1 00:00:01,534 --> 00:00:02,978 - Valco. - Serves you right. 2 00:00:03,078 --> 00:00:05,455 - I'm quite nervous. - You won't beat our prices. 3 00:00:05,555 --> 00:00:07,505 - Can she stop that now? - If you get it anywhere cheaper, 4 00:00:07,505 --> 00:00:09,924 I'll come round and cook it myself. - Red hot deals. 5 00:00:10,024 --> 00:00:12,418 - We've got offers on everything from booze to biscuits. 6 00:00:12,418 --> 00:00:14,834 - Loads of two for ones. 7 00:00:14,934 --> 00:00:16,481 - We have fresh produce. - Delivered daily. 8 00:00:16,481 --> 00:00:18,309 - Don't forget the Valco tick. - That way. 9 00:00:18,409 --> 00:00:20,108 - Am I getting paid for this? 10 00:00:20,208 --> 00:00:20,941 - Boom. 11 00:00:21,041 --> 00:00:22,749 - [Both] Valco, serves you right. 12 00:00:22,849 --> 00:00:24,863 - Valco, serves you right. 13 00:00:24,963 --> 00:00:27,630 - [All] Valco, serves you right! 14 00:00:38,652 --> 00:00:40,243 - Isn't it exciting? 15 00:00:40,343 --> 00:00:41,699 We're going to be expanded! 16 00:00:41,799 --> 00:00:43,804 - I must say, I'm already bubbling with ideas. 17 00:00:43,904 --> 00:00:46,193 Oh, maybe we can finally give pet foods its own area 18 00:00:46,293 --> 00:00:47,884 away from home baking. 19 00:00:47,984 --> 00:00:50,068 - And to think I said it could never be done. 20 00:00:50,168 --> 00:00:51,427 - Oh, look, there's Richard. 21 00:00:51,527 --> 00:00:52,950 "CU in five"? 22 00:00:53,050 --> 00:00:54,101 - Oh, it's text speak. 23 00:00:54,201 --> 00:00:55,545 "See you in five". 24 00:00:55,645 --> 00:00:57,849 - Oh, God, why the man can't use full sentences 25 00:00:57,949 --> 00:00:59,750 on a mobile phone is beyond me. 26 00:00:59,850 --> 00:01:01,483 Oh, now, did you have any joy 27 00:01:01,583 --> 00:01:03,257 with the till supervisor interviews? 28 00:01:03,357 --> 00:01:04,665 - Oh, useless, the lot of them. 29 00:01:04,765 --> 00:01:06,483 - Do you know who I think would be perfect? 30 00:01:06,583 --> 00:01:07,923 Young Katie. 31 00:01:08,023 --> 00:01:09,740 - Gavin, are you on magic mushrooms? 32 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:13,573 - I think it could be just the push that she needs. 33 00:01:13,673 --> 00:01:17,840 - I'll give her a go but I really don't think she's ready. 34 00:01:19,127 --> 00:01:21,788 Oh, it's a winking face, sticking its tongue out. 35 00:01:21,888 --> 00:01:22,621 - Oh, God. 36 00:01:22,721 --> 00:01:26,221 What was ever wrong with a simple "hello"? 37 00:01:27,175 --> 00:01:29,925 - "Room available, NS prof pref?" 38 00:01:31,012 --> 00:01:32,849 - Non-smoking professional preferred. 39 00:01:32,949 --> 00:01:33,782 - B.I.N. 40 00:01:34,620 --> 00:01:36,398 - You want to be careful moving in with a random. 41 00:01:36,398 --> 00:01:38,692 You've already done that once with Emma, remember? 42 00:01:38,792 --> 00:01:39,525 - Ha-ha. 43 00:01:39,625 --> 00:01:40,995 I ain't got much choice, have I? 44 00:01:41,095 --> 00:01:43,034 The only offer I've had is my mate Pete in Newquay, 45 00:01:43,034 --> 00:01:44,746 and I don't think I'm up for the commute. 46 00:01:44,846 --> 00:01:46,017 - Mate of mine, Jacko, 47 00:01:46,117 --> 00:01:48,163 moved in a place he found in the paper. 48 00:01:48,263 --> 00:01:50,352 The other bloke who lived there is all, 49 00:01:50,452 --> 00:01:52,412 "Don't look in that other room". 50 00:01:52,512 --> 00:01:54,513 - Why didn't he want him to look in the other room? 51 00:01:54,613 --> 00:01:56,326 - Cos it never happened? 52 00:01:56,426 --> 00:01:57,850 - That's the thing, Margaret. 53 00:01:57,950 --> 00:01:59,592 Jacko thinks to himself one night, 54 00:01:59,692 --> 00:02:03,222 "Gonna have a look in there." So, what do you think he saw? 55 00:02:03,322 --> 00:02:04,055 - A murder? 56 00:02:04,155 --> 00:02:06,068 - A pile of bullshit? 57 00:02:06,168 --> 00:02:09,039 - A chimp, dressed as a baby, sleeping in a crib. 58 00:02:09,139 --> 00:02:09,988 - Yeah, right! 59 00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:10,821 - Swear to God. 60 00:02:10,921 --> 00:02:12,130 He moved out the next day. 61 00:02:12,230 --> 00:02:15,016 Don't say you haven't been warned. 62 00:02:15,116 --> 00:02:16,590 - Gavin. 63 00:02:16,690 --> 00:02:18,300 How's it hanging? 64 00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,037 - Great, thank you, Richard. 