1 00:00:02,880 --> 00:00:03,864 - Could you just stop that now? 2 00:00:03,864 --> 00:00:06,897 - (grunts) Aw, he keeps on movin' it. (grunts) 3 00:00:06,997 --> 00:00:09,512 - From booze to biscuits. - Red-hot deals. 4 00:00:09,612 --> 00:00:10,654 - Loads of two-for-ones. 5 00:00:10,754 --> 00:00:12,343 - Don't forget the Valco tick. 6 00:00:12,443 --> 00:00:14,263 - People always get it wrong, it's definitely that way. 7 00:00:14,263 --> 00:00:15,736 - Tick. 8 00:00:15,836 --> 00:00:16,885 - Tick. - And I'm not doing 9 00:00:16,885 --> 00:00:18,133 that tick thing, either. 10 00:00:18,233 --> 00:00:19,477 - Am I gettin' paid for this? 11 00:00:19,577 --> 00:00:21,663 (laughing) - Serves you right. 12 00:00:21,763 --> 00:00:24,185 - [All] Valco serves you right. 13 00:00:24,285 --> 00:00:27,365 (upbeat music) (shopping carts clash) 14 00:00:27,465 --> 00:00:30,428 - Please, we've not got much time, this is really important. 15 00:00:30,528 --> 00:00:33,486 - I know this is important, Daniel. Daddy says if I screw up one more time 16 00:00:33,586 --> 00:00:34,830 they'll make me poor. 17 00:00:34,930 --> 00:00:37,048 - There's nothing wrong with being poor. - Yeah. 18 00:00:37,148 --> 00:00:40,785 Me, poor, having to manage with just one house, 19 00:00:40,885 --> 00:00:44,060 a couple of cars, one single horse. 20 00:00:44,160 --> 00:00:45,707 - Yeah, that's still rich. 21 00:00:45,807 --> 00:00:48,365 - Oh my God, this is terrible. 22 00:00:48,465 --> 00:00:49,437 Right, test me. - Right. 23 00:00:49,537 --> 00:00:51,683 The store is divided into 12-- 24 00:00:51,783 --> 00:00:53,237 - Disciples. - Aisles! 25 00:00:53,337 --> 00:00:55,474 - I was close, though. 26 00:00:55,574 --> 00:00:56,407 Aisles. 27 00:00:58,239 --> 00:00:59,097 - What are you doin'? 28 00:00:59,197 --> 00:01:00,682 - Cheat notes, disciples. 29 00:01:00,782 --> 00:01:03,529 - No no no no, don't write disciples. 30 00:01:03,629 --> 00:01:06,462 - How are we doing? - Oh, brilliantly, look. 31 00:01:09,068 --> 00:01:09,996 - How bad is it? 32 00:01:10,096 --> 00:01:11,793 - In 20 minutes, the owner of Valco is coming in 33 00:01:11,793 --> 00:01:15,587 to see if we've shown his daughter how all aspects of a supermarket work. 34 00:01:15,687 --> 00:01:17,629 - Listen, if we can just get her to look like 35 00:01:17,729 --> 00:01:20,179 she knows the basics, then maybe he won't fire us. 36 00:01:20,279 --> 00:01:23,484 - Oh my God, guys, my fleece has a badge with my name on it. 37 00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:25,069 - Oh, screw it. 38 00:01:25,169 --> 00:01:28,418 - The head of Valco, here. - Where? 39 00:01:28,518 --> 00:01:30,430 - No, I mean he's coming in today. 40 00:01:30,530 --> 00:01:33,106 Finally, my big chance to impress. 41 00:01:33,206 --> 00:01:35,111 - Oh, d'you know what I find impressive? 42 00:01:35,211 --> 00:01:38,609 Impressions, me and my Alan saw a great one once 43 00:01:38,709 --> 00:01:41,373 at Pontoon's, he did Bruce Forsythe. 44 00:01:41,473 --> 00:01:43,660 Alan were in tears! (laughing) 45 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:46,401 - No, no, no, see I've seen the future, Margaret. 46 00:01:46,501 --> 00:01:48,772 I know exactly what supermarkets will look like 47 00:01:48,872 --> 00:01:50,999 and how we can be ahead of the curve. 48 00:01:51,099 --> 00:01:54,202 - Nice to see ya, nice to see ya. (laughing) 49 00:01:54,302 --> 00:01:56,307 I laugh just thinkin' about him. (laughing) 50 00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:57,949 - Me, it was the same with books. 51 00:01:58,049 --> 00:01:59,251 They all said I was mad. 52 00:01:59,351 --> 00:02:02,202 - Have you told Gavin that you can see into the future? 53 00:02:02,302 --> 00:02:04,103 - What, Gavin, no, I've tried, 54 00:02:04,203 --> 00:02:06,307 but it's too much for his little brain. 55 00:02:06,407 --> 00:02:09,289 I need to go straight to the head honcho with this. 56 00:02:09,389 --> 00:02:10,947 Someone with a bit of vision. 57 00:02:11,047 --> 00:02:12,954 (laughing) 58 00:02:13,054 --> 00:02:16,092 - Sorry, I'm thinking about Brucie again. 59 00:02:16,192 --> 00:02:20,359 Good games, good games. (laughing) 60 00:02:32,133 --> 00:02:33,324 - Gavin. - (gasps) Oh. 61 00:02:33,424 --> 00:02:36,482 Oh, Mr. O'Connor, I didn't see you there. 