1 00:00:32,480 --> 00:00:34,920 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 2 00:00:34,920 --> 00:00:41,120 Well, good evening, good evening, good evening, good evening, 3 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:44,360 and that's the fewest times I've ever said good evening, 4 00:00:44,360 --> 00:00:45,600 and welcome to QI, 5 00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:50,280 where tonight we'll be journeying to jestinations beginning with J. 6 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:54,000 And joining me are the jet-skiing Sandi Toksvig... 7 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:56,120 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 8 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:02,120 ..the jet-setting Susan Calman... 9 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:04,840 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 10 00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:07,640 The jet-engined Bill Bailey... 11 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:10,920 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 12 00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:16,080 ..and, still being probed by Gatwick security, Alan Davies. 13 00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:18,840 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 14 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:26,120 Now let's hear your buzzers. And Sandi goes... 15 00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,200 RACING CAR 16 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:31,080 Susan goes... 17 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:32,640 JET ENGINE 18 00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:35,760 Bill goes... 19 00:01:35,760 --> 00:01:37,280 FAST VEHICLE ENGINE 20 00:01:38,320 --> 00:01:40,320 And Alan goes... 21 00:01:40,320 --> 00:01:42,080 CAR ENGINE CHOKES 22 00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:45,440 Try that again. 23 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:47,040 CHOKES AGAIN 24 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:50,960 - No, it's never going to work, is it? - Flooded it. - Yeah, absolutely. 25 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:53,640 Well, let's have an easy one to start with. 26 00:01:53,640 --> 00:01:57,400 Strictly speaking, where does the phrase Chariots Of Fire come from? 27 00:01:57,400 --> 00:02:00,400 - It's a film. - It's a film. - Where did it originate? 28 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:02,760 It's something to do with this. 29 00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:05,600 Where does the phrase originate? 30 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:08,880 - It's a quotation. - SANDI: It's a quotation. 31 00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:11,560 - From what? - Shakespeare, must be Shakespeare. - No. 32 00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:13,120 BILL: Oh, the Chariots Of Fire. 33 00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:16,560 Wordsworth, Jerusalem, the hymn Jerusalem. 34 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:18,240 ALARM BELLS 35 00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:23,560 - You fell finally into our trap. - Finally! It took a while. Sorry, it's the first question. 36 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:28,160 It was slightly embarrassing how long it took you to get the wrong answer. 37 00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:30,800 Yes, I did start by saying "strictly speaking". 38 00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:34,760 Strictly speaking it comes from a poem by William Blake, called...? 39 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:36,560 - Chariots Of Fire. - No. 40 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:40,720 I'm ashamed of you. 41 00:02:40,720 --> 00:02:43,280 You must know the first line of... 42 00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:46,880 I must, but I can't be arsed to tell you. 43 00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:49,520 - Well, you're not English, that's fair. - Fair. 44 00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:51,160 - And... - And did... 45 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:54,320 - BILL & SANDI: Those feet in ancient times. - Thank you! 46 00:02:54,320 --> 00:02:55,600 Finally we got there. 47 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:57,960 - Oh, I know that! - Yes! 48 00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,200 That's the name of the poem 49 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:03,840 - from which the line "chariots of fire" comes. - Oh. 50 00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:05,320 The tune is called Jerusalem. 51 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:06,520 # And did those feet... # 52 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,520 And it's referred, mistakenly as a hymn. 53 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:09,920 # In ancient times... # 54 00:03:09,920 --> 00:03:12,200 Thank you for starting in my key. 55 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:14,760 # Walk upon England's la la la... # 56 00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:16,200 Come on! 57 00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:21,160 Bring... Oh, clouds unfold. 58 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:24,880 Yes, really what I'm after is, what does it mean? And whose feet? 59 00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:29,240 "And did those feet in ancient times appear on England's mountains green." Whose feet? 60 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:34,600 - Jesus, surely. - Right. So what is the story of Jesus coming to England? 61 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:37,520 - Is there a film about it? - Yes. 62 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:42,080 - Not to my knowledge. - Well, then, I'm in trouble. I am, as they say, out of... 63 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:45,720 This is what people say when they don't know the answer - "I'm out of my comfort zone." 64 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:49,160 You have been the equivalent of 65 00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:52,080 - sitting on spikes for the last ten years, Alan. - Yeah! 66 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:55,560 I have yet to discover your comfort zone. 67 00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:58,760 - OK, listen, there is a legend that Jesus came to England. - Yes. 68 00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:03,000 And did those feet, his feet, in ancient time... 69 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:06,680 And he was said to have gone to a particular place. 70 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:10,040 - SANDI: Was it Glastonbury? - The audience know. Ah, thank you. 71 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:12,680 - Glastonbury. - Glastonbury. Glastonbury Tor. 72 00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:16,120 - And he went with his uncle. What was his uncle's name? - Bob. 73 00:04:16,120 --> 00:04:20,720 - Uncle Bob Christ? - Bob's your uncle. 74 00:04:21,840 --> 00:04:24,240 Yeah, they were a bit more... 75 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:28,040 Surely they were more informal in those times, surely. Bob Christ. 76 00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:30,640 - His uncle's name was the same as his father's name. - Joseph. 77 00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:33,840 - Joseph. - Joseph. And he was named after a place. 78 00:04:33,840 --> 00:04:37,400 Is it like working with very slow children, Stephen? 79 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,680 - BILL: Arimathea. - Thank you! 80 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:43,000 - Say it again so the camera can get it, clearly. - Right. Oh, OK. 81 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,720 - This is a new thing we're doing. - Hang on a second. 82 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:47,280 ALAN'S BUZZER 83 00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:49,400 Hey, hang on! 84 00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:50,760 You had your chance. 85 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:53,040 - I was just composing my face. - Joseph of Arimathea. 86 00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:55,760 No, I said it! I said it! 87 00:04:55,760 --> 00:04:58,040 Joseph of Arimathea. 88 00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:01,200 I'm going to throw cold water over you both in a minute. 89 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:03,120 Joseph of Arimathea. 90 00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:04,560 ALAN'S BUZZER 91 00:05:04,560 --> 00:05:06,120 Joseph of Arimathea! 92 00:05:06,120 --> 00:05:09,440 It was the first ever Glastonbury Festival, if you will. 93 00:05:09,440 --> 00:05:13,560 It was that Jesus supposedly came with his uncle, Joseph of Arimathea, 94 00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:15,480 who is mentioned in the Gospels, 95 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:18,960 although, it has to be said, Arimathea is only mentioned once, 96 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:21,920 and that is in relation to the place Joseph came from. 97 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:26,320 No-one knows where it is, where it was, where it could have been. Anyway... 98 00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:28,840 It could have been a falafel tent. Nobody knows. 99 00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:31,200 Jesus was effectively the first act, then. 100 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:35,080 - He was the first act ever to appear at Glasto. - He was the first on at Glastonbury. 101 00:05:35,080 --> 00:05:39,680 Was he a juggler? Did he have bongos? Was he doing the diablo thing? 102 00:05:39,680 --> 00:05:41,520 He did holistic balancing. 103 00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:43,600 Three rooms of banging scripture. 104 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:44,720 All right, OK. 105 00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:48,120 So there was a myth that Jesus and Joseph of Arimathea came... 106 00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:50,800 Supposedly, Joseph of Arimathea was after tin, 107 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:55,200 and he came with Jesus, went to Glastonbury Tor and there's a tree. 108 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:58,800 SANDI: Tree, isn't there, the Glastonbury tree. Did Mary come? 109 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:01,520 - Supposedly, it was planted... Sorry? - Mary, the mother. 