I
Welcome to
Tonight gone a bit random everything has and just when you're least expecting it bibble four of them come along at once, huh?
Yes, so in no particular order all sure carpets. Delisa. Chippanda
Buzzers I have just put my personal playlist on random shuffle. Yeah, the whole show is random. So here goes to Lisa goes
Sally goes I have eclectic taste
It is the very first one in the world where we just asked the audience to stay home
Because we are doing the very first show with a virtual audience. Let's hear it for the people at home
Tell me something that is truly random
Worth it just just for that elections unless you're in Central Africa
I mean, I think you know, it's a pretty general thing. I like to think Africa led the way we led the way we inspired you
If you put your finger in your ear and scratch, yeah, you get the sound from pac-man what?
705 people are doing this
I can hear I can hear it. Yeah, that's have it confirmed by musical maestro. No, it is absolutely not I can confirm that is musically
Something
Question is really about random playlists. So, you know, for example on Spotify, you can have shuffle or random, can't you?
So the thing is that people thought that the random function didn't shuffle the songs
Randomly enough and it turns out the system was entirely random
But we can't process that because our brains look for patterns
And so what happens is if we hear a song three times in a row
Which could happen if the song list was in time random
We feel that some are being played more than others some being ignored some possibly being blacklisted
And so they had to change the algorithm to make it seem more more random than it actually was
I just thought of something that's random and that's birdsong. Is that entirely random? It's stochastic. Okay
We've tried to stamp out on this
Knowledge
Not stochastic no, anyway, um, I forgot what I'm gonna say now. Oh, yeah
Something amazing from stoke stoke. Yes
Is
Presumably darling Williams what number of sounds that they can make
No, the thing is that it's one of the reasons why birdsong is so relaxing because it's slightly random
It's like if we listen to repetitive beats eventually gets on your nerves or a drill or something
It's exactly the same every time but birdsong it varies ever so slightly just slightly enough
So that we love it my favorite birds obviously is the great tit not just for the I mean i'm with you bill not just for the
the reasons
those base reasons
I know the cock. Yes the cock the big
How have we gone down the road of innuendo so soon
So soon in the great all the birds in the world and it's great
Listen
It imitates the alarm calls of other birds, right? It's brilliant
So when it goes to the feeder on you in your garden it goes
And does the alarm call and all the birds go and they all leg it and the great
And just eats all the food
The sound of a dove cooing in your um roof make you go insane. What about crows?
I used to have crows nesting out of the bat five in the morning
Ah
You have a lot more attacks by birds
If a true bird attacks are on the rise, it's because humans presumably are encroaching more and more I would imagine on their territories
I also think there was the whole lockdown thing and nobody went outside for a while. They had the place to themselves. Yes
That's true animals turned up everywhere in the there were sheep walking the streets in wales and did know
They were standing outside the subway waiting for it to open
The national lottery, what do we reckon random or not random gotta be random surely
Yeah, no, it's totally random
So what's the sensible technique if you're going to play the lottery?
Lots of people do buy lots and lots and lots of tickets just buy them all buy them all
No, you need to play the numbers that nobody else does it doesn't mean you're more likely to win
It just means you're less likely to share the prize
So people tend to play numbers with their birthday in so anything over 31 is a very good idea people
Weirdly seven still regarded as a lucky number. So don't play things with seven in don't play last week's numbers
Apparently the germans had the time to do a study and they found 12 000 people who were playing last week's numbers
I mean, I don't like the germans particularly i'm not having a go in any way of the germans sounds like don't get me started
Having this zoom audience feels like there's another studio the show going on that people are laughing. Yeah
Anton decker next door
I like the fact you can hear things through I did a show in the west end once and the theater next to me was
Les Miserables and um during the death scene, I deliberately engineered it so my entire audience sang la bamba
So during this heart-rending death scene you could just
Apparently it was a highlight for the stage management every night
Random playlists are programmed not to be random. So you think they're random how random is that?
But why is young people's music so bloody repetitive?
