1 00:00:09,680 --> 00:00:12,400 - We've been here anyway. - Yeah. 2 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:14,096 - Hello. - There they are, hello. 3 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:15,120 Hello. 4 00:00:15,200 --> 00:00:16,600 - Hey, how are you? - All right. 5 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:18,800 Nice to see you again. Nice to see you again. 6 00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:20,176 - Do we do both, hiya. - Nice to see you, too. 7 00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:21,416 - Hello. - You all right? Nice to see you. 8 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:22,496 - Yeah, good, how are you? - Very good. 9 00:00:22,520 --> 00:00:23,750 - Good. - Nice to see you. 10 00:00:23,880 --> 00:00:25,600 - You look fantastic. - Thank you. 11 00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:26,790 Right. Photograph. 12 00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:29,800 Yes, at the Epidaurus, the theatre. 13 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:32,360 Since Greece is the birthplace of drama. 14 00:00:32,440 --> 00:00:34,110 - Good. - A bit on the nose. 15 00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:35,520 Steve, it was your idea. 16 00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:37,270 - Was it? - Yeah. 17 00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:40,120 - Uh, great. Let's do it. - Okay. 18 00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:41,200 Okay. Give me a hand. 19 00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:42,696 Do you want a hand? Do you want Steve to help? 20 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:44,016 No, I'm all right, actually, thank you. 21 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:45,840 Sure, well, you know, I don't wanna, you know, 22 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:47,750 tread on your newly empowered toes. 23 00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:49,600 Of course, well, after you then, sir. 24 00:01:01,440 --> 00:01:04,720 It's hot, if I was looking for one word… 25 00:01:04,800 --> 00:01:06,376 - It's hot. - … to describe this weather, 26 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,536 you'd be hard pushed to find a better word than hot, wouldn't you? 27 00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:10,520 Mad dogs, English men, and… 28 00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:11,920 Welshmen. 29 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:14,310 Ohh, it's very hot. 30 00:01:14,440 --> 00:01:15,510 I know it's hot. 31 00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:18,110 - Masks. - Comedy. Tragedy. 32 00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:20,200 This is… They look like BAFTAs, is that the idea? 33 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:21,456 Yeah, it does look like a BAFTA. 34 00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:22,696 Here we are, you're on familiar ground. 35 00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:24,336 I've got tragedy, are you happy with that? 36 00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:26,320 - Comedy? - Um, I don't know. What do you reckon? 37 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:28,080 - I'd go with that. - Comedy. You're known… 38 00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:29,160 You're a titan of comedy. 39 00:01:29,240 --> 00:01:32,070 I should have the smile because of the number of BAFTAs I've won. 40 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:34,496 And I should have the frown 'cause I've spent a week with you. 41 00:01:34,520 --> 00:01:37,590 - Come on, let's do it. - On the other hand, Rob is known 42 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:40,840 for accessible light entertainment. Smiley face. 43 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:41,920 Yeah. 44 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:46,230 And I'm now known for dramatic roles 45 00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:48,960 because I got a BAFTA nomination… 46 00:01:49,040 --> 00:01:51,240 … for playing Stan Laurel. 47 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:53,400 For impersonating a comedian. 48 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:54,670 So we give it back to you. 49 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:56,256 I wasn't really impersonating a comedian, though, 50 00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:58,950 because BAFTA, the nomination was for best acting… 51 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:00,600 - It certainly was. Mmm. - … in a drama. 52 00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:02,390 Guys, can you take off your hats. 53 00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:03,520 - What? - Hats. 54 00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:04,656 - Take off your hats. - Okay. 55 00:02:04,680 --> 00:02:05,816 Right, I'm gonna burn without a hat. 56 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:07,320 Okay, well, we'll do it quickly. 57 00:02:07,440 --> 00:02:08,856 - I'm not sure… - Why is he on a higher level? 58 00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:11,030 This is just exacerbating the height thing. 59 00:02:11,160 --> 00:02:12,560 You can go on the same level. 60 00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:14,430 I don't think Rob can be on the same level. 61 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:16,040 Oh, you're talking physically, I see. 62 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:17,936 - I've got it, Okay, yep, yep, yep. - Oh, yes, yeah. 63 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:19,240 What about these tourists? 64 00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:20,990 They won't appear in the photo. 65 00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:22,456 - What? - I'll paint them out of the photo. 66 00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:23,536 - You'll paint them out? - Yeah, yeah. 67 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:24,600 Can you paint Rob out? 68 00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:25,936 - It's hot. It's hot. - No, I can't. 69 00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:26,960 Okay. 70 00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:28,376 Try and do like the proper Greek actors, 71 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:29,910 - like a proper drama. - Oh, yeah. 72 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:32,616 As if we're all Greek actors. Right, I'll stab you. That will come easy. 73 00:02:32,640 --> 00:02:34,560 - Ready? Go on. - Yeah, some kind of drama there. 74 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:37,390 - Yeah. - Sing Goddess Achilles 75 00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:41,360 rage black and murderous that cost the Greeks incalculable pain. 76 00:02:41,480 --> 00:02:44,200 And cast countless souls of heroes into Hades' 77 00:02:44,320 --> 00:02:46,790 black, dark, pit. 78 00:02:46,920 --> 00:02:48,910 I am from BAFTA. 79 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:53,190 And I'm afraid, your performance, whilst impressive, 80 00:02:53,320 --> 00:02:55,200 didn't quite meet the criteria. 81 00:02:56,720 --> 00:02:57,870 ♪ It's a tragedy 82 00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:00,600 ♪ When a feeling's gone and you can't go on 83 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,150 ♪ It's a tragedy 84 00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:04,560 ♪ When the morning cries and you don't know why 85 00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:05,880 ♪ It's hard to bear 86 00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:09,840 ♪ With no one beside you You're goin' nowhere ♪ 87 00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:10,960 Can you sort of… 88 00:03:11,080 --> 00:03:12,520 Yeah, but it's not a tragedy, is it? 89 00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:13,920 That's just depression. 