65 00:02:20,137 --> 00:02:20,870 You? 66 00:02:20,970 --> 00:02:22,470 - Amazing dot com. 67 00:02:24,015 --> 00:02:25,696 Here you are, got you a smoothie. 68 00:02:25,796 --> 00:02:26,932 Boom! 69 00:02:27,032 --> 00:02:29,032 It's a brainberry blitz. 70 00:02:30,780 --> 00:02:32,330 - Thought it might help get 71 00:02:32,430 --> 00:02:34,811 our brainstorming juices flowing. 72 00:02:34,911 --> 00:02:37,166 - Brainberry blitz? 73 00:02:37,266 --> 00:02:39,432 - I had a great chat with H.O. yesterday. 74 00:02:39,532 --> 00:02:42,485 Everyone's creaming themselves about Valco Better. 75 00:02:42,585 --> 00:02:45,462 Shelly's happy for me and you to take the reins. 76 00:02:45,562 --> 00:02:47,070 - Wow, that's fantastic news, 77 00:02:47,170 --> 00:02:48,794 and I've actually been thinking 78 00:02:48,894 --> 00:02:51,814 a little bit about how we might revolutionise the store. 79 00:02:51,914 --> 00:02:52,914 - Brilliant. 80 00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:55,340 Shoot. 81 00:02:56,743 --> 00:02:59,202 - Well, and stop me if you think that this is too mad, 82 00:02:59,302 --> 00:03:01,310 but what if we were to finally move pet foods 83 00:03:01,410 --> 00:03:05,077 into its own section, away from home-baking? 84 00:03:06,738 --> 00:03:09,988 I think that could really, really work. 85 00:03:12,144 --> 00:03:14,895 - And with double points available for the entire week, 86 00:03:14,995 --> 00:03:18,828 why not go that extra mile and treat yourself? 87 00:03:20,195 --> 00:03:21,992 - We'd also like to remind customers 88 00:03:22,092 --> 00:03:24,093 all baby goods are on aisle four. 89 00:03:24,193 --> 00:03:25,620 - Ah, Sue! 90 00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:28,052 Oh, you're back and you've got a baby! 91 00:03:28,152 --> 00:03:29,949 Aw, let me see him. 92 00:03:30,049 --> 00:03:30,814 - Here he is. 93 00:03:30,914 --> 00:03:33,121 Say hello to your godmother, John. 94 00:03:33,221 --> 00:03:36,101 - Aw, he looks so interesting. 95 00:03:36,201 --> 00:03:37,256 Hello, little Johnny. 96 00:03:37,356 --> 00:03:38,410 - Oh, don't call him that. 97 00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:41,260 You make him sound like a condom. 98 00:03:43,792 --> 00:03:44,729 - Tell you what? 99 00:03:44,829 --> 00:03:46,254 Let's square one this shit. 100 00:03:46,354 --> 00:03:47,604 Yeah, simplify. 101 00:03:48,872 --> 00:03:50,372 Words on the wall. 102 00:03:52,710 --> 00:03:55,613 - Oh, no, Richard, you can't write on the wall! 103 00:03:55,713 --> 00:03:57,254 - Spoiler alert, Gav. 104 00:03:57,354 --> 00:03:58,241 I just did. 105 00:03:58,341 --> 00:04:00,424 Right, I'll start us off. 106 00:04:04,768 --> 00:04:05,914 Fresh. 107 00:04:06,014 --> 00:04:07,592 - Sorry, fresh? Fresh, fresh what? 108 00:04:07,692 --> 00:04:08,535 - Just fresh. 109 00:04:08,635 --> 00:04:10,136 Right, come on, your turn, 110 00:04:10,236 --> 00:04:12,798 just say whatever comes in to your head. Go! 111 00:04:15,298 --> 00:04:17,538 - Moving pet food away from home-baking. 112 00:04:17,638 --> 00:04:19,224 - That one's not going in the bag. 113 00:04:19,324 --> 00:04:21,203 - Bag? What bag? 114 00:04:21,303 --> 00:04:23,053 - The good ideas bag. 115 00:04:28,515 --> 00:04:29,729 - Salmon. - Salmon. 116 00:04:29,829 --> 00:04:31,134 - Sole. - Sole. 117 00:04:31,234 --> 00:04:32,234 - Cod. - Cod. 118 00:04:34,084 --> 00:04:36,001 - Mackerel. - Mackerel. 119 00:04:36,101 --> 00:04:37,558 - Monkfish. - Monkfish. 120 00:04:37,658 --> 00:04:38,916 - Sole. 121 00:04:39,016 --> 00:04:41,502 - Oh, fiddler on the roof. 122 00:04:41,602 --> 00:04:43,352 - Oh, Gav, have you got a minute? 123 00:04:43,452 --> 00:04:45,374 - Well, not really, Andy, I'm a bit busy. 124 00:04:45,474 --> 00:04:47,278 - I've been having a think about this expansion 125 00:04:47,278 --> 00:04:49,763 and I think it gives us a chance to make a real statement 126 00:04:49,863 --> 00:04:50,954 with the meat counter. 127 00:04:51,054 --> 00:04:52,408 - Oh, really. How exactly? 128 00:04:52,508 --> 00:04:54,495 - We expand my area to create 129 00:04:54,595 --> 00:04:57,877 the longest meat counter in Europe. 130 00:04:57,977 --> 00:05:00,102 The current longest one's in Oggersheim, Germany. 131 00:05:00,102 --> 00:05:00,944 30 metres. 132 00:05:01,044 --> 00:05:03,134 We could go 40 metres plus. 133 00:05:03,234 --> 00:05:05,804 - A 40-metre meat counter? 