1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:57,411 Ladies and gentlemen... 3 00:02:57,786 --> 00:03:01,552 ...you are about to witness the most spectacular feat... 4 00:03:01,923 --> 00:03:06,417 ...ever attempted by the greatest daredevil in the world. 5 00:03:06,595 --> 00:03:08,790 The Great Leslie. 6 00:03:20,375 --> 00:03:24,869 He will be strapped in a straitjacket before your very eyes... 7 00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:27,339 ...and lifted up into the clouds... 8 00:03:27,415 --> 00:03:31,749 ...where eagles soar and no sparrow dares to venture. 9 00:05:06,214 --> 00:05:08,546 Hey, bull's-eye. 10 00:05:14,489 --> 00:05:16,480 There's a hole in the balloon. 11 00:05:38,847 --> 00:05:41,179 - He'll never make it. - He'll never make it. 12 00:06:10,612 --> 00:06:12,603 - A parachute. - A parachute. 13 00:06:16,151 --> 00:06:17,482 A parachute! 14 00:06:18,153 --> 00:06:19,711 A parachute! 15 00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:20,952 What? 16 00:06:32,133 --> 00:06:36,035 Ladies and gentlemen, you are about to witness a feat... 17 00:06:36,237 --> 00:06:40,401 ...so dangerous that only one man would dare attempt it. 18 00:06:40,975 --> 00:06:44,638 The Magnificent Professor Fate. 19 00:06:54,622 --> 00:06:56,055 Attach the hooks. 20 00:06:56,124 --> 00:07:00,060 The professor will defy death as his assistant... 21 00:07:00,662 --> 00:07:03,995 ...swoops down from the sky, snares the professor... 22 00:07:04,566 --> 00:07:08,263 ...on the ground and lifts him into the air. 23 00:07:11,806 --> 00:07:13,137 Contact. 24 00:07:14,175 --> 00:07:15,836 Switch on. 25 00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:30,210 Up, Max! Bring it up! 26 00:08:30,818 --> 00:08:31,978 Coming up. 27 00:08:34,856 --> 00:08:38,189 Max, up, you idiot! Up! 28 00:08:39,193 --> 00:08:40,592 She's up! 29 00:08:44,732 --> 00:08:47,326 Up, you idiot, up! 30 00:08:47,535 --> 00:08:49,002 Too much weight. 31 00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:21,762 I'd like to see The Great Leslie try that one. 32 00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:39,351 After today you will have broken every existing speed record. 33 00:09:39,420 --> 00:09:41,149 What are your future plans? 34 00:09:41,222 --> 00:09:45,556 That depends on my success today. Gentlemen, will you excuse me please? 35 00:09:55,803 --> 00:09:59,204 Be careful, you idiot, you'll blow us both to kingdom come. 36 00:10:12,286 --> 00:10:14,720 He's getting in the boat. 37 00:10:43,518 --> 00:10:46,146 - You sure you tested the mechanism? - It can't miss. 38 00:10:46,220 --> 00:10:50,680 All you have to do is throw this switch, it homes in on the loudest engine noise. 39 00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:53,554 You see, it's picked up Leslie's boat! 40 00:10:57,565 --> 00:10:58,657 Farewell, Leslie. 41 00:10:59,834 --> 00:11:00,858 Away. 42 00:12:10,404 --> 00:12:11,371 Golly! 43 00:12:11,539 --> 00:12:13,268 Look at the pretty face on that... 44 00:12:13,341 --> 00:12:15,002 Get away from there. 45 00:12:28,890 --> 00:12:33,224 I intend to cover the measured mile in approximately twelve seconds. 46 00:12:47,909 --> 00:12:49,809 Activate the rockets. 47 00:13:16,070 --> 00:13:17,662 One hundred and fifty! 48 00:13:20,274 --> 00:13:21,866 Two hundred and fifty! 49 00:13:21,976 --> 00:13:24,376 - I'll go down in history! - Three hundred. 50 00:13:24,612 --> 00:13:26,842 They'll erect a monument to me! 51 00:13:31,219 --> 00:13:33,016 I've done it! 52 00:13:36,657 --> 00:13:38,648 - Professor? Professor? - What? 53 00:14:29,944 --> 00:14:33,903 Well, there's another one Leslie can try on for size. 54 00:14:36,851 --> 00:14:38,148 Gentlemen. 55 00:14:39,387 --> 00:14:42,845 I've requested this meeting in order to make you a proposition. 56 00:14:43,190 --> 00:14:48,492 In my opinion your company manufactures the finest automobile in the world. 57 00:14:49,363 --> 00:14:54,767 The automobile represents progress, in the most profound sense of the word. 58 00:14:54,869 --> 00:14:58,862 The ultimate example of American ingenuity and enterprise. 59 00:15:00,608 --> 00:15:04,942 This great nation cannot take a back seat to competitors like Daimler... 60 00:15:05,146 --> 00:15:09,310 ...Mercedes, Napier, Rolls-Royce, Dietrich or Panhard. 61 00:15:09,917 --> 00:15:15,150 Gentlemen, I propose to prove that the American automobile... 62 00:15:15,556 --> 00:15:19,458 ...your automobile, is without peers. 63 00:15:20,895 --> 00:15:24,626 And just how do you propose to prove that, sir? 64 00:15:25,333 --> 00:15:26,664 A race. 65 00:15:27,401 --> 00:15:30,063 Really, sir, you surprise me. 66 00:15:30,438 --> 00:15:34,135 Automobile races are becoming most commonplace. 67 00:15:34,608 --> 00:15:38,169 I mean, a long race. A very long race. 68 00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:40,978 Buffalo to Albany? It's been done. 69 00:15:41,349 --> 00:15:43,647 Chicago to Cleveland? That's been done. 70 00:15:46,387 --> 00:15:47,513 New York... 71 00:15:54,261 --> 00:15:55,421 ...to Paris? 72 00:15:58,265 --> 00:16:02,201 You must build an automobile to the most precise specifications. 73 00:16:06,407 --> 00:16:08,068 Absolutely no! 74 00:16:08,442 --> 00:16:12,105 For a company of this repute, a great company the likes of this one... 75 00:16:12,513 --> 00:16:17,177 ...entrusting its entire automobile future to a man like Leslie, it's disreputable. 76 00:16:17,718 --> 00:16:22,052 A cheap carnival performer, a fraud, a trickster. 77 00:16:24,592 --> 00:16:27,925 Help! Don't! A madman! 78 00:16:27,995 --> 00:16:30,225 I apologize. I thought you were someone else. 79 00:16:30,297 --> 00:16:32,424 Pulling it out by the roots. I warned you. 80 00:16:32,500 --> 00:16:36,596 The madman. Did you see him trying to pull my beard out by the roots? 81 00:16:44,545 --> 00:16:48,538 Leslie will lose! Your automobile will lose! I will win! 82 00:16:50,284 --> 00:16:51,615 He jumped! 83 00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:57,384 I shall build the greatest automobile in the world and I shall win! 84 00:16:59,293 --> 00:17:01,090 Okay, Professor. 85 00:17:01,462 --> 00:17:05,728 This time it will not be Leslie. It will be I, Professor Fate! 86 00:17:06,133 --> 00:17:08,465 Fate the Magnificent! 87 00:18:21,208 --> 00:18:25,406 And it is with no little pride that the Webber Motor Car Company... 88 00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:29,476 ...unveils its latest and greatest achievement. 89 00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:33,545 Gentlemen, behold the motor car of the future! 90 00:18:37,258 --> 00:18:38,850 Holy cow! 91 00:18:48,202 --> 00:18:50,500 Holy Toledo, look at that car! 92 00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:53,162 Yes, it's quite a car. 93 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:09,887 - I never saw a car like that in my life. - You never will again either. 94 00:19:09,957 --> 00:19:11,891 Give me the bomb. 95 00:19:16,597 --> 00:19:18,030 Professor, be careful. 96 00:19:18,098 --> 00:19:21,192 After you activate the mechanism, you only got ten seconds. 97 00:19:21,268 --> 00:19:24,066 I know that. Give me the cord. 98 00:19:36,784 --> 00:19:41,448 We have taken the liberty of naming it after the man who inspired its creation. 99 00:19:42,423 --> 00:19:44,914 - The Leslie Special. - I'm deeply honored. 100 00:20:42,883 --> 00:20:44,441 What took you so long? 101 00:20:44,518 --> 00:20:48,852 I had to go to the Rolls-Royce agency. I had to steal a spare magneto. 102 00:20:51,959 --> 00:20:53,187 It's ready. 103 00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:55,951 Yes, it's ready. 104 00:20:59,867 --> 00:21:02,267 There has never been anything like this. 105 00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:05,461 - Professor, your greatest creation. - The work of genius. 106 00:21:05,539 --> 00:21:08,633 The finest parts from the greatest automobiles in the world. 107 00:21:08,709 --> 00:21:10,404 The Hannibal Twin 8. 108 00:21:11,045 --> 00:21:15,243 When the blizzards and snow storms come, we will continue on just as planned. 109 00:21:15,315 --> 00:21:17,340 Push the button, Max. 110 00:21:23,157 --> 00:21:26,024 When the rains come, and when the snow melts... 111 00:21:26,093 --> 00:21:29,358 ...we shall continue to rise above it. 112 00:21:29,430 --> 00:21:31,364 Push the button, Max! 113 00:21:42,076 --> 00:21:44,374 Nature will chase us, we will beat her. 114 00:21:44,511 --> 00:21:47,446 And brigands, thieves, cutthroats of all nations may hound us. 115 00:21:47,514 --> 00:21:52,349 But we are ready for them. We will blast them to kingdom come! 116 00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:57,584 We can melt, we can blast. We can rise above! We are invincible! 117 00:21:57,858 --> 00:21:59,416 Take us down. 118 00:22:00,127 --> 00:22:01,822 Push the button, Max. 119 00:22:15,075 --> 00:22:16,064 Yes. 120 00:22:21,715 --> 00:22:23,876 - Mr. Goodbody. - What is it, Frisbee? 121 00:22:23,951 --> 00:22:26,249 - You have to come. - What's the matter? 122 00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:28,220 Well, it's a young lady, sir. 123 00:22:28,388 --> 00:22:31,687 - What about the young lady? - She's handcuffed herself to the door. 124 00:22:32,793 --> 00:22:35,921 - Handcuffed herself to the door? - Of the men's room. 125 00:22:36,363 --> 00:22:37,557 What? 126 00:22:47,841 --> 00:22:48,500 Gentleman! 127 00:22:48,575 --> 00:22:51,908 Return to your assignments. This is a newspaper office. 128 00:22:51,979 --> 00:22:54,607 There will be no lollygagging in this hallway. 129 00:22:54,848 --> 00:22:57,476 There will be no lollygagging in this hallway. 130 00:22:58,585 --> 00:23:00,416 Now, young lady, who are you? 131 00:23:00,487 --> 00:23:02,455 I am a female past the age of consent. 132 00:23:02,523 --> 00:23:05,287 I'm the first woman to edit the newspaper at my college. 133 00:23:05,359 --> 00:23:10,592 I'll remain handcuffed until I'm the first female reporter of The New York Sentinel. 134 00:23:10,664 --> 00:23:13,690 Over my dead body. Unlock those handcuffs and get out. 135 00:23:13,801 --> 00:23:16,429 I will unlock the handcuffs when you give me the job. 136 00:23:16,503 --> 00:23:17,231 Never! 137 00:23:17,638 --> 00:23:18,696 - Never? - Never. 138 00:23:19,439 --> 00:23:24,103 But, sir, if she remains here, handcuffed to the men's room. 139 00:23:26,446 --> 00:23:29,142 You men may use the washroom on the next floor. 140 00:23:29,950 --> 00:23:33,716 - They can't keep running upstairs forever. - They can until you get hungry. 141 00:23:34,288 --> 00:23:36,586 That would make a story for your competition. 142 00:23:36,657 --> 00:23:40,252 Woman starves to death in the men's room of The New York Sentinel. 