90 00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:15,136 Well, that's what a doctor would say. 91 00:03:15,160 --> 00:03:17,830 But Barry's not a doctor, Barry's a wordsmith, 92 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:20,080 so he's employing his poetic licence. 93 00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:22,280 ♪ Tragedy ♪ 94 00:03:22,360 --> 00:03:23,776 Look at this rubbish here, look at that. 95 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:25,456 ♪ When a feeling's gone and you can't go on ♪ 96 00:03:25,480 --> 00:03:27,056 - Come on, come on, Greece. - The bloody Greeks. 97 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:29,600 Come on, Greece, 2,500 years. 98 00:03:30,920 --> 00:03:32,430 Hi, it's Emma. 99 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:34,150 Hello, hi, yeah. 100 00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:36,600 I'm just checking that you're there, we're about to pull in. 101 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:39,360 Great, brilliant, all right then. Fab. 102 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:53,320 Hi, Yugov. 103 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,416 - Hi, Emma, welcome. - Nice to meet you, how you doing? 104 00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:57,830 So you're gonna meet them tomorrow with the car. 105 00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:00,040 - Yes, yes. - Yeah, Okay, brilliant. Thank you. 106 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:02,080 Where does the ferry go from? 107 00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:03,896 - The ferry's down there on the right. - Okay, brilliant. 108 00:04:03,920 --> 00:04:06,200 - Have a good time. - Bye, Yugov. Thank you so much. 109 00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:10,310 There's no cars allowed on Hydra. 110 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:11,456 - Really? - Gotta get the ferry. 111 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:12,800 - That's good. - Yeah, it is good. 112 00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:51,640 - Hi. - Hi. 113 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:53,040 I can take your bags? 114 00:04:53,120 --> 00:04:55,560 Amazing. We're gonna stay at the Hydrea. 115 00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:56,736 - Yes. - Where is the Hydrea? 116 00:04:56,760 --> 00:04:58,136 - It's over there, very near. - Okay, great. 117 00:04:58,160 --> 00:04:59,896 And you'll take it to reception? All the bags? 118 00:04:59,920 --> 00:05:01,376 Okay, brilliant, so everyone just leave their bags. 119 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:02,456 - Okay. Leave the bags. - Okay. 120 00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:03,630 Thank you. Cheers, thanks. 121 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,310 You've got a trolley. 122 00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:09,430 I'm not sure about donkeys. 123 00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:13,120 A bit Shirley Valentine. 124 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,990 Tom Conti will turn up in a minute, pretending to be Greek. 125 00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:20,680 Hello, everybody, hey, welcome the island. Innit. 126 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,416 - He got an Oscar nomination for that. - Did he? 127 00:05:22,440 --> 00:05:24,750 - Yeah. - I was doing Harry Enfield, Stavros. 128 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,550 This is very me. 129 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:28,990 Hello, hi. 130 00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:30,856 - Hey, hello, welcome. - We're here to check in. Hi. 131 00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:33,110 How are you? I'm Thanos, welcome to the island. 132 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:34,256 - Hi. Thank you. - Welcome to our hotel. 133 00:05:34,280 --> 00:05:35,600 How are you? Welcome. 134 00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:36,736 Can I get everyone's passports? 135 00:05:36,760 --> 00:05:37,760 Thank you very much. 136 00:05:37,840 --> 00:05:39,736 We're going to Omilos restaurant, do you know where it is? 137 00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:40,760 Yeah, it's very close. 138 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:42,040 Just around the corner. 139 00:05:42,120 --> 00:05:43,856 Brilliant, Okay, I'm starving, shall we go there now? 140 00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:45,400 - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, absolutely. 141 00:05:51,760 --> 00:05:53,880 Ugh. Rather hot. 142 00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:56,520 It's hot enough to boil a monkey's bum. 143 00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:58,680 Very hot. A lot of heat. 144 00:05:58,760 --> 00:05:59,760 Yeah. 145 00:05:59,840 --> 00:06:04,310 Everywhere. Heat. Look how hot it is. 146 00:06:04,840 --> 00:06:07,360 Can you do his young voice, like when he was in… 147 00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:09,160 - This is really nice quality wine. - Yeah? 148 00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:10,440 Nice bottle of wine. 149 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:13,560 Seventy percent sauvignon blanc and thirty percent… 150 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:14,760 Sauvignon blanc. 151 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,590 You disrespect the family. 152 00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:19,030 You disrespect the family, Rob. 153 00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:21,270 Is there anyone that would like to try it? 154 00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:23,920 Let the lady try, let the lady try it, Rob. 155 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:25,000 There we go. 156 00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:28,720 Yes, lovely, thanks. 157 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:37,000 I'm in the dark here, Charlie. 158 00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:38,990 Scent Of A Woman. I'm in the dark. 159 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:40,230 Where am I? 160 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:41,720 I'm putting my gun together. 161 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:44,240 - You look like you're… - I look like I'm signing to someone. 162 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:46,256 Why do you do the licky tongue thing? He doesn't do that. 163 00:06:46,280 --> 00:06:47,280 You're like a lizard. 164 00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:49,350 You gotta watch The Devil's Advocate, 165 00:06:49,440 --> 00:06:51,510 the last scene, oh… 166 00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:52,656 That's where I get it from. 167 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:54,416 - He doesn't do it like that. - It doesn't resonate, the licking. 168 00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:55,976 There's no… He doesn't do… People don't go, 169 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,176 "Oh, yeah, cause Al Pacino was always sticking his tongue out and looking…" 170 00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,640 - No one's… No one… - Such heat. Ohh. 171 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:01,720 Very deep. 172 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,296 Can't do him when he was younger, you can't do Al Pacino in The Godfather, 173 00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:05,360 you disrespect the family. 