134 00:05:05,904 --> 00:05:07,263 What, with just two staff on it? 135 00:05:07,363 --> 00:05:08,823 Andy, are you out of your mind? 136 00:05:08,923 --> 00:05:11,042 - No, no, I'd need a bigger team, obviously. 137 00:05:11,142 --> 00:05:14,962 I'll stay head butcher, maybe bring in a dozen or so new guys. 138 00:05:15,062 --> 00:05:15,895 - Thank you, Andrew. 139 00:05:15,895 --> 00:05:17,876 Rest assured I shall not be passing your idea 140 00:05:17,976 --> 00:05:19,356 on to Richard France. 141 00:05:19,456 --> 00:05:22,206 - Fine! Let Oggersheim win, again. 142 00:05:26,979 --> 00:05:28,439 - Sole, salmon. - Sole, salmon. 143 00:05:28,539 --> 00:05:29,341 - Sole, salmon. 144 00:05:29,441 --> 00:05:31,804 - Cod, mackerel. - Cod, mackerel. 145 00:05:31,904 --> 00:05:32,663 Monkfish. 146 00:05:32,763 --> 00:05:34,840 - Call me if it gets too much for you. 147 00:05:34,940 --> 00:05:37,871 This is, after all, considerably above your skill level. 148 00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:38,704 - Cheers. 149 00:05:38,804 --> 00:05:39,888 - Cheers? 150 00:05:39,988 --> 00:05:42,228 You can forget that kind of talk for a start. 151 00:05:42,328 --> 00:05:44,857 Till supervisors don't say "cheers". 152 00:05:44,957 --> 00:05:46,629 They say "thank you, madam". 153 00:05:46,729 --> 00:05:48,026 - Thank you, madam. 154 00:05:48,126 --> 00:05:49,341 - Yes, well, try and see 155 00:05:49,441 --> 00:05:51,348 if you can keep it going as best you can. 156 00:05:51,448 --> 00:05:53,200 See if you can manage it for a day. 157 00:05:53,300 --> 00:05:55,383 - I'll do my best, madam. 158 00:05:57,627 --> 00:05:59,176 - Nice clipboard. 159 00:05:59,276 --> 00:06:00,651 You my boss now, then, are you? 160 00:06:00,751 --> 00:06:01,484 - No. 161 00:06:01,584 --> 00:06:03,326 - Well, that's what a boss would say. 162 00:06:03,426 --> 00:06:04,159 - No, it isn't. 163 00:06:04,259 --> 00:06:06,987 - Proved my point. Typical boss. 164 00:06:07,087 --> 00:06:08,881 - Anything you need, Katie, just let me know. 165 00:06:08,981 --> 00:06:10,278 I'm happy to go the extra mile. 166 00:06:10,378 --> 00:06:12,097 - You don't have to try and impress me, Neville. 167 00:06:12,097 --> 00:06:13,804 - Understood. Still, anything at all. 168 00:06:13,904 --> 00:06:15,237 - Oh, kiss arse. 169 00:06:16,380 --> 00:06:17,213 - Hello. 170 00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:22,046 - Hello, Kieran. 171 00:06:22,904 --> 00:06:23,708 - Hi, Keith. 172 00:06:23,808 --> 00:06:24,788 Is everything all right, is it? 173 00:06:24,788 --> 00:06:26,960 - Oh, yeah. Brilliant. 174 00:06:27,060 --> 00:06:30,486 Can I get six pork and leek sausages, please? 175 00:06:30,586 --> 00:06:31,669 - Yeah, sure. 176 00:06:36,345 --> 00:06:37,078 How's Emma? 177 00:06:37,178 --> 00:06:40,098 - And can I get 15 grand as well? 178 00:06:40,198 --> 00:06:42,440 - Oh, I'm afraid we don't do cashback here. 179 00:06:42,540 --> 00:06:43,498 - It's all right, Margaret. 180 00:06:43,498 --> 00:06:45,934 - No, I was asking Kieran, personally, for 15 grand. 181 00:06:46,034 --> 00:06:49,265 You see, thanks to him, I splashed out 15 grand 182 00:06:49,365 --> 00:06:50,706 on my daughter's wedding. 183 00:06:50,806 --> 00:06:51,539 - Look, Keith-- 184 00:06:51,639 --> 00:06:53,866 - I thought it might be nice to see some of that money back again. 185 00:06:53,866 --> 00:06:56,024 Maybe spend it cheering m'daughter up. 186 00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:58,451 Going through a divorce, thanks to him. 187 00:06:58,551 --> 00:06:59,640 - I'm a bit confused. 188 00:06:59,740 --> 00:07:01,289 I mean, do you want cashback or not? 189 00:07:01,389 --> 00:07:03,259 - No, Margaret, this is Keith, Emma's dad. 190 00:07:03,359 --> 00:07:06,824 - Oh, hello, nice to meet you, Keith. 191 00:07:06,924 --> 00:07:08,057 If you ask at the tills, 192 00:07:08,157 --> 00:07:12,159 they should let you know about the cashback. 193 00:07:12,259 --> 00:07:13,509 - There you go. 194 00:07:15,007 --> 00:07:15,948 Look, I know things aren't ideal. 195 00:07:15,948 --> 00:07:18,865 - Bye, Kieran. I'll see you around. 196 00:07:20,277 --> 00:07:24,471 - Oh, Kieran, you've got a really nice father-in-law. 197 00:07:24,571 --> 00:07:26,904 Bit simple, though, in't he? 198 00:07:32,837 --> 00:07:35,370 - Richard, I don't think we should have three people 199 00:07:35,470 --> 00:07:37,561 off the shop floor at one time! 200 00:07:37,661 --> 00:07:39,577 And especially security. 