143 00:23:40,894 --> 00:23:44,091 - You wouldn't dare. - I would dare anything for women's rights. 144 00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:53,937 - Give me an assignment. If I fail, fire me. - You're fired. 145 00:23:54,708 --> 00:23:57,939 Frisbee, post a bulletin. Suffragettes are not permitted. 146 00:23:58,212 --> 00:24:01,739 - Let me cover the great race. - It's covered by experienced reporters. 147 00:24:01,815 --> 00:24:05,080 No, I mean really cover it. From start to finish, mile by mile. 148 00:24:05,152 --> 00:24:09,418 Reporters are not permitted on the trip, only contestants. Those are the rules. 149 00:24:09,489 --> 00:24:12,356 We run a newspaper, not a school for revolutionaries! 150 00:24:12,426 --> 00:24:14,519 Enter the race. Enter your own car. 151 00:24:14,895 --> 00:24:18,490 We are running a newspaper, a newspaper, not an automotive agency! 152 00:24:18,599 --> 00:24:22,035 Are you afraid of losing? Give me the money and I'll enter the race. 153 00:24:22,102 --> 00:24:24,366 I despise suffragettes. 154 00:24:25,172 --> 00:24:27,606 I am not just trying to get the vote for women. 155 00:24:27,674 --> 00:24:32,008 I'll emancipate them from the drudgery of being servants or saints. 156 00:24:33,747 --> 00:24:36,739 Out of the laundry rooms and off the pedestals! 157 00:24:38,518 --> 00:24:40,509 You're mad, young woman, you're mad! 158 00:24:40,587 --> 00:24:43,249 And you, sir, are a slave to your puritanism. 159 00:24:44,591 --> 00:24:46,684 Does your wife wear silk stockings? 160 00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:50,787 - I won't discuss such an intimate subject. - She does, and they're very expensive. 161 00:24:50,864 --> 00:24:53,731 But has she raised her skirts for you and shown her calf? 162 00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:57,133 A woman's leg in a silk stocking can be quite alluring. 163 00:24:58,105 --> 00:24:59,402 Maggie Dubois. 164 00:24:59,473 --> 00:25:02,306 You've never seen a woman's leg in a silk stocking. 165 00:25:02,376 --> 00:25:04,537 Never, never in your whole life. 166 00:25:06,446 --> 00:25:08,607 Frisbee, leave the room! 167 00:25:12,219 --> 00:25:13,811 What are you thinking? 168 00:25:15,489 --> 00:25:19,926 There isn't anything men and women can't discuss when civilized and mature. 169 00:25:19,993 --> 00:25:21,358 And emancipated. 170 00:25:22,296 --> 00:25:25,561 - Anything. - You can't discuss it. That's the problem. 171 00:25:25,632 --> 00:25:28,760 Women have to emancipate themselves in order to emancipate men. 172 00:25:28,835 --> 00:25:31,736 So they can emancipate each other where it counts the most. 173 00:25:31,805 --> 00:25:34,569 Fifty dollars for every exclusive story I send back... 174 00:25:34,641 --> 00:25:37,269 ...and a hundred dollars for every photograph. 175 00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:44,174 You're a fine man. A timid man, but a worthwhile one. 176 00:25:45,185 --> 00:25:46,516 Have a cigar. 177 00:25:48,121 --> 00:25:49,554 Don't smoke? 178 00:26:05,839 --> 00:26:08,239 The Sentinel will scoop the world! 179 00:26:47,881 --> 00:26:49,542 Man the helm! 180 00:26:50,283 --> 00:26:51,648 Aye, aye, sir. 181 00:26:55,655 --> 00:26:58,647 - Up periscope! - Up periscope! 182 00:27:37,531 --> 00:27:39,726 - Good afternoon. - Good afternoon. 183 00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:43,964 I don't know what she's doing here, boss. She says she's a woman with a mission. 184 00:27:44,037 --> 00:27:47,370 But I think she's a spy for Professor Fate. 185 00:27:47,474 --> 00:27:52,605 You're not suggesting I'm the first woman to ever seek an audience with Great Leslie. 186 00:27:53,680 --> 00:27:57,013 I'm simply Leslie and I'm at your service. 187 00:27:57,350 --> 00:28:00,683 I'm rather thirsty. Do you have something cold? 188 00:28:02,656 --> 00:28:04,317 I have champagne. 189 00:28:12,099 --> 00:28:14,761 - Down periscope. - Aye, aye, sir. 190 00:28:18,538 --> 00:28:22,065 Up, idiot! Up, up! 191 00:28:32,586 --> 00:28:34,110 I got you. 192 00:28:35,388 --> 00:28:38,619 There's something wrong with the mechanism. 193 00:28:40,727 --> 00:28:42,058 Down, you idiot! 194 00:28:42,129 --> 00:28:45,121 Release your feet. Release your feet! 195 00:28:46,032 --> 00:28:49,763 - You have to be careful... - You've got a brain the size of a carbuncle. 196 00:28:49,970 --> 00:28:52,461 Get out of here before Leslie spots us! 197 00:28:53,306 --> 00:28:55,467 Dive, crash dive! 198 00:28:57,477 --> 00:28:58,739 Help! 199 00:29:01,515 --> 00:29:04,348 Wait. Professor! 200 00:30:40,647 --> 00:30:42,046 I'm a reporter. 201 00:30:44,317 --> 00:30:45,750 A reporter? 202 00:30:47,354 --> 00:30:48,685 You disapprove? 203 00:30:49,956 --> 00:30:53,448 No. Let's say I'm a bit surprised. 204 00:30:53,793 --> 00:30:55,954 Let's be honest and say you disapprove. 205 00:30:56,029 --> 00:31:00,022 A woman doing a man's job is competitive, both sexually and economically. 206 00:31:01,101 --> 00:31:05,765 You want to know why I'm here. I want to report the race and be in it. 207 00:31:07,140 --> 00:31:08,767 It's as simple as that. 208 00:31:10,710 --> 00:31:14,202 Well, it's hardly that simple. But... 209 00:31:16,349 --> 00:31:18,180 ...let's discuss it, shall we? 210 00:31:18,685 --> 00:31:22,644 Let's discuss the whole thing completely. Right from the beginning. 211 00:31:22,722 --> 00:31:27,386 Do you want a wife, a companion? Or just a woman? 212 00:31:28,561 --> 00:31:31,189 There are certain things we shouldn't discuss. 213 00:31:31,731 --> 00:31:35,064 Why? Men discuss their relationships with women. 214 00:31:35,402 --> 00:31:37,233 Gentlemen don't. 215 00:31:39,039 --> 00:31:42,372 But I'm not a gentleman. I'm a woman. 216 00:31:44,778 --> 00:31:46,109 Indeed you are. 217 00:31:46,513 --> 00:31:48,981 Then say it. What's expected of me? 218 00:31:49,316 --> 00:31:52,376 I'm an emancipated woman and you're an emancipated man. 219 00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:56,983 There are things that should remain implicit between men and women. 220 00:31:58,525 --> 00:31:59,685 Why? 221 00:32:01,127 --> 00:32:04,255 It's been this way for years and I see no reason to change. 222 00:32:04,331 --> 00:32:07,129 - I am a creature of habit. - All the more reason. 223 00:32:08,802 --> 00:32:12,135 Now you're using your female attractiveness as a weapon. 224 00:32:13,073 --> 00:32:17,737 Equality, real equality of the sexes bothers you, doesn't it. 225 00:32:20,980 --> 00:32:23,710 I can speak, read and write Russian, French and Arabic. 226 00:32:23,783 --> 00:32:25,876 Yes, so can I. Plus five other languages. 227 00:32:25,952 --> 00:32:28,887 - I can drive any car there is. - So can Hezekiah. 228 00:32:29,989 --> 00:32:32,822 I won the Woman's International Competition. 229 00:32:36,496 --> 00:32:37,827 En garde. 230 00:32:40,166 --> 00:32:41,656 Very well. 231 00:33:11,631 --> 00:33:15,567 Now if you'd won the Men's International Fencing Competition... 232 00:33:21,674 --> 00:33:23,665 Now, we'll talk this out. 233 00:33:37,524 --> 00:33:39,685 Now if you'll excuse me. 234 00:33:45,031 --> 00:33:47,659 Hezekiah, see Miss Dubois to her horse please. 235 00:33:47,734 --> 00:33:50,396 You're afraid! You're afraid of a real woman! 236 00:33:51,337 --> 00:33:55,831 I'll show you! I'll enter the race myself. I'll enter my own car and I'll beat you! 237 00:33:56,209 --> 00:33:57,870 And another thing... 238 00:34:42,856 --> 00:34:46,019 Professor, dinner is served. 239 00:35:16,990 --> 00:35:18,480 Who is it? 240 00:35:18,658 --> 00:35:23,322 I wish to see Professor Fate. I'm a reporter. For The Sentinel. 241 00:35:23,630 --> 00:35:26,463 Beat it, little girl, or I'll sic the dogs on you. 242 00:35:38,444 --> 00:35:39,741 Who was that? 243 00:35:39,946 --> 00:35:43,507 - Kids, just kids, more kids. - Stupid kids. 244 00:35:48,087 --> 00:35:50,078 You want me to feed you? 245 00:36:35,368 --> 00:36:36,858 Listen to that! 246 00:36:42,642 --> 00:36:45,634 Out back by the garage. The car! Hurry up! 247 00:37:01,661 --> 00:37:02,889 Help! 248 00:37:04,097 --> 00:37:05,223 Help! 249 00:37:08,334 --> 00:37:12,600 - You sure you locked the door? - I'm positive. Professor, be careful. 250 00:37:12,672 --> 00:37:16,039 If you open the door one inch, it sets off the alarm. 251 00:37:16,676 --> 00:37:17,973 Help! 252 00:37:44,103 --> 00:37:46,162 Get away! Get away! 253 00:37:49,876 --> 00:37:51,537 Help! Get me down! 254 00:37:53,446 --> 00:37:54,435 Go away. 255 00:37:55,848 --> 00:37:57,213 You idiot. 256 00:37:59,585 --> 00:38:01,644 Get me down! Help! 257 00:38:03,790 --> 00:38:05,951 Get me down! Please! 258 00:38:13,700 --> 00:38:15,861 Out! And stay out! 259 00:38:16,269 --> 00:38:18,863 You can't treat me that way! I'll expose you! 260 00:38:20,406 --> 00:38:24,775 Out! And stay out! A pox on you! 261 00:38:24,911 --> 00:38:27,607 I don't care. You beast of a turncoat! 262 00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:30,046 What are you kicking the professor for? 263 00:38:31,951 --> 00:38:34,943 Put up your dukes! Come on! 264 00:38:35,788 --> 00:38:37,415 You're a lunatic! A lunatic! 265 00:38:37,490 --> 00:38:40,687 You can't talk to me that way! I'm a member of the press. 266 00:38:54,607 --> 00:38:58,600 Get off the car, please. Will you just get off the car? 267 00:39:01,681 --> 00:39:05,674 Hands off the car. Get away from there. 268 00:39:07,353 --> 00:39:11,551 Keep your hands away from there. Get off of the car! Get away from the car. 269 00:39:12,859 --> 00:39:14,690 - Get away from there! - Hold it. 270 00:39:16,662 --> 00:39:17,959 That's it. 271 00:39:33,479 --> 00:39:35,140 Away from the car! 272 00:39:52,999 --> 00:39:54,330 Hold it. 273 00:39:56,435 --> 00:39:57,697 That's it. 274 00:40:09,081 --> 00:40:11,641 - Everything is ready? - Everything is ready. 275 00:40:22,028 --> 00:40:23,154 Hold it. 276 00:40:24,330 --> 00:40:27,663 Just stay away from the automobile. I'll sign it for you. 277 00:40:27,934 --> 00:40:30,562 I checked everything over twice. We're ready to go. 278 00:40:30,636 --> 00:40:34,072 Look, buddy, will you please step to one side like a good boy? 279 00:40:56,128 --> 00:40:59,256 - What do you think you're doing? - I'm an official entry. 280 00:41:00,299 --> 00:41:02,392 - Representing The Sentinel. - What? 281 00:41:02,668 --> 00:41:07,469 Since it is my job as a reporter to be there when the first car crosses the finish line... 282 00:41:07,573 --> 00:41:10,269 ...it will be necessary for me to win. 283 00:41:16,349 --> 00:41:18,681 Imagine that crazy female! 284 00:41:18,951 --> 00:41:21,886 She won't even get as far as Albany in that Steamer. 285 00:41:22,088 --> 00:41:26,149 Don't bet on it. That's a very determined young lady. 286 00:41:26,359 --> 00:41:28,190 Good morning, Hester. 