110 00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:05,480 - I just wondered if Mum came as well. - I don't think she did. - Boys' weekend. 111 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,360 We don't know. Boys' weekend! 112 00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:12,040 But I will give you 20 points each if you can mention the two other places the myth says they went to. 113 00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:15,600 Glastonbury is one, but they were said to have gone to two other places. 114 00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:17,160 - Wait! I know this. - Torquay? - No. 115 00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:21,320 Because there's a group called the Aetherius Society, and they believe... 116 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:23,440 Oh, they're your neighbours, aren't they? 117 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,160 They're my neighbours in Devon, 118 00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:28,760 and they believe that Christ appeared to them on the top of this hill, 119 00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:34,320 and the founder of the Aetherius Society said he was doing the washing-up in his flat, 120 00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:36,000 and he heard a voice say, 121 00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:42,040 "You have been chosen as the planetary representative of Earth." 122 00:06:42,040 --> 00:06:46,280 So, immediately, he went, "Oh, right. I'd better do that, then." 123 00:06:46,280 --> 00:06:51,040 - So he left the drying up? - He left the drying up to someone else. - And the putting away? 124 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:54,120 Can I just ask how much Bill knows about washing up? 125 00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:58,440 Cos you do it like you're typing. You did that for washing up. 126 00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:02,000 It's just a little, gentle caress of each thing. 127 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:05,240 And then that to get rid of the plates. 128 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:08,240 - He eats his dinner off old keyboards. - Yeah. 129 00:07:08,240 --> 00:07:09,680 That's my life. 130 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:12,480 - Anyway, the places were, in fact, Penzance was one. - Oh! 131 00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:13,960 And the other was Falmouth. 132 00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:16,240 - Oh, I see. - And I'm sure he had a lovely time. 133 00:07:16,240 --> 00:07:19,760 - A pasty, did he have a pasty? - He would have had a pasty. 134 00:07:19,760 --> 00:07:24,000 Now, what can you tell me, as we were on the subject of Jerusalem, about the Jerusalem artichoke? 135 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:26,360 - Well, it isn't. - It isn't what? 136 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:28,480 From Jerusalem. 137 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:31,200 It's not from Jerusalem is right. That's absolutely correct. 138 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:34,360 What else can you tell me? You said it's not from Jerusalem. 139 00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:36,600 - It's not an artichoke. - And it's not an artichoke. 140 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:40,840 - Aaah. - Do you know why? - It's just a lie. The whole thing's a lie. It's annoying. 141 00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:44,760 Jerusalem artichoke, not from Jerusalem, not an artichoke, you don't know where you are. 142 00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:47,440 The word Jerusalem is a corruption of what it actually is. 143 00:07:47,440 --> 00:07:50,320 We used to grow them in America. 144 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:53,200 When I grew up in New York, we grew them. They look like sunflowers. 145 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:58,960 Oddly enough, you say America, it is the only endemic, original, 146 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,360 natural vegetable from North America. 147 00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:03,120 - Is that right? - There is none other. 148 00:08:03,120 --> 00:08:05,880 Potatoes come from central and southern America, 149 00:08:05,880 --> 00:08:07,480 as do tomatoes and chillies. 150 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:11,240 There are some wild rices that come from Canada and North America, 151 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:12,440 but that is the only... 152 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:15,440 Isn't that bizarre? In that whole landmass. 153 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,240 You think of squashes and all those other things. 154 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:21,440 - So if it looks like a sunflower... - Say sunflower in Italian. 155 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:25,600 - Giras. - Jerusalem. - Girasole. - Girasole. 156 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:29,440 - Gira, turn, as in gyroscope, to the sun. - Girasole. - Girasole. 157 00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:33,360 - And girasole became Jerusalem. - The same thing. 158 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:35,920 We call it a sun...because they turn... 159 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:38,520 I'll be very impressed if you know what's Greek for sun... 160 00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:42,360 If I knew what it was, you'd be more than impressed, you'd have a heart attack. 161 00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:49,880 - Do you know what the Greek for sun is? - Helios. - Helios, OK. 162 00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:53,600 - So helio is sun. Turn, turn. - Heliotrope. Heliotrope! 163 00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:57,120 Heliotrope is the right answer, we got there. 164 00:08:57,120 --> 00:09:00,760 Girasole and heliotrope, and they all mean the same thing 165 00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:05,240 because it was noted that the members of the sunflower family follow the course of the sun. 166 00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:09,600 - A lot of lizards are heliotropic as well. - Indeed they are. Absolutely right. 167 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:12,680 Because they're cold-blooded and they need the sun to warm them. 168 00:09:12,680 --> 00:09:14,480 Katie Price is Heliotropic. 169 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:16,000 LAUGHTER 170 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:19,080 I think... I think... 171 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:21,040 I think... 172 00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:23,360 - She is, yeah. - I think Harrow Road's... 173 00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:31,480 I think Harrow Road's Sun Parlour Tropic is not quite the same. 174 00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:34,240 I met her once, we were on the same breakfast TV programme. 175 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:36,840 And I said, "What are you here to talk about?" 176 00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:41,080 She said, "I've just published my autobiography." I said, "Oh, well done." 177 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:44,000 She said, "Yes, I'm looking forward to reading it." 178 00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:50,240 It's an odd thing about Jerusalem. 179 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:55,320 For some reason, it seems to attract things that just don't seem to be particularly connected. 180 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:58,280 There's a Jerusalem cherry, that's not a cherry. 181 00:09:58,280 --> 00:10:00,240 - It's a poisonous nightshade. - Wow. What? 182 00:10:00,240 --> 00:10:03,240 The Jerusalem cricket is not a cricket, it's another kind of insect. 183 00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:09,320 Jerusalem sage is not a proper sage. None of them is from Jerusalem. 184 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:14,320 So essentially you can put Jerusalem next to anything that isn't what it is and then it becomes fact? 185 00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:18,080 - Exactly, I'm wearing Jerusalem glasses. - And I'm a Jerusalem model. 186 00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:23,280 Mountain also has that. You've got mountain lions. 187 00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:25,000 The mountain cow is in fact... 188 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,480 Katie Price. 189 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:30,440 What a pity. 190 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:35,240 It's actually a tapir, one of those long-nosed South American... 191 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:38,640 - Messapia. - Anyway, we're ready to move on. 192 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:41,200 Why might my pockets smell of fish? 193 00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:56,560 They've done that thing where they take my body 194 00:10:56,560 --> 00:11:00,240 - and put it on the head of someone who looks a bit like me. - Ah, yes. 195 00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:01,680 I hate when they do that. 196 00:11:01,680 --> 00:11:06,000 God, that's like a dream I had last night! This is so weird. 197 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,200 It's not like a dream I've ever had. 198 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:12,920 But I mean, obviously, if you're a fisherman... 199 00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:15,360 But if you were a person of a high rank in society, 200 00:11:15,360 --> 00:11:18,240 a particular society, your pockets might smell of fish. 201 00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:20,920 - Oh. - The Fishmongers' Society. - Well, no. 202 00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:25,680 That's what I mean. Aside from the obvious professional reasons why you might smell of fish. 203 00:11:25,680 --> 00:11:31,360 - Oh, right. - It's a society in which it was considered polite not to eat, 204 00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:34,840 - but to pocket the fish at a banquet. - Is it Japanese, cos...? - Yes! 205 00:11:34,840 --> 00:11:37,680 - Cos fish, fish, they love fish. - Japanese is exactly right. 