201 00:07:39,677 --> 00:07:41,296 We could be looted! 202 00:07:41,396 --> 00:07:43,682 - Aw, someone takes a bag of rice. 203 00:07:43,782 --> 00:07:47,225 He gives us the next big idea in retail. 204 00:07:47,325 --> 00:07:48,249 Who's been looted? 205 00:07:48,349 --> 00:07:50,349 Answer, the competition. 206 00:07:51,381 --> 00:07:55,522 Right, kid, how would you make Valco better? 207 00:07:55,622 --> 00:07:58,023 - Well, we're already the best thing in the world 208 00:07:58,123 --> 00:08:00,576 but I've always thought the trolleys were a bit boring. 209 00:08:00,676 --> 00:08:03,611 It might be more fun if they were remote controlled. 210 00:08:03,711 --> 00:08:05,376 - Remote-controlled trolleys? 211 00:08:05,476 --> 00:08:07,756 - Yes, Leighton has always had a wild imagination. 212 00:08:07,856 --> 00:08:09,608 - I love it! What are you on, kid? 213 00:08:09,708 --> 00:08:11,823 Cos whatever it is, I want it in my smoothie. 214 00:08:11,923 --> 00:08:13,840 - I'm on £6.50 an hour. 215 00:08:16,164 --> 00:08:17,795 - It's a good one, kid. 216 00:08:17,895 --> 00:08:19,059 What about you, Andy? 217 00:08:19,159 --> 00:08:20,659 - I'm a meat man, Mr France. 218 00:08:20,759 --> 00:08:22,629 Always have been, always will be. 219 00:08:22,729 --> 00:08:26,376 The one thing we don't do is meat with ambition. 220 00:08:26,476 --> 00:08:27,946 - All right, I'm listening. 221 00:08:28,046 --> 00:08:29,506 - Oggersheim, Germany. 222 00:08:29,606 --> 00:08:30,950 - Oh, not that again. 223 00:08:31,050 --> 00:08:33,138 - The longest meat counter in Europe. 224 00:08:33,238 --> 00:08:35,265 I say we take that title, 225 00:08:35,365 --> 00:08:38,757 make Europe's longest meat counter right here in Warrington. 226 00:08:38,857 --> 00:08:40,856 - I love it. It's headline-grabbing. 227 00:08:40,956 --> 00:08:42,330 Great pitch, A-bomb. 228 00:08:42,430 --> 00:08:45,037 You've just made your way in to the bag. 229 00:08:45,137 --> 00:08:46,229 - Pies. 230 00:08:46,329 --> 00:08:48,114 We should have more pies in the canteen. 231 00:08:48,214 --> 00:08:49,512 We hardly ever have them. 232 00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:53,029 Maybe even a pie day when it's just pies. 233 00:08:54,341 --> 00:08:56,341 - Pie day! Top thinking! 234 00:08:58,410 --> 00:09:00,079 Gavbo, your turn! 235 00:09:00,179 --> 00:09:00,912 - Oh, right. 236 00:09:01,012 --> 00:09:03,649 An extra four metres of shelf space on homeware. 237 00:09:03,749 --> 00:09:07,916 If the numbers go up, they can make a real difference. 238 00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:12,442 - You need to stop thinking about the numbers, Gav, 239 00:09:12,542 --> 00:09:13,304 just let go. 240 00:09:13,404 --> 00:09:15,734 Leighton, don't tell me you've got more gold? 241 00:09:15,834 --> 00:09:16,884 - Yeah. 242 00:09:16,984 --> 00:09:19,606 Sometimes, I get a bit bored of the aisles 243 00:09:19,706 --> 00:09:21,458 because they're all in straight lines. 244 00:09:21,558 --> 00:09:25,391 Maybe it'd be more fun if we re-arranged them into a maze. 245 00:09:25,491 --> 00:09:26,997 - Wow! 246 00:09:27,097 --> 00:09:30,438 See, that, right there, was a wow! 247 00:09:30,538 --> 00:09:31,544 You see that, Gav? 248 00:09:31,644 --> 00:09:34,644 You could learn a lot from Leighton. 249 00:09:38,293 --> 00:09:40,571 - I mean, it does take two to have a divorce. 250 00:09:40,671 --> 00:09:43,079 He's got no right coming in to my work and having a go at me. 251 00:09:43,179 --> 00:09:43,981 - I know, I know. 252 00:09:44,081 --> 00:09:46,354 - I might as well just disappear, make a fresh start. 253 00:09:46,454 --> 00:09:48,245 - You need to find somewhere else to live. 254 00:09:48,345 --> 00:09:50,343 You must have a mate with a spare room. 255 00:09:50,443 --> 00:09:52,853 - Why didn't I think of that before? 256 00:09:52,953 --> 00:09:54,762 Cheers, Katie, watch the counter for me, will you? 257 00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:56,929 - Wait? I can't, I'm busy! 258 00:09:57,798 --> 00:09:59,796 Hey, Sue, you brought the little'un in! 259 00:09:59,896 --> 00:10:02,102 - Yeah, thought I'd come in and show him off. 260 00:10:02,202 --> 00:10:04,607 - Let your auntie Margaret say hello. 261 00:10:04,707 --> 00:10:06,701 Oh, what a bonnie. 262 00:10:06,801 --> 00:10:07,889 Oh, hello. 