287 00:41:28,261 --> 00:41:29,626 Have a cigar? 288 00:41:30,663 --> 00:41:34,030 I want to thank you again for this opportunity, Mr. Goodbody. 289 00:41:34,100 --> 00:41:37,035 I had little choice after your conversation with my wife. 290 00:41:37,103 --> 00:41:39,731 Henry, if you can't be more gracious, shut up! 291 00:41:39,972 --> 00:41:43,499 - It's a great day for the cause, Maggie. - It is indeed, Hester. 292 00:41:48,848 --> 00:41:50,839 Drivers, to your cars! 293 00:42:00,660 --> 00:42:02,491 - Hezekiah. - Boss. 294 00:42:04,330 --> 00:42:05,524 All right, Max. 295 00:42:05,631 --> 00:42:07,758 - Good luck, Maggie. - Thank you. 296 00:42:12,305 --> 00:42:13,670 Max! 297 00:42:21,113 --> 00:42:23,377 - Come on, Max! - All checked. 298 00:43:54,707 --> 00:43:57,301 Are you sure you took care of everything? 299 00:43:57,510 --> 00:43:59,944 Just keep your eye on car number 2. 300 00:44:23,402 --> 00:44:28,066 Now, at approximately the 50 mile mark, car number 3, it loses its transmission. 301 00:44:40,352 --> 00:44:43,583 And in about five seconds, car number 4 bites the dust. 302 00:44:53,866 --> 00:44:56,664 Genius, Max, positive genius. What's next? 303 00:44:57,036 --> 00:45:01,132 - Car number 5, the engine falls out. - Car number five? 304 00:45:02,274 --> 00:45:05,505 Max! We're number 5. 305 00:45:27,299 --> 00:45:31,861 That shouldn't happen to number 6. I fixed it so the wheels would come off. 306 00:45:38,410 --> 00:45:40,571 Smoke! Get the fire extinguisher! 307 00:45:41,013 --> 00:45:44,642 - I got the extinguisher! - Get the extinguisher! 308 00:45:44,717 --> 00:45:47,185 Coming through. I got it. 309 00:45:50,656 --> 00:45:53,921 I think we got it in time. I think we got it! 310 00:45:55,928 --> 00:45:58,419 I think we got it now, Professor. 311 00:45:58,597 --> 00:46:00,588 Okay, she's out. 312 00:46:02,434 --> 00:46:04,834 Where are you? 313 00:46:06,505 --> 00:46:09,269 - Where are you? - To your right. 314 00:46:32,631 --> 00:46:33,723 Hold it. 315 00:47:06,565 --> 00:47:07,998 That was a pigeon. 316 00:47:44,870 --> 00:47:47,100 - Get the bird. - Yes, sir. 317 00:47:47,206 --> 00:47:51,199 - Come here, bird, just come here. - All right. Hurry up, will you, Frisbee? 318 00:47:52,544 --> 00:47:54,341 Frisbee, just get the bird. 319 00:47:58,584 --> 00:48:01,109 Don't lollygag out there, just get the bird. 320 00:48:01,520 --> 00:48:03,317 I got him. I got him, sir. 321 00:48:06,525 --> 00:48:08,652 - Frisbee. - Yes, I got the bird. 322 00:48:08,827 --> 00:48:11,955 Just hold it. Frisbee. Just be quiet. 323 00:48:12,197 --> 00:48:16,861 Yes, sir. Oh, help me, sir. Oh, please try to save me, sir. 324 00:48:17,202 --> 00:48:21,104 Just be steady, Frisbee. Just be steady. Be quiet now. 325 00:48:22,141 --> 00:48:25,907 And it's organizations like The Sentinel that we must deal with first. 326 00:48:25,978 --> 00:48:29,311 Why, at this very moment the editor sits behind his desk... 327 00:48:34,186 --> 00:48:38,850 Frisbee, next time be more careful. If you're falling, let go of the bird. 328 00:48:53,439 --> 00:48:58,103 "Sentinel car takes lead approximately 600 miles west of Chicago." 329 00:48:58,644 --> 00:48:59,633 Frisbee! 330 00:49:08,954 --> 00:49:11,149 Well, that should put us about here. 331 00:49:33,979 --> 00:49:35,310 Farewell. 332 00:50:03,609 --> 00:50:06,373 Hezekiah, see what's wrong with her car. 333 00:50:19,758 --> 00:50:22,784 - I must have fainted. - Perfectly natural in this heat. 334 00:50:23,595 --> 00:50:25,859 - Thank you for stopping. - My pleasure. 335 00:50:26,331 --> 00:50:27,889 May I offer you some water? 336 00:50:27,966 --> 00:50:30,560 No, I'm much better now. Thank you. 337 00:50:30,736 --> 00:50:34,001 - Hezekiah, can she be fixed? - Not a chance, boss. 338 00:50:35,874 --> 00:50:38,707 Well, I guess that's the end of that. 339 00:50:40,112 --> 00:50:42,478 I know how disappointed you must be. 340 00:50:42,714 --> 00:50:46,172 But it's amazing that you were able to accomplish what you did. 341 00:50:46,285 --> 00:50:48,549 You mean amazing because I'm a woman. 342 00:50:48,854 --> 00:50:51,687 The Steamer is a fast, sporty, attractive automobile... 343 00:50:51,757 --> 00:50:54,225 ...designed for city driving and country picnics. 344 00:50:54,293 --> 00:50:56,284 You're lucky it didn't blow up on you. 345 00:50:56,361 --> 00:51:01,025 You know, it's really amazing that anyone was able to go this far. I congratulate you. 346 00:51:01,333 --> 00:51:03,733 Not as a woman, but an intrepid autoist. 347 00:51:04,636 --> 00:51:07,127 You mean an intrepid woman autoist. 348 00:51:07,272 --> 00:51:11,504 A rather dubious honor when you consider that the accomplishment is predicated... 349 00:51:11,577 --> 00:51:14,444 ...on the fact that you chose the wrong automobile. 350 00:51:15,614 --> 00:51:19,516 But the choice was not mine. My editor, a man, made the arrangements. 351 00:51:19,585 --> 00:51:22,611 Your editor is something less than an authority on automobiles. 352 00:51:22,688 --> 00:51:27,352 But you, on the other hand, claim full knowledge of the auto and its workings. 353 00:51:29,261 --> 00:51:33,925 So, being a woman, you chose to ignore the practical evidence, acted emotionally... 354 00:51:34,333 --> 00:51:37,860 ...entered the race knowing full well that you couldn't possibly finish. 355 00:51:37,936 --> 00:51:39,267 Oh, I'll finish. 356 00:51:40,472 --> 00:51:41,803 May I ask how? 357 00:51:42,007 --> 00:51:46,376 No, you may not ask how, but I'll finish. I may not still be an official entry... 358 00:51:46,545 --> 00:51:48,945 ...but I will report every foot of this race. 359 00:51:49,014 --> 00:51:51,141 - I'll get another car. - From where? 360 00:51:51,350 --> 00:51:56,549 If I don't, I'll get something else. I'll find a way, even if I have to walk. 361 00:51:58,190 --> 00:51:59,623 What are you waiting for? 362 00:51:59,691 --> 00:52:02,751 Every minute wasted is another mile for Professor Fate. 363 00:52:06,298 --> 00:52:09,665 We'll take you as far as Boracho, where I pick up some gasoline. 364 00:52:09,735 --> 00:52:12,499 - Perfect. - From there, you're on your own! 365 00:52:13,005 --> 00:52:14,939 Thank you. My luggage, please. 366 00:52:15,207 --> 00:52:17,698 Hezekiah, the young lady's luggage please. 367 00:53:08,193 --> 00:53:10,218 Indian attack! We're being attacked! 368 00:53:10,295 --> 00:53:13,162 Smoke screen, Max! Give them the smoke screen! 369 00:53:17,903 --> 00:53:21,566 No, you idiot! The smoke screen! Push the button, Max! 370 00:53:21,773 --> 00:53:23,104 Smoke screen! 371 00:54:00,912 --> 00:54:03,403 Get it down! Get it down! 372 00:54:04,750 --> 00:54:08,413 Take cover, you fools, take cover! 373 00:54:08,487 --> 00:54:10,478 Indians! Savages! 374 00:54:11,490 --> 00:54:15,256 Indian attack! Get a posse! Savages behind us! 375 00:54:16,328 --> 00:54:18,922 - Help! - Savages attacking us! Indians! 376 00:54:19,998 --> 00:54:22,023 Take cover! 377 00:54:22,100 --> 00:54:23,499 Welcome to Boracho. 378 00:54:23,568 --> 00:54:26,332 Yes, thank you. Indians, savages attacking us! 379 00:54:26,638 --> 00:54:29,903 - Right behind us. An attack! - What's funny? 380 00:54:30,742 --> 00:54:34,678 That was just the sheriff and some of the men dressed up like Indians. 381 00:54:34,746 --> 00:54:39,080 - Why, they rode out to welcome you. - That's very reassuring, Mr. Mayor. 382 00:54:39,151 --> 00:54:42,917 Now if you will just show us where the gasoline is, we'll be on our way. 383 00:54:42,988 --> 00:54:44,819 You understand every second counts. 384 00:54:44,890 --> 00:54:48,587 - You can't go now. - What do you mean we can't go now? 385 00:54:49,461 --> 00:54:50,928 You're the guest of honor. 386 00:54:50,996 --> 00:54:53,464 Well, I don't want to be a guest of honor. 387 00:54:53,532 --> 00:54:56,057 I got to present you with this here key to the city! 388 00:54:56,134 --> 00:54:57,931 He doesn't want a key, he wants gas! 389 00:54:58,003 --> 00:55:01,700 - As Mayor of Boracho, l... - I want gas and I want it now! 390 00:55:01,773 --> 00:55:04,936 - You ain't gonna get no gas till tomorrow! - Tomorrow. 391 00:55:05,210 --> 00:55:07,371 You're gonna accept this here key. 392 00:55:08,013 --> 00:55:10,174 You're gonna attend that meeting tonight... 393 00:55:10,248 --> 00:55:15,117 ...or, by jumped-up Harry, you're gonna be guest of honor at a necktie party! 394 00:55:15,220 --> 00:55:17,950 Necktie? Well, what kind of cheap present is that? 395 00:55:19,057 --> 00:55:21,992 Listen to me, you cheap, mealy-mouthed, third-rate war healer! 396 00:55:22,060 --> 00:55:24,119 - Somebody get me a rope. - You want a rope? 397 00:55:24,196 --> 00:55:25,891 I got a rope in the car. 398 00:55:26,231 --> 00:55:29,291 Somebody get me a rope! Hurry up, they're leaving. 399 00:55:30,902 --> 00:55:34,201 Oh! Get me a rope, somebody! Get me a rope! 400 00:55:46,218 --> 00:55:48,982 - You gonna give us any trouble? - I beg your pardon. 401 00:55:49,054 --> 00:55:51,887 We been planning this here shindig for over a week. 402 00:55:51,957 --> 00:55:55,893 Now do we string up the bunch of you or cooperate and be the guest of honor. 403 00:55:55,961 --> 00:56:01,365 I greet you with cordiality and good cheer. It's a pleasure to be the great honor. 404 00:56:01,666 --> 00:56:05,466 It's a big celebration tonight. You ain't gonna get no gas till tomorrow. 405 00:56:05,537 --> 00:56:11,032 We look forward to celebrating and the hospitality of your community. 406 00:57:12,671 --> 00:57:16,334 Quiet! Citizens of Boracho! Quiet! 407 00:57:16,508 --> 00:57:18,874 Citizens of Boracho. Thank you. 408 00:57:19,377 --> 00:57:22,710 As Mayor of Boracho, I offer a toast... 409 00:57:23,281 --> 00:57:26,444 ...to our guest of honor, The Great Leslie! 410 00:57:33,291 --> 00:57:35,521 To the fair city of Boracho. 411 00:57:42,934 --> 00:57:44,424 Now here she is... 412 00:57:44,803 --> 00:57:49,297 ...the Queen of the West, Boracho's own Lily Olay! 413 01:00:38,543 --> 01:00:40,909 - I spotted the gas! - Shut up. 414 01:01:47,612 --> 01:01:50,945 Howdy, Mayor. Howdy, Sheriff. Hello, there, Curly. 415 01:01:52,450 --> 01:01:53,610 Hello, there. 416 01:01:53,685 --> 01:01:56,711 Lily, this here's our guest of honor, The Great Leslie. 417 01:01:56,788 --> 01:01:58,278 It's a pleasure to meet you. 418 01:01:58,356 --> 01:02:00,620 Welcome to Boracho, honey. 419 01:02:04,629 --> 01:02:05,994 Won't you join us? 420 01:02:06,064 --> 01:02:09,465 Just for a minute. Scoot over. How long are y'all going to be here? 421 01:02:09,534 --> 01:02:13,026 Unfortunately, just for the night. We have to leave in the morning. 422 01:02:13,104 --> 01:02:14,093 That's a pity. 423 01:02:14,372 --> 01:02:17,034 I would like to propose a toast to Miss Olay. 424 01:02:21,379 --> 01:02:26,043 It's lucky Texas Jack ain't around. He'd gun that dude for sure. 425 01:02:32,524 --> 01:02:37,188 Pardon me, Mr. Partner. Who is this Texas Jack? 426 01:02:38,029 --> 01:02:39,690 Who's Texas Jack? 427 01:02:40,832 --> 01:02:44,495 The roughest, toughest gunslinger in these parts. 