206 00:11:37,680 --> 00:11:40,320 Medieval Japanese society, at weddings and banquets 207 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:44,400 and other such things, it was right to drink the drink you were given, 208 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:48,640 but that you should take the fish, bring it up to your mouth and then tuck it away into your pocket. 209 00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:51,200 - I know it seems very odd. - What? 210 00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:53,080 It's just a social... 211 00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:55,960 I've done that with sausage rolls for the dogs later. 212 00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:58,560 We've all done it with certain things, I agree. 213 00:11:58,560 --> 00:12:02,240 But it is an interesting thing, and they still have a tradition in Japan, 214 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:03,640 when a baby is 100 days old, 215 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:07,640 is to take food, sea bream and beans and soya and rice, 216 00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:12,200 and wave it in front of the baby's face, but not let the baby eat it. 217 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:17,560 Wait a minute. So there's people dangling fish in front of babies? 218 00:12:17,560 --> 00:12:21,400 This is... Right, OK. What, on a fishing line? 219 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:24,560 No, no! From the food cupboard or the fridge, 220 00:12:24,560 --> 00:12:29,240 which in Japan would be filled with all kinds of different fish, as you can imagine. 221 00:12:29,240 --> 00:12:33,280 - I see, I see. Sashimi. - Sashimi and sushi and all kinds of other such things. 222 00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:36,520 - In fact, while on the subject of sashimi... - BILL: Weird, weirdos. 223 00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:39,600 - What is the difference between sushi and sashimi? - Sashimi is raw fish. 224 00:12:39,600 --> 00:12:42,640 And sushi is rice and seaweed and that kind of thing. 225 00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:44,160 Yes, it's rolled in rice. 226 00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:48,040 And the particular thing about sashimi is not just that it's raw fish, but that it's...? 227 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:50,360 - It's sliced. - It's sliced at an angle. 228 00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:54,480 Those huge knife skills are incredibly important in Japanese cuisine. 229 00:12:54,480 --> 00:12:58,400 This particularly used to be true in the medieval period. 230 00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:00,440 And in carp, for example, 231 00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:03,480 there were at least 47 different ways of cutting carp, 232 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:07,040 which represented different aspects of human life or activity. 233 00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:11,920 For example, there was departing-for-battle carp. 234 00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:16,080 So soldiers would have carp carved in a certain way before they went to battle. 235 00:13:16,080 --> 00:13:19,720 If they weren't told they were going to battle, the carp was the giveaway. 236 00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:23,080 Yeah, exactly. There was celebratory carp. 237 00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:26,400 - There was taking-a-bride carp. - Ooh! 238 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:31,680 - Flower-viewing carp. - No! Really? 239 00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:34,600 BILL: Warning carp. Look out, carp! 240 00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,440 Moon-viewing carp. 241 00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:41,640 So it was a very important part, obviously, of Japanese life, the way they prepared fish. 242 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:43,600 It's a wonderful art, obviously, 243 00:13:43,600 --> 00:13:46,360 and it's a very popular cuisine now around the world. 244 00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:49,920 I have an amusing joke that I always say when I'm in a Japanese restaurant - 245 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:52,720 bring me a various selection of things to drink, waiter, 246 00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:53,920 and don't get all sake. 247 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:55,520 Oh, you see! Hey! 248 00:13:55,520 --> 00:13:57,960 But what actually is sake? What is sake? 249 00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:02,080 - Rice...? - Rice wine. - Rice wine, you said, Alan? - Yes, rice wine? 250 00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:04,000 Alan came in first with rice wine. 251 00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,360 - He said it! - Yeah. 252 00:14:06,360 --> 00:14:09,520 - It is not rice wine. - Oh. - No. 253 00:14:09,520 --> 00:14:11,200 Is it from Jerusalem? 254 00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:16,800 The actual word "sake" simply means alcoholic drink. 255 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:20,720 But the sake we think of as sake is in fact a kind of beer. 256 00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:25,160 The word they use for the drink we call sake is "Nihonshu", 257 00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:28,840 which means Japanese liquor. Nihon, as in Nippon. 258 00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:31,640 Anyway, originally, people would just chew rice 259 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:33,240 and spit into a large container, 260 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:38,360 and the enzymes from the spittle would cause the breakdown of starch into sugars, 261 00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:41,480 which would cause the fermentation, which would make the sake. 262 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:44,840 So it is actually a strong beer, not a wine. 263 00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:48,480 - A wine is a fruit-based drink, usually grape, obviously. - BILL SIGHS 264 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:54,320 What other kinds of particularly Japanese things can you do to food to make it Japanese? 265 00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:56,040 - You can put it in tempura. - Tempura. 266 00:14:56,040 --> 00:15:00,280 Funny you should say that cos tempura was actually introduced to Japan, 267 00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:03,200 and I will give you ten points if you can tell me which nation 268 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:07,160 taught the Japanese to batter things, which is essentially what tempura is. 269 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:08,560 ALL: Scottish. 270 00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:11,000 You'd think, wouldn't you? You would think. 271 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,880 Surely there's a ginger-haired man somewhere, 272 00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:16,760 in one of those medieval scrolls, just going... 273 00:15:16,760 --> 00:15:20,520 - "Do you want to deep-fry that?" - Yeah. "That would be magic, it really would." 274 00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:22,720 - "Have we got any eggs?" - Oddly enough not, no. 275 00:15:22,720 --> 00:15:26,560 - It was the Portuguese. - Portuguese! - The Portuguese. 276 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:30,280 Also, the name vindaloo is originally from Portuguese origin, from Goa. 277 00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:32,760 Is it? I thought that was a French... 278 00:15:32,760 --> 00:15:36,520 - Vin de loo - toilet water. - Goa, as you know, was... 279 00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:37,560 But there you go. 280 00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:41,080 Anyway, so lots of interesting things about Japanese food. 281 00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:46,160 Now, what do people in Java use for a quick pick-me-up? 282 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:51,720 - Now, well. Ah. - SANDI: Not going to say. - Go on. 283 00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:54,720 - No. In for a penny. - Go on. 284 00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:57,000 - CAR ENGINE CHOKES - What was it? 285 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:04,400 - Oh, you are so canny. - Coffee. - Coffee, there we are. 286 00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:09,360 Coffee does not pick you up. You may think it does. 287 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:12,320 If you drink coffee regularly, you get withdrawal symptoms 288 00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:16,240 and all coffee does is put you back on the same level 289 00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,280 than a non-coffee drinker is on. 290 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:22,200 It doesn't speed your reflexes, doesn't help you concentrate, 291 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:25,800 doesn't do anything. It can cause anxiety. 292 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:30,160 - That's the worst of it. - Shocker. - It's a kind of wired anxiety, but it isn't is a pick-me-up 293 00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:33,560 - or an energiser. - Stimulus. - It's not a stimulant in that sense. 294 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:37,480 What most scientists recommend is that you either drink coffee regularly, 295 00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:40,880 in which case you satisfy your body's need and withdrawal symptoms, 296 00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:42,720 or you don't drink it at all. 297 00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:45,720 - The problem most people have... - They're not getting on, are they? 298 00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:50,240 ..is when they suddenly go on a bit of a coffee jag, 299 00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:54,000 go to a country that does very good coffee so they have a lot of ristretto 300 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,560 in Italy and then return to England, and then 301 00:16:56,560 --> 00:17:00,440 don't have any, then they have one again - that's what screws you up. 302 00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:01,840 - Anyway... - CAR ENGINE CHOKES 303 00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:03,880 - Yes, my dear? - Cocaine. 