Today we sally forth upon a quest with our night's quadruple all hail the valiant and
mighty sir Philip the jupiter and audacious Alan Decar lady Alice Levine and the night
on the tiles Alan Davis list G to their nightly noises sir Philip the jupiter's
goes so Alan Decar goes and prepare for combat. I can't actually move with this. It looks nice
on you weirdly. Halfway through the show he's gonna go oh I feel drained.
Wind machine on him. With his head out the car window. How do they wear glasses in the olden days?
They hadn't invented glasses in the olden days darling. I'm gonna struggle on this show.
I was given to understand there was a bee keeping round. Oh I'm from Amsterdam would
you like some lovely cheese? Shall we start the show and do a quest? So what's this man's name?
Is it Don Quixote? Darling. Don Quixote. The X is a ch sound isn't it? Well the X is a ch
technically because he's speaking old Castilian in the book and it should be Don Quixote.
Quixote. But I think we could say Quixote don't you think? Is Don short for something like Donald or Donner?
No it was more of an honorary title. Really? Like the Don? Yeah like the Don yeah. But Quixote
that sounds like an Irish order doesn't it? I love Quixote. Actually technically he's not
called any of those things because the protagonist in the book is called Alonso Chiano. So Don
Quixote is a name he makes up for himself when he loses his marbles and assumes the
character of a medieval knight. Lots of people argue it is the world's first modern novel. Where
do they argue? In the literary world my darling. Oh. He wrote this in prison actually which
used to be a good place to write a book and it was an immediate and roaring success. So the
question is why might Elizabeth the first not have read it? She could read couldn't she?
Do you know what she could read in six languages? Is she like beach reads? Like the kind of big paperback?
Danielle Steele. What's the one thing that we know about Elizabeth the first? Didn't she lose all her teeth?
Yes that wasn't the thing I was looking for but yes that is uh
but I based my act on her. What is the big event in history that uh Elizabeth the first? To do with
the Spanish isn't it? Yes yes. The Armada. Spanish Armada. So she wasn't reading a lot of
Spanish. Oh no uh Tarantiz was a buying agent for the Spanish Armada. Very good pronunciation
of Tarantiz.
But actually that thing that you were doing there that is a little bit like Elizabeth the first
when she lost all her teeth apparently. The foreign ambassadors couldn't understand her and
she obviously because she was queen she carried on chatting. If she's anything like my nan I'll
tell you what Queen Elizabeth the first was saying.
In the novel itself Don Chirwuthy goes mad because of reading. It used to be believed that reading
or what they called excessive contemplation was incredibly bad for you and it caused the most
astonishing range of illnesses. So if you read too much you could get all of these things
according to Dr Robert Burton. Gout catars. Wasting indigestion colic crudities. Vertigo
consumption and wind. All caused by reading too much. It's like the menu in a gastropub.
I feel like I'm in an exciting new hipster coffee bar.
The top 10 names in England in 2035. Yes gout and wasting are at camp but colics at home.
And I just say though it's so nice to be with another Alan because Alan
they're like the white rhino. They're going extinct. There's only me you and Alan Titchmouse
going. Did you know that? There's no other Alan. You think with me being on the telly
there'd be a few more but sadly not. I love you very much Alan but I think you being on
television is not going to encourage the breeding of children. I know it's your first
time on. I'll be very kind and very lovely. Why don't you stamp on me glasses while you're at it.
Collective for Alan's is I wonder what though. A pride. A pride.
You happy with that darling? Yeah. Okay fantastic.
Padavantis himself had quite an adventurous life. He was in the Spanish
army during which he got shot three times. Well he's got a sword in him there.
Oh yes there's not. I'll kill you Ryan don't worry. He lost the use of his left arm. He was
kidnapped and held captive as a slave for five years. He was arrested three times. He
was excommunicated three times. I mean he really had the most astonishing life. Is he from Albert
Square? That's the sort of scene in the extenders all of those bad things happen to you. Nasty Nick.
Now his death date is recorded as the 23rd of April 1616. It is the same date as Shakespeare
and yet they died 10 days apart. How is that possible? You're lying. Yes.
10 points. No. 23rd of April we celebrate St George's Day and Shakespeare's birthday 1616.
So Shakespeare famously died on his birthday. So the same day they are marked down as dying
and yet they died 10 days apart. How is that possible? Is it that calendar they use? It is
that calendar they use. Is it Julian calendar? Yes darling. Which is also my drag name.