428 01:02:44,636 --> 01:02:46,069 Lily is his girl. 429 01:02:48,039 --> 01:02:51,770 - Lily's his girl. - Terrific! 430 01:03:02,420 --> 01:03:05,253 Honey, your smile is downright painful! 431 01:03:05,356 --> 01:03:07,916 Thank you. Are you a native of Boracho? 432 01:03:08,393 --> 01:03:10,725 I ain't no native, I was born here! 433 01:03:12,397 --> 01:03:14,297 - Mr. Partner. - Yes. 434 01:03:14,365 --> 01:03:16,799 Where would I find this Texas Jack? 435 01:03:17,035 --> 01:03:19,833 He's got a ranch about eight miles south of town. 436 01:03:24,943 --> 01:03:28,902 I have to get on that moon again. Don't go away, you hear? 437 01:03:28,980 --> 01:03:32,416 - It's been a pleasure to meet you. - Welcome to Boracho, honey. 438 01:03:46,097 --> 01:03:47,086 Jack. 439 01:04:00,745 --> 01:04:04,738 Now wait a minute, Jack. This is a friendly celebration. 440 01:04:05,116 --> 01:04:09,177 Fiddle-de-dee! I don't much like the way you're celebrating. 441 01:04:09,454 --> 01:04:12,787 So you just step back, Sheriff, unless you want to fall back. 442 01:04:14,158 --> 01:04:15,819 Howdy, Jack, honey. 443 01:04:27,171 --> 01:04:30,163 Jack, honey, don't get rough. He's the guest of honor. 444 01:04:36,781 --> 01:04:38,180 Now just a moment. 445 01:04:43,788 --> 01:04:48,452 I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage. As you can see, I am unarmed. 446 01:04:49,193 --> 01:04:50,524 He's unarmed. 447 01:04:58,670 --> 01:05:00,365 - Let's get the gas. - Not yet. 448 01:05:00,438 --> 01:05:05,102 All right now, everybody stand back and give a man some fighting room. 449 01:05:13,985 --> 01:05:16,385 Now will you give me some fighting room? 450 01:05:23,227 --> 01:05:24,558 My camera! 451 01:05:44,615 --> 01:05:47,846 Citizens of Boracho, stop! 452 01:05:48,152 --> 01:05:50,882 Music, somebody! Start the music! 453 01:06:14,545 --> 01:06:16,513 Citizens of Boracho! 454 01:06:34,031 --> 01:06:36,795 Now will you give me some fighting room? 455 01:06:36,968 --> 01:06:38,595 Jack, honey! 456 01:06:48,246 --> 01:06:50,146 Excuse me, please. 457 01:07:10,768 --> 01:07:13,635 - Now look what you've done. - Me? 458 01:07:44,368 --> 01:07:45,699 There's the gas. 459 01:07:45,803 --> 01:07:49,170 There's a fight! Fight in the saloon! Fight! 460 01:07:49,240 --> 01:07:52,038 Fight in the saloon! Big fight! Fight! 461 01:07:52,210 --> 01:07:55,907 Fight! There's a big fight in the saloon. Texas Jack! He's drunk! 462 01:08:06,624 --> 01:08:08,956 Max! Max, you idiot, the gas. 463 01:08:15,233 --> 01:08:16,564 Where's the car? 464 01:08:18,035 --> 01:08:19,366 Get the car! 465 01:08:46,664 --> 01:08:48,495 Hey, boss! 466 01:09:51,862 --> 01:09:55,423 Now can I have me some fighting room? 467 01:10:02,707 --> 01:10:06,006 The back is full. I'll put the rest of the gas in the seat. 468 01:10:06,143 --> 01:10:08,338 Leave it? Can't leave it for Leslie. 469 01:10:08,412 --> 01:10:11,745 Leave Leslie to me. Start the car. The car. 470 01:10:13,084 --> 01:10:14,381 Switch on! 471 01:10:21,792 --> 01:10:23,453 My apologies. 472 01:10:29,066 --> 01:10:30,397 The gasoline! 473 01:10:37,108 --> 01:10:38,769 We shall win! 474 01:10:55,259 --> 01:10:56,749 Well, that finishes Leslie. 475 01:10:56,827 --> 01:10:59,318 Oh, no, not Leslie. Never Leslie. 476 01:10:59,563 --> 01:11:04,296 The Great Leslie. He'll think of something, but we'll be in Alaska by the time he does. 477 01:11:41,505 --> 01:11:43,200 I'm offering you a lift. 478 01:11:49,714 --> 01:11:52,239 Or would you prefer an engraved invitation? 479 01:11:55,953 --> 01:11:58,979 - I might consider an apology. - An apology? 480 01:11:59,857 --> 01:12:02,155 For what? It's twenty miles back to Boracho. 481 01:12:02,226 --> 01:12:04,922 - You'd never make it. - Well, that's your fault. 482 01:12:05,262 --> 01:12:06,251 My fault. 483 01:12:06,464 --> 01:12:09,365 I warned you. I would not be left behind in Boracho. 484 01:12:09,433 --> 01:12:12,334 You left me no choice so I had to stow away in Fate's car. 485 01:12:12,403 --> 01:12:14,132 And he cast you adrift. 486 01:12:14,638 --> 01:12:17,471 If you had provided me with transportation to Grommett... 487 01:12:17,541 --> 01:12:20,772 ...where I could have caught a train, it never would have happened. 488 01:12:20,845 --> 01:12:23,575 Grommett was 100 miles out of our way. 489 01:12:24,381 --> 01:12:26,542 And where are you going now? 490 01:12:27,251 --> 01:12:31,915 Professor Fate destroyed all the gasoline, Grommett is a matter of necessity. 491 01:12:32,757 --> 01:12:35,624 And when you reach Grommett you'll send for gasoline? 492 01:12:35,693 --> 01:12:40,062 But if you were to send for gasoline now it would be in Grommett when you arrived. 493 01:12:40,197 --> 01:12:43,496 If I were to send for gasoline now I would need a telegraph. 494 01:12:44,902 --> 01:12:46,392 Not necessarily. 495 01:12:56,714 --> 01:12:59,182 I will take you no further than Grommett. 496 01:13:23,741 --> 01:13:25,732 Hey, Professor, where we going? 497 01:13:25,910 --> 01:13:29,903 We save 15 miles by following the tracks, Max. 498 01:13:30,981 --> 01:13:32,209 Oh, terrific! 499 01:14:13,591 --> 01:14:15,582 - Is that gasoline? - Sure is. 500 01:14:16,093 --> 01:14:18,357 Let me give you a hand with it. 501 01:14:18,429 --> 01:14:20,124 Wait a minute. 502 01:14:20,431 --> 01:14:23,696 - Nobody gets nothing till it's signed for. - Of course. 503 01:14:23,934 --> 01:14:26,664 - You M. Dubois? - I beg your pardon. 504 01:14:27,171 --> 01:14:30,106 - Gasoline consigned to M. Dubois. - What? 505 01:14:30,307 --> 01:14:32,366 - Oh, I'm M. Dubois. - I knew it. 506 01:14:32,443 --> 01:14:33,933 You got some identification? 507 01:14:34,011 --> 01:14:36,707 What did I tell you? I told you not to trust her. 508 01:14:37,248 --> 01:14:38,579 My press card. 509 01:14:40,050 --> 01:14:42,041 Okay, just sign on the line. 510 01:14:43,587 --> 01:14:45,714 - What if I don't sign? - You see. 511 01:14:46,190 --> 01:14:49,023 Look, ma'am, you don't sign, you don't get no gas. 512 01:14:49,460 --> 01:14:53,123 Well, Mr. Leslie? You wish to continue the race, so do I. 513 01:14:53,530 --> 01:14:55,259 As far as the West Coast? 514 01:14:55,499 --> 01:14:57,990 If she goes, I stay! 515 01:14:59,003 --> 01:15:00,163 Hezekiah. 516 01:15:00,237 --> 01:15:02,797 You going to sign or do I send the gas back to New York? 517 01:15:02,873 --> 01:15:04,340 Miss Dubois, this is very... 518 01:15:04,408 --> 01:15:06,899 The gas is yours if you take me to the West Coast. 519 01:15:06,977 --> 01:15:09,537 Under the circumstances, it's a fair exchange. 520 01:15:09,613 --> 01:15:11,740 Load the gas back on the train. 521 01:15:11,815 --> 01:15:14,784 She's not signing and the train's leaving in five minutes. 522 01:15:14,852 --> 01:15:18,913 Just one moment, please, sir. I will not leave without Hezekiah. 523 01:15:19,156 --> 01:15:20,885 If I can change his mind? 524 01:15:28,098 --> 01:15:30,589 Suppose you don't change his mind? 525 01:15:31,135 --> 01:15:34,070 Then I shall take this train back to New York. 526 01:15:36,840 --> 01:15:39,570 Sir, let me give you a hand with the gasoline. 527 01:15:39,643 --> 01:15:41,770 Boys, would you care to join me? 528 01:15:45,282 --> 01:15:49,946 Hezekiah, I understand how you feel, but I beg you to reconsider. 529 01:15:52,323 --> 01:15:53,654 A deal is a deal. 530 01:15:58,595 --> 01:16:02,258 Then I guess I'll have to hurry or I'll miss my train. Goodbye, Hezekiah. 531 01:16:02,700 --> 01:16:03,928 You mean... 532 01:16:04,768 --> 01:16:07,669 Well, a deal is a deal. It's been wonderful knowing you. 533 01:16:08,439 --> 01:16:09,770 What about the gas? 534 01:16:10,140 --> 01:16:11,266 I signed for it. 535 01:16:13,644 --> 01:16:17,580 I'm sorry. You see, this race ain't the right place for a woman. 536 01:16:18,849 --> 01:16:19,873 I understand. 537 01:16:20,050 --> 01:16:21,244 Board! 538 01:16:21,852 --> 01:16:22,841 Well. 539 01:16:24,655 --> 01:16:27,647 - Would you take me to the train? - Well, yes, ma'am. 540 01:16:33,964 --> 01:16:36,455 Boys and girls, this is a six-cylinder automobile... 541 01:16:36,533 --> 01:16:38,899 ...with an overhead cam that can... 542 01:16:39,103 --> 01:16:42,470 It was built by a company especially for me, for this race. 543 01:17:02,493 --> 01:17:04,757 He just wouldn't listen. 544 01:17:05,662 --> 01:17:08,392 I told him, and he said that... 545 01:17:09,266 --> 01:17:13,930 ...he's had enough and he didn't think you could win anyway. 546 01:17:14,138 --> 01:17:15,127 And... 547 01:17:16,173 --> 01:17:19,336 ...he said he was going to go back to New York. 548 01:17:21,111 --> 01:17:22,738 Double-crossing females! 549 01:17:24,281 --> 01:17:26,249 Hey, boss! Look. 550 01:17:27,684 --> 01:17:29,515 Hey, conductor! 551 01:17:30,454 --> 01:17:33,184 You are trying my patience, madam. 552 01:17:33,624 --> 01:17:34,955 We know our rights. 553 01:17:35,526 --> 01:17:38,086 You're obstructing traffic and disturbing the peace! 554 01:17:38,262 --> 01:17:42,255 - And you are exceeding your authority. - I ain't exceeding nothing, lady! 555 01:17:42,399 --> 01:17:44,196 - Then, arrest us. - What? 556 01:17:44,501 --> 01:17:46,901 Arrest us. I dare you. 557 01:17:55,245 --> 01:17:56,177 Sorry, sir. 558 01:17:56,380 --> 01:17:59,213 I want you to run to City Hall and bail out Mrs. Goodbody. 559 01:17:59,283 --> 01:18:00,181 Yes, sir. 560 01:18:00,417 --> 01:18:01,816 In about two hours. 561 01:18:02,219 --> 01:18:03,049 Yes, sir. 562 01:18:30,848 --> 01:18:33,408 I once went on an anthropological expedition... 563 01:18:33,550 --> 01:18:35,882 ...to study the Kwakiutl Indians. 564 01:18:36,753 --> 01:18:40,211 In winter, one Kwakiutl in a blanket froze. 565 01:18:41,492 --> 01:18:44,325 But two Kwakiutls in the same blanket... 566 01:18:46,830 --> 01:18:47,762 Yes? 567 01:18:48,232 --> 01:18:49,164 Were warmer. 568 01:18:56,940 --> 01:18:58,498 Would you hold this, please? 569 01:18:58,775 --> 01:18:59,764 Champagne? 570 01:19:00,844 --> 01:19:03,335 You put alcohol in the radiator of the automobile... 571 01:19:03,447 --> 01:19:05,608 ...to keep it from freezing, don't you? 572 01:19:19,196 --> 01:19:20,720 I can't see a thing. 573 01:19:21,932 --> 01:19:23,331 Neither can I. 574 01:19:25,702 --> 01:19:27,101 Maybe we better stop. 575 01:19:35,245 --> 01:19:37,577 I can't stand it, I'm freezing to death. 576 01:19:37,981 --> 01:19:38,970 Shut up! 577 01:19:40,584 --> 01:19:42,313 Even the thermometer is frozen. 578 01:19:43,587 --> 01:19:45,179 Everything's frozen. 579 01:19:50,894 --> 01:19:52,054 Look at that! 580 01:20:08,145 --> 01:20:11,308 It won't take long to grow back. It's only a half of a mustache. 