304 00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:10,760 You probably know that in Indonesia, the price for drug trafficking 305 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:15,680 - or being found is, essentially, death. - Yeah. 306 00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:18,720 There is a strange habit of doing something which is supposed 307 00:17:18,720 --> 00:17:21,080 to pick you up, supposed to cure you. 308 00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:24,360 Somebody tried to commit suicide because they had an illness. 309 00:17:24,360 --> 00:17:28,160 So they laid themselves down in a particular place, 310 00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:31,320 - in order to try and end their own lives. - Railway line. 311 00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:34,560 - A railway line is the right answer. - Ah. 312 00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:37,040 And they suddenly found that their illness went away 313 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:41,640 and this caused a rash of Javanese people... 314 00:17:41,640 --> 00:17:46,000 - lying on railway lines. - SANDI: How irritating. - Like so. Very irritating. 315 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:47,280 ALAN LAUGHS 316 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:53,920 The joke is that the power comes from the overhead lines. 317 00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:56,560 There is no electricity in the rails at all. 318 00:17:56,560 --> 00:17:59,200 I've never seen anyone look more serious than the woman 319 00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:01,680 - in the blue! - No, she... 320 00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:03,480 So presumably the pick-me-up part 321 00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:06,160 depends how fast the train's going. 322 00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,280 Whenever I see women like that I want to have a moustache 323 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:11,040 and twirl it. 324 00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:14,200 - Like a proper melodramatic villain? - Yes, just with a cape. 325 00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:15,400 Twirl your moustache. 326 00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:19,280 - And we know the music that goes with it. - Silent music. 327 00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:21,480 SANDI: That's the same as the washing up! 328 00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:24,080 Yes, it is. Multitasking! 329 00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:28,640 I could be washing up, I also... 330 00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:31,720 Washing-up whilst tying his wife to the railway line. 331 00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:33,360 Da-da-da-da-da-da... 332 00:18:33,360 --> 00:18:37,440 Oh, tricky one - cheese grater. 333 00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:41,880 - Cheese graters, they are tricky. - Brush. - No, no. 334 00:18:41,880 --> 00:18:46,000 - Use a brush. - I take them to the car wash, hold them out the windows. 335 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:49,960 Let their brushes take the strain! 336 00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:53,520 Another thing they do in Java which they do in other parts 337 00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:56,960 of the world, dangerous sport involving trains. 338 00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:59,560 - Do you know? - Playing chicken, running in front... 339 00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:00,720 - Running on the roof. - Yes. 340 00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:04,200 - Roof surfing, as it's known. There you can see. - Oh, my God. 341 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:07,000 That's not so much running as having a picnic. 342 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:10,360 There are so many of them. What they started to do was suspending, 343 00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:14,640 just at human head height, grapefruit-sized concrete balls 344 00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:17,720 so that people would - bang, like that! 345 00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:21,280 - In order to stop them... - Start with a grapefruit! 346 00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:25,680 - Then say... - No, they're tough in Java. Believe me. They are tough. 347 00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:27,520 But not that bright. 348 00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:32,280 I'm having a senior moment. The famous volcano near Java? 349 00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:33,720 - Krakatoa. - Krakatoa. 350 00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:36,680 - What's the name of the movie? - Um... 351 00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:39,000 - Krakatoa... - Erupts? - SANDI: East of Java. 352 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,680 East of Java, yes. 353 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:44,720 - And oddly enough, it's actually west of Java. - West of Java, yes. 354 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,200 It's an odd thing, but it was one of the first big Cinerama 355 00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:50,240 kind of movies, called Krakatoa East of Java. 356 00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:53,360 It was just a bizarre lie, because Krakatoa is west of Java. 357 00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:57,280 So some producer must have thought, "I don't like the sound of West of Java." 358 00:19:57,280 --> 00:20:00,680 "It's not going to sell. What can we do? We can take it north. North, south? 359 00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:02,680 "East! East, it's going to be fantastic." 360 00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:08,000 So, within ten years, tell me when this great huge explosion? 361 00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:09,920 - 1883. - 1883. 362 00:20:11,520 --> 00:20:15,480 Erm, 1882. 363 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:18,960 Right. 364 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:22,400 Ladies and gentlemen, viewers at home, 365 00:20:22,400 --> 00:20:25,080 - brace yourselves. - Oh, hello. 366 00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:30,920 The explosion, the great enormous, gigantic eruption of Krakatoa 367 00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:32,400 was in 1883. 368 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,480 I thank you. 369 00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:36,200 APPLAUSE 370 00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:40,280 - I saw a documentary about it. - May I just say... 371 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:44,280 ..W-T-F? 372 00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:48,360 There was a documentary about it on the BBC and they re-enacted it. 373 00:20:48,360 --> 00:20:51,960 Well, well remembered! I mean, it's not an easily, not particularly... 374 00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:53,840 I don't normally remember anything. 375 00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:56,800 It was the loudest sound, apparently, that has ever existed, 376 00:20:56,800 --> 00:21:00,120 or at least as far as we know, certainly within human reckoning. 377 00:21:00,120 --> 00:21:02,520 So, four atomic bombs is sort of the average... 378 00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:05,200 Oh, no! It was 13 times greater than the Hiroshima bomb. 379 00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:07,000 Oh, was it? Wow! 380 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:10,720 Five cubic miles of rock was spewed into the air, 381 00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:13,200 and it was heard 3,000 miles away. 382 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:16,040 You could actually hear it 3,000 miles away. 383 00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:17,480 - Pop. - And it... Yes! 384 00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:19,080 LAUGHTER 385 00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:22,480 That's what it sounded like in Australia. 386 00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:26,200 It reverberated around the world, the ripples of it, seven times. 387 00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:29,440 - It was a most extraordinary... - It was winter for years, wasn't it? 388 00:21:29,440 --> 00:21:35,720 Winter for years was actually another. That was an 1815 volcano. 389 00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:39,760 And it was known as the winter of 1815. You might know, I can tell. 390 00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:43,080 Those who don't know - Bill Bailey is a great friend of Indonesia, 391 00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:45,520 lives there, works there, plays gamelan. 392 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,880 - I do. - Does the whole thing. - The whole gamelan. - So you might know 393 00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:51,400 - this mountain. - It might have been Tambora. 394 00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:53,920 It was Mount Tambora. Well done. 395 00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:55,320 APPLAUSE 396 00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:02,280 It was called the year without a summer in 1815 and, in fact, 397 00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:06,880 about 100,000 people died of disease and famine, 398 00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:09,560 whereas the explosion of Krakatoa 399 00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:12,680 killed 36,000 people because it was an eruption. 400 00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:17,320 Wasn't Krakatoa... Was that the first global event 401 00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:20,360 that sort of was... The news of which spread around the world? 402 00:22:20,360 --> 00:22:23,480 Exactly. We can see behind us, Harper's Weekly. 