Europe was using the Gregorian calendar and England was still using the Julian calendar
and so the dates are very slightly apart. Also in Spain the date of death was recorded as the
day you were buried rather than the day you actually died. Now what's the most thankless job
in history? It was being a mum surely. Don't try and get the mum vote.
We have to say thank you to mum in our house. We won't get any biscuits.
What's the worst job you ever had? I put the raisins into fruit and fibre.
Did somebody else do the apple bits? You were only in charge of the raisins.
Yeah they came in a big box. I didn't put them in individually. Wish I'd gone to school.
I was once working at a record company and someone had a record out with a lyric in it
that mentioned Mr Potato Head and so I was asked as a promotional device to carve faces
into a hundred potatoes. Most thankless job in history comes from ancient China so we're going
to go back to 400 to 100 BC and there were people called Yusha and they were on a constant
quest to rescue anybody in trouble and to help the poor but they hated being thanked
because they were too modest. In fact it was part of their fundamental beliefs that you
should never receive praise so they are almost the equivalent of the night errants which is what
Don Quixote was. But were they really modest or were they like no please don't please don't.
They had codes of chivalry so there was one called Chuchia and he saved hundreds of people's
lives but whenever anybody thanked him he couldn't bear it even when he saved a king's
life he refused to ever see him again just in case he was thanked. It was absolutely
part of who they were. There's a period of time in China it's the 250 year period of warring states
and lots of dynasties were fighting for control. In the end the dynasty called
Qin finally won that's q-i-n and that is where China gets its name from from the Qin
dynasty so you can see this area down here on the left that only lasted for about 15 years
but in these times of untrustworthy government instability people turned to these more
self-sacrificing Yuxia knights to dispense justice instead. Actually the Chinese made a TV
series called Yuxia and it was based on an American television series can anybody imagine
what it might have been? Starcian Hatschuk. Well you've got it in that the car is critical.
They actually made a real version of the car from Knight Rider in China and they sold it
it was called the Yuxia and the operating system was called kit yes name of Hasselhoff's car
and it featured all the sort of leds mimicking the ones from the show who doesn't want one of
those thing about kit was though he's really sassy so he would always tell michael that he
was wrong oh but i'd really like that if there was like a sat nav that spoke back to you i
think that would be rather good fun if what if it said do you want to go to sainsbury's are
surely waitress is more your style
i quite like i think being the voice of sat nav sas nav you can record your own can you
yeah i had a tom tom i did it on that how long does that take do you have to record
every road ever he's been doing it for nine years this week he's been doing
lithium villagers where's alan in the shed like oh god grove avenue grove street
it's uh you know you just go turn left but because it's you you can go turn left
left now no wait have you just done turn left in lots of different moods
you can have done all the different things in different moods yeah but can you do
mine that bus that doesn't tell you to mine that one that is the children
i like you have reached your destination and you haven't
i'd rather it just said i think it's here somewhere
it's a bit non-committal like yeah we could yeah it's round here
have a look get out and look what don't you buy a map buy a map
anyway moving on what's the lowest camping experience you can think of
oh my god i was there that year where is that that's glastonbury 2006 or seven that was the
year when there were police divers um going into the tents looking for bodies oh they didn't
find any so it's all right it looks like a cross between camping and a soup from wagamamas
i went to glastonbury once yeah and i got absolutely paralytic i i woke up on the floor
someone must have trodden on me because i had two footprints and someone had stubbed a fag
out on my face annoying can i be if i'm lying on the floor i'm talking about the lowest
campsite in the world it is 1.6 kilometers down inside the deepest cave on earth is in georgia
the krubera cave it is obviously not open to your average camper ah this is a genuine picture
from the inside of the cave it is 13 kilometers long it is over two kilometers deep and it can
fill with water really fast with absolutely no warning whatsoever nevertheless people go
camping down inside this cave so in 2018 56 cavers from seven different countries spent
four weeks down inside they were sleeping six to a tent and for fun they would dive down into
sumps which are sort of freezing they're freezing cold passages submerged underwater
and squeeze as far as they could down these extremely narrow passageways four weeks can you
imagine how much is it for a family of four it's not for me what do you mean it's not
for you you're a perfect size for underground living i can't get in that corridor where's sandy
sandy get down there will you tell us there's any sumps you like stuart little we get your
little car go and find find the interesting things underground sandy and make sure you come
back we'll have a lovely bit of cheese for you so i was listening to that flight of fancy
and he went cheese and i thought i would come back from the deepest point of the cave is