174 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:06,976 That's not him in The Godfather, my friend. 175 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,296 - You disrespect the family. - That's Joe Pesci. 176 00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:10,256 - No, Joe Pesci is, you disrespect… - You think that's funny? 177 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:11,656 You actually think I'm a clown? You laugh at me? 178 00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:13,056 What, I make you laugh? I make you laugh. 179 00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:14,640 I make you laugh? I amuse you? 180 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:15,720 I amuse you? 181 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:16,800 - Amuse? - Amuse? 182 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:19,630 - I amuse you? - I shot a moose. In upstate New York. 183 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:20,720 Oh, God, you're doing it. 184 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:22,840 - The young Al Pacino… - But you don't do it, yeah… 185 00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:23,920 Yeah. 186 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:26,016 You were just doing like this. He's not like that. He's like… 187 00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:27,736 - He's got, you know, it's a… - My first wife said… 188 00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:29,400 Sex without love is an empty experience. 189 00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:32,760 But as empty experiences go, it's one of the best. 190 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:37,200 The young Al Pacino had a much softer voice, he talked like this. 191 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:40,840 In Dog Day Afternoon, very soft, like that, very sing-song. 192 00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:42,670 Yeah, but you got the pronunciation wrong. 193 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:44,720 - He said dawg day afternoon. - Dog day afternoon. 194 00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:46,576 - Dawg, you say dawg. - Go listen my friend, go listen to it. 195 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,536 - He said dawg. It's not… - Bobby got under the table, watch the… 196 00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:50,056 He goes round with his gun, "What's this, a squirrel? 197 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:51,376 "We got a squirrel. Get out of here." 198 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:53,630 One of the bank employees is hiding under the table. 199 00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:56,550 - Yeah. - He says… He's nervous, Al is nervous. 200 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:59,040 "What is this, a squirrel? Get out of here, get out of here." 201 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:02,480 I will never challenge his Neil Kinnock. 202 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:05,160 I will never dream of it. But the young Pacino, 203 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:07,200 and the old Pacino, I think we're neck and neck. 204 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:08,280 Uh… 205 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:09,360 With the old one. 206 00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:12,520 And I'm ahead with the young. He does a better De Niro. 207 00:08:12,600 --> 00:08:14,296 And that's how the world should be, shouldn't it? 208 00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:15,376 It is how it works, isn't it? 209 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:17,136 - That's how the world should be. - Some people are good at it. 210 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:18,160 I, uh… 211 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:22,880 So, right here we go, the seabass carpaccio. 212 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:24,880 Here you are. 213 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,000 Oh. 214 00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:28,240 - Wow, amazing. - Wow, it looks amazing. 215 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:33,720 - Delicious, thank you. - Thank you very much. 216 00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:35,120 Jackson Pollock. 217 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:36,200 - Seriously. - Yeah. 218 00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:37,856 - It's Okay, I don't think… - Do you think he made it? 219 00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:39,416 Like was he was over it in the kitchen doing that? 220 00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:41,320 Well, maybe Pollock had a few carpaccios, 221 00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,216 - and that was what inspired him. - Just a little more. There we go. 222 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:45,800 So, it's, sort of, the lemon kind of, cooks it, doesn't it? 223 00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:47,080 It's really lemony. 224 00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:50,710 - That is delicious. And it's also… - Oh, my God. So good. 225 00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:52,550 … kind of what you want in this heat, yeah? 226 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:53,920 Hmm. Totally. 227 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:56,520 It's what you want in the heat. 228 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:04,160 - How are your kids, Rob? - Good, thank you. 229 00:09:04,240 --> 00:09:05,240 Good. 230 00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:07,880 Um, Chloe is ten, Charlie is four. 231 00:09:07,960 --> 00:09:09,920 - Wow. - They're a handful. 232 00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:12,560 - Well… - How's yours? 233 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:14,200 - Very well, thanks, she's four. - Yeah? 234 00:09:14,280 --> 00:09:16,670 Would you have another one, do you think, at your age now? 235 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:20,280 I just think at a certain age it's probably not fair on the kids, is it? 236 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:21,360 - You know. - No. 237 00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:22,656 Keep you young, though, look at Jagger. 238 00:09:22,680 --> 00:09:24,656 Have you seen that clip of him after he had his operation? 239 00:09:24,680 --> 00:09:26,416 I've seen that where he's dancing in front of a mirror. 240 00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:27,896 Where he's dancing, yeah. It's amazing. 241 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:29,216 How long was it after his operation? 242 00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:30,496 I don't know, not long, here, look. 243 00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:31,576 - Pretty soon after. - Really? 244 00:09:31,600 --> 00:09:33,136 - It's incredible. - Let me have a look. 245 00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:34,990 But he has many young children, right? 246 00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:36,430 So he needs to keep fit. 247 00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:37,856 So pretty soon he'll be the only man in Britain 248 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:39,840 with an earlier bed time than his child. 249 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,960 - Don't wanna go to bed. - Or in nappies. 250 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:45,296 I wanna stay up, watch The One Show. 251 00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:47,070 He can share their nappies. 