581 01:20:31,635 --> 01:20:32,761 What was that? 582 01:20:33,570 --> 01:20:34,559 I don't know. 583 01:20:35,105 --> 01:20:36,538 Well, I'll go see. 584 01:20:49,886 --> 01:20:51,979 Miss Dubois, please. Thank you. 585 01:21:31,194 --> 01:21:35,290 I'm terribly sorry. I thought you were Maximillian. 586 01:21:36,233 --> 01:21:40,260 Nothing to worry about. We have a lot more champagne in the car. 587 01:22:01,639 --> 01:22:03,698 Professor! 588 01:22:04,608 --> 01:22:05,939 Yes! 589 01:22:06,877 --> 01:22:08,936 Where are you? 590 01:22:10,081 --> 01:22:11,810 Behind the rock! 591 01:22:12,183 --> 01:22:14,242 Behind which rock? 592 01:22:18,489 --> 01:22:21,481 This rock, you idiot. Come on. 593 01:22:30,935 --> 01:22:34,098 Close the door and hurry it. Bring it up! 594 01:22:41,712 --> 01:22:43,077 We're safe up here. 595 01:22:43,381 --> 01:22:45,042 Yeah, safe here. 596 01:22:51,689 --> 01:22:53,179 Help! 597 01:22:57,595 --> 01:23:00,860 My apologies. There's a polar bear in our car. 598 01:23:01,065 --> 01:23:05,798 If you don't leave this car immediately, I shall personally feed you to the bear. 599 01:23:06,036 --> 01:23:09,335 If the bears don't get us, we'll certainly freeze to death out there! 600 01:23:10,274 --> 01:23:13,710 As far as freezing is concerned, you have the same chance that we have. 601 01:23:13,944 --> 01:23:16,970 - Not if you put us out in the blizzard. - Snowing very bad. 602 01:23:17,114 --> 01:23:20,777 May I point out that you've completely demolished my top. 603 01:23:21,118 --> 01:23:24,918 And there's very little difference between the blizzard out there and in here. 604 01:23:25,089 --> 01:23:27,353 Except that you have blankets and stimulants. 605 01:23:27,558 --> 01:23:28,456 Stimulants. 606 01:23:28,759 --> 01:23:29,987 He's right. 607 01:23:30,261 --> 01:23:32,161 Miss Dubois, you're not suggesting... 608 01:23:32,229 --> 01:23:34,959 If two in a blanket stand a better chance than one... 609 01:23:35,132 --> 01:23:36,861 Then four in a blanket... 610 01:23:37,034 --> 01:23:38,592 He's a cheat and a liar. 611 01:23:38,769 --> 01:23:40,566 That's beside the point. 612 01:23:40,905 --> 01:23:42,702 The point is that we're freezing. 613 01:23:42,873 --> 01:23:46,502 Yes, and the time has come to cast aside our personal differences. 614 01:23:46,744 --> 01:23:48,041 Bury the hatchet. 615 01:23:48,612 --> 01:23:50,409 And you know who has the hatchet. 616 01:23:50,581 --> 01:23:53,277 He doesn't even have a whole moustache... 617 01:23:53,350 --> 01:23:56,615 ...so why can't we settle this whole thing underneath the blanket? 618 01:23:56,854 --> 01:23:59,823 We must get underneath the blankets together. Close together. 619 01:24:00,324 --> 01:24:04,021 Therefore, it will be necessary to lower the seat. 620 01:24:04,762 --> 01:24:06,593 Lower the seat! 621 01:24:07,264 --> 01:24:09,425 Max, the back! 622 01:24:09,767 --> 01:24:12,258 The foot. Watch that foot! 623 01:24:13,838 --> 01:24:15,396 I beg your pardon. 624 01:24:15,573 --> 01:24:17,006 Champagne, Professor? 625 01:24:17,174 --> 01:24:18,163 Thank you. 626 01:24:19,477 --> 01:24:21,468 Hey, this is terrific. 627 01:24:21,846 --> 01:24:23,837 May I propose a toast? 628 01:24:25,783 --> 01:24:27,808 What's so funny? Something wrong? 629 01:24:27,985 --> 01:24:30,215 What happened to your mustache? 630 01:24:30,387 --> 01:24:32,548 - I broke it off. - You what? 631 01:24:32,723 --> 01:24:35,624 I broke it off. It was frozen. Look. 632 01:24:54,578 --> 01:24:55,909 What time is it? 633 01:24:56,881 --> 01:24:58,212 Just a moment. 634 01:25:11,662 --> 01:25:13,095 7:30. 635 01:25:16,934 --> 01:25:18,697 - Good morning. - Good morning. 636 01:25:18,903 --> 01:25:22,100 Very big. The head very big. 637 01:25:22,239 --> 01:25:23,866 Time to get up. 638 01:25:26,510 --> 01:25:28,876 Professor, time to get up. 639 01:25:29,647 --> 01:25:31,615 Come on, Professor, rise and shine. 640 01:25:32,783 --> 01:25:34,808 Rise and shine? 641 01:25:35,219 --> 01:25:38,086 - 7:30. - Then you rise, you shine. 642 01:25:39,123 --> 01:25:42,388 - He's always like this in the morning. - I'm not always like this! 643 01:25:42,526 --> 01:25:44,926 This particular morning I happen to be seasick. 644 01:25:45,796 --> 01:25:46,990 Too much champagne. 645 01:25:47,064 --> 01:25:49,931 I'm not sick from champagne, I'm sick from the sea! 646 01:25:50,100 --> 01:25:54,036 - It's not necessary to yell at her. - I'll yell at whoever I want to yell at! 647 01:25:54,204 --> 01:25:57,401 - He always yells like this. - Let me out of here! 648 01:26:00,544 --> 01:26:04,810 7:30 in the morning, you idiots, I'm seasick! 649 01:26:08,185 --> 01:26:10,176 Rise and shine. 650 01:26:15,192 --> 01:26:17,752 Help! Max! 651 01:26:21,765 --> 01:26:23,323 I'm coming, Professor. 652 01:26:24,702 --> 01:26:26,294 I got you! 653 01:26:52,331 --> 01:26:54,322 You're wasting your time. 654 01:26:55,234 --> 01:26:57,225 - Perhaps. - We're melting. 655 01:26:58,237 --> 01:27:00,671 - Slowly. - We're going to sink. 656 01:27:01,306 --> 01:27:04,503 - Eventually. - Then you're wasting your time! 657 01:27:05,611 --> 01:27:07,806 I shall place this log... 658 01:27:09,148 --> 01:27:12,117 ...in a water-tight container, if found... 659 01:27:12,785 --> 01:27:16,846 ...it shall provide valuable information for those who may follow. 660 01:27:17,356 --> 01:27:19,847 Valuable information for those who may follow. 661 01:27:20,793 --> 01:27:23,193 Professor, I got an idea. 662 01:27:23,862 --> 01:27:27,059 Instead of the book, why don't you and me get into the container? 663 01:27:27,166 --> 01:27:28,463 Shut up! 664 01:27:29,334 --> 01:27:31,268 - We got to do something. - Don't worry. 665 01:27:31,637 --> 01:27:35,505 Before this iceberg melts and we drown like rats, we're going to do plenty. 666 01:27:36,675 --> 01:27:38,370 We're going to starve! 667 01:27:41,880 --> 01:27:44,815 Miss Dubois, I recommend we have cold meals from now on... 668 01:27:44,917 --> 01:27:46,942 ...we're melting fast enough as it is. 669 01:27:47,653 --> 01:27:51,111 What difference does it make? A few hours one way or another. 670 01:27:51,356 --> 01:27:54,450 Minutes have made the difference in survival, Miss Dubois. 671 01:27:55,994 --> 01:28:00,658 Mr. Leslie, I suspect you are being unrealistically optimistic for my benefit. 672 01:28:01,266 --> 01:28:02,893 And it isn't at all necessary. 673 01:28:03,101 --> 01:28:07,765 We're lost on an iceberg, and doomed to drift with the tide and melt. 674 01:28:11,076 --> 01:28:13,067 You're a brave woman, Miss Dubois. 675 01:28:14,279 --> 01:28:15,405 Red sky. 676 01:28:17,783 --> 01:28:19,011 So what? 677 01:28:19,485 --> 01:28:21,214 There's going to be a storm. 678 01:28:21,954 --> 01:28:23,615 What are you talking about? 679 01:28:24,189 --> 01:28:26,521 "Red sky in the morning, sailor, take warning." 680 01:28:26,859 --> 01:28:30,522 You thimble-headed gherkin, do you realize the odds against a storm... 681 01:28:30,596 --> 01:28:33,997 ...in this part of the ocean at this time of year? 100-to-1. 682 01:28:48,146 --> 01:28:50,114 Throw me a rope! 683 01:28:59,658 --> 01:29:02,126 "Red sky in the morning, sailor, take warning." 684 01:29:02,861 --> 01:29:05,352 Why you, nincompoop! 685 01:29:09,801 --> 01:29:11,200 Max! 686 01:29:28,887 --> 01:29:30,013 Another foot. 687 01:29:30,289 --> 01:29:31,449 Another foot. 688 01:29:32,858 --> 01:29:34,519 Thirty-seven inches to go. 689 01:29:34,893 --> 01:29:37,054 Thirty-seven inches to go. 690 01:29:37,429 --> 01:29:41,092 At the rate we've been melting that's good for about one more week. 691 01:29:41,433 --> 01:29:43,162 You better keep it to yourself. 692 01:29:43,702 --> 01:29:46,102 Of course I'll keep it to myself. 693 01:29:47,639 --> 01:29:51,473 Until the water reaches my lower lip, then I'll mention it to somebody. 694 01:29:58,650 --> 01:30:00,811 What was the professor complaining about? 695 01:30:01,386 --> 01:30:03,411 You know the professor. 696 01:30:03,822 --> 01:30:07,451 He thinks we're melting too fast, and he was venting his wrath on the gods. 697 01:30:08,961 --> 01:30:10,622 Are we melting too fast? 698 01:30:11,129 --> 01:30:14,257 I don't think so. According to my calculations... 699 01:30:14,633 --> 01:30:17,898 ...we'll reach land just about the time that our feet get wet. 700 01:30:26,378 --> 01:30:28,141 - I'm hungry. - She's getting it. 701 01:30:28,313 --> 01:30:30,508 How long does it take to open a can of beans? 702 01:30:30,649 --> 01:30:32,776 The eternal struggle takes time, Max. 703 01:30:32,951 --> 01:30:35,078 What struggle? She's got a can opener. 704 01:30:35,220 --> 01:30:39,714 You cork-brain, I'm talking about man, woman, sex, conquest. 705 01:30:40,125 --> 01:30:41,285 What was that? 706 01:30:41,593 --> 01:30:45,154 He's making his move. And I'm sure she's interested. 707 01:30:45,297 --> 01:30:47,765 But unless I miss my guess she will never submit. 708 01:30:47,933 --> 01:30:49,798 If she does, we won't get any beans. 709 01:30:49,868 --> 01:30:53,395 It's a contest, and he's using weapons that have toppled everything... 710 01:30:53,538 --> 01:30:55,972 ...from a Kansas farm girl to a European duchess. 711 01:30:56,141 --> 01:30:58,371 But she will counter with women's rights. 712 01:30:59,344 --> 01:31:00,675 That's terrible. 713 01:31:01,446 --> 01:31:05,906 For a man like Leslie, that's terrible. Like me, he must win on his own terms. 714 01:31:06,818 --> 01:31:09,480 She recognizes no terms except her own. 715 01:31:09,688 --> 01:31:11,178 Come and get it. 716 01:31:11,657 --> 01:31:12,646 You see? 717 01:31:14,693 --> 01:31:16,627 Maybe she doesn't mean us. 718 01:31:36,782 --> 01:31:38,682 Hey, Professor. 719 01:31:40,185 --> 01:31:42,483 Hey, Professor, up and at 'em. 720 01:31:43,989 --> 01:31:45,354 Up and at 'em? 721 01:31:46,058 --> 01:31:48,925 - It's 7:30. Up and at 'em. - "Up and at 'em!" 722 01:31:49,061 --> 01:31:50,119 Don't yell! 723 01:31:50,429 --> 01:31:52,397 Always yells like that in the morning. 724 01:31:52,631 --> 01:31:56,089 You idiot! "Hey, Professor, up and at 'em." 725 01:31:57,769 --> 01:32:00,761 "Hey, Professor, up and at 'em, it's 7:30." 726 01:32:02,174 --> 01:32:04,267 We're underwater! 727 01:32:04,509 --> 01:32:07,945 We're underwater! We're doomed! 728 01:32:08,346 --> 01:32:10,814 - We'll make it. - We'll make what? 729 01:32:11,149 --> 01:32:12,673 - Land. - Land! 730 01:32:13,852 --> 01:32:14,841 Land! 731 01:32:16,588 --> 01:32:19,113 It's probably East Cape. I see a ship in the harbor. 732 01:32:19,491 --> 01:32:22,187 We're saved. We're saved! 733 01:32:22,661 --> 01:32:25,425 Max, we're saved! We're saved! 734 01:32:27,065 --> 01:32:29,659 - I am Professor Fate! - We're saved! 735 01:32:30,736 --> 01:32:32,670 Max, my trusty trout, the cannon. 