How young do you mean? Are you talking cardi b or like best of cbbs like oh
You're talking very young people are you talking are you talking the hit parade? Yes the hit parade
The top 10 the most
Repetitive music ever. Mm-hmm is south african music called quaito
Okay, and the whole song has like one lyric like there was one which was just traffic
Corp corp traffic corp corp for the whole song
But you know, it's got lots of instrumentals and the lyrics don't matter but it yeah, wow massively repetitive
Is that seriously why music's getting more repetitive because we're getting
more
african
More rhythmic no, but it is becoming more repetitive
So they did a study in 2012
They studied almost 500 000 songs recorded between 1955 and 2010
And the most recent songs feature less variety and pitch but like the beatles said na na na na for like
10 minutes. Yeah
But also a timbral variety which I don't even know what that is darling the time so like a string sound would be different
Of brass or woodwind that's the camera. Well, apparently it peaked in the 1960s and it's been declining ever since and also modern
Songs have got louder, but there is less variation in volume and sadder and sadder
Part of the problem is it's the same people
Writing songs for different artists. That's right
So in 2012 three of the most commercially successful songs taylor swifts
We are never ever getting back together
Katie perry's part of me and maroon five's payphone were all written by the same
Company a company called paratone which is a swedish music production company and it's also a matter of perception
Apparently people tend to have as they get older to listen to less new music
Yes, so by the time you're about 33 you stop listening to new music altogether
They did a survey a music streaming site called deezer and they found 60 percent of respondents listen to the same songs
Over and over again. Yeah, we crave familiarity. We do and even when it's something new. I think you want it to be
What you're familiar with just different enough to make you think it's something different
But if it was truly original, you'd be upset. That's right
But I also think doesn't every generation bemoan the next generation's music like people who love bethoven would be like
Oh this is shopan. It's noise
Just like your tit song
I think
You're going to bring out my tit song
Fascinating because it's the same but ever so slightly varied. Yes surely young people's music bill
Also endlessly fascinating because of the interruptions that surf is every now and then
Welcome to after dark
Do you know the great tit was used in brooklyn's fourth symphony, did you know that I I imagined that there was a tit in
There somewhere there is was it an actual great tit not he didn't get a tit into the console
right
What was your favorite band when you were a youngster hallow the jam
Oh, but I can't really listen to them now. I quite like new music
and I quite like now you can get a streaming service of your choice and they'll
Show you a whole place. It's so easy to get new stuff when I was at boarding school
We had one we had a gramophone that was given to us by a parent, but we had one single
And it was leaving on a jet plane
There is something called the reminiscence bump
So the idea is that we tend to remember our young adult life rather disproportionately to other years
So very few people remember anything really before they were five years old
And then we experience a bump which is sort of between the ages of 10 and 30
Especially the years in your 20s, which we remember really clearly
And then what happens is we do remember the most recent past but there's a kind of gap
Which fades back down to the reminiscence bump and it may be why we particularly like that music from that time. That's
Really depressing because between 10 and 30 my life was terrible now. It's good. Yeah, and i'm not gonna remember
When is it a good idea to put a round thing in a square hole
Oh
Yes
Uh when you're dating a robot
Yes
Are we talking about the period between being 10 and 30 darling
No is the answer
Okay, here is the thing there is an actual practical application for this trees do better if you plant them in square holes
Now this is a marvelous thing partly because it's obviously easier to dig a square hole is the first thing
So what happens if you plant a tree into a round hole the tree roots
They become used to the sort of recently turned soil that they've been planted in
And when they hit the compacted soil at the edge of the hole, they respond by spiraling
Around the edge and eventually they'll grow into a tight ring and you can actually choke or even kill the plant
If you have a square hole the tree roots are going to do better because they're not good at turning right angles
They just don't like it very clever who discovered that isn't it wonderful
So if you put it in a round hole, it'll grow around like that
But if you put it in a square hole once it gets to the edge
It'll think well
I just need to keep going and it'll push through the soil
And so a square hold tree can much more easily establish itself
I did not did not know this and I I mean I did plant all that many trees if i'm honest with you
No, no, I mean you don't tend to do
No, well, do you know what the guinness world record is for the most trees planted by an individual in 24 hours?