62 00:02:36,582 --> 00:02:38,939 - Enough talkin', where's my little girl, huh? 63 00:02:39,039 --> 00:02:41,437 I mean I wouldn't lie to you, Gavin, I would never lie to you. 64 00:02:41,437 --> 00:02:42,538 - Oh that's good to know. - That was a lie! 65 00:02:42,538 --> 00:02:45,377 I would lie to you, you should have spotted the lie! 66 00:02:45,477 --> 00:02:46,528 - Oh-- - Let's to cut the chase. 67 00:02:46,528 --> 00:02:48,654 All right, I trusted you to turn my daughter 68 00:02:48,754 --> 00:02:50,938 from a walkin' disaster into someone who can cut it 69 00:02:50,938 --> 00:02:52,350 in this world. 70 00:02:52,450 --> 00:02:54,461 This is her last chance, you know, Gavin. 71 00:02:54,561 --> 00:02:56,434 If she screws it up, she's dead to me. 72 00:02:56,534 --> 00:02:58,842 - Isn't that a bit extreme? - No more daddy's money. 73 00:02:58,942 --> 00:03:00,747 She's out of the will, she's out of the family vote, 74 00:03:00,747 --> 00:03:02,958 all's gone, just like her brother. 75 00:03:03,058 --> 00:03:05,432 - Didn't know Charlotte had a brother. - Exactly. 76 00:03:05,532 --> 00:03:08,572 So if you've messed this up, she's out. 77 00:03:08,672 --> 00:03:12,839 - I'd hate to think what you'd do to me. (chuckling) 78 00:03:13,954 --> 00:03:15,502 - [Lisa] This till's open. 79 00:03:15,602 --> 00:03:19,769 - I think you'd prefer this till, sir, that one's a bit... 80 00:03:20,737 --> 00:03:22,970 hygiene problems. - I wouldn't go there, 81 00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:24,320 to-may, she's a 82 00:03:25,912 --> 00:03:27,863 cow. - Well I'd rather be a cow 83 00:03:27,963 --> 00:03:28,956 than a whore! 84 00:03:29,056 --> 00:03:31,779 - Well for your information, I'm both, so there. 85 00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,806 - What? - Hang on, hang on. 86 00:03:33,906 --> 00:03:35,573 I meant, oh shut up! 87 00:03:36,823 --> 00:03:38,655 - Why don't you shut me up? 88 00:03:38,755 --> 00:03:42,672 If it's another fight you want, I'm right here! 89 00:03:46,077 --> 00:03:47,777 - I told you to wait two minutes before comin' in, 90 00:03:47,777 --> 00:03:49,388 not walk straight behind me. - Sorry. 91 00:03:49,488 --> 00:03:53,831 I couldn't help it, I was admiring the lovely view. 92 00:03:53,931 --> 00:03:56,519 - Don't try it, Neville, not here. - Mornin'. 93 00:03:56,619 --> 00:03:58,650 - Hiya, how you doin'? 94 00:03:58,750 --> 00:04:00,158 Good night last night, what were you up to? 95 00:04:00,158 --> 00:04:02,086 No, I'm not late, what? 96 00:04:02,186 --> 00:04:03,419 - Mornin'. 97 00:04:03,519 --> 00:04:05,885 (clattering) 98 00:04:05,985 --> 00:04:08,152 (panting) 99 00:04:10,376 --> 00:04:12,815 - [Rose] Why have you brought me here, Cauliflower? 100 00:04:12,915 --> 00:04:14,947 - [Colin] Let me just show you this, that's it. 101 00:04:15,047 --> 00:04:18,046 Just up here it is. - Oh, right. 102 00:04:18,146 --> 00:04:20,261 What's she doing in here? 103 00:04:20,361 --> 00:04:22,002 - Are you sure there's a KFC in here? 104 00:04:22,102 --> 00:04:24,503 I can't find it anywhere. 105 00:04:24,603 --> 00:04:27,003 - This is for your own good, girls. 106 00:04:27,103 --> 00:04:27,836 - [Lisa] What? 107 00:04:27,936 --> 00:04:29,103 Colin! - Colin! 108 00:04:29,981 --> 00:04:30,858 - Let us out! - Open up! 109 00:04:30,958 --> 00:04:33,815 - Why do we keep fresh produce at the front of the store? 110 00:04:33,915 --> 00:04:35,728 - Rabbits. - Rabbits? 111 00:04:35,828 --> 00:04:39,981 - Yes, when the rabbits come into the shop, 112 00:04:40,081 --> 00:04:41,829 they see the carrots, take them, 113 00:04:41,929 --> 00:04:43,545 and then they don't go eatin' other stuff 114 00:04:43,545 --> 00:04:46,164 in the rest of the shop. - (chuckling) Yes. 115 00:04:46,264 --> 00:04:48,443 I never thought of it like that before. 116 00:04:48,543 --> 00:04:51,043 And of course, there's that other thing, 117 00:04:51,143 --> 00:04:53,830 um, that you were saying to me earlier, remember? 118 00:04:53,930 --> 00:04:56,287 About how it's so the customer associates our store 119 00:04:56,387 --> 00:04:58,996 with freshness the minute they arrive. 120 00:04:59,096 --> 00:05:01,652 - Yeah, that too, but mainly rabbits. 121 00:05:01,752 --> 00:05:03,335 - Give me strength. 122 00:05:04,589 --> 00:05:07,407 - I can't find that sodding KFC anywhere. 123 00:05:07,507 --> 00:05:08,590 I'm starvin'. 124 00:05:15,067 --> 00:05:16,650 Can I have a crisp? 