called the terminal sump oh dear nobody knows how deep it is i've got one of those
only my doctor knows where it is well i know a ukrainian diver who could go and have a look
and he holds the record for the deepest dive so far 52 meters down to the terminal sump why
would you do that i do not want to go any further down here sandy sandy go further
oh
the thing i love about this cave is the deepest terrestrial animal ever found on earth lives
there it's a hexapod three millimeters long just a tiny little thing it's called a plutomorus
autoballaginensis and it lives at nearly 2000 meters down do you not think that's
astonishing that life is carrying on it's not camping it's living there full time i like
the element oh are you looking at the same picture i didn't really think you think it
looks ugly alice but you wait till you've seen sandy doing dressage on one
they're too heavy for it it does look like it's oh why have i got these
they put them back yes just needs a bit of product or a scrunchy yes
camping is a pastime first documented where do i reckon early victorian early victorians
it's british so yeah it is the victorians absolutely loved it there was a great boating
craze so it was up and down the tems and some boats even converted into floating tents the
person we have to blame is a british tailor called thomas hyrum holding he is regarded as
the sort of father of lightweight camping as a boy in 1853 he and his family went across
the united states by pioneer wagon across the prairies and he absolutely loved it and has
inflicted on the rest of us for the all eternity that we have somebody that wears a
pussy bow is not genuinely camping like i feel like they he's got an inflatable mattress in there
he's got heaters he's got a hot water bottle well he did a little me he rather hilariously
produced the camper's handbook and under meal suggestions he provides recipes for blancmange
and lobster salad just come out in a vegetarian cookbook in the 80s and had a crisp sandwich
in it it's not much of a tent is it but he has road there on dry land which is quite impressive
tides out
you say there's not much of a tent he sold it to e or just after this photo
camping these days can get seriously intense
oh okay moving from the deepest quest on earth to the highest what do everest
summitors come down with i was offered the chance to walk to base camp and i did one
day's training on hamster teeth and declined they say hamster teeth harder so you have to
talk to the dog walkers but there's only a fortnight in may and a fortnight in october
when you can even go to the top and the rest of the it's 400 mile an hour winds and minus
60 oh why would anyone go up there i thought you're gonna say it's all school groups
if you do get permission to go you have to queue and people get really bad tempered
there are many fights that break out as people are waiting what do they come down
with a black eye by the sounds of it if everyone's like or a fridge magnet something
like that
one of those pens with something that's like a climber
well there's a surfer in a bra
sir edmund wow you could see his hillary the best ones don't call it ever as they call it
tumalanga and they employ in fact 30 porters their sole job is to carry poo down the mountain
yes to special pits further down the mountain you're not allowed to leave your poo up there
well no in fact if you do climb up now the nepalese government they require you to bring
down 18 pounds of rubbish uh that includes other people's poo or you will lose your four
thousand dollar deposit just over 26 000 pounds of human excrement is dumped at base camp
will the poo ever overtake we can do this for comic relief
but the nepalese porters who carry it all down they are astonishing they they use something
called a numlo it's a sling that goes across the forehead and on average the male porters
can carry 90 percent of their body mass and there's female porters as well they can
carry 66 percent there's one porter who can carry twice his own body weight hillary went
back to the himalayas lots of times after climbing everest he led an expedition
he led an expedition to look for the abominable snowman he concluded that it didn't exist no no
but the nepalese government has yeti hunting rules you have to pay for a permit it's the
first thing you have to photograph or capture it you're not allowed to kill it and you
have to turn it over or turn over the photographs of any sightings whatsoever i like
the idea that edmund hillary's there at the press conference and this is what we're looking
for and there's a bunch of sherpas in front of the gap oh you mean keith
he said and you see no hat the yeti or the center parting do you think they saw lots of
ones with little side parties like that's not the one i'm looking for
if we cannot find the yeti we will settle for the lead singer of herman's hermits
from mountains to cliffs how did the first ever cliffhanger ending conclude with somebody
falling off a cliff or somebody not falling off a cliff where do we think it comes from
the idea of using a cliffhanger in a story well as from serial storytelling was it dickens
this is a famous british author who first came up with this test the devils dude oh
obscure thomas hardy did it is thomas hardy thomas hardy wrote a novel in 1873 called a
pair of blue eyes and one of the characters henry knight is left dangling perilously
off the edge of a cliff and his love interest elf reader she realizes that he's in some
terrible trouble and this is rather shocking and daring at the time she goes and takes
off all her underwear in a bush and makes it into a rope and saves his life makes her bush
into a rope