How many do you think in 20? I'm sure it was a
Uh drug dealer marijuana
No actual trees by hand was his back. Yes by hand. Yeah
Five thousand and one fifteen thousand one hundred and seventy red pine seedlings
It's a gentleman called n chaplain
Uh from saskatoon in central canada. This is ken here
And he broke the previous record of twelve thousand three hundred and eighty trees which had been set by his twin brother
Kurt
It's one tree every four and a half seconds
Is it which would you rather be a square peg in a round hole or a round peg in a square hole?
The tree one i'm gonna go i'd like to be round peg in a square hole, please sandy answer two. Yes
You're absolutely right darling. It is the better fit
One of the earliest citations of the phrase comes from this gentleman here
Do you remember when everybody had their portrait done from the side remember there was a thing wasn't there I can do heads
I can do profile. Yeah, I can't do hands. No
Or two eyes you do the suggestion of a wrist. No, I do the sleeve and then it just tapers away
I cannot do hands you'll have to get someone else in to do the hands
They can join on and I do not do hands and I only do profiles
What can you do the hint of a second eye? No, I'm gonna do one eye
From the side I can do the other side of the head on the other side of the canvas
You're hanging in the middle of the room. See one side go around the other side, but no hands one ear
Yeah, just one. All right
Anyway, this is a journalist who went by the mother's name of albany von blanke
Let's just use that for book in restaurant
Of the gilford von bronx
Oh
All facing to the side no problem
We don't have any hands no hands you have to be fed the food manually with someone else straw we put it up your nose
Anyway in 1837 he wrote that sir
Robert peale was a smooth round peg in a sharp cornered square hole and lord linhurst
Who was bill's lord chancellor is a rectangular square cut peg in a smooth round hole and it turns out the reference to peale is
Slightly less insulting a round peg in a square hole is a better fit
So it will fill a maximum of 79 percent
Whereas the square peg can only fill 64 percent of the round hole and sometimes it matters
What is the most famous example of fitting a square peg in a round hole that saved lives as anybody?
I know this apollo 13. It is i've got to put this what's the quote this in that
Yes, what is that?
Is what it was like the worst chat up line ever
Come on
I've got two of those it's from apollo 13
Yeah
The weird thing about the apollo 13 film is that when they had test audiences they complained that the ending wasn't realistic
So what happened was there was an explosion and it forced the crew into the lunar module
It was sort of a kind of lifeboat really
So it was designed for two people for 36 hours and not three astronauts for 96 hours
And carbon dioxide was building up fast and they needed to replace something known as co2 scrubbers
Which is a sort of a piece of equipment which absorbs co2 and they only had square
Scrubbers from the main command module and so they did a sort of bodge
They used two pairs of underpants technically known as liquid cooling garment bags
I know that's what i'm gonna call them now. Yeah, I know exactly
Yes lcg bags
Two socks a bungee cord and a lot of uh duct tape
And it and it got them home in other words a bra bra
Did anyone see those their nasa transcripts of when the poo escaped
I spend a lot of time in deep google
Much more time than I should no, but they release
You know all the transcripts of all the astronauts conversations
And if you search through you can find quite a lot of transcripts of escaped astronaut poo and the chat around
Whose is that?
How would you know if it was yours or not, I mean, oh you would know you would
Well, you just deny it anyway, yeah
Look at that
They use a lot of duct tape does anybody know if it's duck tape or duct
Tape, which is correct. Uh, I would make a bid for duct
As in the word fixing ducts
Fixing ducts with a brand name. No, so it was originally called duct tape. Uh dates
Yeah dates from 1899. It comes from the word doik in dutch, which means canvas
So it was canvas backed tape
So duct tape is the original and it became duct tape when people began to use it more more frequently for ducts
For shutting up ducks. Yeah
Kidnapped
Yeah, keeping people against their will. Yeah
I would have no
What?
I use it for replying to microphone stands. I don't know what you're talking about
Dark fantasies of you got when I was at boarding school
We used to wax our legs with it. No, did you really? Yes. Wow
Wow, we used to have that loo roll. That was like a little paper. We used to write home on that
Dear mum and dad, i'm writing these with my own shit
I'm in zero gravity. This is the worst boarding school i've ever been to
Right here is a watermelon. You should all have water. Oh, it's heavy
Now I want you to demonstrate the best way to test if it is ripe
Well, I know you're um, this is probably going to set your alarms off but
No, that's that's entirely right. It's well actually to slap it really what really? Yeah
So if it is right, it'll have a deep sound to it a bit like somebody knocking on the door or beating a drum
Mark twain said to eat a watermelon was to know what the angels eat
He's never had a crunchy, has he?