125 00:05:17,945 --> 00:05:20,528 - No. (scoffs) 126 00:05:21,545 --> 00:05:25,237 - I hope there's enough air in here. 127 00:05:25,337 --> 00:05:28,197 (Lisa farts) (Margaret groans) 128 00:05:28,297 --> 00:05:29,541 - Disgusting! 129 00:05:29,641 --> 00:05:31,274 - Yeah, I can't help it. 130 00:05:31,374 --> 00:05:35,483 Me stomach thought it was gettin' chicken. It's been tricked, it's angry. 131 00:05:35,583 --> 00:05:36,775 (exhales) 132 00:05:36,875 --> 00:05:41,480 (Lisa farts) (Margaret groans) 133 00:05:41,580 --> 00:05:44,706 - Mr. O'Connor I've seen the future and I can save your supermarket. 134 00:05:44,806 --> 00:05:47,469 - Oh, for goodness sake, Brian, we've discussed this before. 135 00:05:47,569 --> 00:05:50,319 You cannot see into the-- - Gavin! 136 00:05:51,907 --> 00:05:53,074 I've got this. 137 00:05:53,976 --> 00:05:56,144 Now let me get this straight. 138 00:05:56,244 --> 00:05:58,507 You think that you can stop me, Brendan O'Connor, 139 00:05:58,607 --> 00:06:01,005 and tell me what to do with my own company? 140 00:06:01,105 --> 00:06:03,746 - Yes, I know what tomorrow's supermarket will be 141 00:06:03,846 --> 00:06:05,515 and if you'll give me a minute of your time 142 00:06:05,515 --> 00:06:09,732 I can make sure that Valco stay ahead of the curve. 143 00:06:09,832 --> 00:06:12,773 - You've got some balls, do you know that? 144 00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:14,206 Big brass balls. 145 00:06:15,113 --> 00:06:17,449 - I am so sorry-- - Huge balls! 146 00:06:17,549 --> 00:06:19,507 Balls that you only read about in books! 147 00:06:19,607 --> 00:06:21,440 Books about big balls! 148 00:06:22,577 --> 00:06:24,306 And I love that. 149 00:06:24,406 --> 00:06:26,384 You tell it like it is, 150 00:06:26,484 --> 00:06:28,261 and I respect that. 151 00:06:28,361 --> 00:06:31,411 - Please, I'm just an ordinary guy with an amazing gift, 152 00:06:31,511 --> 00:06:33,723 a gift to see into the future itself. 153 00:06:33,823 --> 00:06:35,865 - Well let me tell you somethin', kid. 154 00:06:35,965 --> 00:06:38,155 This afternoon I'm going to give you two minutes 155 00:06:38,255 --> 00:06:40,088 to give me your pitch. 156 00:06:41,380 --> 00:06:42,213 Wow me. 157 00:06:43,611 --> 00:06:46,194 - Thank you, Mr. O'Connor, sir. 158 00:06:47,117 --> 00:06:48,812 - Right, come on, ladies. 159 00:06:48,912 --> 00:06:50,923 - Goodbye, Your Grace. 160 00:06:51,023 --> 00:06:53,523 - No need to curtsy, Margaret. 161 00:06:57,931 --> 00:06:58,838 - Boo! (exclaiming) 162 00:06:58,938 --> 00:07:00,108 - Alone at last. 163 00:07:00,208 --> 00:07:01,683 - (sighs) You're weird, Neville. 164 00:07:01,783 --> 00:07:03,951 - Just a little kiss, come on, I've really missed you. 165 00:07:04,051 --> 00:07:06,039 - No, no Neville, this isn't a relationship thing. 166 00:07:06,139 --> 00:07:07,319 It's just a bit of fun. 167 00:07:07,419 --> 00:07:09,100 - That's what Vanessa said at first. 168 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:10,819 - And I don't know how, but somehow, 169 00:07:10,919 --> 00:07:12,187 you've worn me down enough to sleep with ya. 170 00:07:12,187 --> 00:07:14,102 - Again, just what Vanessa says. 171 00:07:14,202 --> 00:07:15,596 - I'm in a low place right now. 172 00:07:15,696 --> 00:07:19,258 - Snout, her father, had literally just died. 173 00:07:19,358 --> 00:07:21,255 - What I'm trying to say is it's just a bit of fun 174 00:07:21,355 --> 00:07:23,195 outside work, but not here, okay? 175 00:07:23,295 --> 00:07:25,179 - Okay. - Right, well. 176 00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:26,398 - Typical of my luck. 177 00:07:26,498 --> 00:07:28,706 I manage to snare a beautiful woman, 178 00:07:28,806 --> 00:07:32,723 a 10 out of 10, and I have to keep it a secret. 179 00:07:36,023 --> 00:07:38,106 - Go on then. - Brilliant. 180 00:07:43,825 --> 00:07:45,615 (exclaiming) Gee, 181 00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:48,252 you see you are ticklish, Linda. 182 00:07:48,352 --> 00:07:50,582 (laughing) Hello, Brian. 183 00:07:50,682 --> 00:07:52,042 I didn't see you there. 184 00:07:52,142 --> 00:07:54,793 I was just seeing if Linda here is ticklish. 185 00:07:54,893 --> 00:07:56,473 (exclaiming) (laughing) 186 00:07:56,573 --> 00:07:58,080 - That's exactly what you're doing. 187 00:07:58,180 --> 00:07:59,195 - Whatever. 188 00:07:59,295 --> 00:08:01,314 - Are you ticklish, Brian? 