this is it test the devils there's a wonderful line and it's dark and she's walking along
and she suddenly felt a huge erection in her front and it turns out to be stonehenge
wow the metaphorical cliffhanger so uses a literary device is much much older so the
arabian 1001 nights is in the story from the eighth century of sherezade and she tells a
story every night to avoid being killed and she always ends it so that the king wants to
find out what happens next is there one in the bible what is the story in the cliffhanger
with mary when she tells joseph that he's not the father of the kid and it like
yes he's not my son no
that's a cliffhanger that isn't it yeah but i like the doom that's what i think
you're so right it is better with it it is much better previously in the bible
oh you mentioned uh cereals what did you mean coca-pops in newspapers and and okay
there were serial films in the early 20th century that would be shown once a week usually on a
saturday morning and then they would continue on from the last and episodes tended to have
some kind of suspenseful scene that would then resolve the following week the most successful
of these probably 1914's the perils of pauline that does have a literal cliffhanger in it in
episode six with pauline the protagonist clinging halfway down a cliff but there's
an effect called the zigharnik effect and cliffhangers take advantage of this
people can remember uncompleted or interrupted tasks better than they can remember completed
ones so there was a psychologist working in 1927 bluma zigharnik she was the very first
russian woman ever to attend university and she studied this phenomenon after her professor
noticed that a waiter had better recollections of unpaid orders than paid ones and she found that
people will remember an interrupted task about 90 better than something that is uninterrupted
in a cliffhanger context you remember the story better and you're more invested in it
if the scene is left unresolved now how did britain's greatest national treasure get here
taxi what do you reckon what britain's greatest national treasure crown jewels it is to do with
the crown jewels the cullinan diamond world's largest diamond ever found like a molar
it's about the size of an orange so if you imagine the average diamond is about the size
of a seed and you compare that to the cullinan diamond it was absolutely massive it was
discovered in 1905 in the cullinan mines in south africa probably the most valuable object
in the world at the time now as you said is in the crown jewels and so obviously they want to
get it to london but did they just someone have to pocket it well what they did was they wanted
to make sure that it was safe so they rather ceremoniously put it in a package and they
locked it inside the safe of a steamboat there was a team of detectives and all those things
making sure this huge thing was absolutely safe in fact that package was a decoy and the
diamond arrived in london safe and sound by a registered post don't you love that they
stick a stamp on it be all right i'm very glad that you said that because i just imagined
the poor man walking all the way down the mall going oh god delivery for the coin
it was taken immediately to king edward the seventh to inspect in fact the diamond went
unsold for two years and the government of transvaal eventually they bought it
after the equivalent of 15 million pounds today and they wanted to give it as a gift
to the king but the government wasn't sure but churchill was the colonial secretary and
he said absolutely we need to take this and because everybody was so grateful in transvaal
to him for doing this churchill was given a replica he used to put it on a silver plate
and show it off at dinners to guests i like the idea that you take it to the king and the king
would inspect it but i mean i'm presuming he doesn't know loads about no diamond i mean
what's he looking for i don't know i would have taken it to david dickinson
he knows a bit more to me well that hs samuel
is that a good one of course you did have to find somebody who was good with diamonds and the
people who really knew about it was the asher brothers in amsterdam and again they made a big
song and dance out of it the royal navy took a box across the north sea in fact abraham asher
took the diamond put it in his pocket and caught the train and went by train and ferry
all the way tickets please oh shit
his brother joseph studied the diamond and he planned the cut for weeks and weeks and weeks
four days before making the initial groove he he did a thing with the cutting knife and the
knife broke rather than the diamond i mean it really was a massive thing he spent nine
months cutting it into nine major diamonds and 96 what they call what do you want it to say
how do you spell it so cullinan's one which is the great star of africa that is at the top of the
scepter and cullinan's two is in front of the imperial state crown they're the major components
that ruby there is black prince's ruby the largest one in the world not cut properly just
give it a bit of a polish now on to the quest for true love who would be interested in this
dating profile stocky build short bald bolivian male moderate drinker never been in a previous
relationship definitely wants children that's basically me is it a human no obviously it's
not a human all bolivian yes creature beginning with a q it doesn't begin with a q
well it's in the wrong series it is but we are on a quest to find this creature a mate it
is a frog a frog so this is a very sweet story okay this is a story of romeo a sewencus
frog so he has been living in a tank in bolivia in the kochambamba natural history museum