263 00:10:07,989 --> 00:10:10,771 - D'you wanna hold him? - Oh, no, no thank you. 264 00:10:11,731 --> 00:10:13,313 - No uniforms. - Brilliant. 265 00:10:13,413 --> 00:10:15,285 - Cake day. - Shopping in the dark. 266 00:10:15,385 --> 00:10:19,522 - Someone better call Terry's cos this is all gold. 267 00:10:19,622 --> 00:10:20,957 This bag's nearly full, guys. 268 00:10:21,057 --> 00:10:22,772 Full of awesome. 269 00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:25,321 Andy, got any suggestions? 270 00:10:25,421 --> 00:10:28,086 - Live butchery. - I love it. 271 00:10:28,186 --> 00:10:29,846 What is it? - Right, live butchery. 272 00:10:29,946 --> 00:10:32,638 You know those cookery demonstrations you see, 273 00:10:32,738 --> 00:10:36,082 where they teach people how to cook? It's like that, except you butcher a pig. 274 00:10:36,182 --> 00:10:37,989 - I'm sorry but I think we may have lost touch 275 00:10:37,989 --> 00:10:38,875 with reality here. 276 00:10:38,975 --> 00:10:39,949 - It's brilliant! 277 00:10:40,049 --> 00:10:42,702 Live butchery, showing off a skill. 278 00:10:42,802 --> 00:10:46,223 See, that could really resonate with the B and C River Cottagers. 279 00:10:46,323 --> 00:10:47,492 Putting them in touch with what they're eating. 280 00:10:47,492 --> 00:10:49,212 Boom, Andy. Boom! 281 00:10:49,312 --> 00:10:50,487 - In your face. 282 00:10:50,587 --> 00:10:51,880 - Live butchery. 283 00:10:51,980 --> 00:10:54,136 Oh, what the hell, let's do it today. 284 00:10:54,236 --> 00:10:55,162 - What? 285 00:10:55,262 --> 00:10:56,105 - You what? 286 00:10:56,205 --> 00:10:57,292 - Let's run with the idea. 287 00:10:57,392 --> 00:10:59,024 I'll get you a pig, set it up at the front 288 00:10:59,124 --> 00:11:01,163 and you can do a live butchery demonstration. 289 00:11:01,263 --> 00:11:02,682 - Death on the Nile! 290 00:11:02,782 --> 00:11:05,653 Are you seriously suggesting that Andy chops up a dead pig 291 00:11:05,753 --> 00:11:07,179 in front of the customers? 292 00:11:07,279 --> 00:11:09,243 - It'll be great, trust me. 293 00:11:09,343 --> 00:11:11,283 We'll make a real show of it. Eh, Andy? 294 00:11:12,496 --> 00:11:13,996 - Yeah. Brilliant. 295 00:11:19,598 --> 00:11:24,414 - I just thought, maybe if you wanted the extra rent. 296 00:11:24,514 --> 00:11:26,800 What do you mean, Laura'd not be comfortable with it? 297 00:11:26,900 --> 00:11:29,218 You're my mates, not Emma's. 298 00:11:29,318 --> 00:11:31,651 It's not about taking sides. 299 00:11:33,834 --> 00:11:34,667 - Ready? 300 00:11:35,967 --> 00:11:38,284 - Babies are dead ugly, aren't they? 301 00:11:38,384 --> 00:11:39,117 - Yeah. 302 00:11:39,217 --> 00:11:43,384 Hey, Lisa, just think, do you know what we did this morning. 303 00:11:44,496 --> 00:11:47,023 It creates one of those. 304 00:11:47,123 --> 00:11:48,418 It's amazing, innit? 305 00:11:48,518 --> 00:11:52,962 - You can't get pregnant if it goes on your back. 306 00:11:53,062 --> 00:11:54,153 - Yeah. 307 00:11:54,253 --> 00:11:55,672 - Sole. Sole. 308 00:11:55,772 --> 00:11:56,772 Salmon. Cod. 309 00:11:58,322 --> 00:11:59,322 Salmon. Cod. 310 00:12:00,586 --> 00:12:02,169 Mackerel. Mackerel. 311 00:12:03,790 --> 00:12:04,957 Monkfish. Yes. 312 00:12:06,006 --> 00:12:08,607 - Excuse me, where is your meat aisle? 313 00:12:08,707 --> 00:12:10,129 - Oh, aisle 16. 314 00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:10,962 - Thank you. 315 00:12:11,062 --> 00:12:13,985 I'm going to get the biggest steak for my Gavin. 316 00:12:14,085 --> 00:12:15,419 - You're Anna? 317 00:12:15,519 --> 00:12:17,352 - Wait, you are Julie! 318 00:12:18,484 --> 00:12:21,484 Oh, I am so glad to meet you, Julie! 319 00:12:22,580 --> 00:12:26,381 Oh, I can just tell we're going to be best friends! 320 00:12:26,481 --> 00:12:27,898 There's my Gavin! 321 00:12:30,589 --> 00:12:32,881 - Oh, what a wonderful surpri-- 322 00:12:32,981 --> 00:12:36,325 - Darling, I'm buying you a steak for tonight. 323 00:12:36,425 --> 00:12:38,257 Julie, as a red-blooded man, 324 00:12:38,357 --> 00:12:40,933 I feel Gavin should have at least one steak a day. 325 00:12:41,033 --> 00:12:43,683 - Although I do prefer a nice salad from time to time. 326 00:12:43,783 --> 00:12:47,081 - Gavin, I have to tell you off. 327 00:12:47,181 --> 00:12:51,486 You did not tell me how beautiful Julie is. 328 00:12:51,586 --> 00:12:53,614 - Oh, that's, that's hardly fair, 329 00:12:53,714 --> 00:12:56,701 I said Julie's always turned out very smartly. 