252 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:49,280 Hang on, he's found it, I hope he has, 253 00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:50,936 either that or he's having some sort of a fit. 254 00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:52,790 I've… I knocked the screen off. 255 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:55,950 Whoops, don't worry. It's impressive though, right? 256 00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:58,080 - It's very impressive. - He's got a three-year-old. 257 00:09:58,200 --> 00:09:59,320 - He's obviously a… - Yeah. 258 00:09:59,920 --> 00:10:01,240 Imagine him in the hospital. 259 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:04,720 Can I just say, this ward is like really noisy 260 00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:06,950 and come on, keep it down. 261 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,110 What time is visiting hours? 262 00:10:09,240 --> 00:10:11,016 When's the magazines coming around? I've finished this one. 263 00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:13,430 Here, see the bloke in the next bed? 264 00:10:13,520 --> 00:10:16,190 He's done nothing but complain since he got here. 265 00:10:16,320 --> 00:10:21,080 The nurses are, they're like, angels, the nurses in here… 266 00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:23,910 And he does nothing but complain. I'm like, bloody hell, mate. 267 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:27,470 You know, you should be grateful you're alive, you know what I mean. 268 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:28,560 And him over there. 269 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:33,320 He has no visitors, really sad. No one comes to see him. 270 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:36,200 You all right? Hello! Yeah. 271 00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:37,870 You doing all right? Yeah. 272 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:41,710 Do you think he was on the ward at Papworth? Doubt it somehow. 273 00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:43,336 Yeah no, he probably had a private room, didn't he? 274 00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:44,416 - Yeah. - Yeah, most likely. 275 00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:48,120 Never mind I can't get no satisfaction, I can't get no sleep. The bloody noise. 276 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:51,750 That one over there is moaning and groaning all night. You know… 277 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:53,880 He's talking to himself. 278 00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:57,510 No wonder he don't get any visitors, I mean, he's a nightmare. Yeah. 279 00:10:57,760 --> 00:11:00,830 But, you know, Keith's come to visit and Ronny's come to visit, 280 00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:02,376 - Would Keith go visit? - And Charlie's come to visit. 281 00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:03,696 - They've fallen out, haven't they? - What? 282 00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:05,176 Didn't him and Keith have a falling out? 283 00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:06,200 No, no. 284 00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:08,320 It's like me and him, we get on, we love each other. 285 00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:11,176 Yeah, we have a little… Me and Keith we sometimes have a bit of a, you know. 286 00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:12,456 He said he had a tiny todger, though. 287 00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:13,816 Isn't that sort of hard to come back from? 288 00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:15,510 No, no, he's absolutely fine. 289 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:16,936 Would you forgive Rob if he said that? 290 00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:17,960 Sometimes… 291 00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:19,760 Well, people would know it wasn't true. 292 00:11:19,840 --> 00:11:22,510 This cat's got the biggest todger. 293 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:25,640 When he goes swimming, right, like when he's facing down… 294 00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:27,790 It's like, he's dredging, you know, it's like he's… 295 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:29,160 Oh God. 296 00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:32,160 That's what Keith Richards… when he laughs… 297 00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:36,920 It's like the last death throes of Muttley. Yeah… 298 00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:46,960 I mean, you… Ohh… 299 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,400 - So, right here we have… - Saved by the squid. 300 00:11:49,520 --> 00:11:52,120 The grilled octopus with fava puree. 301 00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:53,200 Amazing. 302 00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:57,320 And Valeriana leaves. And here we have grilled squid with chorizo 303 00:11:57,440 --> 00:11:59,110 - and cauliflower gravy, please. - Wow. 304 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,320 - Wow. - Thank you very much. 305 00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:04,160 - How's your odyssey going? - It's good. It's good. 306 00:12:04,240 --> 00:12:06,760 We've been talking a lot about Aristotle 307 00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:08,070 and his theory of poetics. 308 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,270 Oh, yeah, all the Stotles, Ari, Barry, Gary… 309 00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:12,720 Yeah. You have the book. 310 00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:15,040 - Are you familiar with this? - No, I'm not, actually. 311 00:12:15,160 --> 00:12:17,630 Rob wasn't till about a week ago, but carry on. 312 00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:23,200 He says, "Imitation comes…" Anthony Hopkins. "Imitation comes naturally 313 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:25,296 - "to human beings from childhood." - He always has to say… 314 00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:26,990 Yeah. I wouldn't have got it though. 315 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:31,150 So does the universal pleasure in imitations. 316 00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:35,750 He sees imitation as something to enjoy. 317 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:36,840 Yeah, quite right. 318 00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:39,200 This journey of life is all too brief, Emma. 319 00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:42,430 - It really is. It is, Rob. - Why not enjoy it? 320 00:12:47,320 --> 00:12:49,160 Look at all the BAFTAs and the Oscars recently. 321 00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:52,030 There's a massive amount of that is imitation, 322 00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:54,350 whether it's Christian Bale as Dick Cheney… 323 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,510 - Yeah. - Steve Carell as Donald Rumsfeld. 324 00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,510 - Yeah. - Frank Langella, Frost/Nixon. 325 00:12:58,600 --> 00:12:59,600 Do you know what? Yeah. 326 00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:03,560 Although I think Michael Sheen was a better one as Frost. 327 00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:04,840 - Hi. - Yeah. 328 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:07,040 - Good evening. - That's not a good David Frost. 329 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,630 I'm from Port Talbot. 