403 00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:25,720 - It was a media event for the first time. - Yeah. 404 00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:30,720 - "The island and volcano of Krakatoa Strait of Sunda, submerged during the late eruption." - Yes. 405 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,200 When eventually a human party of people 406 00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:38,120 arrived at the site, at what was once a gigantic volcano 407 00:22:38,120 --> 00:22:41,040 that had just exploded, they found - 408 00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:46,200 and I'm including both vegetable and animal matter here - one living creature. 409 00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:49,680 And I will give you ten points if you can tell me the species. 410 00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:51,520 - Was it a spider that they found? - Yes! 411 00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:55,040 - It was a spider. - What's going on?! Everybody's brilliant. 412 00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,920 - APPLAUSE - Bravo. 413 00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:02,720 Absolutely marvellous. Everybody's on cracking form here. 414 00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:04,840 You really are doing superbly well. 415 00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:08,040 Was the spider going, "Ooh, it's hot"? 416 00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:09,560 It was indeed. 417 00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:12,840 It was using two legs at a time. 418 00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:14,760 - Anyway... - BILL: Like this. 419 00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:18,280 Ooh, ah! Ooh, ah! Ooh, ow! Oh, ah! Ooh, ow! Ooh, ow!, Ooh, ow! 420 00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:21,080 - So it was doing the washing-up! - Yes, it was. 421 00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:23,920 It's the Jerusalem washing-up spider. 422 00:23:23,920 --> 00:23:26,040 Anyway, moving on. 423 00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:28,840 So, what was the most hurtful thing Rambo's boyfriend did to him? 424 00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:37,360 Right. I've seen this film. It's a bootleg, it's very different from... 425 00:23:37,360 --> 00:23:41,400 - Rambo's boyfriend? - I'm being very naughty - the picture is being very naughty. 426 00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:46,120 - When I say Rambo, I really mean Rimbaud. - Rimbaud! 427 00:23:46,120 --> 00:23:48,360 So when I say Rimbaud, who do I mean? 428 00:23:48,360 --> 00:23:51,560 - You mean, of course, him. - But who is he? 429 00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:54,960 - Rimbaud. Somebody French. - SANDI: He looks off his head on something. 430 00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:56,800 - "Somebody French." - Arthur? - Arthur. 431 00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:59,000 - Arthur. - Rimbaud. - Rimbaud. 432 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,120 - Arthur Rimbaud, who was? - He was a great writer, wasn't he? - A poet. 433 00:24:02,120 --> 00:24:05,560 - A great poet, but very rare inasmuch as... - Got that right! Can't believe it. 434 00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:09,240 We're used to Beethoven and Mozart, and other musicians 435 00:24:09,240 --> 00:24:11,680 being extraordinarily prodigious at an early age. 436 00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:13,200 It's very rare for a poet. 437 00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:16,960 The greatest work that Rimbaud wrote, and he was a great poet, 438 00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:18,720 was between the ages of 17 and 21. 439 00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:23,560 He was extraordinarily beautiful. According to a school friend, 440 00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:27,440 "He had eyes of pale blue, irradiated with dark blue, 441 00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:31,120 "the loveliest eyes I've ever seen. He was a brilliant student. 442 00:24:31,120 --> 00:24:33,040 "He won a regional poetry competition, 443 00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:36,240 "in spite of sleeping through the first three hours of the exam." 444 00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:40,120 - SANDI: Oh, I've done that. - At 16, he ran away from home with no money, 445 00:24:40,120 --> 00:24:43,480 and then between the ages of 17 and 21, just four years, 446 00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:46,040 he had this extraordinary flowering as poet. 447 00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:48,520 But, in doing so, he shared his life with someone. 448 00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:53,320 He had a passionate, tumultuous affair with dot, dot, dot. 449 00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:54,560 Katie Price. 450 00:24:55,640 --> 00:25:01,200 His dates were 1854 to 1891. So he died at 36, 37. 451 00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:04,280 - And he was of a homosexual persuasion? - A child prodigy, he was gay. 452 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:06,960 Oh, well, don't know anything about those people. 453 00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:09,440 And in fact there is a blue plaque to him in London, 454 00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:12,960 where he shared a short-ish time with his lover, 455 00:25:12,960 --> 00:25:15,560 who was also a poet, a famous poet. 456 00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:18,880 - Oh. Gerard de Nerval. - No. 457 00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:22,000 - Gerard de Nerval was a fascinating man. - He was. 458 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:25,640 - I very much enjoyed the way you said that. - Je suis le veuf, 459 00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:29,240 - l'ancontre. Le tenebreux. - And he also famously had a pet lobster... 460 00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:33,240 - He did indeed. - ..that he used to take for walks on a lead. - Vite, vite, monsieur! 461 00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:38,680 - Monsieur Clicky. - Stay with it! Stay with it! 462 00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:39,960 Alors! 463 00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:41,920 Stay with it, because it's ... 464 00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:43,800 Non! 465 00:25:43,800 --> 00:25:46,000 - J'ai fatigue. - Non! Allez vite. 466 00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:49,000 ALAN CHOKES 467 00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:52,520 - L'eau, s'il vous plait. L'eau! - Non. 468 00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,840 Non, pas de l'eau. Non. Le artichoke. 469 00:25:56,840 --> 00:26:00,600 Le Jerusalem APPLAUSE 470 00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:06,280 I never thought I'd see the day 471 00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:11,000 when Bill Bailey force-fed Gerard de Nerval's lobster 472 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:14,200 with a Jerusalem artichoke, and yet the day came. 473 00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:16,560 Anyway, let's just return to this other poet, 474 00:26:16,560 --> 00:26:19,960 who was the lover of the young Verlaine. 475 00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:22,080 - Oh, sorry. - Verlaine! 476 00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:25,120 APPLAUSE 477 00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:29,040 Did I ever give that away! No. 478 00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:32,120 Now, there, on the left is Verlaine, 479 00:26:32,120 --> 00:26:34,800 - the one who looks slightly like John Malkovich. - Oh. 480 00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:37,920 - In the middle is the boy wonder. - Rimbaud. 481 00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:41,240 Rimbaud, and on the right is... Erm, I can't remember his name. 482 00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:43,880 - That's Robert De Niro, isn't it? - It is Robert De Niro, yes. 483 00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:45,600 It is a bit, isn't it, on the right? 484 00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:47,760 It's Robert De Niro, that's who it is. 485 00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:52,040 It's like a 19th-century ad for a hairdresser's, of all the different styles you can have. 486 00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:55,560 Is that the same person in that picture as it was in the one before? 487 00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:58,200 - It is. - Jeez. Air-brushing. - I know. 488 00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,280 But they went to live in Camden for a short while 489 00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:04,200 and there is a blue plaque in Camden that says, 490 00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:08,080 "Arthur Rimbaud and Paul Verlaine, poets and lovers, lived here." 491 00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:11,400 It was the first blue plaque to celebrate a gay couple, which is rather sweet. 492 00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:13,840 Anyway, that's the story of these two. 493 00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:20,520 Paul Verlaine wrote a poem of extraordinary international importance, whose opening lines are? 494 00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:23,440 # And did those feet 495 00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:25,480 # In ancient times... # 496 00:27:25,480 --> 00:27:27,440 No, I'll tell you what they are. 497 00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:29,600 # Walk upon England's... # 498 00:27:29,600 --> 00:27:31,520 Les sanglots longs de violons de l'automne 499 00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:34,440 Blessent mon coeur d'une langueur monotone... 500 00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:37,000 - SANDI: I didn't realise you wanted it in French! - No, no. 501 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:40,360 It seriously is internationally important, that poem. 502 00:27:40,360 --> 00:27:45,120 How can that be that those first lines changed history? 503 00:27:45,120 --> 00:27:48,800 - It's the internationale... - I will do it in a voice that might give you a hint. - OK. 504 00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:52,240 - DEEP BARITONE: - Les sanglots longs des violons de l'automne... 505 00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:56,040 - Yes? - It's the start of the Eurovision Song Contest. 