330 00:12:56,801 --> 00:12:58,714 - We should go for lunch! Now, the three of us. 331 00:12:58,814 --> 00:13:01,268 - Yeah, no, I've got a bit of a pig emergency to deal with. 332 00:13:01,368 --> 00:13:03,678 - Oh, do you need me with you, at your side? 333 00:13:03,778 --> 00:13:04,845 - No, no, no. I'll see you later. 334 00:13:04,845 --> 00:13:06,802 What a wonderful surprise. 335 00:13:06,902 --> 00:13:09,439 - Me and Julie can get to know each other better! 336 00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:12,039 We have so much to talk about. 337 00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:16,864 - Have you ever butchered a whole pig before? 338 00:13:16,964 --> 00:13:19,208 - Not for years and never on my own. 339 00:13:19,308 --> 00:13:21,096 - You'll be fine, Andy. 340 00:13:21,196 --> 00:13:23,113 - I'm going for a walk. 341 00:13:24,884 --> 00:13:27,003 - You found somewhere to live yet, Kieran? 342 00:13:27,103 --> 00:13:29,926 - To be honest I'm not sure it's worth it, Margaret. 343 00:13:30,026 --> 00:13:31,926 - I thought you wanted a fresh start. 344 00:13:32,026 --> 00:13:33,773 - I'm not gonna get that here, am I? 345 00:13:33,873 --> 00:13:37,588 I'm always gonna run in to Emma, or her family or her friends. 346 00:13:37,688 --> 00:13:39,846 Warrington's just too small. 347 00:13:39,946 --> 00:13:41,237 - Oh, I don't know about that. 348 00:13:41,337 --> 00:13:43,491 We've got a Debenhams. 349 00:13:43,591 --> 00:13:45,341 Can I help you, love? 350 00:13:47,805 --> 00:13:49,473 - Have either of you had your breaks yet? 351 00:13:49,573 --> 00:13:51,939 - Don't worry about me. I'm happy to work through my break. 352 00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:54,720 - No, no, Neville, you have to take a break, it's law. 353 00:13:54,820 --> 00:13:56,439 Right, OK, Neville, you go at three. 354 00:13:56,539 --> 00:13:57,999 Lisa, you're at half past? 355 00:13:58,099 --> 00:14:00,723 - Telling me when I can and can't eat now? 356 00:14:00,823 --> 00:14:02,409 God, you've changed. 357 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:04,668 - I'm just trying to sort your breaks out. 358 00:14:04,768 --> 00:14:06,150 Is half three all right? 359 00:14:06,250 --> 00:14:08,005 - I wanna go at three. 360 00:14:08,105 --> 00:14:09,844 - But I've just put Neville down for three. 361 00:14:09,944 --> 00:14:12,508 - Don't worry about me, boss. I'm happy to work through my break. 362 00:14:12,608 --> 00:14:13,986 - I'm not your boss! 363 00:14:14,086 --> 00:14:15,874 Right, OK, Lisa, you're at three. 364 00:14:15,974 --> 00:14:18,141 Neville, you're half past. 365 00:14:19,060 --> 00:14:20,310 - What a bitch. 366 00:14:22,092 --> 00:14:23,597 - How does that look? 367 00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:25,318 - Amazeballs dot com. 368 00:14:25,418 --> 00:14:27,230 - Please, please, Richard, for the love of God, 369 00:14:27,230 --> 00:14:29,826 please don't go through with this! - Oh, Gavin, chillax. 370 00:14:29,926 --> 00:14:32,205 This is what Valco Better's all about. 371 00:14:32,305 --> 00:14:35,431 Trying things nobody's ever done before, seeing what works. 372 00:14:35,531 --> 00:14:37,863 - There's a reason no-one's ever butchered a whole pig 373 00:14:37,963 --> 00:14:41,027 at the front of a supermarket before. Because it's insane! 374 00:14:41,127 --> 00:14:42,991 - Got your pig. 375 00:14:43,091 --> 00:14:44,179 - Brilliant! 376 00:14:44,279 --> 00:14:47,112 Just stick her on the block, lads. 377 00:14:49,886 --> 00:14:50,969 Look at that. 378 00:14:51,856 --> 00:14:54,427 - I don't know what to say. 379 00:14:54,527 --> 00:14:57,338 This is really happening. - Andy, have a look at her. 380 00:14:57,438 --> 00:14:58,653 - Oh, bloody hell. 381 00:14:58,753 --> 00:15:01,141 - What you reckon? Do you think she'll do? 382 00:15:01,241 --> 00:15:02,470 - Listen, I've been thinking, 383 00:15:02,470 --> 00:15:04,755 I'm used to handling much smaller cuts of meat. 384 00:15:04,855 --> 00:15:06,273 Maybe it'd be better if I just did 385 00:15:06,373 --> 00:15:08,486 a rack of ribs or something. 386 00:15:08,586 --> 00:15:09,319 - Ribs? 387 00:15:09,419 --> 00:15:11,858 No way, we're going for spectacle. 388 00:15:11,958 --> 00:15:13,969 Come on, you should be proud, you had a great idea. 389 00:15:13,969 --> 00:15:16,003 - Yeah, but it's massive. 