and it was thought that romeo was the last one in his species so the last one of species
is called an endling and in 2018 his conservation has set up an online dating profile
for him on match.com in an effort to find him a mate and here is the video
that they made for their search hi there i'm romeo a sewencas water frog from bolivia
i'm a pretty simple guy i tend to keep to myself and love spending nights at home
i also love eating then again who doesn't oh who could resist right who could resist
they're good friends to do that didn't want to do it himself yeah
miguel could you do a video for me
i have the tiny arms of the frog he is not possible for me to hold the phone
in the world you want me to say
right it's not a big piece of pepper behind your phone
the thing is it worked loads of frogs started turning up
went out on a frog finding expedition they found three males and two females and he has now
been paired with a female who they have obviously named juliette exactly right see
because i'm called romeo this photograph was taken of me at my modern jazz dance class
dancing bolivia must never smile what's wrong about romeo's personality as they put
him with juliette she's really energetic she loves to swim she eats a lot she keeps trying
to escape and she is driving me on the wall climbing out of the tank yeah he's eating my
arms he's very shy he doesn't like her there's no such thing as shyness
that's an affectation he doesn't like her and he's acting as if he's shy
i want a different one this is your one there are other animal dating
apps there is a dating app called tudder does anybody know what that might be for cows it is
for cows it was launched in early 2019 and you can browse cattle from all over the uk
to find a suitable mate for your livestock you're going to request either cows or bulls
and you do literally swipe left or right find someone that looks at you the way that that
freesia is looking at me honestly apparently andy murray is invested in tudder i don't know
why you thought that's not true is it yeah that is a true thing yes why i don't know
the i don't know the workings of his mind i don't know if you're aware but i recently had
an artificial hip put in so i need to find new avenues of uh revenue
i thought cow dating i was on a lot of painkillers anything like him at all
yeah but i sound a little like the bull the frog was in the room but i don't know who this
float is andy murray i won't wumble them
he certainly physically resembled him anything left or right with uh i think they get the farm
speaking of breeding who has the world's most sinister genitals
in attendance or in the world in the world the most sinister sinister as in to the left
exactly latin for left so in 2017 there was a snail called jeremy who was really lonely
and there is uh yeah so where's he from i'll do the accent jeremy was from southwest london
it is an extremely rare sinistral snail so that means that the shell spirals to the left
so he was called jeremy because they named him after jeremy corbyn but it meant his
genitals were on the wrong side so he could only have sex with another snail who also had
genitals on the left side anyway they did a search and they found two potential mates this
is a lovely story you keep saying it's a lovely story a succession of perverts trying to get
weird animals to have sex this isn't a lovely story at all wait i want to see the snails
oh
snail porn come on
takes ages it takes ages anyway this is a nice story because two potential mates were found one
in spain and one in suffolk and they brought the three together oh there is a threesome
no no it's worse darling the ones from spain and suffolk got down to it and jeremy had to watch
was he videoing it this is the key yeah you say he had to watch he could have just gone indoors
yeah now because i love you phil we do actually have some snail porn oh yeah
there's snails engaging in foreplay so what they do is they circle and they touch each
other's tentacles yeah if you look carefully there you can see their penises come out of their
heads that is just a thing it's a snail thing oh baby yeah don't worry about unblocking the sink
come to bed only one final challenge remains for our gallant knights as we trepidate into
the treacherous kingdom of general ignorance fingers on buzzers please which is the closest
planet to earth yes absolutely right it is mercury but it's not how we normally think of it
so the minimum distance between the earth and venus is 24 million miles if you have a look at
this this is how we generally very very near isn't of it yeah well it is in sort of space
terms the minimum distance to mars is 34 million miles and to mercury it's 48 million
miles so you would imagine that it all goes like that and everybody stays in the same
line up however that is not how orbits work so let's have a look at this video which explains
it a little bit more initially it looks as though mercury is the furthest away but the
way the orbits function is that venus often is right the other side of the sun making it
really really far away and there's a guy called oliver hawkins and he wrote some
computer code to try and work this out and he found that the planet that spends most of
the time closer to earth than any other is mercury so it's closest to earth 46 percent of
the time venus was closest 36 percent of the time and mars only 18 i think i did say all of that
yeah venus is an astonishing place because a day on venus is longer than a year it rotates
so slowly that you could stroll across its surface at exactly the same speed as the sun
passes through the sky it means you could watch the sunset forever just by walking but you'd be
eviscerated you would darling it rains sulfuric acid and the atmosphere is 872 degrees fahrenheit