330 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:12,880 Hello, good… Hello, good evening and welcome. 331 00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:15,790 - A younger version. - There is, even in his old age, 332 00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:18,576 - there was a crispness to the voice. - That's Mick Jagger you're doing. 333 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,336 - He's doing Mick Jagger. - Good evening and welcome. 334 00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:22,896 Yeah, hello, good evening, we're gonna start with Honky Tonk Women. 335 00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:26,760 You can't… Is that… You can't do David Frost and you can't accept that. 336 00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:28,616 - Let's spend the night together. - Let's spend… 337 00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:31,240 Yeah, let's do the monster mash, that's what you're sounding like. 338 00:13:31,480 --> 00:13:33,710 Hello, good evening, and welcome. 339 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:34,920 That's not what I'm doing. 340 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,310 You can't do the crispness, it's just beyond you, 341 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:41,550 so you have to do something different as a caricature to make up for what… 342 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:42,976 Your impressions are never accurate, 343 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,736 they're always just sort of slightly out of character… 344 00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:45,990 - God, that's harsh. - They're… 345 00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:48,296 I think you've got to start experimenting with his dosage again 346 00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:51,840 because there was a period, wasn't there, well, when he was good. 347 00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:52,976 - That's harsh. - It's true. 348 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,216 But you do have to say the name frequently 349 00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:55,376 when you do the impersonation. 350 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,696 Would you like me to ask the waiter for some crayons and some paper? 351 00:13:57,720 --> 00:14:00,080 So you can do some colouring while we talk? 352 00:14:00,160 --> 00:14:02,230 What about Rami Malek as Freddie Mercury? 353 00:14:02,320 --> 00:14:03,560 - He was very good. - Very good. 354 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:05,256 - Extraordinary. - Have either of you got a Mercury 355 00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:06,280 up your sleeves? 356 00:14:06,360 --> 00:14:07,736 - Let me tell you now… - Oh, here we go. 357 00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:08,760 - No, I haven't. - No? 358 00:14:08,840 --> 00:14:10,400 I… No, I don't know. What's his voice? 359 00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:12,630 ♪ Anybody 360 00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:18,080 ♪ Find me somebody to love ♪ 361 00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:20,440 - It's not bad. - Yeah. 362 00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:21,520 It's good. 363 00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:23,800 Robert Downey Jr as Charlie Chaplin? 364 00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:27,160 Now, that's gotta be 20, 25 years ago, that? 365 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:28,750 - Yeah. - Very good, very good. 366 00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:31,990 Yeah, I've been offered, the role of Charlie Chaplin in a new film. 367 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:33,120 - Seriously? - That script? 368 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,440 - Yeah. - Oh, right, oh, my God. 369 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:37,870 When you say offered, actually offered or they want you to come and read? 370 00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:40,520 They… No, that, I don't read any more, Rob. 371 00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:44,150 - I bet you would if it was Spielberg. - No, I don't. 372 00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:45,560 - Scorsese. - I'd go and meet them 373 00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:47,296 - and I'd go and talk to them. - But you wouldn't read? 374 00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:48,320 No, I wouldn't read, no. 375 00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:50,040 Steve, they really want you to read. "No." 376 00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:52,120 - Maybe I would, maybe I wouldn't. - I admire that. 377 00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:53,496 - So you would read? Okay. - I would read. 378 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:57,400 But anyway, the thing is, Charlie Chaplin is as good as an offer. 379 00:14:57,480 --> 00:15:00,040 - But it's a… - Okay, so another silent comedian. 380 00:15:00,120 --> 00:15:01,776 - You could have a box set. - Well, it's a… No. 381 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,440 Stan and Ollie II. The Dictatorial Years. 382 00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,696 - Stan and Ollie wasn't silent. - Some of their stuff was. 383 00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:09,520 Some of the very early stuff was, but they're famous for their talkies. 384 00:15:09,600 --> 00:15:11,856 It's another fine mess you've got me into, you have to hear that. 385 00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:13,576 - Was that a silent one? - Well, it wasn't silent. 386 00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:15,176 You have to hear the sentence, remember. 387 00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:17,496 The one way out west, with the blue ridge mountains of Virginia, 388 00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:19,736 now tell me, was that a silent movie or was that with sound. 389 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,400 So you're reinforcing my point, the film I've been offered… 390 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:23,480 Yeah, tell us about it. 391 00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:25,600 … is a film as Chaplin making The Great Dictator. 392 00:15:25,680 --> 00:15:27,160 I could see you as a dictator. 393 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,200 - Thank you. - That's in your palette, I would say. 394 00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:32,550 Yeah, well, you know, I can humanise anybody. 395 00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:34,480 I don't know about that. 396 00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,280 - Yeah. - So you'd be playing Hitler. 397 00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:37,870 Now, that I would like to see. 398 00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:39,336 No, I'd be playing Charlie Chaplin. 399 00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:41,016 With a little moustache. What would you look… Show me… 400 00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,736 Put a little bit of something, just do that with your finger. 401 00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:44,190 Or stick a bit of squid there. 402 00:15:46,160 --> 00:15:47,560 He won't thank you for that after. 403 00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:49,336 He'll have a word with you later. 