506 00:27:56,040 --> 00:28:01,600 - As we know, Beethoven's 9th Symphony begins that... - Dammit! - No. 507 00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:05,560 - It was a code. - A code. A code to the resistance. - Yes! 508 00:28:05,560 --> 00:28:08,680 It was a code to the resistance that the D-Day landings were beginning 509 00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:11,720 and that the resistance should begin their sabotage. 510 00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:14,600 - That was the signal. - They went, "finally!" - Rather wonderful. 511 00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:18,120 So French hearts beat a little quicker when they hear these four words. 512 00:28:18,120 --> 00:28:20,640 What kind of camp person decided that was the code 513 00:28:20,640 --> 00:28:22,800 - they where going to use? - It's a very famous poem - 514 00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:25,520 it would be like saying "shall I compare thee to a summer's day?" 515 00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:28,240 Anyway, we thought you'd like to know about it, but why... 516 00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:30,240 BILL: Yes, quite interesting. 517 00:28:30,240 --> 00:28:33,320 The question was how did the lover hurt Rimbaud? 518 00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:35,560 - Shut his fingers in the door. - Yeah. 519 00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:38,840 - Worse than that, he had a tumultuous... - Oh, it does nip. 520 00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:43,840 - ..passionate, jealous rage and shot him in the wrist. - In the wrist? - Yes. 521 00:28:43,840 --> 00:28:45,440 Whilst he was masturbating. 522 00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:49,400 I'm going to move on, because you're just simply misbehaving. 523 00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:52,880 - Yeah, move on. - Yeah. - It's for the best. - Anyway. 524 00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:54,400 I am so out of my comfort zone. 525 00:28:56,120 --> 00:29:00,280 It's all good information that is well worth knowing. 526 00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:03,720 Arthur Rimbaud was shot in the arm by Paul Verlaine. 527 00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:06,760 Now, on to one of the delicacies of Jamaican cuisine, 528 00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:09,400 I think we all know how to make cock soup, 529 00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:12,120 but how would you make mannish water? 530 00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:13,960 Sorry, I don't know how to make cock soup. 531 00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:17,480 - I don't like cock soup. - I don't know what... - Cock-a-leekie. 532 00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:19,440 Oh, right! Oh, OK. 533 00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:21,240 Cock-a-leekie. 534 00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:24,800 - It's good, chicken soup. - Oh, I see. Is that what it is? 535 00:29:24,800 --> 00:29:28,240 - A cock is a chicken. - Cock is a chicken, yeah. 536 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:30,120 What can you have been thinking? 537 00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:35,080 I don't know, I thought it was some terrible euphemism. 538 00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:36,880 What, a euphemism for pheasant? 539 00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:39,480 I don't... Yes! Yes, that's it, pheasant. 540 00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:41,720 Well, cock soup is chicken soup. Cock-a-leekie. 541 00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:44,440 - Cock-a-leekie soup. - You've had cock-a-leekie in Scotland. 542 00:29:44,440 --> 00:29:47,440 - I have had cock-a-leekie. - Yes, you've had a leaky cock. Hey! 543 00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:48,720 No, shush and because... 544 00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:51,840 No, listen, now. Mannish water... 545 00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:53,400 SANDI LAUGHS UPROARIOUSLY 546 00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:56,640 It's like Frankie Howerd was in the room. 547 00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:59,520 - BILL & STEPHEN AS HOWERD: No, no. - No, don't. - Oh, no. - Stop it. 548 00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:02,240 - Shush! No. - Don't. - No. 549 00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:03,800 - Missus! - No. 550 00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:11,080 Big belly laughs from all men with big bellies and we'll have little titters from... No! 551 00:30:11,080 --> 00:30:14,240 - All right. Don't you remember that one? - Oh! 552 00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:17,440 Stop it! Mannish water... Come on, we're in Jamaica. 553 00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:19,040 - Mannish water. - Yeah. 554 00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:22,680 - Is it some kind of a soupage of some kind? - Yes. - It's a soupage. - Mannish water. 555 00:30:22,680 --> 00:30:24,080 It's Jamaican, is the point. 556 00:30:24,080 --> 00:30:27,560 - Right, so Jamaican food is what you're looking for? - Yeah. 557 00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:29,840 - Coconuts, plantains. - It's mannish, though. 558 00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:32,240 The point is they want to be male, so eat male animals. 559 00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:33,920 Oh, OK, so it's a... 560 00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:37,080 - And what food is common in... - Rice and peas. - Yes. 561 00:30:37,080 --> 00:30:39,920 - Rice and peas, flying fish. - Anything else? 562 00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:41,320 - Goat and... - Goat! Yes. 563 00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:43,200 - Entrails of goat. - That's it. 564 00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:47,080 So all the male parts of a goat - and a male goat is the important thing - makes mannish water. 565 00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:48,640 It's also called goat's head soup. 566 00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:51,840 Does the phrase goat's head soup mean anything to you? 567 00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:54,520 Er, yes, that I'm not hungry, is what it means. 568 00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:57,360 - Anything else? - It's an album, isn't it? - Thank you. 569 00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:59,840 Goat's Head Soup, by what's his name? 570 00:30:59,840 --> 00:31:02,040 - It's not his name, their name. - Oh, God! 571 00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:07,120 - The greatest rock 'n' roll band in the world, they call themselves. - The Proclaimers! 572 00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:11,680 And you can walk another 100 miles for... 573 00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:13,080 Oh, I love The Proclaimers. 574 00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:16,440 No, I'm very fond of The Proclaimers, but The Rolling Stones... 575 00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:21,200 - Rolling Stones! Rolling Stones. - In 1973, produced an album called Goat's Head Soup, 576 00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,280 because they recorded the album on Jamaica. 577 00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:26,600 And do you know why they recorded the album on Jamaica? 578 00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:29,400 - Island Records. - SANDI: Because they were mad for the soup. - No. 579 00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:33,400 Because it was about the only bloody country on Earth where they weren't banned from. 580 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:36,320 It was around the time of a lot of the drugs and all the rest of it, 581 00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:40,000 so they were allowed in Jamaica and made an album called Goat's Head Soup, 582 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,120 which is another word for mannish water. 583 00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:45,680 And its ingredients, should you wish to make it, are goat's head, 584 00:31:45,680 --> 00:31:48,560 feet and intestines, served with bananas and spices. 585 00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:51,960 It's supposed to be an aphrodisiac. It's supposed to man you up, 586 00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:54,240 that's the point. Hence mannish soup. 587 00:31:54,240 --> 00:31:56,880 There's also cow cod soup, made of bull's penis, 588 00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:59,640 chilli peppers and bananas, cooked in white rum. 589 00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:02,760 - Which sounds rather nice. - That is nice. - I like the sound of that. 590 00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:06,200 - I'll pop to Lidl in the morning. - Yeah. 591 00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:08,160 Anyway, that's mannish water for you. 592 00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:14,080 Where are fathers often barely older than their sons? 593 00:32:14,080 --> 00:32:15,520 Barely... 594 00:32:15,520 --> 00:32:18,720 When I say barely older, they can be only a day older than their son. 595 00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:22,960 - In the insect world. - No, I'm talking about humans. 596 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:24,040 - ALL: - Humans?! 597 00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:29,000 - It sounds impossible. - Adoptions. - Adoptions. 598 00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:33,360 And there is a country in which 98% of all adoptions... 599 00:32:33,360 --> 00:32:37,960 - are of adults, not of children. In which country? - Japan. 600 00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:41,080 And it begins with J. And it is Japan. 601 00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:45,480 And in Japan, it is very traditional to adopt 602 00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:49,840 an adult young man - aged between 25 and 30 is roughly the average. 603 00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:52,520 - So you have to find one without parents, presumably. - No! 604 00:32:52,520 --> 00:32:55,920 Oddly enough, you, as it were, adopt them from their own real parents. 605 00:32:55,920 --> 00:33:00,760 - Because you are rich and successful. - It's called stealing. - It sort of is. 606 00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:02,960 It's the transfer system. 607 00:33:02,960 --> 00:33:06,080 It is basically an open market transfer system. 