but anything for a sunset am i right anybody have a mnemonic to remember the planets in order
yes it's mercury venus earth mars Jupiter Saturn Uranus Neptune thank you darling that's
perfect um that is the order and gruto doesn't count it's actually a disney character yes
that is the order of the planets and one is often taught it at school so
many volcanoes emit mulberry jam sandwiches under normal pressure
or my very easy method just speeds up naming planets so they were i couldn't get past vagina
though i've got moist vagina expected might just steam up nighty so so weirdly that's
probably the one i'm going to remember anybody else alice you've got one mine's quite depressing
okay mom's vacant expression means jane sulks and less noticed wow you're a jolly girl at school
my favorite is mary's virgin explanation made joseph suspect upstairs neighbor
we're pointing out of course that pluto is no longer regarded now not there
it's now a dwarf but on the subject of earth where would you find the oldest part of it
antique shop alice is sort of heading in the right direction in terms of it being on display
somewhere is it a fossil in a museum is it something like that well it's actually in
shuston oh it's the moon rock moon rock is darling it is absolutely a piece of moon rock
because it was don't blind me with science so we're talking about apollo 14 so 1971 they
brought some bits and pieces back and they haven't really had time to analyze them all
you know how you have stuff in a box you think i must get to it so it's at mass's lunar sample
laboratory facility in houston and in january 2019 they analyzed a piece of this rock
and they realized it came from what's known as the hadian earth so we are talking about the
planet only being about half a billion years old at that point and it was found on the
moon but almost certainly what happened is this particular specimen was blasted off the
earth about four billion years ago when a large asteroid struck so it would have shot
through what would have been much thinner atmosphere and collided with the moon which
at that time was only a third of its current distance as i'm sure you know the moon is
drifting away from the earth annually about 1.6 inches used to be much closer than it is so
so that is an astonishing thing that they found it in the cupboard um it's only tiny
it's a chip just about a couple of centimeters squared everyone's got that draw with you know
yes elastic bands yeah some floppy disks we cleared out our understates cupboard and
we found three fondue sets what is i've never been less surprised by anything
the oldest known piece of earth was found on the moon what is the name of this sword
Excalibur
that's the first one he got Excalibur is the one later yes from the lady of the lake the one he
pulled out the stone is called terry oh yeah you're right the sword the sword and stones
likely called clarent claren claren is a sort of piece he pulled it out of the stone shortly
before buying his first pair of trousers they're quite a fit aren't they that's what
they're all laughing at i did see a boy in the street the other day wearing uh jeggings
a boy it's a mistake isn't it you can see everything because he was sinister
i know a snail like you
with the quest for eternal life so so alan of car your final challenge okay
okay upon the under table lies the chalice of eternal life prithi select the one true
holy grail and bring it to me oh okay good luck this is my hat oh yes of course if i
look like indiana jones i look like a charlie hungerford from berserak
so um you are looking for the holy grail which one are you going to select what's that
indiana jones one where it thinks that jesus's cup will be like the golden one but it's the
modest one isn't it okay so what do you reckon well i think it's the wooden one
here is the thing you should have picked the tray tray is the holy grail a grail was most
likely a serving dish so would you please bring me the tray and none of the cups whatsoever
has it got one of those bean bag padded bottoms i love those if i could have that
please darling the word grail like thank you sweetheart it comes from the latin gradale
grail and it means a deep platter that you would serve food on during medieval banquets
it gradually evolved from sort of middle ages onwards into people thinking it was a larger
vessel with an elaborate cover and then a drinking cup tradition the idea is it gives
immortality to the drinker although the bible gives no special significance to the chance
that jesus uses to consecrate his land why it became very popular in arthurian tales
one of these stories tells of joseph of aramathia bringing it to glastonbury actually
where he got smashed oh well there's a stream that runs red is that right oh by the red bull
stand well the legend has it it's because it's traveled through christ's blood via the holy
ground i think spoil sports scientists will tell you it's the high levels of iron red oxide in
the soil well i'm afraid you picked wrong but you look very fetching in the hat i would love
to see a camp indiana jones make terrible happens because
a grail actually looks like this which means a holy grail looks like this
i'm working my ass off here people which brings us to the scores in first place
with minus one it's phil in second place with minus seven making a fantastic debut it's alan
car this is surprising minus 15 alan plays with minus 18 it's alan farewell to my noble
knights alice alan phil and alan and me till we meet again let us dwell upon this questing
quotation from the late great knight of the realm sir terry pratchett so much universe
and so little time good night