189 00:08:01,414 --> 00:08:02,639 (exclaiming) 190 00:08:02,739 --> 00:08:04,778 - What are you doin'? (laughing) 191 00:08:04,878 --> 00:08:07,445 Stop it, no, no don't. (laughing) 192 00:08:07,545 --> 00:08:09,943 Stop, stop or I'm gonna... 193 00:08:10,043 --> 00:08:12,867 (laughing) (exclaiming) 194 00:08:12,967 --> 00:08:14,490 - And I said to him, I said, listen till I tell you, 195 00:08:14,490 --> 00:08:16,888 you speak to me like that again, Branson, 196 00:08:16,988 --> 00:08:19,068 and I will pull that little beard out of your face, 197 00:08:19,068 --> 00:08:20,600 and shove it up your ass. (telephone ringing) 198 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,913 (laughing) 199 00:08:23,013 --> 00:08:24,820 Baby. (laughing) 200 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:26,833 - I suppose you had to be there. 201 00:08:26,933 --> 00:08:27,937 - O'Connor. 202 00:08:28,037 --> 00:08:28,870 What? 203 00:08:30,269 --> 00:08:32,613 Wait a second, will you? Gavin, feed me. 204 00:08:34,367 --> 00:08:36,440 - I'm sorry? - Just feed me, will ya? 205 00:08:36,540 --> 00:08:39,139 Listen, you tell Ballantine if he thinks he can pull out 206 00:08:39,239 --> 00:08:41,352 at this stage, he another think comin'. 207 00:08:41,452 --> 00:08:42,702 Burger, burger. 208 00:08:43,671 --> 00:08:47,069 Not the whole thing, break it into pieces. 209 00:08:47,169 --> 00:08:48,466 - Sorry. - Listen, 210 00:08:48,566 --> 00:08:51,837 you tell Ballantine if he wants to pull out, that's fine. 211 00:08:51,937 --> 00:08:53,778 But tell him, I know his address, 212 00:08:53,878 --> 00:08:56,687 and I know where his kids go to school, too. 213 00:08:56,787 --> 00:08:58,719 - I hope we can keep this up till the afternoon. 214 00:08:58,719 --> 00:09:00,110 Otherwise I'll be poor. 215 00:09:00,210 --> 00:09:02,072 - I'm sure you'd manage. 216 00:09:02,172 --> 00:09:03,228 - Oh no, I don't know. 217 00:09:03,328 --> 00:09:06,358 I saw this documentary about this kid who was so poor, 218 00:09:06,458 --> 00:09:08,565 he couldn't afford to eat. 219 00:09:08,665 --> 00:09:10,707 And every time he asked for more gruel, 220 00:09:10,807 --> 00:09:12,396 they wouldn't give him any. 221 00:09:12,496 --> 00:09:14,361 So he had a to pick a pocket. 222 00:09:14,461 --> 00:09:15,957 Sometimes two. 223 00:09:16,057 --> 00:09:17,751 - Yeah, I think that's Oliver? 224 00:09:17,851 --> 00:09:19,966 - Yeah, that was him, did you see it too? 225 00:09:20,066 --> 00:09:21,602 - [Brendan] All right. 226 00:09:21,702 --> 00:09:23,202 Thanks a lot, Liz. 227 00:09:25,358 --> 00:09:26,876 - Should I stop? 228 00:09:26,976 --> 00:09:28,515 - No. 229 00:09:28,615 --> 00:09:30,993 I'm enjoying this, actually, fill me up. 230 00:09:31,093 --> 00:09:31,926 Burger. 231 00:09:35,616 --> 00:09:37,807 - [Neville] Do you mind if I join you gorgeous ladies? 232 00:09:37,907 --> 00:09:40,160 - If you want. - Oh I do so. 233 00:09:40,260 --> 00:09:41,093 Oh, I do. 234 00:09:41,962 --> 00:09:44,718 - What star sign are you, Neville? - Cancer. 235 00:09:44,818 --> 00:09:47,675 - With Jupiter rising, love is in the air. 236 00:09:47,775 --> 00:09:49,021 Doesn't sound right. 237 00:09:49,121 --> 00:09:51,341 - Oh, I don't know, sounds fairly accurate to me. 238 00:09:51,441 --> 00:09:54,020 What about Linda, what does her star sign say? 239 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:57,263 - Taurus, it might feel like you're at rock bottom, 240 00:09:57,363 --> 00:09:59,312 but at least the only way is up. 241 00:09:59,412 --> 00:10:01,454 The letter N is on the horizon. 242 00:10:01,554 --> 00:10:02,887 - [Neville] Hmm. 243 00:10:04,012 --> 00:10:05,477 - It's a load of rubbish anyway. 244 00:10:05,577 --> 00:10:08,093 - Oh, I'm not so sure, like the stars say: 245 00:10:08,193 --> 00:10:09,776 love is in the air. 246 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:20,515 - Oh, it were ever so fun. 247 00:10:20,615 --> 00:10:22,508 He really sounded just like him. 248 00:10:22,608 --> 00:10:26,775 What do-points big surprises. (laughing) 249 00:10:28,405 --> 00:10:29,322 - Margaret, 250 00:10:30,180 --> 00:10:32,987 the supermarket of the future. 251 00:10:33,087 --> 00:10:34,300 What do you think? 252 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,148 - It's just a pharmacy. 253 00:10:36,248 --> 00:10:37,081 - Exactly. 