00:15:39,640
...Balki, could you
give me a hand

269
00:15:39,673 --> 00:15:41,542
handing back
the news story assignments?

270
00:15:43,143 --> 00:15:44,044
Balki?

271
00:15:46,046 --> 00:15:47,648
But, cousin..

272
00:15:47,681 --> 00:15:50,050
...as an F student
I'm not qualified

273
00:15:50,083 --> 00:15:51,685
to pass out papers.

274
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:54,287
Balki, you are not an F student.

275
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,289
‐ I'm not?
‐ You're a good student..

276
00:15:56,322 --> 00:15:57,724
...who did F work.

277
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:01,562
You gonna pass out the papers

278
00:16:01,595 --> 00:16:03,396
or are we gonna grow
old together?

279
00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:13,173
Now, I did see a lot
of potential in these papers

280
00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:16,710
but there's also
a lot of room for improvement.

281
00:16:16,743 --> 00:16:18,478
Hey, wait a minute.
This looks like an F.

282
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:22,015
It is an F.

283
00:16:22,048 --> 00:16:23,584
But maybe with some hard work

284
00:16:23,617 --> 00:16:25,519
your next assignment can be a D.

285
00:16:27,588 --> 00:16:29,222
Hey, I got an F too.

286
00:16:29,255 --> 00:16:32,759
‐ Oh, man!
‐ Dipstick.

287
00:16:32,793 --> 00:16:34,761
[all grumbling]

288
00:16:34,795 --> 00:16:36,530
Now, now. Hey, remember‐‐

289
00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:37,664
Jerk.

290
00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:43,036
One can often learn more
from failure than from success.

291
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:46,607
Who is this guy?
Mr. Rogers?

292
00:16:48,542 --> 00:16:51,277
I have never
gotten an F in my life!

293
00:16:51,311 --> 00:16:52,813
You failed all of us?

294
00:16:52,846 --> 00:16:55,115
And this from a guy
who works in a basement!

295
00:16:55,148 --> 00:16:56,683
[indistinct chatter]

296
00:16:58,852 --> 00:17:01,655
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

297
00:17:03,289 --> 00:17:05,559
I know this first assignment
was tough

298
00:17:05,592 --> 00:17:09,129
but this is all aimed
at making you good journalists.

299
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:11,765
Who wants to be a journalist?
I wanna be a linebacker!

300
00:17:11,798 --> 00:17:13,534
[bell ringing]

301
00:17:16,169 --> 00:17:17,704
[indistinct chatter]

302
00:17:28,414 --> 00:17:30,150
I wonder what got into them?

303
00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:33,654
You failed the entire class?

304
00:17:35,288 --> 00:17:38,592
Well, Balki, I told you
I set my standards high.

305
00:17:38,625 --> 00:17:41,528
Your‐your standards are so high

306
00:17:41,562 --> 00:17:44,164
I can't even see them from here!

307
00:17:44,197 --> 00:17:47,333
Now, Balki, my standards
are not that high!

308
00:17:47,367 --> 00:17:49,603
I‐if I want to bring out
the best in my students

309
00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:50,871
they're‐they're just gonna
have to learn

310
00:17:50,904 --> 00:17:52,606
from their mistakes.
Like you did.

311
00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:54,174
What are you talking about?

312
00:17:54,207 --> 00:17:55,642
Well, I read
your second attempt at a story

313
00:17:55,676 --> 00:17:57,511
and believe me,
you improved!

314
00:17:57,544 --> 00:18:00,413
What? I...what second
attempt at a story?

315
00:18:00,446 --> 00:18:01,548
Look, I know
you were embarrassed

316
00:18:01,582 --> 00:18:03,316
to show it to me after the F

317
00:18:03,349 --> 00:18:05,886
but I saw your story on the
kitchen table this morning

318
00:18:05,919 --> 00:18:08,655
so I thought
I'd help you out and grade it.

319
00:18:08,689 --> 00:18:10,657
Oh, cousin, this isn't my story.

320
00:18:10,691 --> 00:18:13,393
This is, uh,
Mr. Wainwright's story

321
00:18:13,426 --> 00:18:15,161
that he wrote in college.

322
00:18:18,799 --> 00:18:21,334
‐ Mr. Wainwright wrote this?
‐ Yeah.

323
00:18:21,367 --> 00:18:24,204
He‐he gave it to me
so that I could learn

324
00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:27,473
by looking at a really
good news story.

325
00:18:27,508 --> 00:18:29,610
It‐it must be good.

326
00:18:29,643 --> 00:18:32,178
He got an A on it
from the prestigious

327
00:18:32,212 --> 00:18:34,748
Columbia University
School of Journalism.

328
00:18:40,486 --> 00:18:42,188
He got an A on it?

329
00:18:42,222 --> 00:18:43,123
Yeah.

330
00:18:52,733 --> 00:18:55,602
What grade did you give him?

331
00:19:00,541 --> 00:19:02,843
Doesn't make any difference.