736 01:32:33,472 --> 01:32:35,770 Fire the cannon, let them know we're here! 737 01:32:40,512 --> 01:32:42,639 Push the button, Max! 738 01:32:47,486 --> 01:32:49,454 Max! 739 01:32:51,690 --> 01:32:53,681 Ahoy! 740 01:32:56,428 --> 01:32:58,293 Ahoy! 741 01:32:58,497 --> 01:33:02,024 Isn't it wonderful to see an American ship in this godforsaken outpost? 742 01:33:02,267 --> 01:33:05,327 It is indeed. It's probably from San Francisco or Seattle. 743 01:33:05,737 --> 01:33:08,035 Ahoy, iceberg. 744 01:33:09,808 --> 01:33:11,207 It's me! 745 01:33:12,144 --> 01:33:13,771 It's me! 746 01:33:14,513 --> 01:33:17,846 If I didn't know better I would say that's... 747 01:33:20,085 --> 01:33:21,245 It's me! 748 01:33:22,420 --> 01:33:24,217 - Hezekiah. - What? 749 01:33:30,362 --> 01:33:32,489 You gave me your word and I trusted you. 750 01:33:32,731 --> 01:33:36,292 Then you handcuffed Hezekiah to the Atchison, Topeka and Santa Fe. 751 01:33:36,401 --> 01:33:37,732 It was the Southern Pacific. 752 01:33:37,869 --> 01:33:40,531 What has that got to do with it? You gave me your word. 753 01:33:40,639 --> 01:33:42,800 - You gave me no choice! - You lie! 754 01:33:42,974 --> 01:33:44,908 I told you I would finish the race. 755 01:33:50,115 --> 01:33:53,084 - Push the button, Max. - Are you sure this is such a good idea? 756 01:33:53,251 --> 01:33:55,811 She is his Achilles' heel, she is our ace in the hole. 757 01:33:55,921 --> 01:33:58,389 - She must not be left behind now, Max! - I know! 758 01:33:58,723 --> 01:34:00,122 Push the button. 759 01:34:09,267 --> 01:34:10,791 But you can't leave me here. 760 01:34:10,969 --> 01:34:12,300 Boss! 761 01:34:24,216 --> 01:34:27,481 We want jobs. We want jobs. 762 01:34:30,121 --> 01:34:31,383 Frisbee? 763 01:34:33,024 --> 01:34:34,252 Frisbee! 764 01:34:38,096 --> 01:34:38,926 Frisbee? 765 01:34:39,197 --> 01:34:40,926 I'm sorry, dear. 766 01:34:41,900 --> 01:34:43,765 - Capitulate, Henry. - Never. 767 01:34:44,035 --> 01:34:48,233 Well, remember we're having the Simpsons to dinner. Now try not to be late. 768 01:34:48,974 --> 01:34:50,532 Excuse me. 769 01:34:53,678 --> 01:34:55,145 I'm sorry, dear. 770 01:34:55,380 --> 01:34:57,280 I could hardly get across the hall. 771 01:34:57,382 --> 01:35:00,249 Why are you complaining? I have to sleep with their leader. 772 01:35:00,318 --> 01:35:01,683 This is from Reuters. 773 01:35:01,820 --> 01:35:03,583 "Last report dated March 10. 774 01:35:03,722 --> 01:35:06,816 "Fate's car still in lead and nearing Srednek Kolimsk." 775 01:35:08,493 --> 01:35:11,189 They could have reached the Lena River by now. 776 01:35:29,314 --> 01:35:31,509 - Hey, Professor, what is this? - Shut up. 777 01:36:04,049 --> 01:36:06,415 You give them beads, makes them friendly. 778 01:36:07,953 --> 01:36:10,080 Obviously, they don't know who I am. 779 01:36:16,528 --> 01:36:19,361 I am professor Fate! 780 01:36:33,812 --> 01:36:35,370 You want to try the beads? 781 01:36:37,082 --> 01:36:38,811 What is the word for "friends"? 782 01:36:38,950 --> 01:36:40,144 - Professor... - Shut up! 783 01:36:40,251 --> 01:36:42,811 - I don't know this language. - Get the dictionary. 784 01:36:45,790 --> 01:36:47,257 - I've got it. - What is it? 785 01:36:48,393 --> 01:36:49,917 I can't pronounce it. 786 01:36:54,966 --> 01:36:55,990 Very simple. 787 01:36:57,202 --> 01:37:00,365 - "Drozia." - Drozia. 788 01:37:03,942 --> 01:37:07,503 I speak, read and write French, Russian and Arabic. 789 01:37:37,609 --> 01:37:40,737 Max, stick with the car! 790 01:37:52,190 --> 01:37:54,658 She don't act like she's being kidnapped. 791 01:37:59,330 --> 01:38:00,922 Max! 792 01:38:07,205 --> 01:38:11,164 Boss, this dispatch just came in from Maggie Dubois. 793 01:38:11,976 --> 01:38:14,069 "Have crossed Carpanian border. 794 01:38:14,245 --> 01:38:17,078 "No contact with Leslie's car in nearly three weeks. 795 01:38:17,282 --> 01:38:19,876 "So there's no way of telling who's in the lead." 796 01:38:22,187 --> 01:38:24,951 The Webber Motor Car Company built the Leslie Special. 797 01:38:25,156 --> 01:38:26,987 - Have they integrated yet? - No. 798 01:38:27,492 --> 01:38:29,585 They still refuse to hire any women. 799 01:38:30,061 --> 01:38:32,962 Until Webber changes its policy, there will be no mention... 800 01:38:33,031 --> 01:38:35,226 ...of the Leslie Special in this newspaper. 801 01:38:35,333 --> 01:38:37,961 But you can't do that. We'll lose their advertising. 802 01:38:39,304 --> 01:38:42,000 Mr. Frisbee, until my husband is released... 803 01:38:42,107 --> 01:38:44,701 ...from Happy Acres, I am in charge here. 804 01:38:44,909 --> 01:38:46,103 Yes, sir... Ma'am. 805 01:38:46,377 --> 01:38:47,469 Now, let's see. 806 01:38:48,113 --> 01:38:52,049 They should be approaching the next gasoline stop... 807 01:38:52,217 --> 01:38:54,412 ...which is Potzdorf. 808 01:39:44,002 --> 01:39:45,629 I am General Kuhster. 809 01:39:45,837 --> 01:39:48,931 I will escort you to the palace where you will be the guests... 810 01:39:49,040 --> 01:39:51,338 ...of His Royal Highness, Prince Hapnick. 811 01:39:52,143 --> 01:39:53,576 We are deeply honored. 812 01:39:57,749 --> 01:39:59,080 Who's Prince Hapnick? 813 01:39:59,284 --> 01:40:01,616 He's the royal heir to the throne. 814 01:41:31,276 --> 01:41:33,676 I say we should've dumped her a long time ago! 815 01:41:33,811 --> 01:41:36,780 I say we shall dump her when I say we'll dump her! 816 01:41:36,948 --> 01:41:38,848 She's playing you for a sucker! 817 01:41:42,587 --> 01:41:44,054 Good afternoon, gentlemen. 818 01:41:52,997 --> 01:41:54,225 What do you want? 819 01:41:55,833 --> 01:41:56,822 Who are you? 820 01:41:57,669 --> 01:41:59,660 Professor Fate. And who might you be? 821 01:42:00,004 --> 01:42:02,234 - Incredible. - Amazing. 822 01:42:05,710 --> 01:42:06,802 Unhand me. 823 01:42:06,944 --> 01:42:09,242 I found this wildcat swimming in the lake. 824 01:42:09,480 --> 01:42:11,641 I demand to know what this is all about? 825 01:42:12,617 --> 01:42:13,948 It's very simple: 826 01:42:14,319 --> 01:42:16,583 You and your friends are under arrest. 827 01:42:35,373 --> 01:42:38,308 - Will you be in Potzdorf long, Mr. Leslie? - I'm afraid not. 828 01:42:38,576 --> 01:42:40,407 We leave tomorrow morning. Early. 829 01:42:40,645 --> 01:42:43,478 Where is your competitor, this Professor Fate? 830 01:42:43,848 --> 01:42:47,511 - I suspect not far behind. - Lf he ain't ahead of us already. 831 01:42:47,652 --> 01:42:49,984 Have you met the Crown Prince yet, Mr. Leslie? 832 01:42:50,121 --> 01:42:51,713 No, I haven't had the honor. 833 01:42:58,863 --> 01:43:02,390 His Royal Highness, Crown Prince Frederick Hapnick! 834 01:43:26,424 --> 01:43:27,550 Hey, boss... 835 01:43:27,925 --> 01:43:30,393 - Yeah, but that's... - No, it isn't. 836 01:43:36,467 --> 01:43:38,059 That was exhausting. 837 01:43:51,849 --> 01:43:53,146 Your Highness! 838 01:44:01,325 --> 01:44:05,193 Your highness, may I present the Great Leslie. 839 01:44:05,329 --> 01:44:08,457 - Your Highness. - And this is Mr. Hezekiah. 840 01:44:09,033 --> 01:44:11,524 Welcome to Potzdorf. 841 01:44:12,003 --> 01:44:15,700 Excuse me, Your Highness, but do you have any relatives in the United States? 842 01:44:15,807 --> 01:44:17,968 Me? Relatives in the States? 843 01:44:19,477 --> 01:44:22,207 It's of no consequence, Sire. It's just that you bear... 844 01:44:22,280 --> 01:44:24,805 ...an uncanny resemblance to someone we both know. 845 01:44:24,982 --> 01:44:26,973 - Someone who looks like me? - Yes, sir. 846 01:44:32,824 --> 01:44:33,756 Poor fellow. 847 01:45:23,107 --> 01:45:25,041 May I have the honor of this dance? 848 01:46:35,313 --> 01:46:37,838 In the Kingdom of Carpania if one doesn't waltz... 849 01:46:37,949 --> 01:46:40,349 ...one doesn't dance. And I love to dance. 850 01:46:40,851 --> 01:46:42,842 Only problem is, I hate the waltz. 851 01:46:43,921 --> 01:46:46,549 I waltz just enough to comply with tradition... 852 01:46:46,691 --> 01:46:49,216 ...then I sneak off to more rewarding activities. 853 01:46:49,327 --> 01:46:50,453 Brandy! 854 01:46:50,828 --> 01:46:53,388 I should have scheduled divine entertainment for you: 855 01:46:53,497 --> 01:46:56,432 Carpania's full of forests. The forests are full of gypsies... 856 01:46:56,601 --> 01:47:00,037 ...and the gypsies are full of shenanigans such as swallowing swords... 857 01:47:00,204 --> 01:47:02,229 ...and chewing broken glass, eating fire. 858 01:47:02,340 --> 01:47:04,399 It's wonderful! I don't know how they do it. 859 01:47:04,508 --> 01:47:06,908 Your Highness should visit India one day. 860 01:47:08,112 --> 01:47:11,775 India, isn't that where they have those Hindu persons walking on hot coals? 861 01:47:11,882 --> 01:47:13,144 And lie on nails! 862 01:47:13,918 --> 01:47:16,079 They train those hideous snakes! 863 01:47:17,989 --> 01:47:21,356 I think I'm supposed to go to India, after I assume the throne... 864 01:47:21,559 --> 01:47:23,527 - Do we go to India, General? - Yes. 865 01:47:23,694 --> 01:47:28,063 Good, I can hardly wait. Sit. Here, have a cigar. 866 01:47:28,532 --> 01:47:31,933 The coronation is tomorrow. I hope you'll stay, you Great Leslie, you. 867 01:47:32,036 --> 01:47:33,731 I'd be most honored, Your Highness. 868 01:47:33,804 --> 01:47:38,264 But if you attend the coronation, won't you lose time in your race to Paris? 869 01:47:38,376 --> 01:47:41,868 Since there hasn't been report Professor Fate has crossed your border... 870 01:47:41,979 --> 01:47:43,776 ...I assume that I'm in the lead. 871 01:47:43,848 --> 01:47:45,839 But he might cross at any moment. 872 01:47:47,051 --> 01:47:49,019 It's been my experience, General... 873 01:47:50,154 --> 01:47:53,453 ...that there is little advantage to winning if one wins too easily. 874 01:47:57,695 --> 01:47:59,720 What do you say to that, General? 875 01:48:00,231 --> 01:48:02,961 An admirable point of view. For anyone, but a soldier. 876 01:48:03,467 --> 01:48:08,131 In my profession, to win is imperative. To win easily is a blessing. 877 01:48:10,307 --> 01:48:14,073 Yes, blessing. He has terrible mottos written all over his walls like: 878 01:48:14,679 --> 01:48:18,240 "If a good soldier dies with his boots on, rest assured they're polished." 879 01:48:21,419 --> 01:48:25,116 - Good evening, Your Highness. - Rolfe, you rogue, where have you been? 880 01:48:25,256 --> 01:48:28,714 My apologies for being late, Your Highness, but I was delayed by... 881 01:48:28,859 --> 01:48:30,087 ...some last minute business. 882 01:48:30,161 --> 01:48:32,789 You haven't been dueling again, you naughty boy. 883 01:48:33,230 --> 01:48:34,527 No, Your Highness. 884 01:48:37,068 --> 01:48:40,196 Mr. Leslie, this is Baron Rolfe Von Stuppe. 885 01:48:40,671 --> 01:48:43,606 Baron Von Stuppe, is Carpania's greatest swordsman. 886 01:48:43,774 --> 01:48:45,969 Matter of fact, his prowess with the blade... 