390 00:15:16,103 --> 00:15:18,596 - So will you be after this. 391 00:15:18,696 --> 00:15:21,311 Even got your name up there. 392 00:15:21,411 --> 00:15:23,078 - You excited, Andy? 393 00:15:24,241 --> 00:15:25,074 - Yep. 394 00:15:25,963 --> 00:15:27,718 - Sole, salmon, cod, mackerel, monkfish. 395 00:15:27,818 --> 00:15:30,543 - Sole, salmon, cod, mackerel, monkfish. 396 00:15:30,643 --> 00:15:32,592 - Salmon, sole, cod, mackerel, monkfish. 397 00:15:32,692 --> 00:15:35,007 - Salmon, sole, cod, mackerel, monkfish. 398 00:15:35,107 --> 00:15:37,425 - Monkfish, salmon, sole, cod, mackerel. 399 00:15:37,525 --> 00:15:40,837 - Monkfish, salmon, sole, cod, mackerel. 400 00:15:40,937 --> 00:15:41,824 - All done. 401 00:15:41,924 --> 00:15:45,068 - Anyway, there are the tills, so I'll leave you to it. 402 00:15:45,168 --> 00:15:48,852 Nice to meet you, Anna. - Oh, so great to meet you, Julie. 403 00:15:48,952 --> 00:15:52,585 I honestly feel like I have met a sister today. 404 00:15:52,685 --> 00:15:53,533 - Really? 405 00:15:53,633 --> 00:15:57,848 - All my life I have wanted a much older sister. 406 00:15:57,948 --> 00:15:59,198 Now I have one. 407 00:16:06,058 --> 00:16:07,439 - Katie. 408 00:16:07,539 --> 00:16:09,569 - Right, I have got a bone to pick with you. 409 00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:12,196 I have looked like a right tit with this walkie-talkie 410 00:16:12,296 --> 00:16:15,277 and clipboard all day and you have not took the piss. 411 00:16:15,377 --> 00:16:16,139 Are you ill? 412 00:16:16,239 --> 00:16:17,286 - I need to talk to you. 413 00:16:17,386 --> 00:16:19,661 - All right. What's up? 414 00:16:19,761 --> 00:16:21,678 - I'm going to Newquay. 415 00:16:22,805 --> 00:16:25,379 - What the hell? How long for? 416 00:16:25,479 --> 00:16:26,411 - Well, I dunno. 417 00:16:26,511 --> 00:16:28,826 I spoke to my mate, Pete. He said I can stay as long as I like. 418 00:16:28,826 --> 00:16:29,993 - Bloody hell, Kieran? 419 00:16:30,093 --> 00:16:31,016 - I need to get away. 420 00:16:31,116 --> 00:16:33,447 - Yeah, yeah, but running away. I mean, that won't change anything. 421 00:16:33,447 --> 00:16:36,227 - I dunno what else to do. 422 00:16:36,327 --> 00:16:38,120 - So that's it, then? 423 00:16:38,220 --> 00:16:39,550 You're leaving? 424 00:16:39,650 --> 00:16:42,985 I mean, do you care about anyone other than yourself? 425 00:16:43,085 --> 00:16:43,918 Like me? 426 00:16:45,619 --> 00:16:47,536 I don't want you to go. 427 00:16:49,969 --> 00:16:52,886 - I'm sorry, I've gotta to do this. 428 00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:57,432 - Thanks a lot, Kieran. 429 00:17:02,674 --> 00:17:03,771 - Salmon, cod, mackerel. 430 00:17:03,871 --> 00:17:06,005 Sole, sole, sole, sole, sole, sole, sole. 431 00:17:06,105 --> 00:17:08,338 Sole, sole, salmon, sole, sole, salmon. 432 00:17:08,438 --> 00:17:09,779 Monkfish, monkfish, monkfish. 433 00:17:09,879 --> 00:17:11,457 Sole, salmon, salmon, sole. 434 00:17:11,557 --> 00:17:12,640 Salmon, sole. 435 00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:16,870 Mackerel. 436 00:17:16,970 --> 00:17:19,741 - Right. Well, here we go. 437 00:17:19,841 --> 00:17:21,952 Now, the first thing we need to do 438 00:17:22,052 --> 00:17:23,806 when we're butchering a pig 439 00:17:23,906 --> 00:17:27,239 is to split the abdomen all the way down 440 00:17:28,292 --> 00:17:31,209 which allows us to remove the guts. 441 00:17:32,158 --> 00:17:36,325 You know what, I'm just going to get a bigger knife. 442 00:17:38,288 --> 00:17:41,538 So, we need to get a big enough section 443 00:17:43,577 --> 00:17:48,033 that we can remove the guts, without tainting the meat. 444 00:17:48,133 --> 00:17:49,348 Oh, there we go, yeah. 445 00:17:49,448 --> 00:17:50,948 Oh, God. It stinks. 446 00:17:52,803 --> 00:17:54,720 Let me just get inside. 447 00:17:55,713 --> 00:17:59,880 OK, now, what I've done there, is just caught the membrane. 448 00:18:04,352 --> 00:18:07,130 - Have I got to ask you if I can go home now? 449 00:18:07,230 --> 00:18:08,894 - I'm really not in the mood today, Lisa. 450 00:18:08,994 --> 00:18:10,579 - Oh, Katie, how did you get on today? 451 00:18:10,679 --> 00:18:11,648 - Yeah, alright. 452 00:18:11,748 --> 00:18:12,924 - Julie, she was a star. 453 00:18:13,024 --> 00:18:14,603 - [Both] Oh, shut up, Neville. 