332
00:19:02,876 --> 00:19:04,845
It's not your paper.

333
00:19:04,878 --> 00:19:05,779
But..

334
00:19:07,347 --> 00:19:09,783
...Mr. Wainwright give it to me.

335
00:19:09,816 --> 00:19:11,552
And you left it
on the kitchen table.

336
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:16,389
But...but that don't mean
that you can take it.

337
00:19:16,422 --> 00:19:17,691
Finders keepers.

338
00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:21,194
Ah! Oh! Oh!

339
00:19:21,227 --> 00:19:22,763
[grunting]

340
00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:25,932
[gasping]

341
00:19:29,503 --> 00:19:32,238
You gave
Mr. Wainwright a C‐minus?

342
00:19:34,875 --> 00:19:36,510
I had my reasons.

343
00:19:36,543 --> 00:19:38,411
There was no name,
several comma problems..

344
00:19:38,444 --> 00:19:40,180
and I thought it went on a bit.

345
00:19:45,786 --> 00:19:48,454
Columbia School of Journalism?

346
00:19:48,488 --> 00:19:50,857
His instructor
was Edward R. Murrow.

347
00:19:55,261 --> 00:19:57,497
Oh, my Lord!

348
00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:01,868
[chuckling]
Cousin..

349
00:20:01,902 --> 00:20:05,338
...I‐I‐I've got to go
to another class.

350
00:20:07,874 --> 00:20:10,611
Po po po!

351
00:20:14,848 --> 00:20:15,749
Po.

352
00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:20,721
Edward R. Murrow?

353
00:20:21,955 --> 00:20:23,256
Oh!

354
00:20:37,938 --> 00:20:40,707
I want to discuss my grade.

355
00:20:40,741 --> 00:20:42,676
And your face.

356
00:20:45,812 --> 00:20:47,548
I'll be with you
in just a moment.

357
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:51,918
[instrumental music]

358
00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:04,030
Hi, cousin.

359
00:21:04,064 --> 00:21:05,899
Where have you been?

360
00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:07,668
[sighing]

361
00:21:08,802 --> 00:21:10,336
I've been..

362
00:21:10,370 --> 00:21:11,705
...sitting in my classroom

363
00:21:11,738 --> 00:21:13,940
waiting for security
to walk me out of the building.

364
00:21:18,011 --> 00:21:20,747
You know,
during those four hours..

365
00:21:24,017 --> 00:21:26,520
...I did some thinking.

366
00:21:26,553 --> 00:21:29,890
And, uh, I‐I think I went a..

367
00:21:29,923 --> 00:21:32,526
...little over the edge
with this class.

368
00:21:34,995 --> 00:21:37,397
You know, cousin, on Mypos
when we teach sheep to jump

369
00:21:37,430 --> 00:21:40,901
over a fence, we don't just take
them to the Great Wall of Mypos

370
00:21:40,934 --> 00:21:43,504
on the very first day
and say, "jump, mutton head!"

371
00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:48,542
No, we‐we‐we start little.

372
00:21:48,575 --> 00:21:51,912
First, you teach the sheep
to jump over your foot.

373
00:21:51,945 --> 00:21:54,581
Which can be very encouraging
for the sheep.

374
00:21:54,615 --> 00:21:57,618
A‐although, at times..

375
00:21:57,651 --> 00:22:00,687
...painful for the teacher.

376
00:22:00,721 --> 00:22:03,423
But‐but, uh, what you do,
you, little by little

377
00:22:03,456 --> 00:22:05,058
you make the goals
higher and higher

378
00:22:05,091 --> 00:22:08,595
and before you know it
those sheep are playing

379
00:22:08,629 --> 00:22:10,363
Leap Sheep all over the meadow.

380
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:16,136
You're right, Balki,
it was an introductory class.

381
00:22:16,169 --> 00:22:18,471
I‐I was too hard on them.

382
00:22:18,505 --> 00:22:20,006
Well, you still
have time to change.

383
00:22:21,542 --> 00:22:23,143
One of the things I did
while I was hiding

384
00:22:23,176 --> 00:22:25,712
under my desk..

385
00:22:25,746 --> 00:22:28,715
...was to grade
those papers over again.

386
00:22:28,749 --> 00:22:30,551
Did...did you‐did you
grade mine?

387
00:22:30,584 --> 00:22:32,118
Yes, I did.

388
00:22:32,152 --> 00:22:35,689
This time I graded
purely on content.

389
00:22:35,722 --> 00:22:37,490
‐ You got an A.
‐ I got an A!

390
00:22:37,524 --> 00:22:39,059
Balki, you got an A‐minus.

391
00:22:42,796 --> 00:22:43,864
An A‐minus?

392
00:22:45,131 --> 00:22:47,133
Hey, gimme a break.

393
00:22:47,167 --> 00:22:48,902
The best I could do
for Mr. Wainwright was a B.

394
00:22:50,470 --> 00:22:53,006
[instrumental music]

395
00:22:58,211 --> 00:23:00,714
[theme music]