254 00:10:38,538 --> 00:10:40,558 - Hey, d'you know what it reminds me of? 255 00:10:40,658 --> 00:10:41,741 This counter. 256 00:10:43,039 --> 00:10:45,998 - Well yeah, it's a model of this counter. 257 00:10:46,098 --> 00:10:46,931 - Oh. 258 00:10:48,176 --> 00:10:50,009 But where's my banana? 259 00:10:51,284 --> 00:10:53,589 - Well it's the supermarket of the future. 260 00:10:53,689 --> 00:10:56,361 You'll have eaten your banana in the future. 261 00:10:56,461 --> 00:10:58,010 - Hmm. 262 00:10:58,110 --> 00:11:01,348 I've spoilt me surprise, I hadn't made me mind up. 263 00:11:01,448 --> 00:11:04,031 Now I know I'm going to eat it. 264 00:11:06,289 --> 00:11:09,781 - Well, that was a lovely lunch with two lovely ladies. 265 00:11:09,881 --> 00:11:12,280 And I shall be seeing you both very soon. 266 00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:14,550 (imitates cat purring) 267 00:11:14,650 --> 00:11:16,207 - [Sue] Oh my God, Neville fancies me. 268 00:11:16,307 --> 00:11:17,040 - What? 269 00:11:17,140 --> 00:11:18,166 - He was playing footsie with me all lunch. 270 00:11:18,166 --> 00:11:20,350 And all that walkin' me back here and puttin' his arm around me. 271 00:11:20,350 --> 00:11:21,842 Ooh, Neville. 272 00:11:21,942 --> 00:11:23,263 - Is it so bad if he does? 273 00:11:23,363 --> 00:11:24,416 He's nice. 274 00:11:24,516 --> 00:11:26,938 - Imagine how desperate you'd have to be to go out with him. 275 00:11:27,038 --> 00:11:31,252 Think of it, Linda, can you imagine? - Yes, I can imagine, thank you. 276 00:11:31,352 --> 00:11:34,245 - And, uh, this is the kiosk. 277 00:11:34,345 --> 00:11:36,227 - There's a lot of age-restricted stuff here. 278 00:11:36,327 --> 00:11:37,342 Question: 279 00:11:37,442 --> 00:11:39,752 Someone comes to you and they want to buy a bottle of vodka. 280 00:11:39,752 --> 00:11:42,329 They look under 18; what do you do? 281 00:11:42,429 --> 00:11:43,568 - Well, 282 00:11:43,668 --> 00:11:45,085 I would tell them 283 00:11:45,987 --> 00:11:49,541 to pace themselves, because I remember when I was 17 284 00:11:49,641 --> 00:11:51,346 I drank a whole bottle of vodka 285 00:11:51,446 --> 00:11:53,664 at Georgie Thomas's brother's nightclub opening, 286 00:11:53,764 --> 00:11:57,825 and, oh my God, Daddy, I was sick everywhere, I was 287 00:11:57,925 --> 00:11:59,386 (imitates vomiting) (telephone ringing) 288 00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:01,867 - Sorry, Charlotte, has your phone just beeped? 289 00:12:01,967 --> 00:12:05,049 - Oh yeah, it has, how weird. 290 00:12:05,149 --> 00:12:07,198 Oh, it's a wrong number. 291 00:12:07,298 --> 00:12:09,381 But on an unrelated note, 292 00:12:11,357 --> 00:12:14,627 Valco has a strict think-25 policy. 293 00:12:14,727 --> 00:12:18,576 So I would have to ask them for a valid ID 294 00:12:18,676 --> 00:12:20,009 as proof of age. 295 00:12:21,847 --> 00:12:23,496 - Very good. 296 00:12:23,596 --> 00:12:24,598 Right. 297 00:12:24,698 --> 00:12:25,918 I need a slash. 298 00:12:26,018 --> 00:12:26,851 Where? 299 00:12:30,407 --> 00:12:32,358 (telephone ringing) 300 00:12:32,458 --> 00:12:33,708 O'Connor, what? 301 00:12:35,578 --> 00:12:37,307 Hang on a second. 302 00:12:37,407 --> 00:12:38,878 Gavin. 303 00:12:38,978 --> 00:12:41,561 I'm gonna need your help again. 304 00:12:45,536 --> 00:12:47,566 - Typical crap plan of his. 305 00:12:47,666 --> 00:12:48,845 That's the problem with Colin. 306 00:12:48,845 --> 00:12:51,316 The only brain he's got is hanging between his legs. 307 00:12:51,416 --> 00:12:53,254 - (chuckling) Well that's nothing new. 308 00:12:53,354 --> 00:12:54,945 He's always thought with his winky. 309 00:12:55,045 --> 00:12:57,425 Even when he was a toddler, he'd be watchin' Playschool, 310 00:12:57,525 --> 00:13:00,583 looking at Jemima and rubbing himself against the sofa. 311 00:13:00,683 --> 00:13:02,766 - He still does that when Holly Oaks is on. 312 00:13:02,866 --> 00:13:05,326 - (laughing) No! - (laughing) Yeah. 313 00:13:05,426 --> 00:13:07,676 (laughing) 314 00:13:13,698 --> 00:13:15,348 Fancy a crisp? 315 00:13:15,448 --> 00:13:16,281 - Yeah. 316 00:13:21,138 --> 00:13:23,736 - You know, you're actually a lot like me, aren't you? 317 00:13:23,836 --> 00:13:25,457 - Am I? - You say what's on your mind. 318 00:13:25,557 --> 00:13:26,508 I like that. 319 00:13:26,608 --> 00:13:30,228 - Yeah, well, you're not so bad yourself. 