404 00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:50,840 What the hell were you doing when… 405 00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:53,480 When he said the thing about the moustache, why? Why? 406 00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:55,136 - For the Hitler. - Don't you work for me? 407 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:57,280 - … for God's sake. - This is to pay your wages. 408 00:15:57,400 --> 00:15:58,536 Why'd you make me look like Hitler? 409 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:01,310 Jesus, what, what, what… I might as well have a man working for me. 410 00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:04,600 Would you do the German voice? 411 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:06,776 What are you like with voices? You good with voices? 412 00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:07,800 Thanks, darling. 413 00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:10,990 Um, I would do… I don't know, I'm not… I've not… 414 00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:12,510 I take my time. 415 00:16:14,160 --> 00:16:15,230 I'd take my time. 416 00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:17,840 And I'd just do something that was approaching funny 417 00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:19,400 but not cheap and disposable. 418 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:21,630 Have you heard my German porn voice? 419 00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:23,270 - German porn? - Yeah. 420 00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:25,016 - I haven't had the pleasure. - Wanna hear? 421 00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:26,440 - I would love to hear it. - Please. 422 00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:30,160 Sounds quite tired. 423 00:16:41,640 --> 00:16:43,160 He's loving it, isn't he? Look at that. 424 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,480 - I could do that. - That's actually quite risky. 425 00:16:45,560 --> 00:16:48,080 Did I tell you about the time I free climbed Helm Crag? 426 00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:50,830 - Yes, you did. - What is he doing? 427 00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:52,840 - Whoa. - Oh, my God. 428 00:16:52,920 --> 00:16:53,920 That's bad. 429 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,800 You could be nastily thrown against the rocks. 430 00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:56,880 I couldn't do that. 431 00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:58,360 So, and here we have… 432 00:16:58,480 --> 00:16:59,880 Ah, oh, wow. 433 00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:00,960 - Shellfishes. - Nice. 434 00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:02,040 - Thank you. - Enjoy. 435 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:05,600 - That looks so good. - Thank you. 436 00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:07,990 - It looks lovely. - Oh, amazing. 437 00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:09,616 Now this reminds me of when the tide goes out. 438 00:17:09,640 --> 00:17:11,776 Are we meant to just slurp this like you would an oyster? 439 00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,216 - I think you do. - What do you do with it? 440 00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:14,336 You do that, you do it like… 441 00:17:14,360 --> 00:17:15,416 I think we do, I think you do. 442 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:17,056 - My God. - Isn't it like just fresh oyster 443 00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:19,230 that's like with that smothered in garlic? 444 00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:21,120 - That is amazing. - That is gorgeous. 445 00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:24,230 Why did it take Odysseus so long to get back from Troy? 446 00:17:24,320 --> 00:17:25,320 It's not that far. 447 00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:27,310 He was blown off course and got distracted. 448 00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:30,070 Spent seven years on an island being massaged by Calypso. 449 00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:31,590 - Exactly. - Easily done. 450 00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:34,400 - Yeah. - Promising him immortality if he'd stay 451 00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:37,280 but, of course, he couldn't stay because… 452 00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:39,896 - He wants to get home to… - … he had a wife, a child and a father 453 00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:42,416 that he wanted to get back to and he eventually went back to them. 454 00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,400 - Yeah. - Yeah. Hey, how is your dad? 455 00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:47,390 He's Okay. Well, he's not okay, but… 456 00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:48,830 Isn't he? 457 00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:51,430 - But, you know, Joe is with him… - Okay. 458 00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:53,670 Which is good. 459 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:58,600 But he's found it quite difficult being alone 460 00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:02,880 since my mum died. 461 00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:04,680 I'm sorry. 462 00:18:05,760 --> 00:18:07,270 But, yeah, he's staying with his mum. 463 00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:08,750 - Is he? - Yeah. 464 00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:12,360 Well, Joe is a credit to her, and you, of course. 465 00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:14,470 Thank you. 466 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:22,840 The thing about ancient Greek poetry is it was originally set to music. 467 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:25,880 That, the lyrics, you see, that's where they say lyric poetry. 468 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:27,470 Yeah, yeah. 469 00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:29,456 Yes, but the most important bit in the story he's missed out 470 00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:30,600 'cause I told him the story. 471 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:31,870 - Okay. - FYI. 472 00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:34,870 - These poems were done to music. - Yeah, like, yeah, yeah, yeah. 473 00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:36,256 But he's gonna tell you about the lyre. 474 00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:37,950 - A lyre. - A lyre, yeah. 475 00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:40,760 Lyric comes from the word lyre which is a thing like this. Actually… 476 00:18:40,840 --> 00:18:42,536 - Like a small guitar, like a violin. - I know what a lyre is. 477 00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:43,560 It's sort of… Brrrung. 478 00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,816 Leonard Cohen did it the other way round 'cause he wrote poetry 479 00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:48,070 and then to get the poetry more out there, 480 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:49,510 he started setting it to music. 