887 01:48:46,077 --> 01:48:48,841 ...is surpassed only by his reputation with the ladies. 888 01:48:48,946 --> 01:48:50,345 - Baron. - I'm honored. 889 01:48:50,514 --> 01:48:54,473 Sit and drink up. The evening's young, we're all going to have such a gay... 890 01:48:54,652 --> 01:48:56,483 Brandy! What kept you? 891 01:48:58,823 --> 01:49:00,814 What makes you so great, Mr. Leslie? 892 01:49:02,059 --> 01:49:06,393 Greatness is a light-hearted title for theatrical amusements. 893 01:49:07,131 --> 01:49:09,656 Or a definition endowed on men... 894 01:49:09,800 --> 01:49:12,166 ...too long dead to know that its been awarded. 895 01:49:14,105 --> 01:49:15,470 I'm simply Leslie. 896 01:49:16,340 --> 01:49:18,467 And I'm at your service, Your Highness. 897 01:49:34,658 --> 01:49:35,852 Goodness gracious. 898 01:49:36,127 --> 01:49:38,891 You know there's one thing wrong with living in a palace: 899 01:49:38,996 --> 01:49:41,624 It takes so long to get from one place to another. 900 01:49:41,766 --> 01:49:44,735 I live in a constant state of exhaustion. Poor Prince! 901 01:49:45,102 --> 01:49:48,538 One good thing, when one was young, you could play along the corridors. 902 01:49:48,706 --> 01:49:52,403 I used to ride my pony up and down this corridor when I was young. 903 01:49:52,510 --> 01:49:54,740 Then I grew up and got drunk, and fell off. 904 01:50:00,017 --> 01:50:01,541 I'm going to bed, now. 905 01:50:02,720 --> 01:50:04,187 Good night, Your Highness. 906 01:50:04,288 --> 01:50:06,813 - Who is going to tuck me in? - I can manage that. 907 01:50:06,957 --> 01:50:09,949 No. You're the sloppiest tucker-inner in all Potzdorf. 908 01:50:10,094 --> 01:50:13,552 If there's anything I abhor, it's a sloppy tucker-inner. 909 01:50:16,433 --> 01:50:20,199 Good night, you good Leslie, you. Sleep tight and don't let the bedbugs bite. 910 01:50:28,212 --> 01:50:29,770 There, kids. 911 01:50:32,650 --> 01:50:34,413 They've been waiting for me. 912 01:50:40,224 --> 01:50:41,919 Mumsey... 913 01:50:42,326 --> 01:50:46,262 ...l'm afraid I had a teeny-weeny bit too much to drink. 914 01:50:47,097 --> 01:50:50,931 But then again, I always have a teeny-weeny bit too much to drink. 915 01:50:53,537 --> 01:50:56,097 Because Mumsey isn't here to scold me. 916 01:50:56,507 --> 01:50:58,270 I wish Mumsey were here. 917 01:51:29,640 --> 01:51:31,130 Hello. 918 01:51:35,779 --> 01:51:37,542 Good night, Mumsey. 919 01:52:01,672 --> 01:52:03,003 Running like a top. 920 01:52:04,608 --> 01:52:08,544 Good mechanics always got to keep checking. Every little thing. 921 01:52:08,946 --> 01:52:10,277 A beautiful machine. 922 01:52:10,581 --> 01:52:11,741 Indeed it is. 923 01:52:12,082 --> 01:52:15,609 And you make sure nobody gets nearer than 50 feet to it, you understand? 924 01:52:16,420 --> 01:52:18,752 Unless of course, it's me or... 925 01:52:19,056 --> 01:52:20,751 ...Mr. Leslie. - Don't worry. 926 01:52:21,592 --> 01:52:23,423 Well, I'll see you in the morning. 927 01:52:23,928 --> 01:52:25,657 Looks like a beautiful night. 928 01:52:28,966 --> 01:52:31,730 I think I'll just take a little stroll around the palace. 929 01:52:48,986 --> 01:52:50,476 Don't make too much noise. 930 01:52:51,121 --> 01:52:52,349 It's a secret. 931 01:52:52,823 --> 01:52:54,814 A secret? I love secrets. 932 01:52:56,660 --> 01:52:59,390 - What's the secret? - What we're doing, your Highness. 933 01:53:00,230 --> 01:53:02,425 We're going to take you for a little ride. 934 01:53:03,000 --> 01:53:04,991 Good. Where are we going? 935 01:53:05,169 --> 01:53:07,160 For a little ride, your Highness. 936 01:53:09,907 --> 01:53:11,204 In you go. 937 01:53:17,114 --> 01:53:18,445 Speed on. 938 01:53:32,629 --> 01:53:35,462 King, I'm going to be king. 939 01:54:12,636 --> 01:54:15,196 It'll do no good to get the bars out off the windows. 940 01:54:15,339 --> 01:54:16,772 You and your stupid ideas. 941 01:54:16,940 --> 01:54:19,272 Max can't accomplish anything with a pen knife. 942 01:54:19,476 --> 01:54:21,876 And if he could, it's at least a 100-foot drop. 943 01:54:32,222 --> 01:54:37,285 Unhand me! You blackguards, scoundrels! Unhand me! 944 01:54:37,561 --> 01:54:39,620 I demand to see the American Consul. 945 01:54:41,065 --> 01:54:42,999 You blundering idiots! 946 01:54:43,233 --> 01:54:46,828 You'll answer to my government for this outrage! Outrage! 947 01:54:47,204 --> 01:54:50,731 You have kidnapped me. Fate the Magnificent! 948 01:54:50,908 --> 01:54:53,877 Let's get practical. I don't care what you do to the others... 949 01:54:53,977 --> 01:54:56,605 ...as long as you let me go. What do you say to $500? 950 01:55:11,395 --> 01:55:12,726 Professor... 951 01:55:13,897 --> 01:55:17,060 ...allow me to present His Royal Highness, Prince Hapnick. 952 01:55:17,401 --> 01:55:19,232 Heir to the throne of Carpania. 953 01:55:29,346 --> 01:55:30,813 Hi, there. 954 01:55:46,530 --> 01:55:47,690 It's out! 955 01:56:22,299 --> 01:56:23,061 No! 956 01:56:23,367 --> 01:56:24,994 I suggest you reconsider. 957 01:56:25,536 --> 01:56:26,867 I won't do it! 958 01:56:27,905 --> 01:56:29,896 Then you leave us no alternative. 959 01:56:30,140 --> 01:56:31,129 I'll do it. 960 01:56:33,143 --> 01:56:35,202 Don't just stand there, do something. 961 01:56:35,913 --> 01:56:37,972 Hezekiah, please wake up. 962 01:56:38,982 --> 01:56:40,074 Hezekiah? 963 01:56:42,152 --> 01:56:43,551 Please, Hezekiah. 964 01:56:44,655 --> 01:56:45,644 Max! 965 01:56:48,592 --> 01:56:49,957 Open this door! 966 01:56:50,394 --> 01:56:52,885 Max, you little rat! I'll get you for this. 967 01:57:07,744 --> 01:57:09,678 By tomorrow, you'll be king. 968 01:57:09,947 --> 01:57:13,542 After that you declare General Kuhster chancellor and quietly abdicate. 969 01:57:14,518 --> 01:57:18,352 Your Highness, remember one slip and you're dead. 970 01:57:19,456 --> 01:57:20,889 Aren't we all? 971 01:57:48,752 --> 01:57:49,810 Good evening. 972 01:57:52,122 --> 01:57:55,285 When we get back to the palace, you must trim your mustache. 973 01:57:55,492 --> 01:57:57,585 You must look exactly like the prince. 974 01:57:58,662 --> 01:57:59,890 Can you laugh? 975 01:58:00,297 --> 01:58:01,924 What do you mean can I laugh? 976 01:58:02,032 --> 01:58:04,796 - The prince has a very individual laugh. - Like what? 977 01:58:13,410 --> 01:58:17,176 No, that's much too bass. The prince is more of a soprano. Try it. 978 01:58:18,582 --> 01:58:19,981 Try it once more. 979 01:59:03,293 --> 01:59:05,420 I demand to know what this is all about. 980 01:59:05,529 --> 01:59:07,656 You've been told. You're under arrest. 981 01:59:07,964 --> 01:59:09,397 I know, but for what? 982 01:59:09,499 --> 01:59:11,490 - Spying. - Spying? 983 01:59:18,842 --> 01:59:22,972 At last, the Great Leslie is finished. I've won! 984 01:59:23,180 --> 01:59:26,149 They said I never could. Get off of the bed! 985 01:59:26,483 --> 01:59:30,317 Don't you try any double-crosses, my friend, keep our deal. 986 01:59:30,554 --> 01:59:33,489 He stays in the pokey until I'm safely in Paris. 987 01:59:33,590 --> 01:59:36,718 When it comes to double-crossers, you are looking at the king! 988 01:59:37,794 --> 01:59:41,025 Not until you've trimmed your mustache, Your Majesty. 989 01:59:45,102 --> 01:59:46,467 I hate you. 990 02:00:22,372 --> 02:00:24,135 I've come to see the Great Leslie. 991 02:00:24,241 --> 02:00:26,835 I'm sorry, Padre, I can't let anyone see the prisoner... 992 02:00:26,910 --> 02:00:28,537 ...without the proper authority. 993 02:00:28,645 --> 02:00:30,704 I understand. Bless you, my son. 994 02:01:02,279 --> 02:01:03,303 Leslie! 995 02:01:03,480 --> 02:01:05,243 I'm here. In here. 996 02:01:11,988 --> 02:01:14,183 - Max! - We've got to save the professor. 997 02:01:15,125 --> 02:01:17,093 What about Miss Dubois and Hezekiah? 998 02:01:17,260 --> 02:01:19,091 - They're with the baron. - The baron? 999 02:01:19,463 --> 02:01:22,023 He's got everybody. We've got to go save the professor. 1000 02:01:50,093 --> 02:01:51,958 Stop! Stop! 1001 02:01:54,130 --> 02:01:54,892 Escaped? 1002 02:01:55,198 --> 02:01:56,825 With a small friar. 1003 02:01:57,234 --> 02:01:59,225 Leslie escaped with a chicken? 1004 02:01:59,402 --> 02:02:02,803 No, you idiot, with a friar. A monk. A priest. 1005 02:02:03,106 --> 02:02:04,232 What should we do? 1006 02:02:04,307 --> 02:02:06,502 The coronation must take place without delay. 1007 02:02:06,610 --> 02:02:09,443 With Leslie free, every minute counts. 1008 02:02:15,585 --> 02:02:18,577 You're right. With Leslie on the loose, every second counts. 1009 02:02:22,526 --> 02:02:25,086 Are you sure that the baron's castle is on a lake? 1010 02:02:25,295 --> 02:02:27,058 I'm positive. Great big lake. 1011 02:02:27,230 --> 02:02:29,858 And the only lake on this map is straight ahead. 1012 02:02:34,271 --> 02:02:35,761 You're not serious? 1013 02:02:36,606 --> 02:02:38,005 Deadly serious. 1014 02:02:39,276 --> 02:02:40,903 You're a sadistic fiend. 1015 02:02:41,411 --> 02:02:44,574 He has only to answer a few simple questions. 1016 02:02:44,848 --> 02:02:46,839 Not the mustache. 1017 02:02:49,319 --> 02:02:50,980 Why did you come here? 1018 02:02:52,722 --> 02:02:53,984 Who sent you? 1019 02:02:56,226 --> 02:02:57,818 - Proceed. - No! 1020 02:02:58,895 --> 02:03:01,329 Touch one hair on his head and you'll answer to... 1021 02:03:01,398 --> 02:03:04,458 ...Teddy Roosevelt and the United States government! 1022 02:03:04,534 --> 02:03:06,729 "My country 'tis of thee 1023 02:03:06,970 --> 02:03:11,339 "Sweet land of liberty of thee I sing" 1024 02:03:19,583 --> 02:03:23,110 That's it. On the lake. Come on, we'll save the professor. 1025 02:03:24,120 --> 02:03:28,216 Maximillian, if Miss Dubois and Hezekiah are not in that castle... 1026 02:03:28,358 --> 02:03:31,521 They're there, I swear it. Come on, save the professor. 1027 02:03:34,030 --> 02:03:36,555 They're there. Cross my heart. 1028 02:03:42,038 --> 02:03:43,869 Terrific. 1029 02:03:45,375 --> 02:03:49,175 What's more, do as I tell you. Stay down. Down. 1030 02:03:54,584 --> 02:03:57,485 "Land where our fathers died 1031 02:03:57,854 --> 02:04:03,190 "Land of thy pilgrim's pride from every mountainside 1032 02:04:03,393 --> 02:04:06,021 "Let freedom ring" 1033 02:04:06,997 --> 02:04:08,487 Shut up, Professor. 1034 02:04:23,079 --> 02:04:24,205 They're there. 1035 02:06:37,847 --> 02:06:40,008 Here comes the Marines! 1036 02:07:56,192 --> 02:07:57,625 Good evening, Baron. 1037 02:07:58,161 --> 02:08:00,595 Well, Mr. Leslie. 1038 02:08:01,598 --> 02:08:03,259 What a pleasant surprise. 1039 02:08:03,933 --> 02:08:06,424 I half expected to see you again, but... 1040 02:08:07,871 --> 02:08:09,668 ...not with a sword in your hand. 1041 02:08:09,973 --> 02:08:11,440 Do you prefer the foil? 1042 02:08:11,574 --> 02:08:14,008 Not particularly. It happened to be convenient. 