320 00:13:30,328 --> 00:13:34,336 - Why don't we team up and teach him a thing or two, eh? 321 00:13:34,436 --> 00:13:36,817 - Oh, nice one, Rose. 322 00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:38,926 - Call me Nan. (laughing) 323 00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:40,526 - Oh, cheers, Nan. 324 00:13:41,446 --> 00:13:43,097 - Oi, don't finish them. 325 00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:44,197 - All right. 326 00:13:55,928 --> 00:13:57,886 - Has he gone? - Yeah. 327 00:13:57,986 --> 00:13:59,974 - Right, I found a Toffee Crisp down there. 328 00:14:00,074 --> 00:14:02,474 D'you want half? - Yeah, go on then. 329 00:14:02,574 --> 00:14:04,199 (Brendan ranting) 330 00:14:04,299 --> 00:14:07,216 - [Brian] He's coming, he's coming. 331 00:14:08,218 --> 00:14:11,358 - All right, kid, you've got two minutes. 332 00:14:11,458 --> 00:14:14,217 - The supermarket of the future. 333 00:14:14,317 --> 00:14:16,801 Now if science has taught us anything, 334 00:14:16,901 --> 00:14:19,550 it's that food will soon be a thing of the past. 335 00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:22,721 Food as we know it won't exist. 336 00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:26,483 Everything that we eat will soon be in pill form. 337 00:14:26,583 --> 00:14:29,441 Not just food, sun cream, shampoo, magazines, 338 00:14:29,541 --> 00:14:31,020 they'll all be in pills. 339 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:35,121 Ergo, tomorrow's supermarket will be just 340 00:14:35,221 --> 00:14:36,054 a giant 341 00:14:37,071 --> 00:14:38,073 pharmacy. 342 00:14:38,173 --> 00:14:39,006 - Ta da! 343 00:14:43,653 --> 00:14:44,486 - Is uh, 344 00:14:45,624 --> 00:14:47,014 that it? 345 00:14:47,114 --> 00:14:48,445 - No, no. - Ah. 346 00:14:48,545 --> 00:14:49,378 - No. 347 00:14:50,810 --> 00:14:53,193 Let me show you how it'll work, you see. 348 00:14:53,293 --> 00:14:54,876 A customer comes in 349 00:14:56,752 --> 00:14:59,020 up to the pharmacist and says, 350 00:14:59,120 --> 00:15:02,670 "Good morning, I would like a roast dinner 351 00:15:02,770 --> 00:15:05,641 "and some batteries and a loaf of bread." 352 00:15:05,741 --> 00:15:07,012 Oh, certainly Madam. 353 00:15:07,112 --> 00:15:08,590 Here's three pills. 354 00:15:08,690 --> 00:15:10,372 - Sh sh sh sh sh. 355 00:15:10,472 --> 00:15:11,305 Sh sh sh. 356 00:15:12,853 --> 00:15:15,103 Is this meant to be a joke? 357 00:15:17,141 --> 00:15:18,252 - No. 358 00:15:18,352 --> 00:15:20,841 - Now, because if it's serious, 359 00:15:20,941 --> 00:15:23,121 someone's going to get fired. 360 00:15:23,221 --> 00:15:24,304 Or destroyed! 361 00:15:28,642 --> 00:15:30,993 - Course it's a joke. 362 00:15:31,093 --> 00:15:32,532 (laughing) 363 00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:34,604 Look, it's a banana. (laughing) 364 00:15:34,704 --> 00:15:37,013 It's just a big laugh. 365 00:15:37,113 --> 00:15:39,363 (laughing) 366 00:15:41,802 --> 00:15:45,139 - I love it, I love it, the balls on you! 367 00:15:45,239 --> 00:15:46,989 Keep talkin', banana. 368 00:15:48,344 --> 00:15:51,594 (panting and groaning) 369 00:15:56,872 --> 00:16:00,235 - Right, now I know you're probably angry, but I did this so youse would make up. 370 00:16:00,335 --> 00:16:02,534 So please, please, don't kill me. 371 00:16:02,634 --> 00:16:04,404 - Don't be so silly, Colin. 372 00:16:04,504 --> 00:16:07,044 We had a great time in there. 373 00:16:07,144 --> 00:16:07,877 - Really? 374 00:16:07,977 --> 00:16:09,702 - Yeah, we're bessie mates now. 375 00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:13,073 Oh, I'm stuffed though, I couldn't even finish that chicken. 376 00:16:13,173 --> 00:16:15,226 - There isn't any chicken in there. - Yeah. 377 00:16:15,326 --> 00:16:18,522 On top of that delivery of dirty magazine Sambucca. 378 00:16:18,622 --> 00:16:19,789 - What? - Yeah. 379 00:16:22,136 --> 00:16:23,705 - Can't see any, Lizzie, show us in here. 380 00:16:23,805 --> 00:16:24,538 - [Lisa] Yeah. 381 00:16:24,638 --> 00:16:25,905 - It's for your own good, Colin. 382 00:16:26,005 --> 00:16:26,926 (pounding) - Lisa! 383 00:16:27,026 --> 00:16:29,406 Lisa, I can't see these magazines, mate. 384 00:16:29,506 --> 00:16:30,805 - All right, loves. 385 00:16:30,905 --> 00:16:32,758 Is this the van for Middlesbury? 