608 00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:08,960 - It's like the Premier League. - And it is for the same reason. 609 00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:11,040 It is business. If your own son is a bit of a clod, 610 00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:13,320 and I'm afraid it is a male business this, 611 00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:17,280 and you run a business, and you want it to stay a family business, 612 00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:21,680 what you tend to do is adopt a young man who is very bright 613 00:33:21,680 --> 00:33:24,480 and you'll probably marry him to your daughter. 614 00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:27,000 There is a saying, "You can't choose your son, 615 00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:28,960 "but you can choose your son-in-law." 616 00:33:28,960 --> 00:33:32,040 You can adopt someone then marry them to your daughter? 617 00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:34,840 I know it's weird. But it is the Japanese way. 618 00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:37,200 - Wow. - That would take off in Norfolk. 619 00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:39,160 LAUGHTER 620 00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:42,200 So, for example, the current chairman of Suzuki, 621 00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:45,280 one of the largest corporations in Japan, 622 00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:47,680 is the fourth adopted son to have run the company. 623 00:33:47,680 --> 00:33:51,120 So he is a Suzuki, that is to say his father was someone 624 00:33:51,120 --> 00:33:55,240 who was adopted by someone who was adopted by someone who was adopted by a Suzuki. 625 00:33:55,240 --> 00:33:59,760 And they're not blood related, but they have become the adopted child. 626 00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:04,160 But there you are. Only 2% of adoptees in Japan are infants. 627 00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:09,240 - Right. - Only two, the rest, 98%, are males. - All males? - All males. 628 00:34:09,240 --> 00:34:12,680 And for that reason - to continue the line. 629 00:34:12,680 --> 00:34:15,680 - That's ongoing? - It's ongoing to this day. Absolutely. 630 00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:19,880 Now, here are two towns behind me. They both begin with J. Why are they blue? 631 00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:22,160 - Oh! Now, I know this. - Yes? 632 00:34:22,160 --> 00:34:25,160 - Well, I know one of them. - Go on, then. 633 00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:28,560 I've got a Smurf collection, I've had it many years. 634 00:34:28,560 --> 00:34:32,040 When I was younger, I used to collect Smurfs, it was my hobby. 635 00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:34,920 I've got a Smurf village, I created when I was younger, 636 00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:37,360 it's still there, reminds me of the bad times. 637 00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:39,960 - And the good times. - Right. 638 00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:43,560 Now, and if this is wrong, I'm going to look like a total twat. 639 00:34:43,560 --> 00:34:48,040 - The thing is, you'd look like a twat even if you're right. - Yeah. - Carry on, yeah. 640 00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:49,880 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 641 00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:53,400 No, because knowing this is so deeply sad. Yeah, carry on. 642 00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:56,040 OK, so I love Smurfs and everything about Smurfs 643 00:34:56,040 --> 00:34:58,400 - and Smurfette and everything else. - Yeah. 644 00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:01,200 When they did the premiere of the Smurf film, 645 00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:03,200 they painted a town somewhere - 646 00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:06,560 I think it was Spain, near Marbella, or something like that - 647 00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:08,480 blue, for the premiere of the film. 648 00:35:08,480 --> 00:35:11,400 And then afterwards they said, "We'll paint it back," 649 00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:14,120 and the residents had had such a lot of tourism, 650 00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:18,560 and they dubbed the mayor Papa Smurf, which he was delighted about! 651 00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:22,200 But they had a referendum to see if they wanted to keep their town blue, 652 00:35:22,200 --> 00:35:24,440 because they thought it was quite cool. 653 00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:26,680 And, cos that's Smurf, because it was Smurf Town, 654 00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:29,080 which sounds amazing, cos I love the Smurfs. 655 00:35:29,080 --> 00:35:32,520 - You are 100% correct! - Come on! 656 00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:34,400 APPLAUSE 657 00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:37,720 The only thing... 658 00:35:37,720 --> 00:35:40,720 The only thing that would add 20 points 659 00:35:40,720 --> 00:35:43,520 - was if you knew the name. - BILL: 20 points? Oh! 660 00:35:47,280 --> 00:35:49,120 Will you not destroy the set? 661 00:35:51,680 --> 00:35:53,560 Yes, you've broken it. 662 00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:56,480 - Just tell me the name of the town. - Juarez, was it Juarez? - No. 663 00:35:56,480 --> 00:35:59,560 No, that's in Mexico. We're talking about Spain. 664 00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:02,640 - Jojoba. - Jerez. - No, that's... - Jerez. 665 00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:05,160 - That's... - Jomin? - Juan. 666 00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:08,320 All right, it begins with "J". I'll give you that. 667 00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:09,880 Is it Jipswich? 668 00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:11,400 SANDI: Is it Jerusalem? 669 00:36:11,400 --> 00:36:13,280 It's not Jerusalem. 670 00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:14,720 Ji... Jiby. 671 00:36:14,720 --> 00:36:16,960 - No, it's called Juzcar. - ALL: Oh! 672 00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:19,440 The next thing I was going to say. 673 00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:23,360 Juzcar, spelt J-U-Z-C-A-R, Juzcar, with an accent on the U. 674 00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:26,280 Was the other town Jaipur? 675 00:36:26,280 --> 00:36:28,640 - Yes! Well done. - A point! 676 00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:32,640 No, no. No. Sorry. Whoa! I misheard you. 677 00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:35,880 - SANDI: It's Jodhpur. - Jodhpur is the answer. 678 00:36:35,880 --> 00:36:40,080 I still said it before Sandi, I still said Jodhpur before Sandi! 679 00:36:40,080 --> 00:36:43,560 - You did, you said the wrong thing. - No, no! I said Jodhpur, I still said Jodhpur. 680 00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:45,200 You're quite right, it's Jodhpur. 681 00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:48,480 So we're going to go back to a picture of Jodhpur. Why is Jodhpur blue? 682 00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:51,480 - SANDI: It's to do with the caste system. - Yes. 683 00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:54,400 It's to do with indigo, indigo being the colour of the Brahmin. 684 00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:57,080 The Brahmin, which is the highest caste. 685 00:36:57,080 --> 00:37:00,200 It was to distinguish their houses and everybody thought it a good idea. 686 00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:03,840 There is also a pink city. Can you name a pink city? 687 00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:05,400 - Jaipur. - Yes! 688 00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:07,760 APPLAUSE 689 00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:09,040 There you go. 690 00:37:10,720 --> 00:37:13,880 And there it is. There we are. It was built in pink stone 691 00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:16,600 and it was painted pink for a very particular reason. 692 00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:18,880 - I wonder if you can... - Prince Albert, wasn't it? 693 00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:22,120 Yes, Prince Albert Edward, who later became Edward VII. 694 00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:25,600 He was coming to visit and they thought, "Let's paint it pink." 695 00:37:25,600 --> 00:37:29,200 In the 1870s, painted it pink in his honour. Anyway, there we go. 696 00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:33,320 Jodhpur and Juzcar are both painted blue, one by tradition, 697 00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:35,360 the other for a Smurfs film. 698 00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:40,080 Now, what would you keep in a 14-tonne jar with no lid? 699 00:37:40,080 --> 00:37:41,520 - Biscuits! - Yeah. 700 00:37:41,520 --> 00:37:43,920 Biscuits. A lot of biscuits. 701 00:37:43,920 --> 00:37:47,160 - A lot. - 14-tonne jar. - 14-tonne jar... 702 00:37:47,160 --> 00:37:50,680 - I have difficulty imagining how big that would be. - Vast. 703 00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:55,600 14 tonne is heavy, but it's only... It's only six or seven lorries. 704 00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:57,640 Well, six lorries. Well, four lorries. 705 00:37:57,640 --> 00:37:59,960 - It depends how big the lorry is. - Yes. 706 00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:03,200 - You know... - Jam. 707 00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:06,560 You get a two-tonne truck, so if you're talking about a 14 one... 708 00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:09,360 - Jam. - It's not a jam jar, no. It's a jar. - BILL: Tadpoles. 709 00:38:09,360 --> 00:38:12,120 They're known as a jar to archaeologists, 710 00:38:12,120 --> 00:38:14,000 - if that's any use to you. - Ah, yes. 711 00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:15,560 I did archaeology at university 712 00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:18,400 and there's quite a lot of things we don't know what they're for. 713 00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:20,400 - Yes. - And I think this is one of those. 