1043 02:08:14,110 --> 02:08:16,044 I presume you know how to use one. 1044 02:08:17,447 --> 02:08:19,438 I hope that won't be necessary. 1045 02:08:20,250 --> 02:08:21,547 I'm sure you do. 1046 02:08:25,221 --> 02:08:27,849 Will you release Miss Dubois and the others? 1047 02:08:28,791 --> 02:08:31,021 - No. - I'm afraid this will be necessary. 1048 02:08:31,327 --> 02:08:33,056 You're being very foolish. 1049 02:08:33,363 --> 02:08:37,129 That's an assumption, Baron. You make me the victim even before we start. 1050 02:08:38,201 --> 02:08:39,259 It's your life. 1051 02:08:39,769 --> 02:08:43,068 You're assuming again. En garde. 1052 02:09:05,828 --> 02:09:08,991 Very adroit, Mr. Leslie. Very skilled. 1053 02:09:35,191 --> 02:09:39,059 My compliments, Mr. Leslie. You handle the foil very well. 1054 02:09:39,429 --> 02:09:41,090 Thank you, Baron. So do you. 1055 02:09:41,331 --> 02:09:44,892 Personally, I prefer a man's weapon. How are you with a saber? 1056 02:09:45,234 --> 02:09:47,031 There's only one way to find out. 1057 02:10:06,255 --> 02:10:07,882 Surround him! 1058 02:10:09,692 --> 02:10:11,626 Look out! Look out! 1059 02:10:14,397 --> 02:10:15,989 Oh, the smoke! 1060 02:11:56,199 --> 02:11:57,427 Running away, Baron? 1061 02:11:57,500 --> 02:11:59,798 As a very wise English gentleman once said: 1062 02:11:59,869 --> 02:12:03,066 "He who fights and runs away, may live to fight another day." 1063 02:12:03,272 --> 02:12:05,934 So until another day, Mr. Leslie. 1064 02:12:08,911 --> 02:12:12,278 Please excuse me. I have a boat waiting. 1065 02:13:36,098 --> 02:13:37,429 Faster! 1066 02:15:13,129 --> 02:15:15,689 Professor, the jig is up. 1067 02:15:38,554 --> 02:15:40,181 Your Highness. 1068 02:15:41,090 --> 02:15:44,423 Your Royal Highness. Your Royal Highness! 1069 02:16:06,382 --> 02:16:10,375 Wait, Your Royal Highness! My prince! 1070 02:16:19,295 --> 02:16:20,922 Out of the way! 1071 02:16:23,399 --> 02:16:25,196 Your Highness. 1072 02:16:49,492 --> 02:16:52,859 Your Highness, we've got to get out of here! 1073 02:17:04,473 --> 02:17:07,670 You wouldn't dare! 1074 02:17:23,292 --> 02:17:24,281 Please! 1075 02:17:40,042 --> 02:17:42,374 Wait for me. Wait for me. 1076 02:18:01,397 --> 02:18:02,955 - Your Majesty. - Hi, there. 1077 02:18:11,373 --> 02:18:12,635 Brandy! 1078 02:18:13,042 --> 02:18:14,339 Throw more brandy. 1079 02:18:15,978 --> 02:18:17,502 More brandy. 1080 02:18:18,113 --> 02:18:20,445 Brandy. Throw more brandy. 1081 02:18:24,053 --> 02:18:28,422 Rum. I never mix my pies. I want to play, too. 1082 02:18:39,835 --> 02:18:41,393 Miss Dubois! 1083 02:18:46,175 --> 02:18:47,540 Hey, Professor! 1084 02:18:51,680 --> 02:18:52,908 Hey, Professor. 1085 02:19:08,230 --> 02:19:09,891 Hey, Professor! 1086 02:19:15,838 --> 02:19:18,932 You. You're the cause of it all. It was your idea. 1087 02:19:19,141 --> 02:19:21,473 No, Your Highness. It was Baron Von Stuppe. 1088 02:19:21,577 --> 02:19:24,546 I don't care. You're banished! 1089 02:19:24,647 --> 02:19:29,084 I'm getting a new tucker-inner. Banished, banished! 1090 02:19:37,560 --> 02:19:39,152 Miss Dubois! 1091 02:19:47,603 --> 02:19:48,968 Hey, Professor! 1092 02:19:51,674 --> 02:19:55,701 - Hey, Professor, where are you? - Right here, you idiot. 1093 02:19:56,111 --> 02:19:59,308 Terrific. Let's go. I got the car. 1094 02:19:59,848 --> 02:20:02,476 More pies! More pies! 1095 02:20:07,656 --> 02:20:09,920 Oh, Leslie! Leslie! 1096 02:20:26,809 --> 02:20:30,040 Goodbye. Farewell, you good Leslie, you. 1097 02:20:30,279 --> 02:20:33,112 I hope you win. I hope you win! 1098 02:20:34,216 --> 02:20:36,309 I'll miss him. Oh, there it is! 1099 02:20:38,387 --> 02:20:39,786 General? 1100 02:21:21,597 --> 02:21:23,258 E Flat. 1101 02:21:29,304 --> 02:21:31,272 I think I better go and fix the car. 1102 02:23:05,834 --> 02:23:08,029 - Miss Dubois. - Yes? 1103 02:23:10,038 --> 02:23:13,530 I believe the time has come for us to resolve our differences. 1104 02:23:15,077 --> 02:23:16,237 Good. 1105 02:23:18,313 --> 02:23:22,272 As you know, I've steadfastly maintained... 1106 02:23:22,551 --> 02:23:27,045 ...an uncompromising position about women's rights and the equality of sexes. 1107 02:23:27,856 --> 02:23:29,187 As have I. 1108 02:23:30,292 --> 02:23:34,353 Therefore, it is safe to assume that has been the principal area of our conflict. 1109 02:23:35,564 --> 02:23:37,054 No doubt about it. 1110 02:23:38,767 --> 02:23:41,702 Therefore, in the interest of progress and harmony... 1111 02:23:41,870 --> 02:23:44,566 ...I am willing to concede to your point of view. 1112 02:23:48,243 --> 02:23:49,574 Concede? 1113 02:23:54,082 --> 02:23:56,949 You are an emancipated woman, Miss Dubois. 1114 02:23:57,486 --> 02:24:00,353 And I am an emancipated man. 1115 02:24:47,469 --> 02:24:49,164 Come back here. 1116 02:24:52,841 --> 02:24:56,106 You are the most unreasonable, inconsistent female... 1117 02:24:56,245 --> 02:24:58,475 - I'm unreasonable? I'm inconsistent? - Yes. 1118 02:24:58,714 --> 02:25:00,739 What about you? Talk about inconsistent. 1119 02:25:00,816 --> 02:25:03,114 - Inconsistent! - And unreasonable. 1120 02:25:03,218 --> 02:25:05,015 - Unreasonable! - And arrogant. 1121 02:25:05,120 --> 02:25:07,088 - Arrogant! - Yes, arrogant! 1122 02:25:07,155 --> 02:25:10,352 All right, Miss Dubois, let's discuss arrogance for a moment. 1123 02:25:10,425 --> 02:25:12,552 All right, Mr. Leslie. Let's. 1124 02:25:16,398 --> 02:25:20,994 Any woman who has the unmitigated arrogance to consider herself man's equal. 1125 02:25:21,069 --> 02:25:24,835 Any man who has the arrogance to consider himself better than a woman. 1126 02:25:24,907 --> 02:25:28,035 - Any fool knows that a woman cannot... - That's right! Any fool! 1127 02:25:28,210 --> 02:25:31,941 - You know what's the matter with you? - I know what's the matter with you. 1128 02:25:33,282 --> 02:25:34,544 What did I tell you? 1129 02:25:34,616 --> 02:25:37,608 She's going to win the race for us. The buffalo-headed vixen! 1130 02:25:38,987 --> 02:25:41,285 - I tried to kiss you. - I know what you tried. 1131 02:25:41,356 --> 02:25:43,824 You're the one that's been preaching emancipation. 1132 02:25:57,906 --> 02:26:02,002 We're going to win, Max. We're going to win! 1133 02:26:02,611 --> 02:26:05,205 I think you turn right at the next corner. 1134 02:26:17,960 --> 02:26:21,396 - You're not talking about equal rights. - I know what I'm talking about. 1135 02:26:21,463 --> 02:26:24,591 You're talking about some convenient feminine utopia... 1136 02:26:25,000 --> 02:26:27,833 ...that has all of the advantages and no responsibilities. 1137 02:26:27,936 --> 02:26:29,301 - Responsibilities? - Yes! 1138 02:26:29,371 --> 02:26:32,101 Look who's talking about responsibilities. Turn right. 1139 02:26:35,377 --> 02:26:38,505 - Go back and turn right. - We do not turn right. 1140 02:26:38,580 --> 02:26:40,514 - I know Paris. - So do I. 1141 02:26:40,582 --> 02:26:43,608 You have to turn right in order to get to the Eiffel Tower. 1142 02:26:43,685 --> 02:26:47,177 If we turn right back there, we'd end up on the Montmartre Steps. 1143 02:27:10,779 --> 02:27:13,612 You talk a good fight, but when it comes down to it... 1144 02:27:13,682 --> 02:27:17,413 ...you're as emancipated as a confirmed spinster in a knitting bee. 1145 02:27:17,486 --> 02:27:18,953 How would you know? 1146 02:27:19,021 --> 02:27:22,821 You're a suffragette. You're the one who wanted to bring sex out in the open. 1147 02:27:23,158 --> 02:27:27,151 So I brought it out into the open and I got slapped in the face for my trouble. 1148 02:27:27,596 --> 02:27:32,260 Your interpretation of bringing sex out into the open and mine are two different things. 1149 02:27:32,334 --> 02:27:35,360 Well, will you please tell me what your concept of sex is? 1150 02:27:35,437 --> 02:27:36,563 Gladly! 1151 02:27:51,253 --> 02:27:53,244 You and your stupid map! 1152 02:27:53,388 --> 02:27:56,687 She's still with him. You said if she was with him, we couldn't lose. 1153 02:27:56,825 --> 02:27:57,382 Shut up! 1154 02:28:18,547 --> 02:28:22,108 And because I consider myself sexually free and morally emancipated... 1155 02:28:22,250 --> 02:28:26,812 ...l'm a responsible, discriminating woman who doesn't intend to jump into bed... 1156 02:28:26,955 --> 02:28:30,618 ...with the first muscular egocentric male who thinks he can seduce me... 1157 02:28:30,725 --> 02:28:33,888 ...by agreeing with some of the things I believe in. 1158 02:28:33,962 --> 02:28:36,692 - I only wanted to kiss you. - Why? 1159 02:28:36,932 --> 02:28:38,763 Because I love you, that's why. 1160 02:28:39,768 --> 02:28:42,236 - You don't believe me? - I do not. 1161 02:28:46,374 --> 02:28:48,604 - What are you doing? - Proving that I love you. 1162 02:28:48,677 --> 02:28:50,201 You'll lose the race. 1163 02:28:50,378 --> 02:28:52,573 Can you think of a better way to prove it? 1164 02:29:05,827 --> 02:29:07,658 Max, I won! 1165 02:29:09,097 --> 02:29:11,998 - I won! - We won! 1166 02:29:12,200 --> 02:29:13,497 - I won! - We won! 1167 02:29:15,737 --> 02:29:18,171 - I am invincible! - We won! 1168 02:29:18,306 --> 02:29:20,171 I have beaten Leslie at last. 1169 02:29:22,677 --> 02:29:24,668 The world is mine! 1170 02:29:32,420 --> 02:29:33,910 You lost. 1171 02:29:34,556 --> 02:29:36,046 Only the race. 1172 02:29:39,561 --> 02:29:41,552 I am king! 1173 02:29:41,863 --> 02:29:44,024 I am the king. 1174 02:29:44,266 --> 02:29:49,397 No, I'm not! I didn't beat him. He let me win! 1175 02:29:49,804 --> 02:29:52,204 I can't win this way. I can only win one way: 1176 02:29:52,340 --> 02:29:54,570 My way! They let me win! 1177 02:29:54,709 --> 02:29:58,509 I can't win your way. You cheated. 1178 02:29:58,947 --> 02:30:00,278 You cheated. 1179 02:30:01,049 --> 02:30:04,280 You cheated! You cheated! 1180 02:30:04,753 --> 02:30:07,449 You cheated. I hate you. 1181 02:30:07,989 --> 02:30:09,980 I refuse to accept! 1182 02:30:10,192 --> 02:30:13,286 I won't win any way but my way. You ruined my reputation! 1183 02:30:13,395 --> 02:30:16,057 Do you hear? You, I hate! 1184 02:30:16,298 --> 02:30:18,459 You with your hair that is always combed. 1185 02:30:18,533 --> 02:30:21,627 Your suit is always white. Your car is always clean. 1186 02:30:21,770 --> 02:30:26,639 I refuse to accept. I challenge you to another race. 1187 02:30:29,911 --> 02:30:31,879 - Get off my hood. - Another race! 1188 02:31:21,229 --> 02:31:23,220 Come on, Professor, go! 1189 02:31:25,634 --> 02:31:27,101 Come on, go, go! 1190 02:31:27,168 --> 02:31:30,899 Relax, this time I'm going to win it my way. 1191 02:31:32,774 --> 02:31:34,435 Push the button, Max! 1192 02:31:35,305 --> 02:32:35,582 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/35mk9 Help other users to choose the best subtitles