386 00:16:32,858 --> 00:16:34,006 (laughing) 387 00:16:34,106 --> 00:16:35,446 - [Both] Yes. 388 00:16:35,546 --> 00:16:37,838 (laughing) 389 00:16:37,938 --> 00:16:39,037 - Oh, Mr. O'Connor, now before-- 390 00:16:39,037 --> 00:16:42,718 - I wanna talk to you about what I saw out there today. 391 00:16:42,818 --> 00:16:45,188 Now I gave you my only daughter. 392 00:16:45,288 --> 00:16:48,158 Don't ever interrupt me, Gavin, ever! 393 00:16:48,258 --> 00:16:51,980 I trusted you to make something of my little girl. 394 00:16:52,080 --> 00:16:53,080 And you did. 395 00:16:54,398 --> 00:16:56,648 What a massive improvement. 396 00:16:57,848 --> 00:16:59,860 - You did see her out there today, didn't you? 397 00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:01,620 - Half a million euro I have spent 398 00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:03,478 to spend her to the best schools in Europe, 399 00:17:03,478 --> 00:17:04,568 and she learned nothin'. 400 00:17:04,568 --> 00:17:07,009 Two months with you and she's like a machine. 401 00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:09,109 - Well we did work on a very rigorous training regime. 402 00:17:09,109 --> 00:17:11,889 - I mean she knows how the whole supermarket works. 403 00:17:11,989 --> 00:17:13,829 That's not like the old Charlie. (chuckling) 404 00:17:13,829 --> 00:17:16,681 She couldn't go two minutes without settin' somethin' on fire, hmm. 405 00:17:16,781 --> 00:17:18,260 - We have a problem. - Not a good time. 406 00:17:18,360 --> 00:17:19,526 - Now I don't know what you did, 407 00:17:19,526 --> 00:17:21,658 but a huge congratulations to you and your team, 408 00:17:21,658 --> 00:17:23,668 and let me tell you this, Gavin. 409 00:17:23,768 --> 00:17:26,390 There is going to be a reasonably big bonus 410 00:17:26,490 --> 00:17:27,980 on its way to you this Christmas. 411 00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:31,368 - Oh, I'm so glad. (chuckling) 412 00:17:31,468 --> 00:17:33,180 I suppose you can call of the hit men now. 413 00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:34,580 (laughing) 414 00:17:34,680 --> 00:17:39,078 - What a good point, call of the hit men. (laughing) 415 00:17:39,178 --> 00:17:42,077 Anderson, yeah, stand down, it's over. 416 00:17:42,177 --> 00:17:44,344 No no, repeat, stand down. 417 00:17:47,371 --> 00:17:51,233 ♫ Beautiful girl - Right, this can't go on. 418 00:17:51,333 --> 00:17:53,102 ♫ My beautiful girl 419 00:17:53,202 --> 00:17:55,671 - It's not gonna happen, Neville, I'm a married woman. 420 00:17:55,771 --> 00:17:57,654 I'm flattered, but it wouldn't work. 421 00:17:57,754 --> 00:17:58,587 Sorry. 422 00:18:01,282 --> 00:18:02,232 - What was that about? 423 00:18:02,332 --> 00:18:04,374 - You, you idiot, playin' with her at lunch. 424 00:18:04,474 --> 00:18:05,564 - I thought it was you. 425 00:18:05,664 --> 00:18:07,814 - This is why I said it can't happen at work. 426 00:18:07,914 --> 00:18:09,744 If Sue put two and two together and came up with four, 427 00:18:09,744 --> 00:18:11,044 everyone would know by now. 428 00:18:11,144 --> 00:18:14,153 - Well I just-- - Neville, not at work. 429 00:18:14,253 --> 00:18:16,604 No huggin', no comin' up to see me, 430 00:18:16,704 --> 00:18:18,484 no footsie, understood? 431 00:18:18,584 --> 00:18:20,073 - Okay, fine. 432 00:18:20,173 --> 00:18:23,272 From now on I shall be the soul of discretion. 433 00:18:23,372 --> 00:18:25,455 It'll be our sexy secret. 434 00:18:26,692 --> 00:18:30,710 No one here need ever know that you and I, Linda, 435 00:18:30,810 --> 00:18:35,092 are regularly making love (speaks faintly). 436 00:18:35,192 --> 00:18:36,422 - If you've quite finished 437 00:18:36,522 --> 00:18:39,161 with your pornographic announcement, Neville-- 438 00:18:39,261 --> 00:18:39,994 - My what? 439 00:18:40,094 --> 00:18:43,521 - Broadcasting your sexual exploits to the whole store 440 00:18:43,621 --> 00:18:45,572 is a very serious offence. 441 00:18:45,672 --> 00:18:46,712 - [Linda] Oh dear God. 442 00:18:46,812 --> 00:18:48,862 - The balls on this one, ha! 443 00:18:48,962 --> 00:18:52,009 Where do you find 'em, Gavin? 444 00:18:52,109 --> 00:18:53,801 - Linda. (Brendan laughing) 445 00:18:53,901 --> 00:18:55,123 - [Linda] Don't! 446 00:18:55,223 --> 00:18:57,974 - Right, well that's me done, Gav. 447 00:18:58,074 --> 00:19:00,157 You run a good ship here. 448 00:19:02,304 --> 00:19:03,894 I'm impressed. 