481 00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:51,376 - Well, that is what they did. - That's what I just said. 482 00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:52,736 - Rob has just said. - But didn't they start… 483 00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:54,416 - But didn't they start… - They didn't start with the music, 484 00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:55,920 - they started with the poetry. - Yes. 485 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:59,030 So, if you think, so Sappho, you know Sappho, yes? 486 00:18:59,120 --> 00:19:01,720 - Yes, I know Sappho. - That's very much like Leonard Cohen 487 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:06,430 or Alanis Morissette or Neil Diamond or anybody you want to… 488 00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:08,600 Hands up who's met Neil Diamond, just me. 489 00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:10,360 - You know, that's… - You haven't met Neil… 490 00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:12,030 I did a… You probably didn't watch it. 491 00:19:12,120 --> 00:19:14,320 - I did an ITV special with Neil Diamond, - Did you? 492 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:15,896 I spent five days with him in New York. 493 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:17,990 - About four years ago. - Really? Wow. 494 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:19,800 Went to Brooklyn with him. 495 00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:20,880 ♪ Honey pie 496 00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:24,110 Martin Sheen sings the very best of Neil Diamond. 497 00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:25,430 ♪ You're gonna make them cry ♪ 498 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:26,720 What are you doing now? 499 00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:28,496 Well, I don't really try to do my… To do my… 500 00:19:28,520 --> 00:19:30,400 - Not when it's not good. No. - My Neil Diamond. 501 00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:32,176 Well, no, I'm not… I can do, but I'm not a bad one. 502 00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:33,976 - No, it's not a bad one. - Love on the Rocks. 503 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,350 ♪ Anal surprise ♪ 504 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:38,830 What, anal surprise? That's what everyone used to sing. 505 00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:41,336 Is that what you said? I wasn't laughing at that, 506 00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:43,216 - I was laughing at the impression. - The impression. 507 00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:44,336 I was laughing at the voice. 508 00:19:44,360 --> 00:19:45,590 ♪ Ain't no surprise 509 00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:47,030 ♪ Money it talks 510 00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:48,270 ♪ Money talks ♪ 511 00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:49,480 That's what I said. 512 00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:50,560 You don't… 513 00:19:50,640 --> 00:19:52,470 ♪ It don't sing and dance and it don't walk ♪ 514 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:54,656 You do the technical voice but you never have any real volume. 515 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:56,376 One minute you say I don't do the technical thing, 516 00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:57,816 then you say I do a caricature, now I'm doing it. 517 00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:00,440 It's like a little, look… It's like little Neil Diamond in a box. 518 00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:01,720 That would be… 519 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,550 - You don't really… - That would be this… 520 00:20:08,120 --> 00:20:09,120 Totally surreal. 521 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:10,536 Well, that's just little man in a box 522 00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:12,160 doing the lyrics to a Neil Diamond song. 523 00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:14,230 - He, but he had it… - Thank you, Emma. 524 00:20:14,360 --> 00:20:15,710 He had a little… Come on. 525 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:17,390 ♪ Maybe tonight 526 00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:18,656 - ♪ Maybe tonight - ♪ Maybe tonight ♪ 527 00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:19,856 Well, let's do it at the same time. 528 00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:20,936 - Yeah? - Can you do the high notes? 529 00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:22,950 - Give me a challenge. - No, well, it's… 530 00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:25,110 ♪ Hello again, hello ♪ 531 00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:26,200 It's gotta go down. 532 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:27,280 I think it's gonna go up. 533 00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:30,990 ♪ I think about you every night 534 00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:33,600 - ♪ Sweet Caroline - ♪ Sweet Caroline 535 00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:36,240 - ♪ Sweet Caroline - ♪ Sweet Caroline 536 00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:37,910 ♪ Good times never seemed so good 537 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,830 ♪ Sweet Caroline 538 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:44,320 ♪ Good times, good times never seemed so good 539 00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:48,360 ♪ I've been inclined, boop, boop, boo 540 00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:52,070 ♪ To believe they never would ♪ 541 00:21:02,120 --> 00:21:04,560 - What delights do you have for us? - Oh, my goodness me. 542 00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:06,280 - Wow. - Wow, what? 543 00:21:06,360 --> 00:21:07,960 - Yeah. - Is there really another course? 544 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:10,750 - There you are. Please enjoy. - Thank you. 545 00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:11,960 - You're welcome. - Wow. 546 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:13,320 Thank you very much. 547 00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:14,960 - Here you are, sir. - Thank you. 548 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:16,270 - Enjoy. - Delicious. 549 00:21:16,360 --> 00:21:19,030 I love Greece, the history, the culture. 550 00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:22,390 Did you notice they are playing Oedipus tonight at the Epidaurus? 551 00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:24,760 - Really? - When I first saw that theatre, 552 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:27,160 I thought it was called not the Epidaurus but the epidural. 553 00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:30,990 Aristophanes, 2,500 years old, his material, 554 00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:32,720 that's older than Rob's material. 555 00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:33,800 That's… 556 00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:35,536 It's longer than you've been doing Partridge, isn't it? 557 00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:38,000 What's that? 27 years? That's a hell of a long time. 558 00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:40,640 Yeah, well, always new material though, Rob. 559 00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:43,840 My favourite Greek philosopher is Epicurus. 560 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:45,936 So, let's be clear on this. A lot of people when they come up to me, 561 00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:48,680 the question I get asked the most is about Steve. 562 00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:51,640 What's he really like? Is the first one, all right. 563 00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:54,040 And the next one is, who's his favourite Greek philosopher? 564 00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:57,150 - Rob, we'd love to know. - I can imagine. 