In america, there's a weird racial stereotype about black people liking watermelon
Doesn't exist in malawi or kenya or any of the places I was so when I went to north america
And people were implying this is like a racist thing. I was like it's just a watermelon
I didn't understand that people were implying an insult saying oh you want a watermelon?
Yes, I do richard prier said that but when he went to africa and spent time there and he saw
black people doing every job
All the management positions were black people everybody in the hotel whatever role they had was so they completely transformed his
view because he'd grown up in that culture where there were certain associations of black people that just
Didn't exist in africa. It's like being a woman and going to scandinavia, isn't it sandy? Yeah
Let's try avocados people. I love going to scandinavia. There's lots more people look like me there
What beards? Oh that okay. What do you mean? What are you suggesting?
I was going to go for bewildered
It looked like all the nordic mythical creatures rolled into one some composite
Small goat under a bridge and what?
Would you do to find out if an avocado is ripe squeeze it obviously, yes, so 97 percent of people squeeze them in shops
And do you know what it does?
bruises damages
The best way to tell if it's ripe is can you see that there's a little
Uh tiny stem at the top if that comes away easily
And uh, and you can see green underneath. So i'm just going to remove it
Uh, then it is ready if it is dark. This one's ready. Uh, then it means it's not ripe
If it's not ripe, what can you do to hasten its ripeness? It must be an urban legend
They say put it next to a banana. Yes, darling. That's absolutely right. It's like a banana grooming it. I don't know how
No, so what you do is you put it in a paper bag with either an apple or a banana
For two three days at room temperature, so it releases ethylene. It's one of your top plant hormones
I for the very first time
In lockdown, I decided to grow tomatoes from seeds and I had my first tomato this morning off my tomato plants
Which are now taller than me. I mean not that tall but you know
It was delicious. Yes, it was like a completely different experience
It was nothing like a tomato that you buy. No in lockdown. Our road had a sunflower growing competition and um
my
15 year old sprayed all the seeds with links
And what happened is it meant most of them didn't grow and the ones that did grow
Are dwarf
But did not the sunflowers get a lot of girlfriends?
Slapping your melons is a good way to check they're ripe, but it may
Is there a button that we can press for when the innuendo goes off the scale
Uh
Slapping your melons is a good way to check they're ripe, but it may get you kicked out of tesco
Not sure i've been in a test case right um avocados away just not a sentence i've ever thought to say
Worst bombing raid in history avocados. Oh god we put the we where's the bombs? Oh, they're in tescos
Here's a risky question for you sally, okay. Oh, can you explain male idiot theory?
I guess it's the fact that
I always think like one man isn't an idiot
But when we congregate you become idiotic like for example, if you're alone and you go to a curry house
You will order a sensible
Curry, but if you're with your mates you order the hardest one
Yeah, you don't want your teenage boy going in a car with other teenage boys. Exactly
He's much more likely to die if he's got friends in in the car
The phrase male idiot theory was coined by an american cartoonist called john mcpherson
Um, but it sort of made its way into scientific literature
And it's the fact that men are more likely to take risks, especially young men
Uh, in fact the number one killer of young men aged about 15 to 34 is stupidity
Um
They have more emergency department admissions more sporting injuries higher mortality due to accidents
Just much more likely to take senseless risks where the actual payoff is negligible
Even non-existent such as becoming a comedian. Yes, exactly
Do you know about the darwin awards? Yeah, about the deal. Yes. Yes
You know thinning out the gene pool of the most stupid
Yeah, it it honors people who die or become sterile thanks to their own stupidity
Individuals who protect our gene pool by making the ultimate sacrifice of their own lives
My favorite is the terrorist who sent a package containing a bomb by post
And the package was returned for inadequate postage and he opened it
That was wonderful
But the idea is that is that men are inherently more risk-taking. I mean, it's a slightly controversial idea
It's also to do with conditioning that young boys are sort of brought up to yes
Test themselves you're reinforced if you take a risk, it's like it's awfully the clothing for kids
The young boys all the t-shirts were rascal terror
Brave and girls are cutesy princess princess
A friend of mine noticed the other day that photographic adverts for a particular sporting brand
All the boys and men were actually engaging in the sport
Whereas all the girls and women were simply stretching or posing with a ball
I'm fine with that
Yeah
Yeah, see I think it's women tend to tend to be a bit more organized and empathetic and I've got to say I trust women
More when it comes to say something like a global pandemic, you know
I think all the countries that are run by women have done much better than the ones
Well, there's an interesting theory about that
To be honest people argue it on both sides
But you're absolutely right that you know, for example, new zealand did extremely well during the pandemic. Yes angela
It actually angers me to watch how sensible she is
Oh really?