714 00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:23,560 - Might you be able to place it on the map? - I think it's in Laos. 715 00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:27,080 You are damn well spot-on. I am so impressed with you lot today. 716 00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:30,920 Although you've been occasionally just a little bit facetious, 717 00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:35,360 you have also come up with some stonkingly correct answers. 718 00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:38,120 What they now think, no-one knows what they were for, 719 00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:39,640 Marco Polo described them. 720 00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:42,120 And we now think they're for making goat's head soup. 721 00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:44,840 - LAUGHTER - You're absolutely right. 722 00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:48,800 They're on the plains of Laos and they are made of granite 723 00:38:48,800 --> 00:38:51,880 and they are human made. No-one knows how they made them. 724 00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:54,160 Granite is not an easy stone to work with. 725 00:38:54,160 --> 00:38:59,200 You make a nice kitchen surface for it, for slicing, slicing... 726 00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:00,680 Slicing. 727 00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:05,200 - Writing. - Writing. - Buying things on eBay. 728 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:10,600 Anyway, there are 90 sites, each containing up to 400 of these jars. 729 00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:14,280 And, as you rightly say, we don't really know what they're for. 730 00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:17,880 The assumption is dead bodies were put in there, allowed to decompose, 731 00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:20,320 then taken out and cremated 732 00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:23,320 and it was something to do with the journey of the dead. 733 00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:26,880 But you always have to allow for the soul of even very early people 734 00:39:26,880 --> 00:39:32,360 and maybe they thought, "If I make a very big container, the gods will fill it for me with bounty." 735 00:39:32,360 --> 00:39:35,400 - Absolutely. - We would always allow for the dream element. 736 00:39:35,400 --> 00:39:36,440 Absolutely right. 737 00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:39,400 There is often a functional fallacy. There is always an assumption 738 00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:43,640 things are done for a specific practical reason, which isn't always true. The soul is... 739 00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:47,600 It's like the cargo cults in Papau New Guinea who built whole runways. 740 00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:50,000 The missionaries came and they had all this stuff. 741 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:52,840 And the indigenous people said, "What is it?" They said, "Cargo." 742 00:39:52,840 --> 00:39:56,120 They said, "Where does it come from?" "Sydney," meaning Australia. 743 00:39:56,120 --> 00:39:59,840 And they developed a God called Sydney and they made whole runways 744 00:39:59,840 --> 00:40:03,120 in the jungle, waiting for Sydney to bring them cargo. 745 00:40:03,120 --> 00:40:05,800 So you might find a runway and think, "What landed here?" 746 00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:09,000 Nothing did, except your dashed dreams. 747 00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:11,920 - Yeah. Beautifully put. - Perhaps that's the case with the jars. 748 00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:13,400 I think that's beautifully put. 749 00:40:13,400 --> 00:40:16,760 The most honest archaeologists say they don't know how they were made 750 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,840 or exactly what they were for. Your guess is as good as mine 751 00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:23,760 and yours seems to me to be a very rational and realistic one. 752 00:40:23,760 --> 00:40:27,640 - There also may be a corresponding set of stolen lids... - Yeah. 753 00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:31,520 Somewhere! 754 00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:35,800 Anyway, d'you know the capital of Alaska? 755 00:40:35,800 --> 00:40:38,320 - SANDI: Yes, you just said it. - Exactly. Thank you. 756 00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:41,960 Very good! Juneau is the capital of Alaska. 757 00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:44,160 - J-U-N-E-A-U. - Ah, Juneau. 758 00:40:44,160 --> 00:40:46,560 But there's something unique about it. 759 00:40:46,560 --> 00:40:50,560 - It rains all the bloody time, I know that. - Well, it's not accessible by road. 760 00:40:50,560 --> 00:40:54,000 You can only get there by air or water. There is no road to Juneau. 761 00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:57,560 - Sarah Palin can get there by walking on the water. - Well, yes. 762 00:40:59,200 --> 00:41:02,600 Can you tell me the biggest joke ever to come out of Alaska? 763 00:41:02,600 --> 00:41:05,120 Sarah Palin, who can walk on... 764 00:41:05,120 --> 00:41:09,000 Ohhh! Dear, oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear. 765 00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:11,640 APPLAUSE 766 00:41:14,360 --> 00:41:15,960 We're not forfeiting you that, 767 00:41:15,960 --> 00:41:19,000 it was so obvious that we weren't even going to forfeit it. 768 00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:20,360 Isn't she lovely? 769 00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:24,280 - If I had forfeited, I would have refudiated. - We would have refudiated. 770 00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:28,120 Anyway, the point is, there is actually a famous practical joke, 771 00:41:28,120 --> 00:41:30,120 an April fool's joke that came out of Alaska. 772 00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:32,800 It took a lot of preparation and was rather extraordinary. 773 00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:34,680 Here's a photo that might give you a hint. 774 00:41:34,680 --> 00:41:38,200 I mean, it's not going to be easy, but what's in the background there? 775 00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:41,080 - This is a volcano-based practical joke. - Yes. 776 00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:44,880 And it's one that I read about and it very much impressed me 777 00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:48,440 because if you do a practical joke which is, you know, 778 00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:51,480 clingfilm over the toilet, something simple... 779 00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:53,680 But the person who did this practical joke... 780 00:41:53,680 --> 00:41:55,480 LAUGHTER 781 00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:58,880 It's a good one. It doesn't work for women necessarily, 782 00:41:58,880 --> 00:42:02,080 cos we tend to notice when we sit down that there's something, 783 00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:04,080 but for men, I tell you, it's a hoot. 784 00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:08,120 There was a volcano, and a gentleman, 785 00:42:08,120 --> 00:42:11,320 - and I can't remember his name, I apologise. - Don't you worry. 786 00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:15,960 Decided to try and make it seem as if it was erupting, so took loads of tyres... 787 00:42:15,960 --> 00:42:20,000 - You are class. - ..and set fire to it and then everyone came out of their houses and went, 788 00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:21,360 "The volcano's erupting!" 789 00:42:21,360 --> 00:42:24,480 - Yes. - Cos it was so good. - You're absolutely right. 790 00:42:24,480 --> 00:42:27,720 He waited three years until there was a clear April 1st. 791 00:42:27,720 --> 00:42:30,280 He took kerosene and smoke bombs and tyres, 792 00:42:30,280 --> 00:42:33,400 and he dropped them down the crater and set fire to it. 793 00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:37,600 But, in 50-foot letters, he did say, "April Fool" 794 00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:40,240 and he warned the federal authority. 795 00:42:40,240 --> 00:42:43,640 He called them up, but he forgot to call the coastguard, who did panic a bit. 796 00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:46,200 But it was, fortunately, all taken in the right spirit. 797 00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:49,760 - And his name was Porky Bickar. - Porky. - Porky? 798 00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:51,520 Porky - that was his nickname. 799 00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:54,720 - He was American, so he was called Porky. - Porky Bickar. 800 00:42:54,720 --> 00:42:58,480 And that is, aside from Sarah Palin, the greatest joke ever to come out of Alaska. 801 00:42:58,480 --> 00:43:00,280 It is a good one. It is a good one. 802 00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:03,360 I have to say I am very impressed again with your knowledge. 803 00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:05,520 And that's the end of tonight's questions. 804 00:43:05,520 --> 00:43:08,080 Let's see how our journey has panned out. 805 00:43:08,080 --> 00:43:11,880 Well, it's astonishing! Her first ever appearance, on plus 15, 806 00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:14,240 a clear winner - Susan Calman. 807 00:43:14,240 --> 00:43:17,200 APPLAUSE AND CHEERING 808 00:43:18,960 --> 00:43:24,400 And only four inches behind on 11 - 809 00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:25,960 Sandi Toksvig. 810 00:43:25,960 --> 00:43:28,040 APPLAUSE AND CHEERING 811 00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:31,080 And... 812 00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:36,480 impressively, the digitally endowed, still in the black, plus four - Bill Bailey. 813 00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:39,600 APPLAUSE AND CHEERING 814 00:43:39,600 --> 00:43:41,760 I'm delighted. 815 00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:45,760 Well, perhaps the best we can say is, bless him, he did try. 816 00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:48,000 Minus eleven - Alan Davies. 817 00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:50,720 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 818 00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:57,480 That's all from Sandi, Susan, Bill, Alan and me. 819 00:43:57,480 --> 00:44:00,480 Thank you, good night and be wonderful to each other. Bye-bye.