565 00:21:57,240 --> 00:21:59,880 He's played his cards pretty close to his chest, who is it, Rob? 566 00:21:59,960 --> 00:22:02,790 Is it Aristotle? Is it Socrates? I say, I can't tell you. 567 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:04,950 It's interesting, that he makes fun of that, 568 00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:08,080 but the reason that's funny is because the idea of one of Rob's audience 569 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,550 knowing anything about Greek philosophy is ridiculous. 570 00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:11,936 They're old enough to know Steve, aren't they? 571 00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:13,016 They're old enough to know. 572 00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:14,376 - Such a ridiculous idea. - Maybe they were around 573 00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:15,656 at the time it happened, how about that? 574 00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:17,240 Well, that's you, that'd be… 575 00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:18,376 I'm making a genuine observation 576 00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:20,296 that I would reckon most of the people in your audience don't know 577 00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:23,840 diddly squat about Greek philosophy or Greek mythology. 578 00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:26,070 We are epicureans, we're enjoying food and wine. 579 00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:27,696 You know, people think about epicurean pleasure 580 00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:31,510 as being something like, just hedonistic delighting in the moment 581 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:32,920 but it's more than that. 582 00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:34,736 Epicurus said there were two kinds of pleasure, 583 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:37,910 there was kinetic pleasure, and static pleasure. 584 00:22:38,040 --> 00:22:40,640 Kinetic pleasure would be being cold outside, you're very cold, 585 00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:42,790 and you go inside and there's a lovely warm fire. 586 00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:46,680 Whereas static pleasure is not to be too cold or too hot, 587 00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:49,960 but to be in a room that has the correct temperature, so you are comfortable. 588 00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:51,936 So, I'm static and you're kinetic, is that what you're saying? 589 00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:53,536 - Exactly. - Is that where you're going here? 590 00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:56,360 I would rather be static, I don't want peaks and troughs. 591 00:22:56,440 --> 00:22:58,376 You probably like little peaks and troughs, don't you? 592 00:22:58,400 --> 00:23:00,230 Thank you. Exactly. Little ones. 593 00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:01,400 Just not extreme ones. 594 00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:04,680 But I don't want… I don't wanna be a cork in the ocean, you know? 595 00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:10,160 I might go for a dive later, if you… 596 00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:11,280 - Really? - Yeah. 597 00:23:11,360 --> 00:23:12,360 Okay. 598 00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,096 I can't do a backflip like that, but I can swallow dive. 599 00:23:14,120 --> 00:23:15,400 What's swallow dive? 600 00:23:15,480 --> 00:23:17,760 Well, you have to put your arms out like this 601 00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:20,550 because if you do this, if you do it from a great height, 602 00:23:20,640 --> 00:23:21,710 - if you do this, - Yeah. 603 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,416 You just go over onto your back, so you have to… 604 00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:25,056 Your centre of gravity, at your chest, right, 605 00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:27,376 doing this, and then bring your arms in at the last minute, yeah. 606 00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:28,400 Okay. 607 00:23:29,680 --> 00:23:32,040 Hey, Chloe. How you doing? You all right? 608 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:34,040 I'm good. 609 00:23:34,120 --> 00:23:35,550 Good, how was school today? 610 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:37,800 Hey, Joe, it's Dad. 611 00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:40,760 Hi, Dad. I've just been to see Granddad. 612 00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:42,230 All right, go on. 613 00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:46,080 He's a bit woozy, they've had to run a few more tests. 614 00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:48,190 Are you gonna miss Mummy when she comes out? 615 00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:50,320 Yeah. 616 00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:52,150 I'm gonna go back in to see him tonight. 617 00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:54,560 Brilliant. That's good. 618 00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:55,870 Yeah, Mum's gonna drive me. 619 00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:57,960 Great, that's fantastic. How is she? 620 00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:01,480 No, she's good, yeah, yeah, she said to say hello. 621 00:24:01,560 --> 00:24:04,360 Okay, well, yeah, say hello back to her, so… 622 00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:08,350 And thank you for, obviously, stepping into the fray. 623 00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:10,080 It'll be fun with Granny though, won't it? 624 00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:14,840 Yeah, good forehead, darling, well done. Hello. 625 00:24:26,120 --> 00:24:27,120 Good luck. 626 00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:31,270 Miss Jones. Miss Jones, 627 00:24:31,360 --> 00:24:33,160 you look wonderful tonight, Miss Jones. 628 00:24:33,240 --> 00:24:34,520 Thank you, as do you. 629 00:24:35,120 --> 00:24:37,870 The Himalayas are unmistakeable, Miss Jones. 630 00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:38,960 Yeah. 631 00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:41,616 Would you join me, Miss Jones, on the terrace for a drink? Would you? 632 00:24:41,640 --> 00:24:44,390 I'm just wondering where Leonard Cohen's house might have been. 633 00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:46,616 He had a house on here, do you think he's got a blue plaque, 634 00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:47,990 "Leonard Cohen lived here"? 635 00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:52,040 Oh, yes, I would think so. I mean, Lennon and McCartney had them. 636 00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:57,440 Bravo! 637 00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:04,440 It's not really high enough to do a proper swallow dive. 638 00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:06,190 No, I think that was perfect. 639 00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:09,630 Well, actually it's rather… This is a very difficult dive. 640 00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:11,880 You've got to arch your back, you see, 641 00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:15,190 and if you don't get the right entry, it's lethal. 642 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:16,280 God. 643 00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:18,960 You know they're gonna have fireworks later? 644 00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:21,270 How do you know? 645 00:25:21,360 --> 00:25:22,680 Because I've been here before. 646 00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:24,470 I thought you were being metaphorical.