It's like going over to see someone who's got a better marriage than yours
Every time he's actually making so much sense
So the real problem is that risk is quite difficult to quantify and one of the ways in which you do it is
With balloons. So there's a thing called a balloon analog risk task or bart
And so what happens is you're given a balloon
These are actually done on a computer screen and as you inflate the balloon your reward
Grows, but if the balloon pops then all points are lost and it's working out how big to inflate your balloon
The bigger the balloon gets the more risk-taking you are. So I thought this is marvelous
Let's have some balloons and we'll see who is the biggest risk-taker and it turns out. It's too big a risk
Uh
You blow into it and then share it with the world
So we can't take the risk
Of seeing what risk you would take
I know
We're trapped in an existential bind. I know
Right, what happens if you put 10 attractive people on a raft in the atlantic channel five series, yes exactly
Immediately
There was a mexican anthropologist called santiago genovese
And he was very intrigued by the idea that most conflicts between monkeys is about access to ovulating female monkeys
He wanted to find out if it applied to humans
So in 1973 he put this raft together and he filled it with 10 attractive people
And then he wanted to sail them from the canary islands to mexico. They'd all die of thirst wouldn't they? Well
It was a 12 meter by 7 meter raft. He advertised internationally lots of people wanted to go
The final lineup included an alaskan waitress a french scuba diver an israeli doctor and a japanese photographer
He called the experiment the peace project, but the press called it the sex raft
It didn't go well
Did someone die?
No, but they didn't get on you tried to get them to have sex
You know by by saying you two together and nobody liked that on a raft. That's a very yeah wobbly orgy. Yeah
Yeah
There were hurricanes approaching and he insisted that they carry on
He thought the danger would make people act on their instincts and so on and eventually the raft mate staged a mutiny
And threw him out of the group. So it didn't work at all. Um, does anybody know what this picture is that you used to illustrate it?
Oh, I hope it doesn't look very cheery. No, it's called the raft of the medusa
So there was a french frigate called the medusa it set sail to senegal in
1816 and the captain hit a sand bank and there weren't enough lifeboats
So they built a raft, but only 15 people survived
Uh, this is a famous painting of it a 19th century painting by theodore gerico
It didn't help. I think that they took casks of wine with them instead of water
Well initially it would have been all right
But you know how you get a bit peckish so they turned to cannibalism. Yeah. Yeah, none of it's
Yeah
Starts off fine bit of wine and then it all gets out of hand
It is an extraordinary painting and what are they reaching for like?
They can see a boat in the distance a deliveroo boat. Yeah
This is the moment when they just before they were rescued
But the painter he was so determined to get it right that he spent
Weeks and weeks going to morgues and and he kept the severed head in his studio for about two weeks
Um, how long do you think somebody could survive out at sea if you were in a boat by yourself a week
You reckon a week a week
So there's a gentleman called jose salvador alvarenga. He holds the record for the longest time lost at sea
He went fishing one day the man he did not know at all called ezekiel cordova
And they got blown off course. They were a little sort of 22 foot skiff. It just had no top on it at all
Cordova lost hope he refused to eat and then he died this gentleman here alvarenga. He floated for
438 days what I know he managed to catch fish. He drank turtle blood
He managed to catch some birds bits of food on floating pieces of plastic. He drank rainwater
He drank his own urine and eventually ended up naked on a beach in the marshall islands
Which is he'd probably traveled five and a half thousand miles from mexico today
Apparently, he's got a phobia of water anybody surprised
It seems a bit harsher than they're chucking him off this boat. Yeah
It looks like he's been thrown out of a nightclub, didn't they
He got sued actually by cordova's family. Uh, they sued him and said accused him of cannibalism
But he passed a polygraph test and said he didn't do it
So that was the end of that but 438 days. That's amazing
Amazing, I mean he says he says that I mean he probably a couple of weeks
It looks like he's been
On the island for a year. He'd been on the island. Yeah, yeah married that woman married some local
How long have you been here? Oh, I just landed. I was at sea for a year. No, you haven't been running a bowling alley in tahiti
Now let's spend some time with my favorite army official
General ignorance, yes
There thank you fingers on buzzers, please apart from humans. What's the world's deadliest mammal?