454 00:18:14,703 --> 00:18:16,442 - Well, I suppose there were no disasters 455 00:18:16,542 --> 00:18:18,592 but I'm still not convinced you've got the right attitude. 456 00:18:18,592 --> 00:18:20,788 - Yeah, her attitude's been dead rubbish, Julie. 457 00:18:20,888 --> 00:18:22,226 - Oh, just shut up! 458 00:18:22,326 --> 00:18:23,532 Shut up, all right? 459 00:18:23,632 --> 00:18:25,754 I don't care if you're a mate, I'm having a shit day, 460 00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:27,480 and I've nothing but grief from you 461 00:18:27,580 --> 00:18:30,280 and you're not speaking to me like that! All right? 462 00:18:30,380 --> 00:18:31,380 - All right. 463 00:18:32,346 --> 00:18:33,179 Soz. 464 00:18:38,513 --> 00:18:41,248 - Why did the man destroy a pig, mommy? 465 00:18:41,348 --> 00:18:42,317 - I don't know, darling. 466 00:18:42,417 --> 00:18:44,084 I really don't know. 467 00:18:47,342 --> 00:18:48,675 - You all right? 468 00:18:49,628 --> 00:18:51,544 - Well, that was a disaster. 469 00:18:51,644 --> 00:18:53,682 - Ah, disaster's harsh, Gav. 470 00:18:53,782 --> 00:18:55,366 Just didn't work out. 471 00:18:55,466 --> 00:18:57,510 In my book, that's a learning experience. 472 00:18:57,610 --> 00:18:59,429 - Oh, what did we learn? 473 00:18:59,529 --> 00:19:01,816 Not to destroy a pig in front of all the customers? 474 00:19:01,916 --> 00:19:03,540 I already knew that. 475 00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:06,326 - How could there so much bone in one pig? 476 00:19:06,426 --> 00:19:08,461 - Look, we tried something, 477 00:19:08,561 --> 00:19:11,211 it didn't work, we'll try something else. 478 00:19:11,311 --> 00:19:13,761 That's what Valco Better is all about. 479 00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:18,294 Right, catch you tomorrow, might do another brainstorming blitz. 480 00:19:18,394 --> 00:19:19,811 Catch you laters. 481 00:19:21,199 --> 00:19:22,988 - Don't forget your ideas bag. 482 00:19:23,088 --> 00:19:23,921 He's gone. 483 00:19:24,806 --> 00:19:27,624 - I'm sorry I made you throw up. 484 00:19:27,724 --> 00:19:30,410 - You ruined a perfectly good pig, Andrew. 485 00:19:30,510 --> 00:19:33,201 There wasn't even anything usable. 486 00:19:33,301 --> 00:19:36,384 - The eyes, I can still see the eyes. 487 00:19:41,511 --> 00:19:43,258 - Yeah, don't ask. 488 00:19:43,358 --> 00:19:46,589 - So, Anna got away OK, did she? 489 00:19:46,689 --> 00:19:48,478 - Oh, yes, yes, super. 490 00:19:48,578 --> 00:19:51,810 - She's very different to Barbara. 491 00:19:51,910 --> 00:19:54,271 Not at all the sort of woman I'd have put you with. 492 00:19:54,371 --> 00:19:56,733 - Oh, she makes me feel 10 years younger. 493 00:19:56,833 --> 00:19:59,078 - Yes, she's very Spanish. 494 00:19:59,178 --> 00:20:01,869 You know, Gavin, there's nothing wrong with a man 495 00:20:01,969 --> 00:20:03,222 sowing his wild oats but-- 496 00:20:03,322 --> 00:20:04,820 - Ah, Julie I just think you're about 497 00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:09,483 to cross the work personal life line so shall we just leave it at that? 498 00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:11,500 - Oh, I'm sorry, Gavin. 499 00:20:14,020 --> 00:20:16,264 - Have a good evening, Julie. 500 00:20:16,364 --> 00:20:17,197 - You too. 501 00:20:18,173 --> 00:20:19,590 Enjoy your steak. 502 00:20:24,206 --> 00:20:26,968 - It won't be the same without you. 503 00:20:27,068 --> 00:20:29,176 - Probably only be for a few months. 504 00:20:29,276 --> 00:20:30,994 - Will you write to me? 505 00:20:31,094 --> 00:20:32,677 - Write? I'll text. 506 00:20:33,676 --> 00:20:34,930 - Oh, I don't do texts. 507 00:20:35,030 --> 00:20:37,863 You never know who's reading them. 508 00:20:40,165 --> 00:20:42,037 I'll miss you, buggerlugs. 509 00:20:42,137 --> 00:20:44,720 - Oh, don't give me those eyes. 510 00:20:45,838 --> 00:20:48,171 - Come here. Come here, you. 511 00:20:52,744 --> 00:20:54,661 - Ah, mate, that hurts. 512 00:20:56,924 --> 00:20:59,445 - Sorry, got something in my eye. 513 00:20:59,545 --> 00:21:02,569 - Oh, mate, you're going to have me going. 514 00:21:02,669 --> 00:21:03,805 - Bit of pig bone. 515 00:21:03,905 --> 00:21:06,072 Look, right in the corner. 516 00:21:12,752 --> 00:21:14,817 - There's your receipt and your change. Thank you. 517 00:21:30,603 --> 00:21:33,270 (upbeat music)