449 00:19:03,994 --> 00:19:06,684 - All right, is that a lie? - No. 450 00:19:06,784 --> 00:19:07,673 Well that was. 451 00:19:07,773 --> 00:19:08,854 This one isn't though. 452 00:19:08,954 --> 00:19:11,345 Bye. (claps Gavin's back) 453 00:19:11,445 --> 00:19:12,934 Great balls, son. 454 00:19:13,034 --> 00:19:16,367 - Oh. (Neville mutters) 455 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:20,836 - We did it! 456 00:19:20,936 --> 00:19:23,257 - No you did it, you saved my job, Charlie. 457 00:19:23,357 --> 00:19:24,116 - Yay! 458 00:19:24,216 --> 00:19:26,061 And I get to keep my horses. (Daniel groans happily) 459 00:19:26,061 --> 00:19:27,478 - You're amazin'. 460 00:19:28,906 --> 00:19:30,152 Oh, I mean, 461 00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:34,002 you did amazin', um, and you've, yeah, you... 462 00:19:34,956 --> 00:19:36,398 You know what I mean. 463 00:19:36,498 --> 00:19:40,081 - Yeah, yeah, of course, I mean, obviously. 464 00:19:41,897 --> 00:19:43,863 Awkward silence. - Mm. 465 00:19:43,963 --> 00:19:44,928 - Oh, sorry, wasn't supposed to say that bit 466 00:19:44,928 --> 00:19:46,826 outside of my head. Daddy was really impressed. 467 00:19:46,826 --> 00:19:48,178 - Well Daddy should be impressed. 468 00:19:48,178 --> 00:19:50,618 I reckon if you stick at it and keep puttin' the effort in, 469 00:19:50,618 --> 00:19:52,509 who knows, one day you might even be doin' my job. 470 00:19:52,509 --> 00:19:53,268 Maybe Gavin's. 471 00:19:53,368 --> 00:19:54,429 - Oh no, he was really impressed. 472 00:19:54,429 --> 00:19:56,080 He wants me to take over and run the company. 473 00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:57,148 - (laughing) What? 474 00:19:57,248 --> 00:19:58,768 - (laughing) I know, it's awesome, isn't it? 475 00:19:58,768 --> 00:19:59,829 Fizzy worm? - Boy, (laughing) 476 00:19:59,829 --> 00:20:01,986 in charge, you, runnin' the whole company? 477 00:20:02,086 --> 00:20:04,430 All Valco, all of it? - Yes. 478 00:20:04,530 --> 00:20:07,150 Is it so hard to believe I can run a huge retail chain? 479 00:20:07,250 --> 00:20:08,418 (laughing) 480 00:20:08,518 --> 00:20:10,678 - Was he laughin' a lot when he said it? 481 00:20:10,778 --> 00:20:12,308 - No. (sarcastically laughing) 482 00:20:12,408 --> 00:20:14,658 (laughing) 483 00:20:19,269 --> 00:20:21,769 (Brian sighs) 484 00:20:25,858 --> 00:20:27,481 - Are you all right, Brian? 485 00:20:27,581 --> 00:20:31,371 - Yes, Marge, I just can't believe I blew my big chance. 486 00:20:31,471 --> 00:20:33,662 - Well I think you were wonderful. 487 00:20:33,762 --> 00:20:35,321 - Do ya? - Yeah. 488 00:20:35,421 --> 00:20:36,950 So what happens next? 489 00:20:37,050 --> 00:20:37,851 - Eh? 490 00:20:37,951 --> 00:20:39,622 - Well, the puppet show. 491 00:20:39,722 --> 00:20:41,041 You know, it was so exciting, 492 00:20:41,141 --> 00:20:43,993 I can't wait to see what happens. (chuckling) 493 00:20:44,093 --> 00:20:45,224 - Well I can show you. 494 00:20:45,324 --> 00:20:46,407 - Yeah, yeah. 495 00:20:48,674 --> 00:20:50,425 - Now, where were we? 496 00:20:50,525 --> 00:20:52,833 Oh yes, there you go Madame. 497 00:20:52,933 --> 00:20:55,673 "Oh, I need two pills of petrol, please." 498 00:20:55,773 --> 00:21:00,273 Certainly, Mrs. Banana, I'll just have to go in the back. 499 00:21:00,373 --> 00:21:01,953 Would there be anything else? 500 00:21:02,053 --> 00:21:03,593 - Bananas, two bananas. 501 00:21:03,693 --> 00:21:05,625 - Well that'd be cannibalism. - Oh. 502 00:21:05,725 --> 00:21:08,035 - I couldn't believe it. - I know. (laughing) 503 00:21:08,135 --> 00:21:09,955 I can't believe he did that. 504 00:21:10,055 --> 00:21:12,168 - Well, you like to talk, don't you? 505 00:21:12,268 --> 00:21:13,171 - Right-o. 506 00:21:13,271 --> 00:21:15,661 (Lisa and Rose laughing) 507 00:21:15,761 --> 00:21:18,511 (downbeat music) 508 00:21:23,023 --> 00:21:25,112 - [Charlotte] You're gettin' a promotion, 509 00:21:25,212 --> 00:21:26,601 you are gettin' a promotion, you I wanna talk about, 510 00:21:26,601 --> 00:21:30,147 you're gettin' a promotion. We're all gettin' promotions. 511 00:21:31,860 --> 00:21:33,431 (laughing) 512 00:21:33,531 --> 00:21:37,698 (upbeat music) (cash register ticking) 513 00:22:01,761 --> 00:22:03,112 (axe thuds) 514 00:22:03,212 --> 00:22:05,139 (block thuds) (man grunts) 515 00:22:05,239 --> 00:22:08,156 (electronic music)