Hippos hippos are unbelievable. Yes
Certainly if you are traveling in africa the hippo is more dangerous almost than any other the guides at lake malawi
Yeah, that put the fear of god in you
But then again like when I was in rwanda they're oh it's the gorillas the gorilla I guess whatever guy you are
The hippos are unbelievably dangerous and what's annoying is they'll take pink milk. Did you know that? Yeah, they like charlie and lola
Like charlie and lola, there's a big problem in columbia with hippos pablo escobar's hippos
You know the renowned cocaine dealer he bought a load of hippos in the 80s
And then then it all went wrong for him obviously and um, but the hippos have survived and mated and procreated
There's now about 80 of uh of the so-called cocaine hippos. Are they doing their own drug deals on the side?
It's not a him in the world's deadliest mammal it's dogs has this been tested if we put a hippo versus a dog
I'm betting on the hippo. Well, it's it's about how many uh deaths it causes
It's the spread of rabies. It kills 25 000 people every year
So they are responsible the dogs for 99 percent of infections
Particularly in countries where there's a large number of stray dogs
So places like india and so on are particularly at risk
Does anybody know how to calculate the age of a dog in human years?
I've heard people talk about this but time is not subjective. No, right
I can't be like it can't be like how old are you i'm i'm i'm 40 but i'm 20 deliso years
Like time is time
Well, it isn't because how long does a dog live? Well 15 if you
So 20 if you're lucky lives about 15 years and a human being maybe sort of 80 years
So what was the used to be the calculations seven seven? Yeah
A human year was seven dog years and um, it's it's bunk apparently
They've done a new study of labradors and what you have to do is multiply the natural logarithm of a dog's age by 16
And then you add 31
So I did this for my dog who is four and a quarter years old and it made her 54
So you would think in the old in old money that she was you know
Coming up to 30, but in fact, she's much older than you thought. So my age is 16 times the dog's age
Minus 31 to say I feel you've not entirely
The thing the dog does first thing in the morning, oh that yes
log off
So so get it in a bag
So logarithmic growth has the effect that the rate of growth diminishes over time
So it's the opposite of exponential a logarithm. So something grows exponentially bigger
Then the increase gets more and more as time goes on. So for example, an infectious disease is exponential
Uh, so it starts with a few people and then as time go by it infects more and more people something which grows
Logarithmically gets large very quickly, but the increase quickly flattens out
So so for example losing weight losing weights, you probably lose a lot the first month as time goes by you lose
Only a little bit and it's doesn't mean dogs age more slowly
So what happens is they age very quickly to start with and then it levels off
So we have a look at a list we've got so for example, a three month old dog
Is the same as a nine-year-old human? Can you see how it changes six months is 19 a year 31?
It just takes one year to reach that age. So by the time it gets to where my dog is four years old 53
Yes, so really interesting this formula I have to say is specific to labrador's and it does vary
Um, why should you put lots of plants in your flat?
Because of the um lovely, um way that uh, they uh produce
So what you're saying better air quality better air quality
Better air quality
So they look really nice in houses
but they've done a study at Drexel university in philadelphia and they found if you wanted to purify the air in your
Home, you would need between a hundred and a thousand plants per square meter
Icing open the window. That's what i'm gonna go with a bit of febreeze. Yeah
Yeah, I mean they're good
They have a positive benefit plants if you spend time around them because it makes you feel better
It's good for depression. Uh, in fact, the japanese have a thing called forest bathing
And it's just about going outdoors listening to the sounds
Tasting the air they talk about yes
I suppose especially important in japan because about 80 percent of people live in cities in japan
Now each of you has a coconut. Oh, this is wonderful. I want you to give it a shake
What liquid are you listening for?
Coconut milk, is it right?
No, no
There is no milk in a coconut isn't the water from a coconut called coconut milk
No, so coconuts have coconut water in them, but coconut milk is made from pulped coconut flesh
Do you know it's illegal
To send coconuts to fiji
by mail
How deep is the googling
What
Because I wanted to send a coconut to fiji why no, but but why would you even want to I was on task master
It was like get get the coconut as far away as possible, right?
So I thought i'll post it to fiji. Yes, it turned out it's banned. That's all I want to do now
After this airs, there's probably going to be a big problem
There's going to be a lot of returned coconuts
The postage would be quite expensive
Yeah, well, could you not just put a stamp on it?
So you want to conceal it you want to convince them it's not a coconut, but that's exactly what they think you would do
Just they would go like surely wouldn't have just put a label on the outside of the coconut
No, no only a man would do that only an idiot
Put it in a square box. Yeah, there you go
Right coconuts away, thank you
Uh now to return to the random theme of today's show, uh, you've got weapons under your desk
Uh, please put your masks on
Uh, because I don't want anybody to get hurt and I want you to demonstrate
Firing at random and I hope none of you is an american policeman
At random, yep, which way did you fire it darling I fired at sally
Okay fire at random now i'm gonna fire it delete well sally actually
Hold on what have you not pulled the thing down then right. Oh
That was the loudest noise i've ever heard my entire life
Have you fired one yet? No, I haven't. Oh, sorry
Wow, they're quite strong. It went off in my hand governor. Oh
Are they quite can you hit my greatest?
Okay
Okay, that's it no more firing
Okay
So the word random originally it was about something happening at great speed
But when you were told to fire at random if you were a soldier
It had a really specific meaning and the idea was that you wanted to fire the maximum possible range
And the way to do that is to fire at exactly 45 degrees upwards
The very first thing you did sadly was that you fired at this angle
It's sort of intuitive that used to be known as firing at random my favorite fact about bullets
Wow, which I think I learned here
Yeah, because if you fire a bullet from a gun and at the same moment you drop a bullet
The two bullets will hit the ground at the same time
No, yeah, isn't that amazing? Wow, it's really isn't that doesn't that depend on the gun?
This is very boring, but I think it's it's because there's force
Coming that way and force coming that way. Yeah, so you change this force
It's going to still interact with the gravity. I I don't know what that's probably that's sounding good
I would go with that
I should have just said it more confidently. Yes, I should have thrown in logarithms in it. Yes. Yes
Look we could try that with a nerf bullet
Okay, okay
Right and then drop it at the same time. Okay. Okay. Here we go. Okay. Do you want to count me down?
What do I gotta do here? I'm gonna yell when I see the bullet. Okay
Here we go three two one
One
Boom. Oh, yeah
You can hear the noises, yeah, it's not weird
Well, that's the finest experiment I wasn't expecting
So to fire at random used to be just to fire up in the air the the furthest you could
The idea of something being random the way we use it today is a much more modern
Usage and the thing of it meaning something weird and unexpected
Which is also a modern use is that comes in about the 1980s
American college students use it to you know
Somebody who doesn't belong on our dormitory floor or something was a bit random
But they use that term random wrong like, you know a random showed up at the party
Oh, yeah, it's just a human that's not random if it was a llama apparently and random ruined
Yes, the one I can't stand is it was like cold and I was like tired and oh
So I was like literally dead. Yeah
Yes
It's time for the scores which i'm going to assign randomly in fourth place with minus a million. It's bill
I've never had a million
In third place with 33, it's sally second with 68. It's deliso
And first with a record 150 000, that's the weight of a blue whale in kilograms
What are the odds it's alan davis
Thank you to thank deliso and sally and bill and alan that's all from qi this time
And I leave you with this radical random number remark from astronomer arthur eddington
We used to think that if we knew one we knew two because one and one are two
But we are finding that we must learn a great deal more about and thank you and good night